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Thread: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

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    Avalon Member NeverMind's Avatar
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    Default Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    I really wouldn't be doing this if the person regarding whom I am asking did not mean so much to me (and for humanity in general).
    I can give advice - and have done so - but outside advice, preferably from people who are in the same predicament (unlikely, as such people are very difficult to find), would be very welcome, for a number of different reasons.

    Here is the problem.
    This person I am talking about is or was a miracle maker. Or maybe a best-scenario-collapser, whatever. :-) I am talking about heavy-duty turn-arounds, improbable or even seemingly "impossible" things happening. This was so ever since this person was a small child.

    This person also has an openness, a sense of empathy that borders on mind-reading and clairvoyance. This is a problem because it seems to have debilitated this person, and eventually it took away her joyful "magic".

    Now, after suffering a series - let's call it an avalanche, it's more accurate - of devastating blows in the past five years, the will - the will of the Heart, that electric current that says, this will be so, end of story - appears to be gone.
    And the reason why it is gone is also clear: person X does not believe any more that nothing bad could ever happen to her or to her loved ones. (Before, she did - even after it seemingly had happened!) This was the corner stone of her power.

    Now,whenever she tries to reignite that old creative spark that had always worked for her before she was drained, the thought of all the horrible things that did happen comes to her mind, and paralyses her will.
    (Not the ordinary "will", mind you; this person is perfectly functional. I am talking about the demiurg's will.)

    Do you, any of you, know of an effective method of reigniting the Will, bypass the feedback od "experience", and avoid self-observing while doing it?

    I can tell you that reasoning - even in esoteric terms - won't help.
    It's as if she had some sort of in-built mechanism now that keeps reminding her of all the terrible things that happened after she allowed herself to be sucked dry of the creative "sap" by her own empathy.
    Not even the memory and awareness of her previous life and "might" helps.

    And please, I am not asking for reasoning why this might even be good for her (the "Ego" discussions and so forth :-)), or negotiating interpretations of "good", or how it came to this.

    She just wants to be her former Self.
    And frankly, so do I.
    The world was a much better place when she was her old self.
    She may have helped thousands of people - perhaps more - and they will never know it.
    Besides, she isn't a fatalist by disposition. Or wasn't, at any rate. Maybe even that has changed.

    I don't come here all that often, so if there is a reply and if I don't acknowledge it, it will probably mean that I have not read it yet. Thank you.



    P.S. Thank you very much, <8>, for reading. :-)
    I just came here to edit something, so I noticed.
    Last edited by NeverMind; 6th October 2011 at 22:20.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hi Nevermind

    She has to face it first to get rid of her own created block. you have to face it and get rid of what ever she had thought that has now created a restriction.

    Please read this and you may bypass the first part if you wish, but read the second part for the releasing of her thoughts and feeling that are now restricting her as she used to be. I hope the content is understood.
    https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...onsense-part-1
    My regards to you
    roman

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hi..

    I just had a profound experience there i realized after looking back, my will was the thing holding me back.
    I had to let go for achieving the thing i wanted.

    Dont know if this helps, but i wish you both well...

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hello Romanwkt - thank you for your reply!

    She is aware of it - I told her so, but then I noticed it was only the words that escaped her, as she already was aware of it.

    I will definitely read the thread.
    Thank you very much!

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hello, <8> - thank you very much!

    It is interesting what you're saying.
    Something similar happened in this case... the problem was, the Will had been already poisoned by fear (those empathy issues).
    I distorted the Will - while it still existed - but it did not destroy it entirely.
    Which means the Will continued to exert effect for a while - only of the wrong kind...

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Quote Posted by NeverMind (here)

    Now, after suffering a series - let's call it an avalanche, it's more accurate - of devastating blows in the past five years, the will - the will of the Heart, that electric current that says, this will be so, end of story - appears to be gone.
    And the reason why it is gone is also clear: person X does not believe any more that nothing bad could ever happen to her or to her loved ones. (Before, she didn't - even after it seemingly had happened!) This was the corner stone of her power.

    Hi NeverMind, sorry to hear about the suffering of your friend. This is just my personal experience and observations, but I see that we're ALL in the process in varying degrees of going through situations that are seemingly insurmountable. No exceptions, unless you choose to remain totally unconscious.

    One thing I've learned well is that what may seem an insurmountable situation for one may be a cakewalk for another, and vice versa. For instance, it's hard for me to imagine, painful as it is, that losing a close loved one would basically be the end of me being me. On the other hand, your friend may have something mastered that is a lifelong struggle for me.

    Sometimes we all get flattened square on our faces, for whatever reasons that are important to us. I've certainly been laid out by life my fair share. Bottom line for me is, whether we are a gifted healer and psychic, or a regular Joe six pack, our individual challenges must eventually be met boldly and head on. Maybe person x could take some time to go fetal for a while, cry it out, and take some deep breaths, but eventually she is going to have to face this. Which is of course an aspect of her own self.

    I recall a quote by someone pretty smart who said: "These are the times that try men's souls."

    Funny how the more things change, the more they stay the same.

    Best of luck to your friend,
    Fred

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Thank you very much, Fred, for such a kind and thoughtful reply.

    Quote For instance, it's hard for me to imagine, painful as it is, that losing a close loved one would basically be the end of me being me.
    How well you put this...
    Unfortunately, that is one - only one - of the things that happened here, and while it did not mean the end of that person, in a way it did. It took away th horizon. I am sure I do not have to explain you what I mean by that, but yesterday's future is gone, and that may be one of the concomitant reasons for the severed will (but again, I am not talking about the ordinary will).
    And with that gone, what I am seeing in her is a strange implosion of her best, most extraordinary qualities. Not in the sense of diminishing or going "sour", no - but they are.... well, imploding, deactivating, in a manner of speaking.

    Thank you again.
    I will let you know how thing turn out. :-)

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Silence.

    Open the heart.

    Turn off the mind.

    Prayer establishes humility and opens one's heart to receive.

    Then the universe takes over.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Let it run its course, the answers will come.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    NeverMind, more people than one might suspect have experienced something similar to your friend, though in most cases not quite as intensely (as I happen to know from some of my own experience). Many war refugees, for instance. Until about two decades ago, the life expectancy for senior executives after retirement was under eighteen months, so I’d say that’s another example. Then there are so many people who created businesses which eventually went bankrupt. There also all kinds of minority groups, particularly where one, say, becomes a penniless migrant and wasn’t in a minority group earlier in one’s life -- or becomes crippled in an accident, etc.

    Is it possible to recover? For a certain number, the answer has obviously been yes. One example would be that of Viktor Frankl. He spent the second world war in a concentration camp, but the challenge of not letting it beat him led to his finding bliss, spiritual enlightenment, within those walls. Obviously, then, the answer to your question involves doing something rather like what Frankl did, in some way.

    I would say that one clue we can draw from Frankl’s experience is that the (only) way out involves contacting and healing the soul, or whatever term you want to use for whatever the deepest “inside” of a person is. I would say that who a person deeply is has very close connections with their self-esteem. You could even say that a person is their self-esteem at some deep level, pretty much.

    May I suggest it’s not a matter of concentrating on developing the will? The will only gets its strength from great inner freedom (or from more superficial forms of freedom, which I don’t believe we’re concerned with). That requires great genuine self-esteem. It can be done, but it’s very rare and difficult to achieve this without self-observation of some kind. Admittedly, that’s more a matter of observing the true Self, the soul, particularly if prolonged meditation should be your strategy of choice. The only other way would be for her to be mightily and powerfully and genuinely loved in rather extraordinary ways over a prolonged period.

    Apart from that, freedom requires psychotherapy or its equivalent. It quintessentially and necessarily requires shadow work (such as the Sedona method, or some of Inelia Benz’s “welcoming” “processes”, and so on).

    My apologies if this is repeating some of the ideas Fred S has offered -- but I wrote this before reading his post.
    Last edited by TraineeHuman; 7th October 2011 at 07:18.
    Above all, always refuse to cut your life in two: nonduality/duality, matter/Spirit, etc
    A mind which is not crippled by memory has real freedom. ~ J. Krishnamurti
    (True, deep) stillness is the way.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    To all of you who haven't clicked yet, https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...onsense-part-1 is the Sedona method without the fluff, which is explained more deeper here and to the point.

    regards to all
    roman

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    This is only a suggestion. Our feelings get caught in what is called the subtle body not in the mind.
    Ask her if she could try this for a while, see if there is any change.

    The Subtle Body

    About three fingers' width below the navel is a chakra which controls the downward wind and subtle body. Our feelings are not held in the mind, but in the subtle body. When we are apprehensive, worried, or even just having a conversation with someone, we might feel a tension in the gut, heart, throat or head. This downward wind is called lung in Tibetan (pronounced loong), and when it rises, it reveals tension in the body.

    In the west. we get very 'lungy' ...hot under the collar! We are speedy people.

    The lung has to be brought down to where it should be, below the navel. As a result of our emotions, a residue is left in our subtle body, and it is quite exhausting. It also has other effects such as dry eyes.

    Sometimes in meditation, though we practise, we still do not feel at ease: this is a lung/wind problem. I had all the above problems until I practised with the subtle body. The effect was quite noticeable - ask my teacher! (and the wife...)

    It is a very simple practice of mentally scanning the body from the top down, and taking the attention to below the navel. This is done with the help of the 'gentle breath': as you scan, breath in naturally, taking the breath down to below the navel and holding it there for the count of 6-9 seconds (your tummy will fill out a bit, but do not strain).

    Release the breath, but let a small amount remain there.

    I did this 108 times in one session once a day, for six months. It had the effect of my being at perfect peace. You do not have to do it 108 times - see how it feels. During the day when you feel the lung/wind rising, merely remember to scan and take the breath down a few times

    All the best to you both,
    Tony

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Quote Posted by NeverMind (here)
    I really wouldn't be doing this if the person regarding whom I am asking did not mean so much to me (and for humanity in general).
    I can give advice - and have done so - but outside advice, preferably from people who are in the same predicament (unlikely, as such people are very difficult to find), would be very welcome, for a number of different reasons.

    Here is the problem.
    This person I am talking about is or was a miracle maker. Or maybe a best-scenario-collapser, whatever. :-) I am talking about heavy-duty turn-arounds, improbable or even seemingly "impossible" things happening. This was so ever since this person was a small child.

    This person also has an openness, a sense of empathy that borders on mind-reading and clairvoyance. This is a problem because it seems to have debilitated this person, and eventually it took away her joyful "magic".

    Now, after suffering a series - let's call it an avalanche, it's more accurate - of devastating blows in the past five years, the will - the will of the Heart, that electric current that says, this will be so, end of story - appears to be gone.
    And the reason why it is gone is also clear: person X does not believe any more that nothing bad could ever happen to her or to her loved ones. (Before, she did - even after it seemingly had happened!) This was the corner stone of her power.

    Now,whenever she tries to reignite that old creative spark that had always worked for her before she was drained, the thought of all the horrible things that did happen comes to her mind, and paralyses her will.
    (Not the ordinary "will", mind you; this person is perfectly functional. I am talking about the demiurg's will.)

    Do you, any of you, know of an effective method of reigniting the Will, bypass the feedback od "experience", and avoid self-observing while doing it?

    I can tell you that reasoning - even in esoteric terms - won't help.
    It's as if she had some sort of in-built mechanism now that keeps reminding her of all the terrible things that happened after she allowed herself to be sucked dry of the creative "sap" by her own empathy.
    Not even the memory and awareness of her previous life and "might" helps.

    And please, I am not asking for reasoning why this might even be good for her (the "Ego" discussions and so forth :-)), or negotiating interpretations of "good", or how it came to this.

    She just wants to be her former Self.
    And frankly, so do I.
    The world was a much better place when she was her old self.
    She may have helped thousands of people - perhaps more - and they will never know it.
    Besides, she isn't a fatalist by disposition. Or wasn't, at any rate. Maybe even that has changed.

    I don't come here all that often, so if there is a reply and if I don't acknowledge it, it will probably mean that I have not read it yet. Thank you.



    P.S. Thank you very much, <8>, for reading. :-)
    I just came here to edit something, so I noticed.
    Do you know sometimes Nevermind the best thing to do in this situation is just to rest and see it out.
    Fred's advice is spot on in my view.
    I have myself had a difficult time lately, not just as a result of losing the love of my life which I knew would be and IS the worst thing that I have ever experienced as a human being, but I have had other health issues that, although not life threatening, have been going on for years and cause me a lot of pain on a regular basis. It is and has been exhausting, truely ENERGY sapping.
    BUT..................
    What do I do................. I listen to my higher self (as I know it now) and stop trying so hard. I rest, I request others to let me be alone, not to distrub me for a period of time.
    Time is relative so it depends on how much time your friend needs - days, weeks, months, years perhaps?
    All you can do to help her is don't 'demand' any change from her - it will come of its own accord, and it WILL come. You might not feel you are demanding and you might not be demanding improvement but she may sence this from you??? I don't know.
    Let her just BE for the moment - cry if she wants to cry, scream if she wants to scream, be alone, talk whatever she wants to do.
    The best thing you can do for her now is LISTEN and be there for her but watch that she doesn't get overwhelmed or dragged down too much that will affect her physical or mental health to any great extent. If this happens or you see it happening to any great extent then she might need some medical assistance.

    Not that I am a fan in any way of the medical profession (sorry to any medical folks out there ) or a fan of medication but what we don't want to happen is for her to get 'out of control' with her 'grief'/energy loss.

    My feeling is if she had that jour de Vive in the first place it is in her 'makeup' and although it may seem like it is lost, its not!

    Listen, be patient, allow her to BE but most importantly LISTEN. I'm sure you already are.
    I wish you and your friend LOVE and Peace.
    "Thinking: The talking of the soul with itself” - Plato
    LOVE, LOVE, always LOVE

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hi, this is an interesting post. Sort of reminds me of my last relationship, and I've had to address a similar issue. My ex was a lot like who you're describing. If this person is so incredibly sensitive, she isn't lost. I'm only going to offer my opinion, I don't get that I'm being 'told' anything, so this might lack a vibe o compassion. I'll put it in bullet form so it really looks cold and cruel.

    1. Respect her choice. I don't know anyone that I consider to be a true healer, who hasn't had to crash and burn somehow in the last few years. 'Healer' is as false an identity as any. Who she is in reality has a fair bit to say in the choices she makes.
    Healer is just a job. You can take a break if you want to.

    2. Forgive your own need to believe she's supposed to be doing anything that YOU think she's supposed to be doing. If you think about it, that's a bit strange. If she's not doing it then you start doing it if it's so important to you.

    3. Otherwise watch yourself.

    Realize or remember or whatever, that a true healer can't not heal. You may not notice that if you need it to be obvious to you. If she has human stuff to work out, what better way than to be a human identity instead of a 'magical' identity for while? That doesn't mean that she's not who she is. It'd be pretty tough having to look miraculous if you feel like crap.

    Sorry about that. That form reminds me of a lot unpleasant lecturers. .
    Last edited by markpierre; 7th October 2011 at 09:33.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    I was so sorry to hear of your friend's experience. I obviously don't know her age - if she is anywhere near the menopause, hormones can play havoc with some people's emotional wellbeing. Just a thought - I may be way off ;
    Kathie

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    I think we all get life/soul tests that are matched to our next level of awareness expansion. Though what we go through may seem really crap compared to yesterday (when things were groovy). In true oneness the whole shebang has to be accommodated in awareness and allowance. So I'm saying that her best learning will still come about but she may have to swallow a dose 'being ordinary' for a while. Life comes in many flavors.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Quote Posted by ROMANWKT (here)
    To all of you who haven't clicked yet, https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...onsense-part-1 is the Sedona method without the fluff, which is explained more deeper here and to the point.

    regards to all
    roman
    Hi roman, thank you for reminding us of that most excellent thread you started. I remember briefly glancing over your original post back in March, but I guess I just wasn't ready to fully comprehend what you were getting at, and I just blew it off. Well, I get it now. Timing is everything huh? It's still a long road to haul, but it's nice to finally atleast be on the road. Thanks again.

    Cheers,
    Fred

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    Avalon Member NeverMind's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Wow, thank you so much, everybody!
    I am not at home now, and I am in a hurry, but I will copy all this and read it in-depth later.

    You are GREAT.

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Quote Posted by markpierre (here)
    Hi, this is an interesting post. Sort of reminds me of my last relationship, and I've had to address a similar issue. My ex was a lot like who you're describing. If this person is so incredibly sensitive, she isn't lost. I'm only going to offer my opinion, I don't get that I'm being 'told' anything, so this might lack a vibe o compassion. I'll put it in bullet form so it really looks cold and cruel.

    1. Respect her choice. I don't know anyone that I consider to be a true healer, who hasn't had to crash and burn somehow in the last few years. 'Healer' is as false an identity as any. Who she is in reality has a fair bit to say in the choices she makes.
    Healer is just a job. You can take a break if you want to.

    2. Forgive your own need to believe she's supposed to be doing anything that YOU think she's supposed to be doing. If you think about it, that's a bit strange. If she's not doing it then you start doing it if it's so important to you.

    3. Otherwise watch yourself.

    Realize or remember or whatever, that a true healer can't not heal. You may not notice that if you need it to be obvious to you. If she has human stuff to work out, what better way than to be a human identity instead of a 'magical' identity for while? That doesn't mean that she's not who she is. It'd be pretty tough having to look miraculous if you feel like crap.

    Sorry about that. That form reminds me of a lot unpleasant lecturers. .
    Hi Nevermind,

    Sounds like to me she is very sensitive and sometimes too sensitive people are highly affected by events and the environment....also they need to recognize their own humaness very important here. Working with spirit and doing good things for the people, earth and the universe are really great things -to recognize our own hearts and humaness we need that connection also. Some kind of Shadow work and appreciating her own self might help. How nice that she has a friend like you.

    Nora

    we are all related

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    Default Re: Seeking serious advice on will (to create)

    Hi nevermind, I would like to add some wisdom from my own personal experience. I used to be a 'healer' and was the epicenter for 'miraculous' cures. One day that role was over, I just was not interested in it anymore. I had been using the old shamanic method of 'taking on patterns' within myself and balancing them within me... then the 'other' would change. However, I eventually could not balance myself if I was also balancing others.

    This has been a gift in the long run. I did not realize it at first, however on a very deep unconscious level I realized that no one needed healing. I also saw that people create 'terrible' things in their lives in order to have that experience. And many have dramatic leaps in awareness and awakeness as they go through a difficult time. Sometimes I still help others if asked, however I usually just give them a few tools to help themselves.

    There is another really important issue which was touched on here, however more information would be really helpful if this applies to 'person x'
    Quote f she is anywhere near the menopause, hormones can play havoc with some people's emotional well being.
    So... if she is in this place.... be aware that when the estrogen levels rise during menopause, great periods of depression and deep grief are the result. The 'fix' for hormonal imbalance is very simple! She would need to have a dose of off-the-shelf progesterone cream applied daily to her skin. Within 15 minutes of application, a dramatic difference will be felt and observed. No one realizes how devastating menopause can be until they, or someone they know, is going through it!

    What if no one needs healing?
    What if the 'problems' we see others having are being created by them in order to help them awaken?
    What if being a 'healer' was just a phase in someone's life?
    What if EVERYONE has the absolute power to heal themselves and others?
    What if depression is just a time of 'deep rest' before something new can happen?
    What if there is nothing wrong?
    What if the changes you are seeing signal a new way of being that is ready to emerge?
    Last edited by Dawn; 8th October 2011 at 05:28.

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