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Thread: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

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    Scotland Avalon Member greybeard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    a said
    "And, it may even bring to the surface something in me,
    more gentle, loving and caring, motherly energies..."
    Oh I see that in you annemirri.
    Thank you for your kind comments.
    I really enjoy singing.
    My neighbor is enthusiastic too, said " It sure scares the mice away" Lol
    Scots have a several saying to keep people from getting an inflated ego.
    "He is no better than he should be"
    "He is getting above himself"
    " I will put his gas down to a peep"
    We as a nation tend to self depreciate, which is a shame.
    Love
    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by greybeard (here)
    Scots have a several saying to keep people from getting an inflated ego.

    "He is no better than he should be" "He is getting above himself"
    " I will put his gas down to a peep"
    We as a nation tend to self depreciate, which is a shame.
    Very much like finns, my mother used to scare me by saying

    " those who lift themselves above others, God will bring down "

    and I was so good and shy, I tried to make myself invisible,
    once one old lady asked me to board the bus before her, and I did,
    as I had been on the bus stop before her,
    but afterwards I was so afraid that I had done something very wrong,
    going before an old person,
    that I hid under my bed all evening, worrying that my mother would find out and punish me!

    a.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by annemirri (here)
    Very much like finns, my mother used to scare me by saying

    " those who lift themselves above others, God will bring down "

    and I was so good and shy, I tried to make myself invisible,
    once one old lady asked me to board the bus before her, and I did,
    as I had been on the bus stop before her,
    but afterwards I was so afraid that I had done something very wrong,
    going before an old person,
    that I hid under my bed all evening, worrying that my mother would find out and punish me!

    a.
    I can identify with your story annemirri.
    My life as a child was filled with fear.
    Im glad im free of that and my five children grew up with a positive childhood and to the best of my knowledge did not experience the nameless fears I encountered.
    Have three well adjusted grandchildren too, I count my blesings.
    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by greybeard (here)
    I

    My life as a child was filled with fear.
    Do you want to hear why I am that fearless person ?

    When I was a little child my father used to say MANY TIMES that he is going to kill us all,
    especially if my mother file for divorce.

    So, my mother did,
    and my sister's schoolfriend's father killed all his three children as their mother wanted a divorce....

    so I was scared to dead ! I could not talk to anyone as my mother did not want anyone to know anything that was going on in our family....

    One day I came home from the school, I was fourteen, and we got a call from the hospital
    saying that my mother was there...half conscious.

    We went to see her, my father had beaten her very badly...
    But, we, me and my sisters, did not even feel sorry for her !

    at that point we realized that she, my mother deserved all that,
    my father was not that violent person at all, only his words,
    and there is always two parts, the victim may well be the cause for all that...

    so, I got tired of living in fear, if I fear something it will happen, if I don't, it won't.

    a.
    Last edited by annemirri; 22nd April 2010 at 22:21.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Ego could be defined as whatever covers up basic goodness. From an experiential point of view, what is ego covering up? It's covering up our experience of just being here, just fully being where we are, so that we can relate with the immediacy of our experience. Egolessness is a state of mind that has complete confidence in the sacredness of the world. It is unconditional well being, unconditional joy that includes all the different qualities of our experience.

    - Pema Chodron

    Unity Consciousness
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Free your mind, and open your heart to LOVE.
    You'll then become enlightened able to just BE.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by truthseekerdan (here)
    [CENTER]
    Dan,
    you did not get it, there is no reason to post "back to topic", or did it hit too near ?

    My father must have been an ego driven man,
    for his ego family was very important, so that is why he was threatening to kill us all,
    not out of his badness or madness,( and he did not even drink.)
    but out of fear losing us.

    or maybe he just loved us too much,

    as it turned out that my mother was the real ego driven person,
    she was all the time complaining, nagging, as my father did not behave the way she wanted him to, she wanted social status.

    a.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Good morning a,
    you are of course right we attract that which we fear.
    Its good that fear is no more.
    With love Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Scotland Avalon Member greybeard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    I see it very simple and I talk for myself here.
    If I want to know something about a subject I go to an expert.
    If I want to know how to become a good dinghy racer I read books by people who have competed at the highest level not someone who has read about it.
    If I want to have a nice garden I read books by gardeners not some one who is an expert dinghy racer who happens to have a garden that he works with occasionally.
    If my life is devoted to finding the answer to question "Who am I?" then I read books by those who are enlightened.
    If I want enlightenment than I listen to those who are in that state not talking about it.

    Those who are enlightened uniformly say the same thing, the ego needs to be transcended in order to know that which you are.
    The ego would have you believe something quite different
    We are all aspects of God and therefore One with that which created us.
    I believe them when they say this..

    There is another very important reason for reading books by these souls.
    The words in the books are carrier waves of the spiritual vibration of enlightenment and thus raise the spiritual vibration of anyone who reads them.
    A book by an author who is not enlightened may be helpful in the early stages of personal spiritual growth but lack the energy that the word of the enlightened author has.

    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Ego is not your Self

    Please enjoy the following extract of a talk by Shri Mataji Nirmala Devi, founder of Sahaja Yoga.
    This talk took place on the 22nd October 1979 in London.

    Unity Consciousness
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Free your mind, and open your heart to LOVE.
    You'll then become enlightened able to just BE.

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    Exclamation Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    A False Self Image.

    • The ego is one's false-self-image.
    • Its not something real that one can hold in hands or take a picture of.
    • It is just like a reflection to which one is made to identify with.
    • In this sense...it can be compared to a reflection on a mirror.

    One's Emotional Goalkeeper.

    • The ego does the job of allowing only some emotions to pass through while labeling the others as bad and resisting them.
    • The ego-cares for you. It thinks that had it not been for its resistance, interference, manipulations and so on...one would be nowhere.
    • The result...the ego tries to resists some emotions which according to the popular opinion i.e. social conditioning is considered as "bad".
    • According to the ego life is going to be ideal/perfect only when ABC happens and that anything other, let's say XYZ should not happen.

    MOMENTS when the ego takes roots.

    • "If you do this you are a good boy or else a bad boy."
    • "Look at JOHN, does he trouble his parents (like you)?"
    • "I wish you were like him."
    • "You are lazy." (an absolute statement)
    • "You are stupid."
    • "You are brilliant" (as compared to others).
    • "You should be like this." (you are not good enough the way you are now)
    • "Life should be lead like this." (Life is not perfect the way it is right now)
    • "You are a good boy."
    • "I don't know when you will be matured."
    • "It is good you are not like him."
    • "Thank GOD you are not like the other boys/girls in this society."

    Survival strategies for the ego.

    Resistance to what is:
    • The present moment is not at all perceived as good by the ego.
    • It has to be manipulated, changed, moved away, escaped and so on for the ego.
    • The ego actually cannot survive for long under the rays of "What is".
    • And so...it constantly denies and resists the "What is".
    • For the ego...life is all about the past and the future.


    Brooding over the past.

    • I guess this is self-explanatory.
    Strategising for the future. This may not always be planning which is an intelligent activity. It involves living in a dream-world built up of its own thoughts. Thinking, Thinking, Thinking. Thinking is the favorite game as well as the life-blood of the ego. Believe it or not...without thinking...the ego may not be able to survive within one, even for a single week. Thinking shields a person from the exposure to "What is".

    THE EGO HATES.
    • Allowing things to be just as they are.
    • It only understands manipulation and tampering with stuffs, be it relationships or a journey or your present moment etc.
    • BEING. The ego doesn't even understand being. (Yet the moments that one truly cherishes in life are the moments in which there was no doing but just being. It may be during a first kiss, or first love or during a sexual orgasm and so on).
    • Surrender.The ego wants a confirmation to everything. It may play a victim to life, but surrender? Nope!
    • The NOW moment. The food of the ego as well as its structure consists of time i.e past and future(this has got nothing to do with the clock time).
    • The thought of being in the NOW also strikes terror for the ego.
    • Time, thinking, doing, achieving thats all it wants.
    • Silence. The ego wants constant chatter, something to chew always, some clatter, some noise, some activity and so some noise. It cannot tolerate silence even for a minute.
    Unity Consciousness
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Free your mind, and open your heart to LOVE.
    You'll then become enlightened able to just BE.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Hi Dan you hve really put a lot of thought into this and it is undeniably true.
    Thanks
    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Most people confuse the ego with self esteem which is healthy.
    The ego is very subtle.
    I will give an example.
    The thought "my" applied to virtually anything is divisive and judgmental.

    My team won!!!
    Oh did you score the goal?
    No.
    When one is attached to the result - my team won or lost, then elation or misery follows.
    If you dont identify strongly with the team then you are free to enjoy the skill involved regardless of which side wins.
    It seems so innocent but in this civilized country Scotland it is not so long ago that if you wore the "wrong" color of scarf you risked being beat up stabbed killed.
    Celtic football colors green - Rangers blue-- tribal virtually.
    In Ireland Catholic vs Protestant.
    My religion vs yours -- where does God stand in this -- not at all.
    Judgment is not for us.
    One can take pride in athletic accomplishment thats different - one can honor a team or player - thats different.

    No one stands alone.

    Another thought.
    I had beans out of a can last night. I paused to wonder just how many people were in involved in getting "my" supper to me. Hundreds was as close as I could get.
    I am dependent on many others for something as simple as having beans for supper.
    Then there was the gas supply the cooker the pan the plate the knife the fork-- the washing up, its endless. Thats just one small part of the day.

    The ball cant go in the net without the team getting it to the striker and on it goes.
    There wouldent even be a game with out the other team.
    So there is uniqueness but not separation in this world.
    Uniqueness is a function, thats what I do, its not really what I am.
    The ego forgets all this and is hell bent on proving that we are separate, different is a function a said, not the same as uniqueness, I do things in a unique way so it is still an action, a function. Function come and go, the real "I" remains constant.
    We are all waves of the same Divine ocean when we realize this, war hatred, revenge, anger, will be things of the past.

    Only through realizing what is happening in "my" personal life can I make a difference. Only when I realize that I am listening to the ego and being influenced negatively by it, can I be free to really enjoy life with all its uniqueness.
    Not easy to transcend the ego,
    Is that worthwhile worth the effort involved?
    I want peace, harmony, respect, for all?
    Yes?
    Then it makes sense to do what ever it takes.
    With respect
    Chris
    Last edited by greybeard; 25th April 2010 at 10:52.
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    A Course in Miracles is good.
    It says "People are never angry for the reason they think they are angry"

    There are no accidents in the universe.
    DH says that everything that ever happened -- the totality of it brings about this moment. Thats Karma.
    Our acceptance or non acceptance of what is--- thats free will--- that sets the potential for the next moment and therfore karma also.
    WE change our thoughts, we change our actions, we change karma.
    Sometimes the unpleasant has to come up to be released.
    Thats God shaking our foundations as you quoted Dan.
    Our thoughts, words and deeds, and our intention (Intention sets the context the very meaning of the action) mitigate past and future karma.
    We raise our spiritual vibration and to begin with all that is not aligned with our new vibration comes up to be released.
    So at first it can seem that we are going backwards rather than forwards.
    What was once acceptable in us and to us is now uncomfortable to live with and that discomfort moves us on to higher vibration.
    We are in the crucible being purified just now, the impurities are being burnt off. Not easy.
    Eckhart said "This life time is like going through three life times at once"
    Thats my understanding of the moment.
    Peace to all.
    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Ego transcending

    This prayer first thing in the morning.

    "Beloved God I am born now from the womb of sleep.
    I am determined to dedicate all acts this day as offerings to you with you ever present before my minds eye.
    Make my words thoughts and deeds sacred and pure.
    Let me not injure anyone let no one injure me.
    Guide me direct me this day"

    Now the ever present bit is too much to expect but God is there even if you are not aware of it.


    Food you can say a silent grace only takes moments.

    Any dedication only takes seconds. "I offer this act to you beloved God" thats it.

    In bed first a few moments running through the day with gratitude.
    Leave meditation aside time being unless you really feel up to it

    Now the final prayer.

    "The acts of this day who's burden I placed upon you this morning are now over.
    It was You who made me walk and talk and think and act.
    I therefore place at Thy feet all my words thoughts and deeds.
    Receive me now, I am coming home to Thee.

    If you have a problem falling asleep this is what works --always.

    I have a beaded "necklace" cant remember the proper name. 108 beads.
    I do 3 Om's; close my eyes and in my head do the mantra - Om Nama-Shivia.
    Its rare that I get a full rotation 108 beads.
    I awake refreshed in the morning, beads still in hand.

    Even if all you can do is the morning and evening prayer you will find a difference within a month.
    Mind no expectation, the joy is in the moment just doing it out of love for The Beloved.

    With Love
    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by greybeard (here)
    Most people confuse the ego with self esteem which is healthy.
    The ego is very subtle.
    I will give an example.
    Dear Chris, I will post here what found to be relevant info about this topic from the collective consciousness we call Internet.

    There's a lot of talk about "self esteem", how to have it, what it is, what it means. However, what passes for self esteem is often simply ego. That might seem a perplexing statement. First let's get a little clarity on what healthy self esteem is. It is a balanced and unexaggerated self respect and self love. It combines a healthy regard for the self with a healthy regard for others. Healthy self esteem esteems others as equally as the self. Others are treated and regarded as respectfully as the self.

    Ego, on the other hand, always believes in its own self importance above the importance of others. Ego always requires outside approval, validation, and constant attention and gratification. Ego believes in its own superiority above all others. Some versions of ego insist on inferiority as a role. Both inferiority and superiority are lies though, and variations of the same theme -- of feeling "less than" others. Here are some ways to recognize ego and distinguish it from self esteem:

    1.) It's ego when we are condescending, rude or disrespectful of wait staff, retail clerks, parking valets, or anyone we imagine is "less important" than us. Those with healthy self esteem are respectful to all they come into contact with.

    2.) It's ego when we use anger to manipulate others, get our way, or attempt to communicate our supposed superiority. Those with healthy self esteem have healthy boundaries and desire to communicate respectfully and non-manipulatively.

    3.) Ego is about the one note song, "mi, mi, mi". When we talk incessantly about ourselves and show no interest in others that comes from ego. A person with healthy self esteem does not need to be the center of attention at all times. Healthy self esteem is more frequently expressed by showing genuine interest in others, and making sure conversation flows among all participants.

    4.) When we are expressing ego, we are spectacularly lacking in compassion. We judge harshly, show no empathy, and find fault easily. When we are expressing healthy self esteem, we are able to be compassionate without being codependent (unable to set healthy boundaries, "people pleaser"). We are able to understand the viewpoints of others and have a genuine interest in them.

    5.) When we are being egotistical, we believe we know everything about everything and that we are right about everything we "know". We believe that the opinions of others are "stupid", ill-advised and just plain wrong. When we are coming from healthy self esteem, we are willing to hear the opinions of others and we're able to entertain the notion that their opinion is their opinion and we don't have to agree. Both people can be right (and OK).

    6.) When we are coming from ego, we are unwilling to pay the least attention to the interests of others. We single mindedly expect everyone to share our interests, but don't reciprocate. When we have healthy self esteem, we are curious about the interests of others. Even if we don't want to actually share the interest, we want to share their delight in their interest.

    7.) Impatience is frequently a sign we are expressing from ego. Often, it derives from feeling self important and that the world owes us attention (or priority) whenever we want it. Sometimes our impatience is actually the result of our own failures such as not leaving in enough time to get somewhere and being highly impatient in traffic. When we're coming from healthy self esteem, we have highly developed patience and we live our lives strategically enough that we don't waste our time in situations that require extreme patience.

    There is a huge difference between ego and healthy self esteem. The most significant thing is that when we are coming from ego, it is obvious to everyone but us!
    Unity Consciousness
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Free your mind, and open your heart to LOVE.
    You'll then become enlightened able to just BE.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Hi Dan
    this is really good.
    Much appreciated.
    love chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Thank you greybeard, I think the ego is mainly a result of being trapped an entire lifetime in "one" body, for most; the effect is single mindedness, at least for the average person just trying to get along in life, facing challenges everyday, sometimes enormous challenges, and being so preoccupied with life itself, its difficult to think outside that "one" mind, it never seems like there is enough time or energy, except for the few 5% in the world who are extremely privileged and free, now 'they' have no excuses for single mindedness.

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Quote Posted by Majorion (here)
    Thank you greybeard, I think the ego is mainly a result of being trapped an entire lifetime in "one" body, for most; the effect is single mindedness, at least for the average person just trying to get along in life, facing challenges everyday, sometimes enormous challenges, and being so preoccupied with life itself, its difficult to think outside that "one" mind, it never seems like there is enough time or energy, except for the few 5% in the world who are extremely privileged and free, now 'they' have no excuses for single mindedness.
    Thanks for your Input Majorion.
    Love Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Scotland Avalon Member greybeard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    Id like to share my thoughts of the moment.
    I am aware that I exist, that truth is unchanging, that is an ultimate truth.
    Solid so to speak, eternal.
    Truth is unchanging anything that comes and goes is not ultimate truth.
    That which looks through these eyes is not changed in any way since the moment I first opened my eyes as a baby.
    My body grows older stiffer, old age comes not alone, but I experience in the same was as ever I have.
    I dont feel any different. I dont recognize that which I see in the mirror as me.
    Thoughts come and go so they cant be me.
    Ideas come and go, experiences come and go, emotions fluctuate, so they cant be me.
    I am aware that I witness all these events in life, they are just passing by.
    I am not moving, I am eternal unmoving, witnessing.
    I have a front seat in the play of this life.
    I see my persona interacting but I am not involved or affected by any outcome, yet compassion arises.
    There are many paradoxes on the spiritual path.
    Many things are not personal, awareness is just happening, I cant stop it.
    Thoughts arise, I didnt ask for them, I dont feed them now so there are less of them.
    I appreciate the body I inhabit, I appreciate many things, I can laugh at what Chris does, Im aware that Chris is a persona that has been formed through genes, culture, DNA, programing, life itself. Yet I am unchanged.
    So who am I?
    Or more precisely what am I?
    All I know for sure is that I exist and in essence have not changed.
    Opinions appreciated.

    Chris
    Be kind to all life, including your own, no matter what!!

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    Default Re: Enlightenment: The Ego, what is it? How to transcend it.

    what am I


    the moon and the sun

    the mind and the spirit

    when the sun is eclipsed by the moon

    when the spirit is eclipsed by the mind

    it gets dark

    the mind must give way to the spirit

    spontaneous illustrious spirit

    forever fresh and always new

    engaging neverending now

    shining zeal and zest like the sun


    I am light as a thousand suns

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