Negativity - I Hate It!

[justpeter]

This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls

Also, telling someone: "You are wrong!" is almost guaranteed to generate negative emotion in the receiver. How about diplomatically suggesting the person may not be right? Isn't that better?

Also, saying something like: "I can't understand how so many supposedly intelligent people can possibly believe this ...." is surely going to generate negative emotion in a lot of people isn't it? There must be a gentler way of expressing beliefs and ideas, in my opinion.

Anyway, I'm no saint and the above message is for me as much as for anyone else.

Please feel free to comment but don't paint on my walls, thanks

Love

[Celine]

I see your point and must say I agree.

Debate tools are useful in a forum.

We need to apply compassion..our heart.. to all that we do.

The screen we "type" to, removes warmth, removes touch..to an extent.

IMHO this creates a dynamic of "inhibition" that leads to a lawless type of posting.

just...feel..the ones behind the screen...

Remember they have a heart too

[Vidya Moksha]

Posted by céline (here)

just...feel..the ones behind the screen...

Remember they have a heart too

some people just cant do this, they have no empathy. They are often intelligent, and sometimes 'alternative' in their views, but never empathic. There are are couple here... at least

[blue777]

Posted by justpeter (here)
This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls

Also, telling someone: "You are wrong!" is almost guaranteed to generate negative emotion in the receiver. How about diplomatically suggesting the person may not be right? Isn't that better?

Also, saying something like: "I can't understand how so many supposedly intelligent people can possibly believe this ...." is surely going to generate negative emotion in a lot of people isn't it? There must be a gentler way of expressing beliefs and ideas, in my opinion.

Anyway, I'm no saint and the above message is for me as much as for anyone else.

Please feel free to comment but don't paint on my walls, thanks

Love

I totally agree with the above
lol
blue

[stardustaquarion]

I think that life is varied and people has different perspectives. One can not control what others do. But one can chose ones reactions to what other people say. One can choose what to feel

When people sees that their core beliefs are threatened they feel upset, it does not matter how soft the infomation is presented. People can only feel upset because they are "beliefs" and not knowledge. Knowledge can not be threatened because it comes from within.

Beliefs is what this forum is about and because of that, it is possible to find things that disagree with such beliefs and make people upset. It is not the information, it is how people feel about the information that creates conflict and bad feelings

Having been submited to harsh treatement myself, I'll rather have a peaceful debate but many choose not to and throw the baby with the pram because their arguments don't hold and they are inconsistent, and yet again they are only words and there is no need to have such reactions as if one is threatened with death. This is a forum for whiselblowers, as whiselblowers there is a search for the truth and that is bound to rufle some feathers

How can we build healthy communities if we do not know where we stand? should we continue to use fluoride or to cheer at chemtrails? Most of us come here for infomation or spiritual insights, many times we find here information that is plainly harmful but it is up to the moderators to determine what goes and what not, otherewise there will be no free speach

When things get a bit off I take it as a lesson to learn peaceful co-existance and to keep a centre even when my emotional body is upset. I am learning to shut up a bit more often, maybe one day I will not post anymore

Love

[Celine]

Once the argument, turns to personal attack,...it tells me the other has nothing left to argue with that is valide. Attacking anothers heart is a low blow.

[stardustaquarion]

Hi Celine, it is human nature too because we have been raised in a competitive environment that promotes the "survival of the fitest" rather than peaceful co-existance which means that even if we can have different points of view we can agree to disgree, there is no need for agression.

Maybe we are moving to peaceful co-existance and that is the reason why we feel less tolerant to abuse

Love

[SteveX]

Posted by justpeter (here)
SNIPPED

This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls
Love

To a degree I take your point if the underlining response is born of malice. However, when debating the "fors" and "against" I see adding links as vital to supporting your argument. No one will take my word for it without evidence. Debate requires an element of supporting fact.

Then we have those that start a threads with absolutely bogus info and vids. Videos like a man standing in a field with a web cam. Videos of a conjurer doing conjuring magic tricks. Videos of 2 suns from lens flare. Just absolute trash that, in my opinion, only works to bring the authenticity of this site down. It's these people I'll be quite curt with. You can read that as giving them a slap on the wrist for trying to take the "P" or being so gullible.

[Steven]

Posted by justpeter (here)
This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls

Also, telling someone: "You are wrong!" is almost guaranteed to generate negative emotion in the receiver. How about diplomatically suggesting the person may not be right? Isn't that better?

Also, saying something like: "I can't understand how so many supposedly intelligent people can possibly believe this ...." is surely going to generate negative emotion in a lot of people isn't it? There must be a gentler way of expressing beliefs and ideas, in my opinion.

Anyway, I'm no saint and the above message is for me as much as for anyone else.

Please feel free to comment but don't paint on my walls, thanks

Love

Oh, how much I agree with you here... Usually, when someone comes to a thread I started, saying I was wrong , I take it as an opportunity to go further into my perspective to develop the first idea. Often, I am surprised to discover the foundation of my idea simply by being challenged. It all depends how the person bring his/her disagreement...

Namaste, Steven

[justpeter]

Posted by SteveX (here)
To a degree I take your point if the underlining response is born of malice. However, when debating the "fors" and "against" I see adding links as vital to supporting your argument. No one will take my word for it without evidence. Debate requires an element of supporting fact.

Yes, I agree. The kind of thing I was thinking about was if someone mentioned something good about a subject, say for example, Scientology, it often results in people doing a google search of the word "scientology" which results in lots of negative tittle-tattle about it. They then post all these links and say: "Well this proves it's rubbish.". It's a cheap shot, not a reasoned argument and the people who do it often don't know the first thing about the subject, they're just trying to be clever. I agree that links are useful if someone is engaging in a positive debate with a view to coming to a reasonable conclusion.

[justpeter]

Posted by Steven (here)
Oh, how much I agree with you here... Usually, when someone comes to a thread I started, saying I was wrong , I take it as an opportunity to go further into my perspective to develop the first idea. Often, I am surprised to discover the foundation of my idea simply by being challenged. It all depends how the person bring his/her disagreement...

Namaste, Steven

Yes. I think using it as an opportunity to develop your idea is a very positive thing. But I think most people wouldn't be able to control themselves in that way - they just get mad and start an argument. That's my experience anyway. I always try not to use the word "wrong" in that sense because it tends to start a fight

[THE eXchanger]

it makes you wonder,
if there is a point, that many people,
rather than to endure, all the fighting,
just stop eXchanging, and, just stop sharing

that no matter, what is truly inside of them,
it is just easier, and, likely better for them,
to just shut themselves off,
to the outside world, and just retreat/and, withdraw into themselves,
by keeping it all inside, rather than - daring to let it out

i am sure, many good people do exercise, or, do take that silent option
and, it makes me wonder just how much, good stuff,
the world actually misses, when good people shut down, and, their flow is stopped/or,
they choose to just stop it ?

[justpeter]

Posted by THE eXchanger (here)
it makes you wonder,
if there is a point, that many people,
rather than to endure, all the fighting,
just stop eXchanging, and, just stop sharing

that no matter, what is truly inside of them,
it is just easier, and, likely better for them,
to just shut themselves off,
to the outside world, and just retreat/and, withdraw into themselves,
by keeping it all inside, rather than - daring to let it out

i am sure, many good people do exercise, or, do take that silent option
and, it makes me wonder just how much, good stuff,
the world actually misses, when good people shut down, and, their flow is stopped/or,
they choose to just stop it ?

I completely agree. Very good point.

[mike1414]

Posted by justpeter (here)
This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls

Also, telling someone: "You are wrong!" is almost guaranteed to generate negative emotion in the receiver. How about diplomatically suggesting the person may not be right? Isn't that better?

Also, saying something like: "I can't understand how so many supposedly intelligent people can possibly believe this ...." is surely going to generate negative emotion in a lot of people isn't it? There must be a gentler way of expressing beliefs and ideas, in my opinion.

Anyway, I'm no saint and the above message is for me as much as for anyone else.

Please feel free to comment but don't paint on my walls, thanks

Love

i completely agree. good thread!

David Hawkins - All judgment reveals itself to be self-judgment in the end, and when this is understood a larger comprehension of the nature of life takes its place.

peace always
mike

[stardustaquarion]

Posted by THE eXchanger (here)
it makes you wonder,
if there is a point, that many people,
rather than to endure, all the fighting,
just stop eXchanging, and, just stop sharing

that no matter, what is truly inside of them,
it is just easier, and, likely better for them,
to just shut themselves off,
to the outside world, and just retreat/and, withdraw into themselves,
by keeping it all inside, rather than - daring to let it out

i am sure, many good people do exercise, or, do take that silent option
and, it makes me wonder just how much, good stuff,
the world actually misses, when good people shut down, and, their flow is stopped/or,
they choose to just stop it ?

Thank you for your thoughts Susan, I must say I was rather tempted today to throw the towel but after thinking about it I decided not to let the gremlins win, after all we are all here making an effort to raise the awareness of who ever visit us

Love

[rosie]

There is and always will be a fine balance when it comes to group interaction. We are not lemmings hurtling towards the same conclusion. For this reason, there will be negativity popping up. If we think we should all be in the same train of thought, then we have got it all wrong. Each persons opinions are important to themselves, so they wish to share, sometimes forgetting that we are all not on the same boat, even though we may think we are.

We do need the ones who question, the ones who make us think, negative or not.

I believe we need to have some more "allowance" when it comes to others who are on the same search as ourselves. There is not one person who is more important then the other, no matter how smart one may think of themselves.

There can be many heavy discussions going on here, juices get stirred up, feelings will be hurt, but as in all families, there is forgiveness and love. We just need to remember this.

love & light

[Solphilos]

Posted by justpeter (here)
This is, hopefully, a lighthearted plea for a bit of consideration regarding other people's opinions and beliefs.

In my opinion, it's very easy to "debunk" some person or idea by doing a quick google search, finding a negative article and posting it in someone's thread. Personally I don't like this. I think it's fine to disagree with someone by expressing your own feelings or ideas but this kind of "debunking" is very easy to do and, in my opinion, very negative. When done in someone else's thread it's a bit like going into someone's house and painting graffiti on the walls

Also, telling someone: "You are wrong!" is almost guaranteed to generate negative emotion in the receiver. How about diplomatically suggesting the person may not be right? Isn't that better?

Also, saying something like: "I can't understand how so many supposedly intelligent people can possibly believe this ...." is surely going to generate negative emotion in a lot of people isn't it? There must be a gentler way of expressing beliefs and ideas, in my opinion.

Anyway, I'm no saint and the above message is for me as much as for anyone else.

Please feel free to comment but don't paint on my walls, thanks

Love

I understand your reasons for feeling this way, but remember, the way we emotionally respond to other people and their actions is our responsibility, not the other persons.
People are always going to try and prove another wrong, one way or the other. They may engage in a proper debate, or they will flat out call you wrong or laugh at your opinions.
I don't agree with these methods, but I'm also accepting of the way all people are, and they way they choose to engage a topic. Because I rule my own emotional fire, I'm completely open to people saying what they will after I express my opinions, even if they call me wrong, laugh, or try to "debunk" what I'm saying. Actually, I enjoy when they do this because it brings new dimensions to the discussion. I'm okay with disagreements, because if any of my ideas cannot stand on their own in an argument, then they are not worth believing.

[Humble Janitor]

You "hate" negativity. That's already negative.

I dislike it. It exists though and that's a part of life. Learning how to work around it and fight it off is the fun part.

[Lucid Jia]

Posted by Humble Janitor (here)
You "hate" negativity. That's already negative.

I dislike it. It exists though and that's a part of life. Learning how to work around it and fight it off is the fun part.

Strange... I was just about to say the same thing.

"I hate it!" is a very negative sentence. Seems to be a contradiction. I agree HJ, its part of learning free will.

Namaste, Jia.

[Ross]

Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

(Don Miguel Ruiz)

Peace