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Originally Posted by m1*
I remember watching my grandfather die at his hospital bed. At the time, I felt strongly that the doctors wanted him to die. They put a tube down his mouth and the condensation in the tube settled in his lungs, gave him pneumonia and he died (duh! idiots...). He knew he was going to die. He was pointing at the curtains. I have little faith in doctors or the medical system.
They did the same thing with my grandmother a few years later. They insisted that she was brain dead and needed to turn the machines off. So, the family agreed that is best. Then after watching her convulse and moan for several minutes, I came to the conclusion that she was murdered also.
Going to a hospital is one of the quickest ways to die in my books.
They are home now - in a better place. For that, I am glad.
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Knowing they're in a better place is all that keeps me going. I've actually seen my father since he's passed. I was sitting on the edge of my bed, listening to the song "Whispering hope" played by I believe Red and Smiley. (Or was it Reno and Smiley? I can't remember their names now. Bummer!)
An Old timey TV show. From like the 60's. (even way before my time. lol)
They played it wonderfully. Tears filled my eyes, and I thought, "Oh dad I wish you could hear this! He laid his hand on my shoulder, and I heard his voice say, "I can hear it, I'm here." And then something about him listening to them on the radio back home when he was young.
I went to my mom, and told her about the experience, and she asked me, "Don't you know who they are?" (well..... NO!) Then she proceeded to tell me they were his favorite singers when they first got married.
My dad's sister lived in the basement apartment of my mom's house, and I went down to tell her. With tears in her eyes, she affirmed to me that, yes they used to listen to it on the radio back home!
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I can relate to this. I wish the people around me, in my life, were more REAL about things. Most people are way too shallow and put LITTLE effort into understanding ANYTHING. They simply latch to what sounds good to them and makes them feel warm and fuzzy *sigh*. Then, they look at me, a person who THRIVES on learning and understanding and constantly try to convince me how I have everything all wrong, because what I say doesn't fit in their puny little head. So, I go back home - close my front door and sit here alone. Yes I know what I just said isn't very nice, but that's how I feel. Just being honest.
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OH DEFININITELY! Lots of people around here where I live are what I call Vain.
They worry so much about "how they
look to other people. Have to "FIT IN" with society. What cloths they wear, how their car looks, how their house looks, etc....
I do have to say, my dad one time told me that he and I didn't have the same life style.
My mom and my brother were very materialistic. Keep up with the Jones' sort of attitude, best cloths, best cars, houses, toys, etc...
My dad, was always the nature person. Or so I thought. He liked to farm, garden, animals, walks in the woods, live off the land, etc..
His phrase that I always heard him say was, "I want to live 60 airmiles from the nearest road."
He never liked civilization. And I have somewhat the same attitude.
So when he told me we didn't have the same life style, I was hurt.
Later, I realized he was talking about me working part time mininum paying job, and living off cash means only. Everything old, patched, broken, etc...
Eventually, I did get a better paying job, got a loan on the house, got a loan on new car, new truck, credit cards out the bum, and in debt up to my eyeballs, (somebody help me! lol)
You know what. I think I was happier when I had nothing, driving an old junker with out AC, but having no bills to have to pay.