Our unschooling experiment

[pilotsimone]

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[enfoldedblue]

Thanks for sharing your story. It was very timely for me as I have been mulling the idea of homeschooling around in my head for the last week.

My son is only 3 so no rush in making decisions. Where I live we have a beautiful Steiner school, that initially I was very interested in. We attended the playgroup there for the last few years, and I found that many of the parents I met with children in 'real school' were disillusioned for various reasons. The more I hear, the less interested I am.

The state school nearby is meant to be good...but really how good can a state school be. I remember seeing the boring repetitive exercises they had the kids doing.

The only thing I personally enjoyed about school was the social aspect. This is one of my concerns about homeschooling. But, I aim to start connecting with other parents and hope that by the time Jasper is ready for school I will have a nice group of kids and parents to share schooling with. Ideally I think a group of about 5 kids would be a good number, with the teaching shared by the parents.

There is a great home-school network here where I live, and they frequently have big group activities, outings, picnics etc.

So this might be the direction we head as well.

Thanks

[Carmen]

Socialisation is the only thing I would worry about with home schooling. We have a few families home schooling in our area. One family in particular, the children are painfully shy and lack opportunities, from my perspective, that enable them to meet other children. Otherwise, I think homeschooling is wonderful. And, I especially love what Sir Ken Robinson has to say.

BTW, has anyone read the Foxfire magazines? They are downloadable and very inspiring. The teacher who had the foresight to get that going was truly inspired.

[Ellisa]

Firstly--- a state school can be brilliant, and there are good ones around. Rote learning is not often used nowadays, but it can be fun and some things have to be earned 'off by heart'.

Secondly----Small is not always best for schools-- though too big can become a problem too.

Thirdly---In the early years of schooling socialisation is very important and difficult to achieve at home (unless you are surrounded by large families with parents who work from home or stay home.)

Fourthly--- It is incredibly hard work to home school, and I think impossible if you are working outside the home unless you work unsociable hours.

Five---. Explain to your child that there will be rules at school. Sometimes they will need to be quiet, but other times they will be able to make lots of noise as they play in the schoolyard.

and lastly (though I can think of more!)--- Here in my Australian state home schooling has to follow the guidelines and frameworks of the regular schools. This is checked up. The children do not have to do the exams, but they find it hard to access further education without taking the necessary entrance exams, (there are special ones for home schooled children).

My advice is to look carefully for a school you like. Visit on a regular school day. Take your child to the school on fete and open days. Play on the school equipment at weekends if you can. And find some little boys and girls in the area who will be going to the same school and let them play with your children. Then here will be a familiar face or two on the first day..

But most of all relax and make a friend of their teacher. He/she wants them to succeed nearly as much as you do! And let your little one ease him/herself into school. And once they start let them have fun!

[Spiral]

Has anyone read the little book "The Leipzig Connection" by Paolo Lionni (Heron books), its about how the education system was undermined by Rockerfeller funded nutcases following a deranged German psychologist called Wilhelm Wundt, anyone with school aged kids, or who works in education ought to read this little known but fundamental piece of history.

It gives a clear insight into what schools are doing, and more disturbingly, why.

[GarethBKK]

There are good and bad teachers. The bad ones are not interested in developing their professional skills. Curriculum planning and assessment at a central level is absurd, and may even be sinister (thanks for the info, Spiral). Overall, the biggest problem is that education systems see the individual as one million divided by one million. There's another thread on the need to respect introverts https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?42150-For-the-introverts-out-there which I think is relevant to why schools may not work for many individual students.

[pilotsimone]

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[applecrusher1992]

Great Story. Thanks for sharing. My own personal view about home schooling is that the success lies within the parents. There are some parents who home school who don't allows their kids to be creative and follow their passion. And they can be just as manipulated as a kid going to a regular school.

[Vangelo]

I have 19 year old twins who have been through 5 - 6 different schooling environments. This includes years at Montessori, public school, privates schools for gifted kids, homeschooling, charter schools and finally Sudbury Valley School. The story of why, when, where and how is to long and painful to relive. Suffice it to say some issues were caused by the school, their educational philosophy, priorities, bullies and also unfortunate medical issues.

As a result of these experiences, I believe the typical US public school hinders creativity, individuality, passion for learning and responsibility while teaching them to conform to the will of some higher authority.

I also believe that there is no single method that is right for all kids. But I do believe the typical public and private schools are harmful. They dis-empower the children and do not promote independent thought nor a can-do belief in themselves.

I linked the school that my kids graduated from because it was ultimately the best place for them. There are a couple of other schools around the world that are modeled after SVS for those of you who are lucky enough to live near one.

Hope this helps.

Regards,
Vangelo

[ilainie]

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I was smiling with so much happiness as I want through your learning journey. I resonate with you discoveries along the way. I too, am an unschooling parent, fell into it by accident. I didn't know there was a name for what we were doing when we started, but like you, after researching I knew it was the best choice for us too. Now we're 3 years in and the learning opportunities have been numerous both wide and deep. I am so thrilled to see so many other people intuitively following this path and remain inspired to continue.
Blessings!
Lainie Liberti
Raising Miro on the Road of Life

[TWINCANS]

Thanks for sharing. We too homechooled, after trying out the local Waldorf School for a couple of years. We're pretty much done now, as our daughter now takes high school online. We're not too worried how many courses she takes but she's enjoying it and is actually on the Honour Roll.

We started with the idea of an 'enlightened' curriculum but gradually realized that was our own soapbox and relaxed into a more unschooling approach. That being said we did run many teaching coops and my husband still teaches weekly martial arts classes for homeschoolers.

As to socialization, there are many more opportunities for homeschoolers to really connect with other kids. Parents are present and allowing them space to learn and explore relationship at the same time. Most homeschoolers I know are out in groups all the time, on field trips, in coops, and so on. There's never even any hint of bullying because the kids are so uninhibited and in a safe environment.

Schoolkids are sat in seats. In schools it's all about control and kids have no room to explore or make healthy friendships, imho. Bullying occurs because the kids feel abandoned by the adults and they go tribal. And don't even get me started on what they teach - the curriculum is so watered down, unimportant for real life and full of propaganda it's just not worth 6 hrs a day every day.

Homeschooling is a real commitment and not ideal for everyone. But given the schooling situation, the upsides beats the downsides hands down.

[Kindred]

Unfortunately, this piece from George Carlin speaks directly to the state of the US 'educational system', and the Reason it is so poor...

(Warning... profanity)

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=9KReZyAZLI0

I think the OP is headed in the right direction - that of insuring their child has the greatest opportunity to flourish and thrive to the fullest of their potential.

In Unity, Peace and Love

[enfoldedblue]

Posted by pilotsimone (here)
Thank you for all the thoughtful replies.

I'd like to share a very short story about the socialization aspect so many cling to when it comes to schooling...

A family member asked my wife, "Aren't you concerned about his (our son's) socialization with other kids?". My wife gave this response: "Go to your local middle school, junior high, or high school, walk down the hallways, and tell me which behavior you see that you think our son should emulate."

I think that pretty much sums it up for me.

I live in Australia and schools here are likely quite different from American (judging from your comment). When I go to the Steiner school here...I see kids sitting under shady trees, playing music and singing together, or working together to build creative projects. Even at the State school nearby the kid's work passionately together on the school gardens, and cooperation and friendliness seem the norm rather than the exception.

That said there are still many many things that I don't appreciate about both these schools. I think that if someone is thinking about homeschooling the social aspect should be carefully considered and not just brushed off. When I taught art to children, I noticed a big difference between homeschool kids and school kids. The homeschool kids were definitely more mature, but they seemed to find it hard to fit in with the other kids' fun and often seemed like outsiders.

Of course like everything there are no absolutes, and what suits one child, might not be good for another. At the end of the day each parents should assess their child's individual needs and carefully weigh the pros and cons of the educational options and decide what option will best allow their child to flourish.

[mosquito]

Hats off to you Simone and everyone else who's taken this bold step !

[Deborah (ahamkara)]

I read this thread with a slightly different perspective. I returned to grad school in my late 40s to get my Masters in Education. I had worked in High tech (Silicon Valley), and then stayed home to raise 2 children of my own. I now teach 5th grade at an upper middle class public school.

I am aware of the true agenda underlying public education( please, please read John Taylor Gatto), but I have near autonomy in my classroom, as well as the support of an amazing group of parents and an enlightened principal. My classroom is a community of learners. Students learn not just content, but other, more subtle skills- how to coordinate and work together as a team. how to collaborate, how to compromise, how to listen carefully and find common ground with others- some of whom come from radically different cultures and are the product of different family structures. My students learn confidence, they learn that failure is a tough, but unavoidable part of learning. They learn to speak their truth and to hold their ground. They discuss, analyze and discover what it means to be self empowered...All classrooms are not the same. I do a better job developing my students creativity and academic skills than 99% of my parents could. For that one percent, I encourage you to home school. For the others, don't be so sure you are truly preparing your child for the real world. Peace

[CdnSirian]

"Socialisation is the only thing I would worry about with home schooling"...you would like your child to be socialized to --what?

I think that especially in California you have an opportunity to find a large home schooling community. Integrated, not all Christian or focused especially in some way. Groups with sports teams, and many parent coordinated field trips, which you don't get much in public school.

Anyone interested, attend a home schooling convention if you can. A real eye opener!

By the time my child was half way through middle school, I was convinced that any parent with a Grade 8 education could put together a better curriculum than most public schools.

Home schoolers can get through K-12 by the time they're 13-14 yrs. They can then attend a community college for free, if registered as a home-schooling high schooler in a school registered by a home schooling parent or group. So they can do 2 years of college for free, then go on to a university.

Many home schooling parents get their children work permits so the kids work a real job, part time, and the hours get credited to school time. This definitely helps prepare them for the "real world" in a real way.

I don't think home schooling should be used to isolate children. But I believe it is a powerful force, and is the only situation that allows parents control over education (and health choices). Public education is primarily social engineering. Yes, the stellar students get ahead and win awards and make everyone proud. A small minority.