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Thread: Why are we lying ?

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    Brazil Avalon Member rogparan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Caliban (here)
    The basis of a deep lasting relationship, with your lover, your closest friends and family is about openness. That doesn't mean you have to tell them everything but without truth it's a waste of time. With others, out there in the world, why should we tell them the truth--if they can use it against us?
    the final question it's what I said (post # 6) about "nature competition" (they can use it against us)
    the (openness) counterpart of nature competition, it's the (inteligent) idea about "nature cooperation".

    many competitions, as a matter of fact, can be part of evolutionary cooperations, if you could see the whole process involved

    but I think the point of this thread, it's about the (Start) Intention cause, as it a malicious (lie) or a kind of ingenuity surrounded by doubts.

    ethically, it's very different a naive and well intentioned perception of reality (here and now), rather than a expert bad intentioned perception of the (temporary) ingenuity of others (that I would like reinforce here also using the term Ignorance).

    For further thought pourposes, I leave a tip:
    - the competition always have a finished with one winner, but the cooperations always goes ahead with everyone winnering (or at least with nobody losing) !
    Last edited by rogparan; 1st September 2019 at 14:52. Reason: clarity
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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by East Sun (here)
    Sometimes it's better to not tell someone that their Father or Mother committed suicide to prevent pain.
    Actually — although I've never been close to any kind of dreadful situation like that — I'm not quite so sure. I mentioned above that all lies lead to another problem... whatever the lie is.

    Imagine the possible sense of hurt and betrayal when the person eventually funds out the truth... as they very probably might.

    The same applies to other deeply sensitive issues, like whether someone's been adopted or not. Or (maybe) even something like finding that the child you thought you'd fathered wasn't actually yours.

    The truth does set you free, though it can certainly be tough and difficult when crawling through that razor fence in the mud. I'd suggest — though these clumsy words might not show the sensitivity I appreciate is always there — that denying someone the truth may sometimes be a little demeaning, condescending, distrusting, and even arrogantly controlling.

    I don't think we've really ever got the right to manipulate another person like that — even if we convince ourselves we're trying to be 'kind'.

    It can be one's OWN fear that one's trying to self-medicate. Not real, genuine concern for the person one's told the 'white lie' to.
    Last edited by Bill Ryan; 1st September 2019 at 14:42.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    O donna, do you mean in the sense that art at its root inception is an unnatural occurrence and or creation? only existing by intent by we humans?

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    That is one way to put it, thepainterdoug.

    Art has intent beyond its inception. A tree is not just a tree.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Most people will lie in order to get something they want, without believing in their own lies.

    But there are persons who belong to the group pathological liars. Unlike telling the occasional white lie to avoid hurting someone’s feelings or getting in trouble, they seem to lie for no apparent reason. They will lie consistently and continually in large fantastical ways that can make it obvious to others that they are lying. Yet the pathological liar will believe his own lies and recreate his own reality.

    And then you have those suffering from narcissistic personality disorders and borderline personality disorders who also believe in their own lies, but on a more unconscious level. They do not want to be honest with themselves, so they change the way that they think to fit with their lies. They often tell themselves and others that everybody loves them even though they do not. They want to believe it, so they say it.

    I actually don’t know exactly where the first one (pathological liar) ends and the other one (narcissist) begins.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
    Quote Posted by East Sun (here)
    Sometimes it's better to not tell someone that their Father or Mother committed suicide to prevent pain.
    Actually — although I've never been close to any kind of dreadful situation like that — I'm not quite so sure. I mentioned above that all lies lead to another problem... whatever the lie is.

    Imagine the possible sense of hurt and betrayal when the person eventually funds out the truth... as they very probably might.

    The same applies to other deeply sensitive issues, like whether someone's been adopted or not. Or (maybe) even something like finding that the child you thought you'd fathered wasn't actually yours.

    The truth does set you free, though it can certainly be tough and difficult when crawling through that razor fence in the mud. I'd suggest — though these clumsy words might not show the sensitivity I appreciate is always there — that denying someone the truth may sometimes be a little demeaning, condescending, distrusting, and even arrogantly controlling.

    I don't think we've really ever got the right to manipulate another person like that — even if we convince ourselves we're trying to be 'kind'.

    It can be one's OWN fear that one's trying to self-medicate. Not real, genuine concern for the person one's told the 'white lie' to.
    When I was in second grade, I found out the woman I called "mom" was my step-mother and that my birth-mom had died when I was two years old. I am still resentful to this fact and especially the way I found out, today. What you said is 100% true as I now do it with my own daughter, who knows but keeps up the charade to spare my feelings.
    Last edited by RogueEllis; 1st September 2019 at 17:12.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    This is a fascinating topic. What Deux Corbeaux brought up really gets into murky waters. One group knows they're lying but does it because that's their game--that's their MO, they get off on creating these webs of lies, it's a power thing and an obsession, a conscious one. The Iago phenomenon. I wonder though, how "conscious" it is for them. Or has it simply become the warp (no pun intended) and woof of their lives?

    Others perhaps, the borderline and narcissistic types, do it from an unconscious basis. I'm trying to imagine what that's like. It seems like it's an absence of conscience, even an absence of awareness of that absence. That's a very strange state to be in.

    Most people lie to protect themselves or loved ones. But the cases above paint a totally difference picture of reality. One wonders about the events we call hoaxes or false flags. Those who participate, who plan these--what category do they go in?

    Funny, because I'm in the middle of watching a very long Japanese movie, translated as "Happy Hour." One of the main themes seems to be lying and the omission of facts. For example, in a group of four women friends, one woman expresses hurt a few times because another women in the group told one of them about an important issue in her life, but not all of them. She took it as a lie, but another women, who also wasn't told, accepted it as her decision to tell only one of them, particularly since those two were longer term friends.

    There are many shades and variations to lying and dissimulating. Some therapists, I believe I've read this, say it's not always beneficial to a marriage to confess an affair that happened and is over. So does the truth always set one free?

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Habitual lying can escalate, and escalate, but eventually it can come full-circle - and bite you in the @ss!

    A short tale to illustrate an example. This was before cell phones and facebook, when you had to talk to your friends to find out what was happening in their lives rather than knowing instantly and automatically with the press of a button.

    When I was a younger bloke, I dated a real beauty. I loved her to bits. We'll call her Mel. For a time we were very happy (for me it was the happiest I ever was). Sadly, it didn't last. Let's just say Mel came to be...'liberal' with her sleeping arrangements. Lies were told (by her) to cover those betrayals, but the truth was eventually disclosed (by a third party), and hearts were broken (mine), etc, etc. It ended in tears (again mine), and that was the end of that. Lesson learned.

    A while later, I came to befriend a guy who happened to now be dating Mel. We'll call him Jim. No problem, for me it was in the past. I'd moved on. Jim knew I had dated Mel for a while, but I didn't tell him much about my time with her, because I, after all, was still friends with Mel (platonically), and I wasn't about to bad-mouth her to him. So in a sense, I lied for her. Which may sound strange to some people. Why would I protect the girl who treated me so badly? Well for one, her love life was not my business anymore. Secondly, and call me a sap, I didn't think it was the right thing to do. It would've torpedoed her new relationship before it had even got going.

    Anyway, a short while later again, a few weeks I think, I heard from Mel in passing that she was now dating a guy called Rob, and he was awesome, she was really into him, and it was going well. When I next encountered Jim, a few days later, I immediately consoled him, mentioned Rob in an off-handed way, her new boyfriend, and asked him what had happened, although I guessed easily enough. He looked at me aghast. "Rob? Who the f**k is Rob?"

    Jim and Mel were still together, they'd never broken up at all. To Jim everything was going great, and he had no knowledge of Rob.

    When I got home, I received the phonecall I knew was coming. A distraught and absolutely furious Mel. Her relationship with Jim was now in tatters, he'd dumped her, and all because I had opened my big mouth! My response was simple. How was I to know Rob was a secret fling, how was I supposed to keep track of all her lies? She stopped sobbing and swearing at me at that point, and over the next 10 minutes came to a frightening conclusion, one she hadn't at all considered. It wasn't my fault, or Jim's fault, or Rob's fault, or the world's fault. It was all her fault. She lied her way through life, and through men, and because of it she'd lost Jim, who, according to her (and I had no reason to disbelieve her this time), was the love of her life.

    They never got back together, and Rob, 'the fling', soon faded away. But I'm still friends with her to this day, but don't ask me about her love life, because funnily enough, it's complicated!
    "When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace."
    ~ Jimi Hendrix

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Caliban (here)
    There are many shades and variations to lying and dissimulating. Some therapists, I believe I've read this, say it's not always beneficial to a marriage to confess an affair that happened and is over. So does the truth always set one free?
    good question -- I bet 2 cents, a good answer is -- The affair that happened "Don't Matters", TO the affair that is happening (here and now)

    If don't matters, needless to say, or even if it does, it shouldn't makes difference to the marrieds, ie, not set one free, by principle.

    BUT, if it makes a difference, it is because the marriage has problems, and the lie here is ...
    -- the use of an irrelevant reason to solve another psychosomatic relevant problem.

    here, in my country, there is a popular saying -- God writes right by crooked lines !

    on my previous post (#21) I told about competition versus cooperation, but I miss to mention that some Cooperative Techs can include a kind of lie, when others don't correspond a pure cooperative stimuli, So, you can deceive them with a little competition, to provoke some (unconscious) cooperation.

    so please, be aware of that .. take in mind that Truth is Relative (and the lies too)
    Last edited by rogparan; 1st September 2019 at 22:47.
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    So, nothing there are here belongs to me.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    By the time you arrive at 80 years old, you have passed through just about everything mentioned above and more, either on the giving or the receiving end. Both have life destroying potential. At 80, you have learned either to keep your mouth shut or Sock It To Them Baby!

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by amor (here)
    By the time you arrive at 80 years old, you have passed through just about everything mentioned above and more, either on the giving or the receiving end. Both have life destroying potential. At 80, you have learned either to keep your mouth shut or Sock It To Them Baby!
    Or sit back quietly grinning.

    God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
    Courage to change the things I can,
    And wisdom to know the difference.


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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
    Quote Posted by arborealis (here)
    "She is a liar. She has always been a liar."
    It hit me in my soul.
    Oooooof! I really felt that.



    So sorry that happened. That's the kind of thing that's kind of hard to 'unhear' — once someone's been so crass and insensitive as to actually say it.
    Bill, Thank you. :-) Ironically, she (or it) could see me well. I guess it's as they say, sometimes the truth hurts.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Berate... I didn't know this word, which I read earlier in this thread. Though looked it up and I can relate. I strive not to lie, though still catch myself doing it. It disappoints me every time. What I notice mostly in myself is I lie mostly to protect my feelings. I recognize I anticipate the knowledge and expectation of others and when I think it could turn into disapproval by the other, or a disappointment or a confrontation, then I sometimes choose to avoid friction and turn what I say into something that I think will be accepted by the other person.

    I'm convinced lying is wrong, in all circumstances. Not lying requires strong communication skills I feel. I need to be able to switch my emotion off, not be afraid of impact and be willing to face there are parts in my life that can be improved, and I should be able to communicate that in honesty.

    That said. I also notice that with some people I don't feel the need to lie, because I know these people are not going to be triggered painfully by what I say, and friction is not anticipated. For me that shows me something important, which I try to give to others: acceptance of circumstances and to not get triggered to react with negativity in any way of form. Though also here strong communication skills are very important, because does it mean you have to approve or condone everything, or be on the same line. No. I feel I have the responsibility to be able to communicate whatever is on my mind in a way that is reasonable and caring from both angles.

    One can ponder about what type of behavior grows this kind of behavior, like lying. If a parent is verbally abusive when a child makes a mistake, what will that result to? The child is learning to communicate, but might not be skilled sufficiently to reply adequately. This could lead to the child wanting to avoid the abuse, and turning to lies as an easy, though crooked, fix. Can you blame the child? I think not. Is it right? I think not. When people in their teens or early twenties have children, are they always skilled in constructive communication? I think not. Can you blame them? I think not. Is it good? I think not. Behavior like lying will jump from generation to generation. To my opinion every person needs to take responsibility for their part and be a good example for the ones around them whether initiator or receiver.

    Do I find it easy? No. Long way to go. I find it's a struggle, but imma keep on working on this, praying to get it right one day.

    [edit: typo strife=strive and removed duplicate]
    Last edited by Words of Joy; 2nd September 2019 at 10:43.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    I think that most lies occur out of fear -as a form of self defence I’d say,
    starting in childhood, we may feel or be in inadequate situation towards authority,
    parents, teachers ,much later of course it can be any sort of authority
    and while we are gullible for breaking “their rules and protocols” number
    of times in soft manner, punishment for doing so can be either way inadequate in that manner, giving them reason to exercise their ego, arrogance or anger
    and we choose not to share either our reasoning( if repeatedly misunderstood) and our errors “with them”.
    Lying in self defence is probably more common, in my opinion than “proactive lying” of people who would qualify as pathological liars,
    strangely enough those people too often start in childhood and they’re sometimes amongst the most charming, adorable and praised people in collective or families, well till they grow up and they still can’t stop telling stories.

    I don’t think that anyone likes to lie as a default or being lied to, is base line.


    There are situations where lying becomes indispensable defence against what we think we can’t conquer at that time.

    Personally, I treasure honesty and truthfulness as kind of golden means, sword that cuts through every ignorance but mastering “the sword of truth” is not easy.

    To teenagers and all kinds of beginners of the “truth process” it can take years
    to learn how not to harm themselves and others with some kind of truth.
    For after all, most of the truth of this world is relative and transient.


    I think that sometimes in life, even the very definition of truth and lie is solely
    an internal conviction of the witness, such as “truths” related to relationships
    in general.
    Some people go very far to get somebody else assessed the way they want them
    to be or the way they see them because of their strong sense of personal aims
    and individuality, for example.

    Reality -the reality- we so call for in higher philosophical sense rarely calls
    us for assessment in fact unless we have or we are ignoring its principles.

    On the other hand we are natural processors of what we call the reality surrounding us . We modify the environment just by being present.

    Whether we modify it a little or a lots it gets registered and the pure fact of our beingness which isn’t a state of status quod but state of processing therefor modifying other living beings reality can be interpreted as a form of “lie” to them

    because we do not all function the same way, have differing chemical and neurological-reactions, different metabolisms etc etc.

    To the other entity in the room( of life) burning flame of a candle( or a soul) may be “white lie” because they got deceived by burning candles and souls in their lives, previously.
    Pretty cloth may be a “white lie” to me seeing many people with outwardly success but out of character.
    Similar is the “white lie” of uniforms, lab coats, monastery robes etc.

    There’s probably nothing in the history of the Universe that did not fall to plagiarism at some point and deceptive symbol of its original meaning.

    So in turn today’s people rarely realise how much lies are surrounding them.


    Personally again, I consider myself truth fighter against all kinds of human deception but to see through all takes much longer than one individual lifetime



    🙏🌟🙏

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by amor (here)
    By the time you arrive at 80 years old, you have passed through just about everything mentioned above and more, either on the giving or the receiving end. Both have life destroying potential. At 80, you have learned either to keep your mouth shut or Sock It To Them Baby!
    Incredible... I just spent a good hour or so thinking about all this and came to the same conclusion. I then open this thread and go to the last post I read and BAM - there's your post, amor. Its good not to feel alone. In fact, this is the number one reason I am glad I found this forum and glad I haven't caused myself not to be welcome and glad I came back (after two "retirements")... not to feel so alone. Apologies for the personal note.

    There's one thing more I have concluded. To think that I have the good judgment and right to actually decide which of the instances of lying of others are either 'completely wrong' or 'perfectly right' at any moment in time in our world as it is today would likely be the real wrong, especially if I did so in a way that I imposed my view on another. The posts I made earlier in this thread may have done just that even though I sued personal experiences to support my judgment. I won't go back and edit them though.

    I (now) simply wish to state that I was expressing frustration as to how things played out in a few specific instances.

    I am 61 and the wisdom of keeping my mouth shut has not yet sunk fully in but I am more and more doing so, so there's hope. When I do actually remain silent, I am usually forcing myself not to Sock It To Them Baby, but I so often want to and even more so, find myself cheering on those who actually do.
    Last edited by Sammy; 2nd September 2019 at 14:09.
    All the above is all and only my opinion - all subject to change and not meant to be true for anyone else regardless of how I phrase it.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    The Invention of Lying. Mark lives in a world where lies simply do not exist. Then one day, he has a brainwave. Fun, with an intriguing concept, a highly recommended film.

    "When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace."
    ~ Jimi Hendrix

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Sammy (here)
    "
    Lies, when the truth actually comes out, always causes more harm than if the truth had always been made available. Always
    I could not agree more, lies always cause more harm then truth ever will. About three years ago I vowed to myself never to lie about anything again, no matter how minor or major. I did not feel I particularly lied a lot it was just that I saw the ramifications of others lying and I did not like what I saw. That said, over the course of the first year I was astonished how much I caught myself lying. It was never anything major. I even caught myself lying about lying. For instance.........I was running late for a meeting. I finally arrived and announced that I was caught in traffic instead (of the truth) saying I got a late start. To me it wasn't really a lie it was simply "an excuse." Now I have come to realize that no excuse/lie is actually necessary. The right way to handle it is................I apologize for being late, I appreciate your patience.

    I was bewildered at how much I actually lied, particularly when no lie was necessary. For instance, someone would call and say that they wanted to stop by. If I didn't want to see them or spend time with them I would almost automatically say I am not going to be home or I have plans for Saturday.
    Now I automatically tell them the truth, I don't feel like seeing anyone today.

    Of course, there have been instances when the truth is much harder to "speak." My daughter (28yo) became very ill, she was in and out of the hospital 4 times before they admitted her for a 16-day stretch. They ran every test under the sun and could not figure out what was wrong. After about 10 days she was asking me what I thought and did I think they would get to the bottom of her illness. She was at a first rate medical facility that I had a very high degree of confidence in but the doctors were absolutely stumped on what was causing her such a grave illness. Before I put myself on the truth road I would have been more optimistic and probably told her that everything was going to be just fine. I found myself choosing my words very carefully and staying honest and upbeat. I did not want to give her false hope when we had no idea how bad or good the outcome was going to be. Fortunately, she is fine now. It turned out she has a very rare stomach bacteria that was almost impossible to detect.

    I have been in other situations where I would not have been as honest as I am now. Such as a friend leaving his wife for a much younger woman after many years of marriage. He asked my opinion and I told him that he should only ask if he was prepared to hear the truth from my perspective. When he said yes I unloaded on him. He was taken back and hurt that I did not support him. The bottom line is that he ended up making a horrible mistake which he now regrets and there is no chance of repairing the damage to his broken marriage. We have remained close friends and I believe he now appreciates the painful truth that I delivered to him. His regret is not that he was told the truth it is that he never really listened to the truth.

    My point is I believe that most of us are not even aware of how often we lie. Most of us think that "white lies" are OK. Our inclination seems to be that it is OK to lie to save someone from being hurt or embarrassed. The truth is.........when we lie no matter the reason and no matter the size of the lie we end up hurting others and ultimately ourselves. Taking an inventory of my 'lies' was one of the best decisions I ever made.

    What we put out in the universe we ultimately get back.
    Last edited by rgray222; 3rd September 2019 at 02:56.

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    Germany Avalon Member Iyakum's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    My post is dedicated to @Slobbe, @Arborealis, @NancyV and @Petra.
    Likewise to all who participated in my thread. Who gave me their experiences. With a respectful thanks to all concerned.

    My personal experience, tells me that even the most honest person on earth will not get along without lies or will get along. Lies are part of our existence. It is an unwritten law, all of us without exception are all subject to it. Lying can cause very severe pain, some have grown up with pain and some have not. Some who suffer or endure such pain try to live with it. But what about those who are not up to such pain? We all know that most of the physical pain can be cured. Except for the pain that is incurable. For those who have to endure such pains of incurability, for those I pray. I myself have suffered severe pain. Through physical torture, when I had to endure the torture, I was still young and with time I have replaced the memory of the pain. Due to my inexperience, childlike mindset, I thought there would be no greater pain than physical torture. But I was taught a much worse. It was followed by the torture of the most extreme pain after the physical torture. I sat in a cell which was estimated 1.50 x 80 cm. When the physical torture did not work, the torture of the soul came. Only I wondered, why do not you believe me? I told them the truth, I'm innocent. Do you want me to lie? Do you want to reach with psychic Follter that I lie? Yes, they wanted that. The mental torture can not endure as much as the physical one. I spoke to God, Jesus, Mary, the Holy Spirit to all who could hear me. I asked what did I do wrong that I have to suffer that? The country I was in was a fundamentalist Islamic country. However, I did not believe in Islam, I am a Christian.


    When I realized that those who interrogated me did not know how to reach them, I was lying. They wanted to hear a lie from me. I sat in my cell and was about to break up. Names were engraved in the wall in front of me. I scratched a cross in the wall, I wrote. I believe in God, in Jesus, in the holy Mary Mother of God and in the Holy Spirit. All this I wrote in German, it was very important to me that I do not lose faith. When I finished my work, I looked at the cross and the inscriptions. I felt an incredibly strong presence that formed around the cross. Only around the cross and the names. A thought, an enlightenment came to my mind. So at first I only drew four lines that ran from the cross in the middle until they were about a meter long. At the ends of the lines I wrote God, Jesus, Mary and the Holy Spirit in the wall. I can not say for sure. But my feeling was sharpened by the torture. Nevertheless, I felt that presence was stronger. My faith became stronger I started praying, I asked questions. Everything will be fine, it was not an answer, it was a feeling, maybe an inspiration. Not only the wall with the cross, the names, the lines, also I started to radiate. I felt a power that is indescribable. Whenever I speak, I receive the same answer. Everything will be fine, you should not lie, the truth comes by itself. Two days later I was taken to the interrogation rooms Despite the permanent blindfold, I knew where I am. One of the guards took me to a slightly larger room. He told me there is a blanket and a pillow, you can sleep. That night I prayed again. I prayed to God to accept me and I do not want to experience the next day. It seemed like the presence gave me a smile. I thanked the presence for the hope. But I decided that God would answer my prayer. I did not want to see the next day. I asked for death. There were words in my head that I could not interpret right away. I lacked experience, but I succeeded. The result was, "you have so much to do here, stop lying to yourself". The next morning, I was released. I did not lie, no lies, only the truth.
    Last edited by Iyakum; 3rd September 2019 at 12:11.
    Iyakum
    All the questions we have, all the answers we are looking for, about the meaning of life. Mother Nature, she has already answered, we just have to read it.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Quote Posted by Iyakum (here)
    Why are we lying?
    I would like to know your experiences, why you think, why we lie? Is lying part of humanity? Is it possible to live without lies? Are there any other reasons besides the ones I enumerate. What is your opinion about this?

    We lie in fear, afraid of what others might learn about us. We are lying because we do not want to hurt someone we love. We lie to protect others, also we lie out of greed, envy, jealousy.

    But every time we lie this fear grows bigger, we lie to ourselves, sometimes so often and over a long time, so that we someday even convinced that the lie was the truth. The more we lie, the more we have to remember the lies, but as everyone knows, the truth comes out at some point.

    Only then what, then we invent a new lie or break everything together? ...
    Cool thread Iyakum! I expect this will be very interesting, because you're talking about something which I expect might not exist any more (far in the future). Lying is something that the human race should not need, as far as I'm concerned.

    Like you said, one reason why people lie is to protect (aka a white lie), and I think lying is a part of humanity for just this reason.

    I imagine it's possible to live without lies, but that would put us at substantial risk!

    Bottom line in my mind is, "We need to be able to lie" - but at some point in the future, this won't be true anymore (wishful thinking, perhaps)

    As for lying to oneself though, there's NEVER good reason for that. People who lie to themselves are just setting themselves up to look like an idiot later on.

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    Default Re: Why are we lying ?

    Let's not forget that "lies" are built into this system. Our very existence in a body is a kind of illusion, a lie, or if you prefer, a temporary reality, not the True reality of who we are.

    Much of what we call wisdom is knowing when to tell the Full truth, shades of the truth, bits and pieces of truth, a total lie -- or just to keep our mouths shut and walk away.

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