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Thread: College Stress Help For My Son

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    United States Avalon Member WhiteFeather's Avatar
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    Angry College Stress Help For My Son

    Hello Avalonians My Son Mark Whom Is Attending College For Nursing Is Asking The Forum For Some Assistance if possible. Here's My Son LittleFeather With A Dear Request.


    Hello Avalon, My father WhiteFeather is trying to gather expert holistic knowledge on ways to reduce stress and anxiety for me.

    I am 19 years old and a junior at a University taking up Nursing as my major. The second I step foot into a classroom my body numbs up with anxiety and becomes stressed. My hands turn cold, my body and eyes twitch, and I profusely sweat under my armpits. I can also say that I don’t stop itching and picking my nose for some reason. I tried to take a step back and figure why the hell I do this, but the only thing I can think of is that “I get extremely overwhelmed with things that I don’t see or listen to on a day-to-day basis”.

    My father is comfortable right now. He’s been working at his job for over five plus years, he knows the boss, the material, the workload. He doesn’t sweat it because he is used to it. However, I am on the opposite side. I see new lessons everyday, new chapters out of a textbook that I have to thoroughly understand, new ideas I have to come up with for presentations, more thinking to get the best grade I possibly can obtain. Thinking ahead and paying attention are probably the two main things I need to do in order to be successful in this major. What is blocking these two things from happening are ANIXETY and STRESS. To eliminate this problem, I tried something that got my father WhiteFeather upset about.

    I have been taking my sisters “pharmaceutical” anxiety medication HYDROXYZINE and it has been helping. The pill puts me inside a mellow and attentive mood, and I figured that the more mellow I get the more focused I become. Mellow is great for me. When I’m down I don’t become overwhelmed with things, I just float on in an attentive manner. When I am in my sober mind, however, my high level of energy makes my mind seek for distractions and overwhelming sensations.

    What will make me mellow, holistically? What Can I Do. Im seeking some help from you people here before i seek Dr. Frankenstein, as my Dad always says.


    Thank You!
    "Although I Live On This World, I Choose Not To Live In It"
    <:~W.F.~:>

    "The answer to every question can be found in nature, if one knows how to look and listen”
    Gwilda Wiyaka

    "Everything on the Earth has a purpose, Every disease a herb to cure it, and every person a mission. This is the Indian theory of existence".
    Mourning Dove Salish


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    Costa Rica Avalon Member ulli's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Could it be that Mark has picked the wrong path?

    I always thought that when you are on the right track you can't get out of bed fast enough,
    that you enjoy every new day...that your studies absorb you and you end up with endless fresh questions.
    That's what it was like for me at school, with my favorite subjects.
    The main feeling is excitement and hunger for learning more.
    There is love for the teachers.

    When there is anxiety it is a sign of resistance...of not being totally in love with the subject.
    Having to medicate to get through those studies is a symptom of something not being quite right.

    Hmm....

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    United States Avalon Member WhiteFeather's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Quote Posted by ulli (here)
    Could it be that Mark has picked the wrong path?

    I always thought that when you are on the right track you can't get out of bed fast enough,
    that you enjoy every new day...that your studies absorb you and you end up with endless fresh questions.
    That's what it was like for me at school, with my favorite subjects.
    The main feeling is excitement and hunger for learning more.
    There is love for the teachers.

    When there is anxiety it is a sign of resistance...of not being totally in love with the subject.
    Having to medicate to get through those studies is a symptom of something not being quite right.

    Hmm....
    I will let him answer that later on Ulli. Im sure he likes his studys but beats himself up all the time. He pressures himself too much. He is his worst enemy at times.
    "Although I Live On This World, I Choose Not To Live In It"
    <:~W.F.~:>

    "The answer to every question can be found in nature, if one knows how to look and listen”
    Gwilda Wiyaka

    "Everything on the Earth has a purpose, Every disease a herb to cure it, and every person a mission. This is the Indian theory of existence".
    Mourning Dove Salish


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    United States Avalon Member WhiteFeather's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    I often tell him to take a break when studying hard, play your guitar, listen to peaceful music, take a nap, take a shower, a dip in the pool or go outside and relax with nature for a little while. I think he's looking for a holistic herb such as St Johns Wort to calm him down.
    "Although I Live On This World, I Choose Not To Live In It"
    <:~W.F.~:>

    "The answer to every question can be found in nature, if one knows how to look and listen”
    Gwilda Wiyaka

    "Everything on the Earth has a purpose, Every disease a herb to cure it, and every person a mission. This is the Indian theory of existence".
    Mourning Dove Salish


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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Quote Posted by LittleFeather
    I am 19 years old and a junior at a University taking up Nursing as my major. The second I step foot into a classroom my body numbs up with anxiety and becomes stressed. My hands turn cold, my body and eyes twitch, and I profusely sweat under my armpits. I can also say that I don’t stop itching and picking my nose for some reason. I tried to take a step back and figure why the hell I do this, but the only thing I can think of is that “I get extremely overwhelmed with things that I don’t see or listen to on a day-to-day basis”.
    I really don't get the part that I underlined. What do you exactly mean with things you don't see or listen?

    Quote Posted by LittleFeather
    My father is comfortable right now. He’s been working at his job for over five plus years, he knows the boss, the material, the workload. He doesn’t sweat it because he is used to it. However, I am on the opposite side. I see new lessons everyday, new chapters out of a textbook that I have to thoroughly understand, new ideas I have to come up with for presentations, more thinking to get the best grade I possibly can obtain. Thinking ahead and paying attention are probably the two main things I need to do in order to be successful in this major. What is blocking these two things from happening are ANIXETY and STRESS. To eliminate this problem, I tried something that got my father WhiteFeather upset about.
    Why would you even want to get used to such bull****? the fact of the matter is that universities are like concentration camps which suck creativity out of you. Grades are nothing more than a "boogeyman" concept designed by psychotic assholes who can't stand people who have the courage nor the motivation to explore things in their own time, with their own pace. Grades are just an idea designed to make you fall in line with the university programming.

    The way I see it, you need a few things to be successful in your major: surrender your creativity and spontaneity as well as submit to your teachers authority. Is that the kind of success you want? good grades in exchange for your own humanity and potential? Look schooling is about making you anxious and stressful, to make you fearful about not getting a cute grade. Schools can't afford to have relaxed and creative people because then they would be out of business. Why don't you try to explore medicine (modern and other expressions) on your own accord and they try to integrate the useful elements into your own kind of medicine? why not look for people who practice X or Y type of medicine and try to learn directly from them?

    You know there was a black heart surgeon in the USA, Vivien Thomas. Guy had a hard time because when he was alive, racism was a trendy activity. He only finished high school, but the guy went to become one of the top heart surgeons. No universities, no cute accolades, no fancy PHDs. He had direct experience with another surgeon. So I ask you, do you think you really need some university to exploit your potential? to explore that which fascinates you?

    Quote Posted by LittleFeather
    I have been taking my sisters “pharmaceutical” anxiety medication HYDROXYZINE and it has been helping. The pill puts me inside a mellow and attentive mood, and I figured that the more mellow I get the more focused I become. Mellow is great for me. When I’m down I don’t become overwhelmed with things, I just float on in an attentive manner. When I am in my sober mind, however, my high level of energy makes my mind seek for distractions and overwhelming sensations.
    Yeah well it's numbing you, if you keep doing it you'll need larger and larger doses. I can tell that you don't like feeling anxious nor stressed (which is understandable) so if big pharma's sorcery makes you feel a little better for a while, you'll take their magic pills. It's easy to see they are sedating you because when the effect fades away, you come face to face with your fear and anxiety which are legitimate to a degree, the problem is that you have no clue as to how deal with it from what I gather.

    Quote Posted by LittleFeather
    What will make me mellow, holistically? What Can I Do. Im seeking some help from you people here before i seek Dr. Frankenstein, as my Dad always says.
    Well you can try some magic mushrooms and call that holistic numbness...

    In all seriousness, you should spend time with yourself as in alone with no one around to distract you. Ask yourself if Uni is worth it, worth it from a human perspective, not an automaton perspective. Understand that there is something as social conditioning which tells you what you must do, you may find that your anxiety has something to do with it, I'm not saying Social Conditioning is the one and only factor, but I bet it is one of the main factors. Ask yourself what terrifies you in this particular case, the nursing major thing... is it that you are really afraid of new ideas and content? maybe that's a rationalization and one of the true roots has something to do with the fact that you are afraid of not getting good grades.

    Those are the kind of questions you should ask yourself and think deeply about. A psychoanalysis of sorts, done by you and for you.
    And since this has something to do with University aka Schooling, I'd say getting to know the dynamics, well the true dynamics of schooling can be an ingredient for your holistic medicine. Check out John Taylor Gatto's website: https://www.johntaylorgatto.com/

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    United States Avalon Member spiritguide's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Any crutch is just a crutch. Ask who is in charge if not him. Anxiety is from fear usually unfounded. (fear of fear) Hematite crystal is used for grounding and can be kept on the person to accomplish this.

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    Ireland Avalon Member Poly Hedra's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    I had the same problem. I moved to the UK to go to university. I moved into student accommodation and found the whole experience so overwhelming. I loved the course but I found it harder and harder to deal with the anxiety that was building up and up. I stopped going to college. I would get really anxious at the thought of leaving my room. I would freeze up and just sit there frozen with fear and dread. I eventually left the course. What happened is I was in a new situation, everything was becoming very hard to deal with. I was convinced that I was in the wrong place. I left the course and moved away. It took me at least 6 months to figure out what had happened. I regret leaving the course but I didnt have a choice. I also think that experience was there to teach me about myself. I suffered all my life with social anxiety and I had no idea. I realise that Littlefeather might be experiencing a different kind of anxiety but anxiety is anxiety. My opinion is that the stress of college is an outward symptom of the anxiety felt. There are a lot of free recordings online and websites that tell you all about the kind of anxious feelings and thoughts that stop a person from getting on with their life.
    My advice is to deal with this problem as anxiety, not as a problem with college. Meditation, guided meditation expressly designed to deal with anxiety. Once you realise that the issue is not the world around you but its about how you talk to yourself.
    IOnce I figured out that I suffered from anxiety I was able to deal with it by doing research and understanding that the fear and dread can disappear through understanding the issue of anxiety. I'm a different person now, confident and positive. my two cents. best of luck to you Littlefeather :/
    Last edited by Poly Hedra; 13th September 2012 at 01:02.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    The one and only answer: lol

    Tell your son to listen to this video completely, a few times. This is one of the greatest hypnotherapist that has existed (notice he is in wheelchair, he was crippled). Littlefeather, notice the women who was Erikson's daughter in law and who was doing her Master degree, having no talent for writing. Littlefeather, now find a good hypnotherapist of reputation and for little money, you will go through school like if it were a light pleasant breeze. Everything to succeed easily is already in you littlefeather, it will easily get out, in full peace and relaxation.

    Here Milton Erikson

    Last edited by Flash; 13th September 2012 at 01:12.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    I went from a steady, 15 year long "diet" of Paxil and Welbutrin (up to 2 per day for each) to zero about three years ago. The main thing that I changed in my lifestyle was that I adopted the practice of "mindful meditation". I was introduced to it by my psychiatrist, at my request. I've done a lot of exploring since then about the various ways to meditate and have become a firm believer in meditation's efficacy in reducing stress, among other things. Just searching "relaxation meditation" will yield tons of sites for you to investigate. You will surely find a method that suits you.

    Be well!

    Namaste

    Brian

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Mark I really feel for you. I did a bachelor's in nursing before pursuing a advanced medical degree and I also thought joining the marines couldn't be as hard as nursing school. I swear they plan it that way just to weed out the weak.

    I wish that I knew if you are attending college for the first time or if you have been in college and just now getting into nursing. I'm curious whether you are having first time college jitters or just because the nursing programs are the way they are.

    Regardless, a great way to relax is to try to meditate on the root cause of your anxiety. Are you nervous about the fast pace of the learning, do you have a teacher that calls on you and you are afraid you may not not the answers, do you just feel overwhelmed by college in general, etc. ?

    I will say that everyone who enters a nursing program feels overwhelmed at first. The average person just does not understand how much there is to take in during the very first semester. Some suggestions that I would make is remember to breath when you enter the room. If you can get to your class about 15 minutes early. Choose a seat relatively close to the door so that you will get fresh air from the hallway and not feel trapped in the room. During the time you are waiting for class to start DEEP BREATHE!! I mean really DEEP BREATHE!! Suck in air through your nose and imagine that you are smelling the most beautiful rose, hold onto the air in your lungs for as long as you can, then blow it out hard like you are blowing out a big candle, long and slow until your lungs are empty. Do this several time before the class begins and self hypnotize yourself while doing this by repeating affirmative things to yourself like, "I've got this", "I will remain relaxed and enjoy what I am about to learn today", etc. Repeat to yourself as many times as you need to until you start to believe it.

    The next recommendation is make friends in the class. The good support that I got from a couple of people i got to know made school so much better. They don't have to be people that you hang out with after class, or even talk to any other time. However, having people to compare notes with, study with, commiserate with, etc. is so invaluable. Believe me you are not the only one that feels like you do.

    That being said the next thing you need to do is STOP TAKING YOUR SISTERS MEDICATION. Number one Hydroxyzine is a med that you should be getting monitored for when taking it. Also, if anyone at school found out that you were taking a med that you do not have a RX for you would be kicked out of the program. There are many holistic ways to deal with stress. I like the hypnosis suggestion that Flash advised. Also, check out the Health Food stores for aromatherapy sticks. These are herbal formulas like lavender, that come in an inhalant stick that you can sit in class and smell to help with relaxation.

    The best way to feel less overwhelmed though is to read the material that you will be covering in class prior to the class so that when you are sitting listening to the lecture it will not be the first time you hearing it. Nothing is more mind blowing than having a lot of medical terminology flung at you and you have no idea what a teacher is talking about. You start to feel like "WHAT??!!! You must study in advance and be prepared for whatever you are going to learn in each class. Read your syllabus and study ahead of time.

    I hope these suggestions have helped. Please feel free to PM me if I can help in any other way.
    Last edited by Amysenthia; 13th September 2012 at 01:40.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Quote Posted by ulli (here)
    Could it be that Mark has picked the wrong path? .
    Hello Mark and WhiteFeather,

    Before I read any more posts below (I don't want to be influenced.), this was first impression I got as soon as I began reading "I am 19 years old and a junior at a University taking up Nursing as my major. The second I step foot into a classroom my body numbs up with anxiety and becomes stressed. My hands turn cold, my body and eyes twitch, "

    There's a good chance that it's not your path, Mark. I will sleep on it and see if something else comes up. But I suspect you have your own answers.

    Peace,
    WhiteCrowBlackDeer

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    I agree with those suggesting that perhaps the 'path' you have chosen is not the one that would suit you best. Can you take a break for a while without losing your place?-- I know this is possible in my country, and if you decide on a change you would be able to use subjects completed successfully as credit in another course. It is very important to choose something that is your own passion, otherwise studying will become a chore and not an exciting discovery, and, as the course will lead to a career, it is best if your course is something you really want to do for the ret of your life.

    Taking time to volunteer, to explore opportunities and form friendships will often help people to make a life choice they had not thought of before. Think about what your strengths are-- does your present course allow you to use these areas? Above all remain positive that things will improve, and read Amysthensia's post. It has some very sound suggestions.

    Also please stop taking other people's medicine, and, if you feel medication will help you, visit a doctor who can assess you and your own needs.
    Last edited by Ellisa; 13th September 2012 at 02:16.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    I wish Mark well. Nursing is a good choice as it will get him a job, unlike studying Psychology, for example. I had a job at my University Admin, and I saw the passing grades of surgeons - most only got 51%! Mark may not be skilled at studying, and don't worry as the nursing work he does when he graduates will be different to the rote-learning he does now. Just hang in there Mark!
    "There will be in the next generation or so a pharmacological method [FLOURIDE, ANTI-DEPRESANTS…] of making people love their servitude and producing dictatorship without tears… producing a kind of painless concentration camp for entire societies so that people will in fact have their liberties taken away from them but will rather enjoy it [AFTER 9/11]." - Aldous Huxley 1961 speech:"Contented with your servitude"

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Great that 'Littlefeather' can open up like this, especially with his dad. I've been studying or working in universities my entire life. They are temples, but often the initiate is unprepared. When my material world fell part in my mid-forties I realised that I had forgotten how to breathe. I re-learned breathing through the autogenics method. I realised that I couldn't remember the last time I had breathed properly. Autogenics then led to mediation and Qi-gong and .. well ... it's a long story. My suggestion is to learn to control your breathing. Start by exhaling slowly through your mouth for as long as you can.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Hi Littlefeather

    You are going to get many responses as those so far and will have much to contemplate!

    My suggestion is to quiet self and hear what it is you are not wanting to hear and chances are you already know but do not trust what your higher awareness is intuiting to you. Risk is scary business but in the end a real backbone builder.

    Change is a bugger, but the transition time is a bitch and a challenge that can make one strong and a whole lot wiser if one can make it through the journey.

    Remember also that life is a journey so don't sweat the small stuff.>>>>>Blessings : )
    Love and Light Always/Sandy

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    stress relief for Speeches is looking out over a crowd and imagining them neikkid...

    wonder if it too much of a distraction for a 19 yo to do the same to everyone in the classroom...


    maybe holding your breath and counting backwards from 100 to 0 before exhaling...



    but seriously now,

    have him perform this exercise every day before entering the classroom...



    I guarantee he won't be nervous after that...
    Last edited by Rocky_Shorz; 13th September 2012 at 05:38.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Go to YouTube and search on 'relaxation anxiety'.
    There is a lot of stuff there that might help.
    Love, HS

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    Avalon Member meeradas's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Get out of mind somehow.
    [No drugs]
    Last edited by meeradas; 13th September 2012 at 07:56.

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    Germany Avalon Member christian's Avatar
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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    You can try this fear-processing exercise.

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    Default Re: College Stress Help For My Son

    Dear Mark,

    The result of anxiety is a tension in the subtle body. It is felt as a tension in the head heart or gut region. The inner wind at the navel ( to be more precise four finger widths below the navel) called the downward wind, rises to to upper areas and cause anxiety. Here is a video that explains a little more.



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