U.S. Cancels Regular Drone Strikes on Saturdays (Andy Borowitz)

[Kryztian]

The New Yorker
Online Only

The Borowitz Report

February 7, 2013
U.S. Cancels Regular Drone Strikes on Saturdays

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/02/us-cancels-regular-drone-strikes-on-saturdays.html

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Citing budgetary concerns, the United States announced today that it would discontinue regular Saturday drone strikes on U.S. citizens, beginning in 2014.

In announcing the decision, the White House spokesman Jay Carney acknowledged that the cutback in drone service was “bound to be controversial.” “In the United States, we’ve always prided ourselves on our ability to target our citizens with drone strikes, Monday through Saturday, regardless of the weather,” he said. “We know that losing Saturday drone service is going to take some getting used to.”

But the move to cut back drone service drew sharp criticism from a longtime defender of the program, the former Vice-President Dick Cheney. “Like most Americans, I thought I’d never see the day when drones just up and take Saturdays off,” he said. “This would never be happening if I were still President.”

As if to silence critics, Mr. Carney assured reporters that drones could “still get the job done” Monday through Friday, and reminded U.S. citizens to update the government on any change of address so the drones would know where to reach them.

[bogeyman]

Power politics rather than practicality, it seems. The drone strikes may just become classified.

[Calz]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Citing budgetary concerns, the United States announced today that it would discontinue regular Saturday drone strikes on U.S. citizens, beginning in 2014.

Best laugh o dah day ... about something *not* funny which can mean only one thing ... my tinfoil hat ain't cuttin' it ...


http://nadeltanz.com/images/drone.jpg


http://assets.diylol.com/hfs/8be/5c0/d60/resized/meme-meme-generator-i-don-t-always-wear-tin-foil-hat-but-when-i-do-i-smear-peanutbutter-allover-myself-e2b040.jpg

[PurpleLama]

Andy Borowitz (born January 4, 1958) is an American comedian

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andy_Borowitz

Spoof.

[MorningSong]

This appears to be a satyric play on the US Postal Service announcing that it will discontinue it's delivery of mail on Saturdays..... but not delivery of packages because of the increase in internet commerce.... hoping to save 2 billion dollars a year and that it has 20 billion dollars of debt to come up with within the next 10 years.... not that funny, IMO, but I have a weird sense of humor.... hahahahha!

[Calz]

This appears to be a satyric play on the US Postal Service announcing that it will discontinue it's delivery of mail on Saturdays..... but not delivery of packages because of the increase in internet commerce.... hoping to save 2 billion dollars a year and that it has 20 billion dollars of debt to come up with within the next 10 years.... not that funny, IMO, but I have a weird sense of humor.... hahahahha!

Yep ... not planned to kick in until August.

Hey ... if the biggest problem us yanks have by August is no Saturday mail delivery then life will be good :nod:

[Kryztian]

Thanks Morningsong. I forget that the majority of Avalonians are not from the U.S. and should not see as quickly that this is a spoof, so I just posted this as straight news hoping to give people a laugh. (Some comic relief is need in light of the depressing news that my government is betraying it's once great values.)

[johnf]

I like his style. Especially the address update request from Americans.

[ExomatrixTV]

~I highly recommend a NwoSatire Forum section on projectavalon

[aranuk]

Thanks Morningsong. I forget that the majority of Avalonians are not from the U.S. and should not see as quickly that this is a spoof, so I just posted this as straight news hoping to give people a laugh. (Some comic relief is need in light of the depressing news that my government is betraying it's once great values.)

Hi Kriztian, where can we find how many members are from a certain country? I have often wondered. Or are you just guesstigating here?

Stan

[Dennis Leahy]

~I highly recommend a NwoSatire Forum section on projectavalonYES! This goes back to the idea of laughing AT them. A different kind of "energy bomb" rather than 'love n' light' or even hatred. Mocking and ridiculing their self-serving insanity to humanity and the ecosphere - in the face of the reality that we are all connected. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. Whatever negativity they attempt to direct outward and away from them lands sqarely on all of us - including them! hahahahahah They are such dorks!

Dennis

[ExomatrixTV]

NwoSatire (http://youtube.com/NwoSatire) on youtube, quote:

"~yes, I am Anti-NWO, having fun is the most important tactical move. Anyone who lost their sense of humor become rigid, easy to frustrate & above all counter-productive (ineffective). First sign of a cult-behavior is, that they do NOT have a sense of humor. If you fight injustice 24/7, 7 days/week you already lost because you forget to enjoy life as well. Those who thought-police others are replacing NWO-Tyranny with their own tyranny. When Freedom Radiates Truth Resonates Tyranny Falls."

unquote

~overview videos (latest): http://www.youtube.com/user/nwosatire/videos?view=0
(most popular): http://www.youtube.com/user/nwosatire/videos?flow=grid&sort=p&view=0

[Calz]

NwoSatire (http://youtube.com/NwoSatire) on youtube, quote:

"~yes, I am Anti-NWO, having fun is the most important tactical move. Anyone who lost their sense of humor become rigid, easy to frustrate & above all counter-productive (ineffective). First sign of a cult-behavior is, that they do NOT have a sense of humor. If you fight injustice 24/7, 7 days/week you already lost because you forget to enjoy life as well. Those who thought-police others are replacing NWO-Tyranny with their own tyranny. When Freedom Radiates Truth Resonates Tyranny Falls."

unquote

~overview videos (latest): http://www.youtube.com/user/nwosatire/videos?view=0
(most popular): http://www.youtube.com/user/nwosatire/videos?flow=grid&sort=p&view=0


Agree 100% (... more if it was mathematically possible http://www.pic4ever.com/images/laie_14.gif )