I'm feeling threatened. (I hope to be reunited with my mother)

[F.M.v.Keulen]

I"m a Dutch person. I am not so well, my English is not so well.
I"ve lost my mother. She was the only parent that I've gotten to know
and love, of the two, which number would have been better.
I am a rather insignificant person, maybe not in a negative way, that I could still call myself insignificant.
Exposed, I might not have been able to escape a bad destiny.
I am F.M.v.Keulen, was born in Capelle aan den IJssel, Netherlands, 30-10-1957.

MY mother's name was: Diena (Boon-) van Keulen, born: Wijhe, Netherlands, 24-09-1920.
I hope to be able to be reunited with my mother, that I have seen alive, several times, after she had been reported dead to me, 11 years ago. I probably suffer from agorafobia, and if there wouldn't have been other people than just my mother and me, then I would, I think have been able to renew our contact again and find out more of my mother's where-abouts and I might have left this place where I already try to live for more than 10 years, Apeldoorn, Netherlands, for instance Stationsstraat 30/32, 7311NT
My recent telephonenumber is +3**********, my emailaddress: f***@gmail.com

===

[ Mod-edit: I edited out a couple of details which provided more personal detail of the poster, F.M.v.Keulen, than should usually be posted on a public Web forum. If someone does desire to contact F.M.v.Keulen, let any one of the forum moderators know, and they can recover and provide these details. -- Thanks, Paul. ]

[Foxie Loxie]

So sorry to hear you have lost your Mother! That is a void that can never be filled, however, you are NOT an insignificant person! :bigsmile

Think of it this way....we are beings of pure consciousness temporarily inhabiting physical bodies! That you have seen your Mother again bears that out! She is STILL with you!! LOVE is ALL!!

[mgray]

I am sorry to hear of your plight. And you are in my prayers.

However if I were you I would not put so much individual information out on the web. Even here on Avalon, you just never know.

Perhaps one of the mods could edit out certain data.

[Agape]

Fred , this is not a great idea believe me. I had very close relationship with my mum and cared for her for many years since she had couple of medical conditions and she was bright individual and great friend in need, and passed away almost 3 years ago, accidentally and almost prematurely.
It never made sense to me she’s not here anymore and it took me some inner work to convince myself of that being a fact.
At least twice I was tempted to go to town around place that she mentioned long ago as place of secret meeting..guess what , nothing has happened .

Of course I can kind of feel her presence sometimes but it’s the same part of brain that listened to her voice, for hours. It’s not more than that. Also ‘seeing a person’ should be subjected to thorough analysis for you need to ask, what kind of Mother are you looking for ?
The one when you were baby ? The one you remember as a child ? Or the person who she turned to in different stages of your adulthood?

As spiritual entity, wouldn’t she look quite differently now? And is it meaningful looking for that entity at physical places ?

Are you looking for human entity or spiritual one ?


One thing I would humbly suggest is that she’d probably would not want you to post your phone number and email in open, these days.

You don’t need your mother now, you’re not a baby but you may need someone as kind as your mother was. Grieving comes and goes but don’t get attached to invisible entity since you are part of this world. No one is insignificant and I bet sure someone out there needs you as partner, father or grandfather.

Make a genuine effort to find your true self. Enjoy your sovereignty . Be kind to others. Your Mother is within you of all things. Don’t search outside. Look within and let her come through and extend her hand to someone else ..you’ll see her clearly if that’s what you wish for.

In good deed ..

[ThePythonicCow]

Posted by mgray (here)
I am sorry to hear of your plight. And you are in my prayers.

However if I were you I would not put so much individual information out on the web. Even here on Avalon, you just never know.

Perhaps one of the mods could edit out certain data.

Good idea, mgray. I edited out a couple of details, as I just now noted in a Mod-edit footnote to the opening post. Thanks.

¤=[Post Update]=¤

Posted by Agape (here)
One thing I would humbly suggest is that she’d probably would not want you to post your phone number and email in open, these days.

Agreed .

[Flash]

As far as i see it, i think you should edit much more Paul, the adress, the dates of birth, etc. He is quite exposing himself for an agoraphobic.

I am sorry Fred that you feel so bad. Please go get some help for the agoraphobia, with good therapist, it is quite easy to treat. You must have some social help somehow, somewhere, in the Netherlands.

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by Agape (here)
Fred , this is not a great idea believe me. I had very close relationship with my mum and cared for her for many years since she had couple of medical conditions and she was bright individual and great friend in need, and passed away almost 3 years ago, accidentally and almost prematurely.
It never made sense to me she’s not here anymore and it took me some inner work to convince myself of that being a fact.
At least twice I was tempted to go to town around place that she mentioned long ago as place of secret meeting..guess what , nothing has happened .

Of course I can kind of feel her presence sometimes but it’s the same part of brain that listened to her voice, for hours. It’s not more than that. Also ‘seeing a person’ should be subjected to thorough analysis for you need to ask, what kind of Mother are you looking for ?
The one when you were baby ? The one you remember as a child ? Or the person who she turned to in different stages of your adulthood?

As spiritual entity, wouldn’t she look quite differently now? And is it meaningful looking for that entity at physical places ?

Are you looking for human entity or spiritual one ?


One thing I would humbly suggest is that she’d probably would not want you to post your phone number and email in open, these days.

You don’t need your mother now, you’re not a baby but you may need someone as kind as your mother was. Grieving comes and goes but don’t get attached to invisible entity since you are part of this world. No one is insignificant and I bet sure someone out there needs you as partner, father or grandfather.

Make a genuine effort to find your true self. Enjoy your sovereignty . Be kind to others. Your Mother is within you of all things. Don’t search outside. Look within and let her come through and extend her hand to someone else ..you’ll see her clearly if that’s what you wish for.

In good deed ..

This post is extremely wise and mature, offering excellent advice — for any of us.

[Noelle]

I hope I am not reading your OP wrong, but you are saying your mother was reported as dead to you but you have evidence that she may be alive. Are you thinking you may be targeted?

[Valerie Villars]

Lady M, that's the way I read the post yesterday but was unsure so I didn't respond.