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8th November 2013, 17:22
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The 50 Stupidest Laws Across the World

Letís face it ó America owns the world (or at least we should and would if everyone would stop fussing). Given that America has already shown the ability to govern with complete and utter intelligence in every law it has passed at home, it must be said that the world is following our lead in that regard. Governing systems may differ, but stupidity is universal. The following 50 laws are evidence that we, as a planet, can create some pretty stupid laws to comply with.

ďGovernment's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.Ē

We live in a global economy, but that doesnít mean business is good everywhere. Donít sell your watermelons in Rio Claro, Brazil, where itís illegal. If you use your watermelons to flavor bubble gum, donít plan on selling that, either, in Singapore. The Maldives hates Christ so much you canít sell bibles, and Japan hates healthy people so much you canít use a Vicks inhaler. At least you can buy a television in South Africa, so long as you have a license.

These all make Sweden a scion of liberal economics, where itís legal to sell prostitution; people just canít buy it. Not to be outdone, Finland has a candy tax, but donít expect cookies to be levied when your water is.

In homage to the gulags, Russia requires that you be willing to work 16 hours a day or face imprisonment. This work ethic is needed in Israel, where operating an illegal radio station for five years will make it legal. Probably wonít go over so well in the Netherlands, though, since productivity-killing cannabis is legal to smoke in public ... but tobacco is not.

ďMan does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.Ē

Women and men have always had testy relationships, especially across the globe. The United Arab Emirates doesnít allow them to kiss in public, keeping displays of affection restricted to all those fancy new buildings. Saudi Arabia goes one step farther by preventing public flirting ... by preventing men from walking dogs. Swaziland wonít even let young women shake hands with older men, because everyone knows thatís how pedophiles identify their prey. Proving theyíre a world leader in gynecology, Bahrain only allows male doctors to examine female genitals using a mirror.

In Cali, Columbia, a bride may only examine her husbandís genitals during sex and her mother must witness it the first time. Samoa still defends chivalry by making it illegal for men to forget their wives' birthdays. In Hong Kong, women may kill their cheating husbands with their bare hands just to show that cheating will not be tolerated. At least Argentina nips marital problems in the bud by prohibiting men from marrying their brothers, and India nips cross-dressing in the bud by prohibiting Barbie from being dressed in Ken clothing.

ď'Tis healthy to be sick sometimes.Ē

Henry David Thoreau has obviously never been to Indonesia then, because one of the most unhealthy things you can do is masturbate. Youíll be decapitated if youíre found out. In Las Vegas this might be quite an exciting law with widespread support, because in Mongolia women must walk around with their breasts exposed. At least China has stringent entrance exams for their universities. A prerequisite is that you must be intelligent.

Peeing in public is something that might get you in trouble at a tailgate, but if youíre pregnant in England you can relieve yourself anywhere you want ó even in a police helmet if you request. At least in Scotland youíll be forewarned because youíre required to allow anyone who knocks on your door use of the loo. However, donít do it in the ocean while in Portugal where itís illegal, or after 10 p.m. in Switzerland where you canít flush the toilet.

ďThe finest clothing made is a person's own skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this.Ē

That is not always the case, after all. This is why Italy makes it illegal for obese people to wear polyester. This is probably why people from the American South donít travel to the boot all that often. The Isle of Capri doesnít want you wearing noisy sandals around. Thatís alright in Barcelona, Spain, though, but wearing your bathing suit away from the beach isnít. At least you can be a male belly dancer, because Egypt prohibits that kind of thing. Even Athens, Greece, allows for your license to be revoked if a policeman notice youíre not properly dressed or bathed (which, incidentally, would help alleviate poor traffic if actually enforced).

I donít get whatís with the Mediterranean. Thailand actually seems normal, because all they require is that you wear underwear when leaving the house.

ďAll animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.Ē

If youíre from France, youíve probably never read that before. Pigs cannot be named Napolean. Norway really takes that to heart where female dogs and cats cannot be spayed (but male animals are happily neutered). Lebanon, too, because you can get in big trouble for having sex with a male animal, but strangely not with a female. Romania doesnít like Mickey Mouse, either. He was banned in 1935 because of fears that he would frighten children.

British Columbia, Canada doesnít let you go hunting for Sasquatch. Should he make a trip Down Under you can, though, so long as you donít intend to eat him. Australia doesnít let you kill animals with a name.

ďThe government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.Ē

Nowhere is government more of a problem creator than traffic laws. South Korea requires bribes for traffic cops to be reported, because that stops it from happening. Just like accidents are prevented in Belgium by saying that oncoming traffic has the right away unless the driver slows or stops. See a government motorcade in Zimbabwe? Donít give it the finger, because offensive gestures are strictly prohibited.

Gun control isnít a discussion saved for America, either. In an ode to gun rights activists, Paraguay allows you to duel so long as you and your challenger are blood donors. Gun control proponents will be happy to know water guns cannot be used during New Yearís celebrations in Cambodia.

Ireland specifically bans blasphemy. Should you not be blasphemer in Tibet, your reincarnation is ensured so long as you register first with a government agency. It wonít help your karma to be in Mexico City, Mexico, because you cannot tell people to ďhave a nice day.Ē However, Bangladesh is looking out for you because cheating on school exams is strictly illegal.

Should your karma bless you with good running skills, donít plan on competing in Iceland, because running your 26 mile trek in less than 3 hours, 30 minutes is illegal. Maybe you can come back as an administrative assistant in Germany, because at least youíll have a nice window to look out in your office. By law, all offices must have a view of the sky.


8th November 2013, 17:50
John Stossel - Illegal Everything


8th November 2013, 18:40
I once read a legal stipulation specifying it was now illegal to send children by postal mail (obviously that was in another century).

8th November 2013, 18:44
I once read a legal stipulation specifying it was now illegal to send children by postal mail (obviously that was in another century).

LOL, thats a good one!

8th November 2013, 18:57
Henry David Thoreau has obviously never been to Indonesia then, because one of the most unhealthy things you can do is masturbate.

This stood out for me. Elaboration please?

8th November 2013, 19:07
Henry David Thoreau has obviously never been to Indonesia then, because one of the most unhealthy things you can do is masturbate.

This stood out for me. Elaboration please?

LOL, I imagine he reflected on it somewhere in his writings!