"...they were all basically more or less the same in the beginning, and then they’ve gone off and because of their separate tracks, the separateness of their histories, the differences of their history... by the way, they’re all about the same age. And you have… all of a sudden you have 12 or 15 thetan (the being, the spirit, you) backgrounds which have 12 or 15 different characteristics.
"And so it doesn’t matter whether you have the so-called Caucasian or the Aztec race... it doesn’t matter a doggone which one of these... you pick up, you’ll find out really what’s important about him is… which one of the thetan races does he fall into... and actually in terms of interpersonal relationships. These guys are trained in a particular and cruelty way. And I don’t care whether you’re in the heart of Africa or any place else.
"...There’s the Snake Men, there’s the Invaders – I won’t bother putting them down. You’ll recognize them one of these days. I’ll have to make up a table. I’ve got to do this research myself. I haven’t picked up this research. I’ve… I can do all the job they should have done over the last 80 million years here in the last couple, but I… I… it takes a little time.
"…you’ve got your Invader People. You’ve got a crew of… well, let me tell you the classifications they fall into here. A lot of your entertainers and uh… some of the bigger sparks that you run into are Fifth Invader people or one of the Invader Force people. These guys come in from Lord knows where; they’re picked up in certain groups, sometimes picked up for a certain capability. They’re trained in one way or another, and they’ll hit planets, and so on, sort of all at once. Hit ‘em in various and peculiar ways.
"And uh… they’ve been through enough hell and high water that when they get… by the time they’ve gotten here, they’re pretty well convinced their power’s shot. And they have… they feel pretty degraded. They don’t feel like they’re worth a shucks. They don’t feel like they can use any energy. They feel like they’ve got to hold this back. They usually have a pretty good imagination.
"...and with these people you will find ‘hands’ produce quite a drop (needle movement in an electro psychometer). You don’t even have to know, see, why ‘hands’ produce this drop… so these characters have run into the cops and… and they’ve gotten their hands bashed up... You’d find out something was wrong with their hands, or they had an emotion about hands… you’d also find out that they were pretty hepped on the subject of… on the second dynamic[sex]. They’re quivery and upset about it... they have certain goals and plans. We’re not even interested in those. We’re just interested in this fact. And what’s the next thing?... you find out that darkness is a keynote. They’re hiding. That darkness has a great value to them. They want to hide in that darkness.
"All right, you take your Snake Man... Where this becomes interesting is in terms of behavior. And you don’t care about that either. Your Snake Man’s going around… he’s very quiet. He wants you to prove everything. Prove, prove, prove, prove. And if there’s any gadget made under the sun which is mechanical... he’s bound to find it and turn it out – somehow or other. Prove, prove, prove, prove.
Another one’s the Cat People. God knows where the Cat People came from. Lord! Lord! Lord! These people are sure lost. Most of them are mad as hatters. And they have huge, huge, often slanted… eyes... they’ll make the [body] grow very thin. And the eyes will be big and quite often uh… uh… very feline. And they’re lost. They don’t know where they are. And they kinda look like cats. And they’ll talk to you about catbirds from some place or another... And then there are other people who are similar to that; but aren't part of the Cat People, because to be a good valid cat person one of the first requisites is to be strictly fruitcake and very thin. They’re really lost. I don’t know who got hold of the Cat People or where or brought them in to the track, but they spin as quick as you look at them.
"You’ve known some of them, I’m sure. They’re kind of: sweet and they’re kind of anxious to help, and they’re kind of starry-eyed and they’re not very forceful – they’re very weak. And uh… all of a sudden, if – you were to tell one of them suddenly that he couldn’t possibly be of any help, you can just watch him spin right on the spot.
"And then, as we go on from there, we find the guys that you would just swear to GOD had never had anything to do with thetans. You’d just: swear it! They become two types of individual here on Earth: They become the Capitalista, the Commissar, the Nazi police chief – they’re all the same breed. Hold on!“ They’ve got to pull everything in on ‘em... But how do you cure it? By getting them to throw something away – a toothpick. You’ll find out immediately they wouldn’t let go’ of anything; that’s the first thing you’ll find out about ‘em. And that tells you immediately that they belong to that nebulous race.
"Now, then here’s your Monitor People. The female of that species we’ve decided to call the Merrimacks... this is peculiar to a lot of these other races, so it isn’t a singular test – these people love to wear ‘hornrimmed spectacles’. If you could let them go around with ‘spornrimmed hecticles’ on and no glasses in them, they’d be happy... But don’t mention insects to these people because they’ll ordinarily just go off the pin. They’ve got something to do with insects. I don’t know what. These people are quite salvageable, by the way. But they’re organizers, par excellence. And you’ll find them out in the society doing terrific jobs of organization. None of these people, you understand, are bad. This is peculiarities. And boy, you’ll find these in the Brown Race and the Black Race and the Yellow Race and everything else. You’ll find these same characters. They came down and did a spread.
"Now those are just a few… they are just a few of these. Oh, yes-yes! Yes. There’s your wide-open case. The wide-open case, who is quite often found a beautiful bodied girl. They are very often very wide open. And you couldn’t possibly imagine how there could be anything wrong with these people... and they’ve got a different lot of other things, and they are almost perfect at espionage; they may not realize it but they’re trained espionage people. You could just start giving them an examination that would be given standardly to an espionage officer and they will answer up perfectly on every line... although they’re wide open and very pretty as bodies, they’re sudden death. They’re right over there against death... I don’t know where they come from, or who they’re spying for. It’s a big, big joke. I don’t know who they are. I’d find out if they were dangerous, they aren’t... And although their wide openness is terrific, their sense of reality is just shot! Terribly bad sense of reality. Awful! Just grim!
"... You’ll find out the one thing your wide open case can’t do is face any prior existence. Under no circumstances! This just throws them into horrors. You say, "You might have lived before,“ and all of a sudden this case starts to go neeowww! Spin! Gee! They… I don’t know why that is but it’s just there. Peculiarities – lots of peculiarities one way or the other in all of this. But you look for ‘cant’s’.
"...The Invader boys present a hard case, mostly because they start feeling very degraded. And there are several crews of those, by the way. There’s not just one crew. And all of them feel more or less degraded. But the third battalion of the Fifth Invader Force is practically out through the bottom of the chute... It’s a level of degradation you never heard of, yet they might be operating quite well. They’re, by the way, terribly effective here on Earth as revolutionaries."
Philadelphia doctorate Course:
On Auditing: How to Succeed/Fail, Assess
A Lecture given by L. Ron Hubbard
on the 13. December 1952
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