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Old 02-19-2010, 04:34 PM   #3289
Avalon Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Gaia
Posts: 893
Default Re: 2012 Nexus Event Unknown Form of Energy comes our way!


In a period of my life, I had drawn the most beautiful roses I ever saw. Graphics, black and white..It was one rose actually. I was following it and drawing it since it was a bud to the end of the life of the bloom, practicaly every day...maybe about 20 drawings. My friends (artists among them) were coming and were delighted...all of them said there is a COLOR inside...

But...I was in a total existential crisis exactly that period. I experienced a break down...and...I destroyed the drawings, all of them!! In a moment of despair and "rage" against everything, I teared them apart...saying to my self I m not good enough, not worthy...nothing is worthy etc.

Now, ten years after that, I can tell you, this was an act for which I feel such a regret that I can cry and cry...

Do not destroy your roses, Daniel. Do not destroy yourself..!

We are all losers here in some way...for being looser in this System is exactly to be on the real side, to be the Rose that is worthy to be painted. Do not take it so serious, we are just passing from A to B. You are able for so much light, your present life conditions are probably (not accidentaly) composed for that purpose.

Take you mission to the end, Daniel.

With Love and Respect.

Originally Posted by 12DnAHelix View Post
I am personally going through a pretty rough patch. I have wiped my posts from this thread and wiped out my facebook network.

I am, and have always been nothing more than a failed visionary who fell through the cracks of society and civilization, damaged goods as well.

A white trash loser who isn't employed, lives on the streets and eats at a soup kitchen doesn't have anything to offer you enlightened souls.

I will keep my 12 dna strand heart-soul-star cosmic mandala, multi-universal cosmosphere and 144000 thousand faceted core crystal delusions to myself.

That's probably where they are best off, to be taken to my grave with me.

Here after my birthday on the 23, I am going out into the desert up through at least the equinox.

My computer is also on the verge of collapsing ...

My life is the story of hopes and dreams that never become manifest, no matter what; my awareness and the mandala has been nothing more than a curse on my existence.

I wish you all well with this endeavor ...
I will not be contributing anything further, nor will I be returning.

I apologize for having intruded and interfered in what you all had going on.


AstralWalker will just have to accept that my word is no good, and if my word is no good; what part of me could be any good - no part.

Last edited by Oliver; 02-19-2010 at 07:51 PM.
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