Empathy.. A Curse, or a Gift?

[SEAM]

I believe most of the strife AND Love, on this forum and others, are derived form this trait. I just now looked into it, and understand for the first time, why I am the way I am.
I believe I just had a "Tiffany"...

1. When in public, do you constantly feel overwhelmed with inexplicable emotions for which you can’t determine the reason?
2. Do you experience other people's physical ailments?
3. Do you feel overwhelmed when watching something horrible in real life or even on television?
4. Do you ALWAYS know what someone really means?
5. Do you feel compelled to care for anyone in pain, no matter who they are and what they’ve done to you?
6. Do people open up to you – even if you don’t want them to?
7. Can you heal?

You're not crazy!

With a little self-awareness you can turn your curse into gift, especially when it comes to being able to ease the emotional and physical pain of others. For now, take consolation in the knowledge that you are not crazy!


http://hubpages.com/hub/Psychism--7-Signs-Youre-an-Empath

http://www.eliselebeau.com/empaths

I feel better, having just posted this....

[SEAM]

I also now know that my 10 YO daughter is the same. I lost my best friend, age55 last weekend, and when I came home.. holding up as strong as I could, she began crying, and ran to her room/. I asked her what was wrong, and she said she was sad because I was sad. I said, Honey, how do you know I'm sad, and she said she just knew! I've always been able to change her mood by simply willing an infusion of happiness too her... now I know why. Hmmmm

[Carmody]

Empathy is considered in anthropological psychological studies..to be the thing that created or allowed for the creation of useful and working societal aspects that were for and to the benefit of all. It is a higher level grouping survival tactic. It comes AFTER animalism.

It is the advanced societal and cultural underpinning of group function.

Now mixed in, we have the past aspect.

those who wish to remain animalistic and of low empathy seek to disrupt and tear apart any aspect of the group empathy characteristic to 'form' or 'come into being' as this disrupts their plans of remaining in their lack of empathy mode of existence.

The animals of society are fighting for their lives and have no compunctions about taking you down in the process. For them, it feels like their death..as their way of life is being attacked. to add to the misery their position and low empathy gives them method. tactic, avenues, and desire for action. which they can commit to -easily..for due to their positions they have driven/moved themselves to over the course of any given societal/cultural forming.....the capacity to do so is in place.

The natural physiological and thus connected physiological aspect of their position in this world .....is one where they arose and took over the forming societies FIRST.

This.....Before the empathy forming-bonding group care-taking aspect took place.

This is why they are seemingly 'on top' as the mass of people comes to realization of the given situation. it is always like that.

What we are doing NOW, is considered to be a thing that we periodically do to and within our standard "modus operandi". (mode of operation, 'in situ' or in situation)

Ie, we reach a point in our cultural and sociological interactions and growth..where we rise up, together, and attack (center our focus upon) the animalism and rout it from the system.

For a time.

For our empathy... disallows us from pursuing or prosecuting the low empathy types.

One must also recall that a person with low empathy..that person has discovered, through trial and error..as a child..that low empathy is not something that can be visibly shared with the mass of humanity (about 60-65% of humankind is of high empathy). They learn to hide it and their very genetic typing over time and selection has evolved to a point that they hide it very well. Natural selection for low empathy types. They gather to help each other and work with organizations that have front names and front functions. Like religion, politics, business (trade) secret societies, military, etc.


The very reason they attack others is to fulfill desire and to calm fears. They don't know love from a love direction, they know it from loss in the context of a selfish "desire-fear". They live for excitement (their designs in those areas of "entertainment") that can be gained from pastimes that invoke this aspect. High speed car driving, violent gladiator sports, war, etc.

Until the mass of society and culture that is of that 60-65% of the population rises up and shuts down the insanity of this type of "negative physiologically wired humans", until those of empathy rise up and stop this insanity, nothing will happen.

And when they are removed from a control position, like a lamprey or blood sucker, they will only be looking for a new position where they can feed--again. For that is what they are. The lamprey and the bloodsucker will ALWAYS sneak up on you. That is their nature, that is their door, that is their way. See it for what it is.


And really..... it is that simple.

[ulli]

Just last night I was thinking of a thread like this...and here it is.

I had been reading and thinking about the difference
between those who use magic and those who are spiritual
and came up with the difference being the empathy factor.

The respect for all life is the basis of spirituality,
also the non-interference principle.

Holding such a balance is an art, because as soon as help is needed and asked for
one needs to jump in there giving a helping hand,
and realize that such action is not interference.

Thanks for this thread.

[Fred Steeves]

I always find it interesting when encountering a totally new thought. The thought of empathy possibly being considered a curse has never even touched my fragile eggshell mind.

Cheers,
Fred

[Carmody]

Those who seek to control society can only exist as they do now if there is a high empathy societal and cultural group to feed off of. Which is why they want to create a herd mentality in mankind along the lines of blindness of reality as ..how else can they exist?

If society goes totally 'their way' well.... they would not be in charge anymore. Something even more ugly would arise.

That extreme ugliness is the thing hiding in the background. The thing we partially sense and have a hard time dealing with.

[PixieDust]

I was empathic as a kid but not knowing how to control it i unkowingly blocked it before i could figure out how to control it. Its coming back ever since i had my girls. Speaking of which are empathic themselves. One seems to be more empathic then the other, they're twins and just turned 2.

Its interesting because the seem to be like ying and yang, different but balance each other.

I have play dates with my friends who have kids and one day the two other kids were fighting over a stroller. the girls house we were at was having a problem with everyone playing with her toys and didnt know how to accept it and was trying to take back a stroller that the other girl was playing with, common strife among young children Charlie, my emotional one, was standing near them and watching them, she didnt want anything to do with the stroller and was playing with her own toy but made this horribly sad face and just had a complete melt down.

I believe they're crystals and have already shown signs of healing. when they were much younger, im not sure who was sending, but if they had an ailment or a pain either they would send it to me or i would pick it up. They still dont talk much yet but communicate through emotion and probably thought. I just always know what they want. what toy they're looking for, if they're looking for their sippy cups ect. When the dogs start barking and get excited they get worried and start fussing and sometimes even run over to me and cling on to me.

im happy that i have an understanding of what they're going through and i'll be able to help them learn to control it instead of blocking it like i did. I think empathy is the next step to awareness. humans will be able to just feel each other instead of talking when words can be misunderstood and have so many different meanings. I'm sure we will see many many more children with this trait, and adults who are opening up and lifting the veil.

[Nyce555]

Pretty much just described me to a T. I can feel people's emotions from a mile away. My co worker just came in my office and she was about to cry over something, and all of the sudden I felt like I was about to cry too. I had to switch the subject before I started crying. I have always been extremely sensitive to people's emotions and even stuff on tv. It gets overwhelming because I use up most of my energy on other people's feelings before I have any left for myself. Maybe this is the reason I have been a loner most of my life. I prefer to be in small groups of people, because large groups of people freak me out sometimes. It gets too overwhelming.

[Darla Ken Pearce]

Empathy. I used to have no doubt about it, I knew it was a curse. Living in large cities, for instance, San Jose, I found the very press of bodies and negative thoughts actually painful to my senses. Oppressive and dark depending on where I was located moment by moment and whoever and whatever it was that surrounded me. To know what others are thinking and feeling it a great hardship to bear. Picking up on the FEAR FACTOR alone can cripple you and you need some protections and barriers up in place in order to dull those feeling down to a low roar. It is my belief that many alcoholics and drug addicts begin as super Empaths who cannot control their environment and end up attracting all the unhappy vibes so that more and more of them manifest. They also loose control of their own senses and this lowers anyone's vibration attracting lower frequency activities to us. It can be a vicious cycle for those who are unable to break free.

For many empaths ~ to be comfortable in the presence of many others requires some kind of buffer zone where the breathing is easier. At least for me. Not too long ago we were having financial hardships and my husband and daughter wanted to take $20 and play it at the local Native American Casino in Coeur d' Alene, Idaho to see if they could win a new house. It sounded fine to me and I went along but as we waded into the crowds, it became nearly impossible for me to walk amongst so many people who were stuck in darkness and couldn't find their way out of it. It hit me like a ton of bricks and I suddenly could not breathe at all.

I could only tell my family I couldn't be in there and begin walking out of the casino. My family thought I was nuts, of course, since we had only arrived and our $20 bucks hadn't been spent. When you feel all the sadness, the lost dreams, the addictions, the smoke, the pain, well it wasn't fun for me at all and I had to wait for them in the car. It's like a scalar wave of sadness reeked out of that place and it was tangible to my vision and all senses. Had I been more in balance myself at the time, I might have been able to focus on happier vibes and been able to linger awhile. But I was unable to do it. When feelings like this come over me, I have the greatest respect for their authenticity and I have learned to honor them.

It is the reason that one day in 1997, I packed my clothing and a few belongs up and left the city not to return for ten years. I live in the forest now and live as close as possible to the natural rhythms of Mother Earth. People up close and personal ~ tax the limits of my endurance because I haven't yet mastered how to turn off their emotional vibrations from my own extremely perceptive antenna. I have changed my mind about the "curse" part although it takes many adjustments to live in harmony among large groups, or at least for me to do it.

It's what we do with this information and these feelings that counts most and often we can help others ~ through knowing ~ what it is they need without them needing to say a word. I can "read" people from my bedroom office and do not need to see anyone in person to do it. Some empaths have turned this gift into big bucks but that would not be possible for me ~ I don't believe you should profit just because you are open, receptive, and kind to others. It just doesn't feel right to me and I am unable to do it.

It's one reason I love to get snowed in ~ snow acts as an additional buffer zone. Natural forests are natural buffer zones. Trees absorb all the negatives from humans as an act of great kindness and assistance to us. We blow carbon dioxycide to them, they give us pure oxygen. A wonderful relationship! We honor each other and prosper.

If even a single car goes down my road, I can describe the "vibe" of whoever is in it whether dark, light, happy or sad and on a few occasions ~ even when they are looking to rob some place. On several occasions i've talked kids out of holding up the local 7-11 or convenience store just by walking by their car and picking up their plans and having a little chat with them about it. It's why I work very hard assisting others for ascension. The sooner we can rise ALL of our vibrations up to higher levels ~ the more I may be able to go out and live among the people again at least for a visit. Until then, I just use my gifts to uplift as many as possible from here and let it go at that.

Invocations and attunements from the Archangels and Ascended Masters are the best way to find relief if you are an empath having disconnect problems with your gifts. I have them all if anyone feels the need for some just email me: wd40dry@gmail.com or PM me on Avalon. We need to form groups like Empaths United or something helpful to learn to deal with our gifts more effectively. It is especially important now that we are able to "activate" many of our DNA strands and as we do this, it will bring even more gifts forth to deal with and the new ones are far more complex than empathy. Such exciting times! Much love! xoxoxox

[pilotsimone]

I feel grateful to be an empath. Being able to read the intentions of people has kept me safe down here. I never wonder who is out of integrity, I feel it instantly.

[edina]

Hi, SEAM thanks for posting this!!!!

There are indeed unique challenges to empathy, however, I wouldn't trade it for the world, life is so much richer for it.

I also wanted to offer heartfelt empathy for the loss of your best friend. That is a big void in your life. Look for your friend to connect with you in subtle ways now. Love transcends the boundaries of realms.

[Carmen]

We all function in different levels of vibration, of consciousness. And until we learn how to be in charge of our own consciousness/vibration we are very much affected by the vibrations of other people and situations. We, as spiritual beings on the journey of evolution, are empathic. As we take down the barriers, take down the grid of conditioning and control,we are like babes newborn soaking up experience. This can be a very vulnerable tricky time for us. So, time alone, time in nature if we can organize that is very beneficial.

As we progress, evolve spiritually, our energy field grows and this affords us protection from lower vibrations. We are still empathetic but we are not brought down by low energy fields or negative attacks. We start to be generators of higher vibrations and we affect the energies around us. The higher vibrations of love that we are now generating affects those around us in amazing ways. And as Inelia says we just have to look. No comment, no judgement.
L

[noxon medem]

So, I am now truely lost for words
If possible, these images speak aloud

8297

8298

8299

8300

8301


be well, all
(and you too)

:)



:fish2:
nm

[unicorny]

Thanks for posting this and to everyone for sharing
I never imagined empathy to be anything but a gift however having read some of these posts I can see that it can also have a profound negative effect on some
thanks

[58andfixed]

You're not crazy!




Prezactly! Just uncommon.

Being connected generates the consequences of empathy, caring, understating & the beatitudes.

Being disconnected is simply denial -- a river in Egypt ! A temporary choice that leads to many cognitive dissonances.

It may feel like pain in the short term, however it just means that those that have empathy have a shorter distance to travel to understanding.

As a civilization, no solution will be capable of circumventing understanding.

- 58

[pharoah21]

When I was a young boy, my empathy was quite overwhelming. I always recall walking in the streets with my dad. He's about 6'1 and used to be a body builder, he was like my superhero. He had an extremely aggressive and negative energy to him though, as a result of all the racism at the time. Whenever he would have a confrontation with someone, I could feel it, before I could see it. The feeling I had used to scare me to bits.

I am still very empathetic but I realise now that I've blocked out a lot of it. It's hard to work in the city and still stay empathetic, walking by every homeless person is a bit torturous. I don't know how to do it. I need to be like Darla and just move out into the woods, I crave that a lot, but I'm a diabetic, and I gotta have the money to pay for my meds. I'm just holding out till the magic date in 2012.......

Thankyou for your thread :p

[olgraybear]

Firstly, I want to thank you for bringing this point to light and I want to give thanks to all who have contributed and were interested enough to at least read this thread.

I wish to tell you if I may, that from my perspective and point of view, you are "spot on" as I have heard from some of my very dear and wonderful British connections.

Everything you have pointed out, brought up and recognized is wonderful, and I believe that there are so many folks experienceing the same things.

I would like to tell all, please do not shy away, hide it or block it out if at all possible. This experience is truly indeed wonderful, and once recognized, felt and then used in a practical application, call it controlled if you must, it becomes an even greater experience,

So, finally my next point to you is, if you think this stage and level your experiencing is wonderful, the next one is even better.

Enjoy,

with much love to all,
Mike

[Carmody]

When I was a young boy, my empathy was quite overwhelming. I always recall walking in the streets with my dad. He's about 6'1 and used to be a body builder, he was like my superhero. He had an extremely aggressive and negative energy to him though, as a result of all the racism at the time. Whenever he would have a confrontation with someone, I could feel it, before I could see it. The feeling I had used to scare me to bits.

I am still very empathetic but I realise now that I've blocked out a lot of it. It's hard to work in the city and still stay empathetic, walking by every homeless person is a bit torturous. I don't know how to do it. I need to be like Darla and just move out into the woods, I crave that a lot, but I'm a diabetic, and I gotta have the money to pay for my meds. I'm just holding out till the magic date in 2012.......

Thankyou for your thread :p

I live on the edge of the given city I am at, I'm no good with living in them.

[pharoah21]

When I was a young boy, my empathy was quite overwhelming. I always recall walking in the streets with my dad. He's about 6'1 and used to be a body builder, he was like my superhero. He had an extremely aggressive and negative energy to him though, as a result of all the racism at the time. Whenever he would have a confrontation with someone, I could feel it, before I could see it. The feeling I had used to scare me to bits.

I am still very empathetic but I realise now that I've blocked out a lot of it. It's hard to work in the city and still stay empathetic, walking by every homeless person is a bit torturous. I don't know how to do it. I need to be like Darla and just move out into the woods, I crave that a lot, but I'm a diabetic, and I gotta have the money to pay for my meds. I'm just holding out till the magic date in 2012.......

Thankyou for your thread :p

I live on the edge of the given city I am at, I'm no good with living in them.


Citys were not exactly built by, or designed for, empaths. It's no wonder it's a tough place for us.

[Carmody]

When I was a young boy, my empathy was quite overwhelming. I always recall walking in the streets with my dad. He's about 6'1 and used to be a body builder, he was like my superhero. He had an extremely aggressive and negative energy to him though, as a result of all the racism at the time. Whenever he would have a confrontation with someone, I could feel it, before I could see it. The feeling I had used to scare me to bits.

I am still very empathetic but I realise now that I've blocked out a lot of it. It's hard to work in the city and still stay empathetic, walking by every homeless person is a bit torturous. I don't know how to do it. I need to be like Darla and just move out into the woods, I crave that a lot, but I'm a diabetic, and I gotta have the money to pay for my meds. I'm just holding out till the magic date in 2012.......

Thankyou for your thread :p

I live on the edge of the given city I am at, I'm no good with living in them.


Citys were not exactly built by, or designed for, empaths. It's no wonder it's a tough place for us.

City living affects brain structure



Researchers have discovered that two areas of the brain are directly affected by city living, leading to a greater risk of anxiety and mood disorders.

It was already known that city living is associated with poorer mental health - but not how or why. The new study provides some clues.

"The risk for anxiety disorders is 21 percent higher for people from the city, who also have a 39 percent increase for mood disorders," says co-author Jens Pruessner, a researcher at McGill's Douglas Mental Health University Institute in Montreal.

"In addition, the incidence for schizophrenia is almost doubled for individuals who are born and brought up in cities. These values are a cause for concern and determining the biology behind this is the first step to remedy the trend."

The team looked at the brain activity of healthy volunteers from urban and rural areas. In a series of functional magnetic resonance (fMRI) experiments, they showed that city living was associated with greater stress responses in the amygdala, an area of the brain involved with emotional regulation and mood.

An urban upbringing was also found to be associated with activity in the cingulate cortex, a region involved in regulation of negative affect and stress.

"These findings suggest that different brain regions are sensitive to the experience of city living during different times across the lifespan," says Pruessner.

"Future studies need to clarify the link between psychopathology and these affects in individuals with mental disorders."

Interestingly, it didn't seem to make much difference whether individuals lived in a concrete jungle or a city with a lot of green space. The implication is that it's population density, rather than any other factor, which causes the changes in the brain.

Almost 70 percent of the world population is epxected to live in a city by 2050, according to United Nations projections.

[13th Warrior]

Empathy felt and understood becomes emotional intelligence...some have higher EI IQ than others...intelligence is more constructive when tempered with wisdom.

[Tony]

Empathy is a natural human instinct. Animals are able to do this as well. To be able to empathise with how some else feels, we therefore modify any selfish behaviour to see a situation from their position, is to care.

The so-called elite cannot empathise. So there are no limitations to their selfish actions. They cannot see things from others points of view.

Maybe this is spiritual aspect or it could be in the DNA. Anyway it can be developed.

Empathy is a blessing, and you know you are on the right road. It is not a thing that you can claim for yourself, that is not empathy!

Be aware, claiming empathy for yourself will cause you much suffering. Note it, deal with it and then drop it.

[SEAM]

Hi, SEAM thanks for posting this!!!!

There are indeed unique challenges to empathy, however, I wouldn't trade it for the world, life is so much richer for it.

I also wanted to offer heartfelt empathy for the loss of your best friend. That is a big void in your life. Look for your friend to connect with you in subtle ways now. Love transcends the boundaries of realms.

Thank You!!! I told his wife and 2 girls, "I want to take your pain away, but I don't know how" He has been with me every day since he died on Fathers Day... right now in fact!

[edina]

Hi, SEAM thanks for posting this!!!!

There are indeed unique challenges to empathy, however, I wouldn't trade it for the world, life is so much richer for it.

I also wanted to offer heartfelt empathy for the loss of your best friend. That is a big void in your life. Look for your friend to connect with you in subtle ways now. Love transcends the boundaries of realms.

Thank You!!! I told his wife and 2 girls, "I want to take your pain away, but I don't know how" He has been with me every day since he died on Fathers Day... right now in fact!

This is beautiful SEAM!!. Thanks for sharing this. It is hard, too, when you feel the pain of the others, I can so identify with wanting to take their pain away. Often, just your presence and your understanding is the best, it is a gift to offer our presence to another, to simply be with them in their pain. And then, for you to be able to share of yourself the way you did, to let them know this, .... you are a good friend, I feel honored you have shared yourself, and the continuity of your friendship, in this way, with his wife and girls, and with us here at Avalon!!!!

May radiant beauty and grace dance with you this day.

[SEAM]

I always thought my wife was a bit self centered in this regard... but now I know, that I am over sensitive..and she is the norm... I'll go easier on my wife now, and I'm thankful for now knowing the difference. I liked what Darla said, in re: I love it down here in FL, when we have a rainy day, so I can stay behind my barricade.. but I disagree with the addict/alcohol distinction. I think those sensitives are just anesthetizing the pain. Many thanks for all your contributions!

[Mike Gorman]

Like a lot of aspects to this existence lark, it is a matter of Degree..I think empathy used to be called 'having a good heart',
being able to truly visualize the circumstances and actual feelings of another creature. For some folks for whom feeling too much becomes painful,
narcotic and alcoholic addictions are often the route taken-I'm almost certain that many addicts and alcoholics start out life as profoundly empathic,
their nervous system is very close to the skin;-so yeah, it can be a curse-: but society is not any good without empathic people-I do not think Nazis valued this very much ( :-(
Interesting thread, loved reading the posts...

[SEAM]

It just occurred to me that when society grieves the loss of a famous person - Princes Diana, John Kennedy, Jr., perhaps the sensitive empaths are following a herd mentality in grieving.
I know, I am often at a loss as to why I feel bad when someone I recognize, yet don't know personally, dies. I have often asked myself... why am I sad? I don't know these people. Maybe, I'm sad because so many others are sad... infinitum.... 100th Monkey...Holographic universe... interesting... Where is Inelia when you need her? I think the Gaia thread as well as some others from Bill and her, speak to this phenom... albeit tiptoeing around it.

[SEAM]

WOW.. Thom Hartman.. on the radio just now said the National debt, and to a degree, wars, are due to a country (the US) with too much Empathy! If that doesn't speak to the Curse side...