How many people make sense to us?

[dreamchaser]

Im not great at listening to people so i have to make an extra effort at it. Ive always wanted to be a good listener. But when I try to listen to ppl talking about whatever I find that too often what they say doesnt make sense, common sense! "Dont SAY that?" "Why?", no answer. "Dont DO that?" "Why", no answer. i despise ANYone telling me what to do without any back up! Without a reason. Why do so many people SEEM to be backwards? It aggravates me like a splinter in my mind. Tormenting me. Why is it SO diffucult to speak to people.

A big part of it is, I believe, the english language. Another big part of it is in social conditioning. Maybe thats all of it. i certainly believe it most of it.

My kids asked me recently where we came from. I told them we came from space. i saw no reason to lie. its what i believe. if and when they want to know more about MY view, and it IS only a view because I have no proof. I will tell them honestly what i believe, and why. My dad heard them talking about it, and said to me to not be telling them we came from space. I will tell anyone what I believe! And Im NOT likely to just do what ppl say for any reason that i dont believe in. IS it possible that just do what others say without really thinking about it?

I was once told that its better NOT to think. I could NEVER believe that!! And hopefully I will never get that tired that i will stop asking Why! There is NO point to life, for me, without learning! So if anyone says to me Dont be silly, I wont answer them! Why would I? it would be silly to do so! Or if anyone askes me Why i always ask why the odds are i wont answer them either. Because obviously asking questions arent important to anyone like that. Why am i always surrounded by people who just dont want to know anything? Was i possibly SO bad in a past life that this is my karma? Or have i done this to myself now in this life?

I dont like the truth being hidden! Theres no integrity in that behaviour!

Love and peace to ALL!!

[Arpheus]

The zombie state that most common folk are enshrouded in will not allow them to see beyond the veil dreamchaser,if in your lifetime you manage to help one or two people wake up somehow,be proud of yourself and you will have achieved some serious spiritual dharma,because thats considerable a great feat in this dark days,there are too many powers at work trying desperately to hold on to their reality brainwashing people on a daily basis,poisoning our food our water our planet using soundwaves microwaves vibrations and all kinds of things like that.Because they are afraid that their world is starting to fall apart on them,i dont try to wake people up anymore unless the oportunity presents itself in a subtle way,the i may try to throw a few hints here and there,but most people are so programmed into the current system that it gets tough to get the point across without hurting people's feeling or making yourself look like a nut or lunatic conspiracy theorist under other people's eyes,so for me i just try to live my life from day to day and focus on trying to better myself so my energy can be of some use in some way shape or form somehow.You get used to it after a while .

[Operator]

Communication is a difficult process ... when you want to express an idea it travels through many layers before you even speak words.
Then at the other side the process works backwards, the spoken words need to be translated to a conceptual level again.

Lots of people don't care too much which words they use, they don't even realize that they will not be understood ...

That's why I prefer writing emails or letters, you can rephrase to improve the meaning of a sentence. Mis-communication (especially through the spoken word) is often the cause of quarrels or even war.
Spoken words need to be remembered if you want to evaluate ... and every involved party remembers a version that is favorable to their explanation.
Written words are so much better to use for evaluation.

[East Sun]

I agree with you completely, Operator!

I'm not good at face to face debates/arguments etc. Before the internet i wished i could have communication with an intelligent person or persons by writing to each other. That never happened for obvious reasons. The internet is an answer to thing desired.

[Kulapops]

I'm only just starting to make sense to me !

How can I expect anyone else to ???

But then, as we're all one anyway, I try to fit in as much compassion as possible around the place. A bit like needing stuff cushions on a sofa...

:0)

[Operator]

Posted by Kulapops (here)
But then, as we're all one anyway, I try to fit in as much compassion as possible around the place. A bit like needing stuff cushions on a sofa...

Well spoken Kulapops !
If we understand the process and the mishaps we're more likely to massage the communication ...

From "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" >> Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
There would be less 'fights' if wouldn't put our own perceptions in the first place ...

[East Sun]

I always thought it was me--an indication of paranoia I suppose, but that's ok. I became confused early on when others behaved in a way I did not think was logical. Through my life people thought I was 'odd' or worse. If I ever said what I thought I was immediately condemned by looks, frowns or verbal abuse. So what does that mean.
I think we have something in common, dreamchaser, that we have to solve ourselves. Many decades of searching shows me that our road is full of stumbling stones and the veil we hope to shed is still there.

[HORIZONS]

Clear Concise Communication - the three C's - is very important in our personal and business relationships, and as I see it it is one of the main failures that could have been avoided when problems arise in our personal lives or at work. We must seek to understand and to be understood, and this takes practice and a strong work ethic, and unfortunately there are many that do not care, nor understand, about this important issue in human relationships. So many problems can be avoided when we can communicate effectively - and learning to listen is something that must be worked at as well, as we must have an ear to hear what others are saying so that we might make sense of what is being said.

[dreamchaser]

Thanks SO much to all who have commented on this thread. means a lot to me! Sure we can all only BUT keep trying, I guess. One of the ppl who I find it very difficult to talk to, listen to is my gf. Oops. Well, i havent given up trying to communicate, yet, if I ever do!

love and peace to all!

[Kulapops]

Hmm... not that I belong to relate counselling or anything... but from my own experiences, problems communicating with bfs and gfs is possibly down to something a lot deeper.

It's like, at a root level, there is something they don't want to tell you. I may be jumping to the wrong conclusions here, and they may not even know it themselves...but when I've experienced this, the 'thing' that does not want to be communicated is 'you are not the one'. This leads to problems of understanding at the higher up levels.... like running your daily lives.

Follow your instincts, trust in what you know and your gut feelings. Follow your hunches. This can be very painful, because what we think we want is not always what we can have. But with a greater perspective, it is because there is a much more golden path that awaits us. And if we can let go of our fears, see that we are in fact banging our heads against a cosmic wall of petulence, a whole other world may rush up to greet us.

It did for me.

Much love,

K

[dreamchaser]

I accept that. But if an unspoken message suggests that "I" am not the one isnt there a possibility that the same silence could also say that "they" are not the one? I dont really wanna get into the maze of human social interactions here. And maybe Im too stubbornly convinced that there is a way forward for everyone. But I do firmly believe that there is more than just one answer to probably every situation.

Love and peace.

[JoeNashville]

I have always listened to understand and seek understanding. I first noticed the things you mentioned decades ago, even as a child and of course it's getting exponentially worse as time goes by. It's even more fascinating when people say things that don't make sense on the surface, then when you probe their thinking it doesn't make sense on any level even to them, yet they keep saying it. They don't even question themselves on things that don't make sense!

They lack of intellectual curiosity is tragic.

[dreamchaser]

Maybe its more tragic for us who want to know more than it is for them who apparently just go through life on autopilot. But of COURSE i believe it actually IS tragic for all of us collectively! But I cant help thinking that maybe there is a false comfort for those who dont wanna think about where were all going. Like the phrase "What you dont know about wont hurt you". Partly true, in some sense. It likely wont effect everyone until it hits everyone. Then we will likely be in the situation where we will be ready to act on a given change that we believe is coming. While those who havent thought about it may very well all be in a state of chaos. So i guess my train of thought has brought me back to the position that we must ALL be ready for change when it does come, and very likely be getting ready for a change before it happens!

[greybeard]

Posted by dreamchaser (here)
Maybe its more tragic for us who want to know more than it is for them who apparently just go through life on autopilot. But of COURSE i believe it actually IS tragic for all of us collectively! But I cant help thinking that maybe there is a false comfort for those who dont wanna think about where were all going. Like the phrase "What you dont know about wont hurt you". Partly true, in some sense. It likely wont effect everyone until it hits everyone. Then we will likely be in the situation where we will be ready to act on a given change that we believe is coming. While those who havent thought about it may very well all be in a state of chaos. So i guess my train of thought has brought me back to the position that we must ALL be ready for change when it does come, and very likely be getting ready for a change before it happens!

I think that is a very intelligent observation Dreamchaser.
Many unaware people are kind and thoughtful and dont really see an "enemy".
Unfortunately in the first stages of becoming awake there is a feeling that there is some thing out there trying to control us and keep us in ignorance, that may well be so at that initial level of awakening, "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing." Thats divisive.
Then hopefully spirituality starts to evolve and then there is the knowing that this thinking negates Oneness and we move on to forgiving.
The "other" serves its purpose in that it give us opportunity to forgive and be in a state of unconditional love.
Love is not blind neither does it condone.
Chris

[Kulapops]

We all have a truth, a piece of the puzzle...sharing this openly as you are doing dreamchaser is what is important for me.

My feelings and reflections can only show my own thoughts and experience, that may or may not resonate for others (though it's fun when it does resonate :0) )

Maybe I'm personifying it too much by saying that's something they are communicating, because in reality the soul conversation is two way.. and if it's not working, it's not working for both. Or the purpose of the interaction of the two souls may not be the one we think it's about. With effort on both sides, the reason for the connection may become known. Indeed problems or misunderstandings can also be corrected. In this lies the lesson that two souls are brought together to learn.

In hindsight, I am grateful for every dispute. :0) Not easy at the time though... especially where the heart is involved and invested.

Joe - Love what you have to say on this. Yep, very insightful, and why is it that some seem to be inconsistent in their logic and behaviours, and why does that stand out to us as it does? Why do we notice as clearly as we do, when they don't. Defensive behaviours can really set in if you start pointing out inconsistencies in people's actions/beliefs !

K

[Operator]

Posted by greybeard (here)
Many unaware people are kind and thoughtful and dont really see an "enemy".

If you try to bring some of it to their attention ... the unaware people will say "They, there is no they !" (as in enemy).
Then they continue and claim you are crazy and should behave normally (whatever that is) ... You ask: Why ? ...

Their answer: ... because THEY say so ...

[Niobe]

Posted by greybeard (here)
Love is not blind neither does it condone.
Chris

Hi Chris, Would you please expand on this sentence a bit? It jumped out at me, and I would like to hear more.

Regarding this topic- as a female, I have a hard time communicating with a lot of people, especially other women. An example is an office setting in which eight women work ( my previous job). Many of them enjoyed standing around talking about, what was to me, mindless chatter. Sometimes it seems like they talked just to hear themselves talk.
I was never comfortable trying to join in on a conversation like this. The work scenario is just an example. I've gotten to the point where I rarely put myself in situations where there might be groups of people engaged in this type of talk. I don't understand how people can just ramble on about nothing. I guess maybe they are just so into their reality that they feel that is all there is? I am not saying they are bad people, I just don't like to be in a situation where I feel uncomfortable because I can't relate.
Niobe

[Fredkc]

I don't understand how people can just ramble on about nothing.

Actually, you had it... "they talked just to hear themselves talk." Or better put, "to be heard talking".

Attention is energy. Agreement provides energy. Generally that's what "bull sessions" are about. Everyone gets a chance to rattle the group, with whatever, and they gain attention and agreement. What they're talking about is mostly irrelevant. It's an energy circle.

You can watch the dynamics of them, really. Everyone gets to toss in their current bit, and receive attention/agreement. The group will come to an unspoken agreement about parameters within which you get auto-fed the acceptance. People will then come and go from the group as the topics either exceed their limitations, or change to include them.

Mostly the people around us are about what we do, or don't understand. They change based upon what we are currently seeking to "be fed" with, or what we're trying to noodle out. Watch how, once you've "figured out" something to where you can leave it alone, people will also drop from your circle.

It's the universal "I" haggling things out.

Fred

[dreamchaser]

Thank you very much Greybeard. Im honoured for the complimernt!

Thanks to EVERYone for their insights!

Operator, so very true so often.

Much love and peace to all!

[Operator]

Posted by dreamchaser (here)
Thank you very much Greybeard. Im honoured for the complimernt!

Thanks to EVERYone for their insights!

Operator, so very true so often.

Much love and peace to all!

You can use the same stick to poke them with when they say you are a conspiracy nut.

You just give them a few 'examples of evidence' and they will say it was planted (in some cases that's also true), fake and just 'internet'.
Then you only have to reply: "So you DO believe in conspiracies yourself after all !"