Some strange feelings I had lately

[pyrangello]

Good Morning. well I got up this morning and fed the chickens some apples from a cider mill, there is snow falling this morning just for this weekend. But what a serenity of a feeling standing in the yard having pure white snow falling around you, a lab pup wagging its tail at you because she is happy and watching the ducks eat the apples to . So so nice and here is a center morning of peace and yes I felt it and still do.

I read everyone's comments from the Avalon family, boy we sure do have some wonderful people here don't we . I will say this during that last full moon we had my neighbor works at the courthouse, oh the stories but that particular night one guy stood in the road and dared people to hit him. A bunch of people went off the rails during this time. And Aurvandil , I'm am employer,I've employed over 600 people in my lifetime, I have 2 guys that I worked with now, one for 28 years and 1 for 10 years. For this entire summer both of these individuals have been temper flared at the least little moment, like loaded cannons. Usually I don't put up with anything like this but right after the full moon I came to terms with the fact that I am being sucked dry by this negative energy around me everyday and it was only then I decided I'll take charge again and change what I need to and remove that negative energy from around me everyday. So just as Avi, you already recognize the situation ,your half way there, now its just time you pull up your bootstraps and make the changes yourself. Don't get sucked into the vortex, its a place where everyone there is unhappy and they love company. Just take charge of yourself and find your direction and make it happen, Can't doesn't exist !

So now that I have dove back into the ball of goo this morning , I'm going back outside in the snow, peace and puppy wagging its tail for a few moments to get centered and yes move in my direction today, gonna be a good day . Hope that helps.

[Lifebringer]

You might be in the negative energy purge stage that occurs when you've recognized all thats wrong and desire/want/decide to help/intent to make it better for the future of this world, through Creator/you."

[Lifebringer]

"Ye old ups and downs, in the bumpy road/birthing of love in humanity's evolutionary cycle of the heart. Easier to learn to hate, the challenge is to learn and practice from within that lesson of compassion for all, no matter how small.

[cursichella1]

There's absolute power just in recognizing things are wrong.

Although it may seem hopeless at times (and I believe we've all been there, it comes with the territory), imagine others who are floating through life absolutely clueless about what's happening around them and to them.

Your unique position of seeing gives you more control over your life than you may realize.

Embrace that and continue in the direction of creating the life and world you desire for yourself and others. As I see it, by joining like-minded people as you have on Avalon, you empower yourself. You are already positively influencing others (just by starting this thread).

[Avi]

Thank you all for so much kind words

I think my first post had a little too much negative emotions and hopelessness...but the negativity I was talking about was not those negative events some people go through when they start to wake up. I think I woke up a long time ago as I was going through some major negative events in my life (as all of you were/are). I always knew we are more than our body but going through those events I finally became aware of who I truly am. I think that this negativity I'm feeling now isn't the same negativity I was feeling back then. The level two, dim was talking about, was for sure a phase I went through a few years ago when I was starting to become aware.

At the moment I'm in a phase where I surpassed categorizing myself by any kind of spiritual levels because I can see myself as a soul and not just a human being. And because of that it's hard for me to understand what's going on. I am thankful for your words of advice :D I truly am :D but I just wanted to say that I find myself right know in some strange phase when everything is at a standstill. I mean, I 'm like in a snowball... the world is turning around but spiritually I'm in front of the wall and can't move forward...Even though I'm "awake" I don't understand why I can't help myself figuring out where this emotions are coming from and why I don't recognize them.

I'm glad I have found people who are aware of what I'm talking about

[Old Wolf]

Posted by Avi (here)
I find myself right know in some strange phase when everything is at a standstill. I mean, I 'm like in a snowball... the world is turning around but spiritually I'm in front of the wall and can't move forward...Even though I'm "awake" I don't understand why I can't help myself figuring out where this emotions are coming from and why I don't recognize them.

Very well said. I think I'm at the same stage .. I'm trying to work on myself but nothing I'm doing seems to lead to a path forward. Each day it's apparently getting a little more difficult to make progress, my intuitive abilities are harder to exercise and day to day experiences just keep hitting me in the face. I'm searching for some way forward but there's no obvious path. It occurred to me a while back that part of the problem was that prior to 2012, the way forwards was always obvious. When I would think of something to do, I'd "just know" that it was the right thing to do. I think sub-consciously I was using my undeveloped clairvoyance to read the timeline ahead of me and act on instinct.

Now there's all of this .. stuff to deal with. Not only are my intuitive abilities not really helping me to deal with it but they're also new things to deal with. I never dealt with my emotions before and now I'm dealing with my own emotions, other people's emotions, emotional baggage from past lives and inherited genetic emotional baggage. It's like a maelstrom and it's extremely frustrating. It's hard to stay calm and patient enough to see the forest for the trees and my progress feels extremely slow.

[Avi]

Posted by Old Wolf (here)

Posted by Avi (here)
I find myself right know in some strange phase when everything is at a standstill. I mean, I 'm like in a snowball... the world is turning around but spiritually I'm in front of the wall and can't move forward...Even though I'm "awake" I don't understand why I can't help myself figuring out where this emotions are coming from and why I don't recognize them.

Very well said. I think I'm at the same stage .. I'm trying to work on myself but nothing I'm doing seems to lead to a path forward. Each day it's apparently getting a little more difficult to make progress, my intuitive abilities are harder to exercise and day to day experiences just keep hitting me in the face. I'm searching for some way forward but there's no obvious path. It occurred to me a while back that part of the problem was that prior to 2012, the way forwards was always obvious. When I would think of something to do, I'd "just know" that it was the right thing to do. I think sub-consciously I was using my undeveloped clairvoyance to read the timeline ahead of me and act on instinct.

Now there's all of this .. stuff to deal with. Not only are my intuitive abilities not really helping me to deal with it but they're also new things to deal with. I never dealt with my emotions before and now I'm dealing with my own emotions, other people's emotions, emotional baggage from past lives and inherited genetic emotional baggage. It's like a maelstrom and it's extremely frustrating. It's hard to stay calm and patient enough to see the forest for the trees and my progress feels extremely slow.

You said exactly the same thing I have been feeling lately... And that stuff with other people's emotions.... Sometimes I wake up in the morning and feel angry or sad for example without no reason and I feel like that the whole day or one part of a day and then that anger disappear all of a sudden. Those emotions are not mine but from the people that are close to me or complete strangers... My intuitive abilities are sleeping or maybe I don't have them anymore..I'm kidding.. I still have them but I can't use them.... There are times when I think that I can't handle it no more, that my head is going to explode...but then there is this little voice inside of me telling me that everything is going to be all right....I still have hope but I lose it from time to time.

I'm sending you a big

[Old Wolf]

Posted by Avi (here)
I'm sending you a big

I feel you. I don't have the answers but it really, really helps to know that I'm not alone.

Thankyou Avi.

[quiltinggrandma]

if we could all stay in a state of expansion all the time,,,we wouldn't be here

[TheInBetween]

I've considered myself "very awake" for the past year or a bit more, but I've been informed for at least 3 years. I've been a chronic cannabis user almost since the beginning I woke up. Waking up to this harsh reality and using cannabis as my "protector" has led me to very bad anxiety, depression, and addiction (yes you can be mentally addicted to weed). The past few months I have felt like complete ****, but I have gained lots of spiritual insight. I believe in not only the effects of EMF radiation and chemtrails but most specifically their uses and why I think these were designed to reinforce mind control but most importantly to target awakened people who have broke free from the matrix. An efficient censoring method isn't to kill somebody or tell them to shut up, it's to overwhelm them with misinformation and unconnected dots, but with directed thinking/emotion/and actions through EMF radiation on top of that. I really think that EMF radiation has the power to "calcify" or at least harm our pineal glands. We are vibrational beings, and we are being hit 24/7 with what we're supposed to believe as "non-ionized" radiation, and it's supposedly not harmful because it's not ionized. I am a very intuitive and creative person, and I have many plans for my life. I have seen the bigger picture in many subjects that other conspiracy people haven't, and this is why I think I'm a target. This is why I think I've been in such a "rut" for the past few months. I remember every time I got hit by EMF radiation these three things happened: (1) I first noticed the shift in frequency which was very noticeable and obviously different kinds of frequencies were being beamed at me, (2) I felt pressure, or almost a small squeezing in the middle of my head which I knew was my pineal gland, and (3) I would prepare myself and try to make myself remember that this will be the result of my lack of spiritual insight, and surely enough, I haven't been gaining any kind of conscious benefits from spirituality within the past few months. And no I don't think eating organic and meditating is going to solve this...This is likely the whole reason EMF radiation and chemtrails exist, to make sure our spiritual and natural lifestyle is still effected. The ****ing indigenous tribes are still effected by this and they don't even know!

Posted by Marikins (here)
I have total faith that all will be well. This chaos is just a great natural cycle and is actually a very powerful time of creativity. From this great swirling mess of possibilities, you can grab whatever you want. You want good things for everyone, and you will be creating that, maybe not as fast as we would like. And the not fitting in thing is because we are still effected by those in power and since they are nervous they are acting out more. I think things will settle out and you will naturally find where you fit in better. I hope soon for you and for me!

Posted by Sérénité (here)
I'm a big believer in thinking positive, the law's of attraction, treating others how I would like to be treated etc...
But despite this I seem to be getting hit with nothing but knives in the back, adversity at every turn and general negativity all around me.

I believe in balance, but (1) I don't believe we are in control of the balance whatsoever and rather we are playing roles in a balanced system that was designed for the string pullers to always take advantage of and always create revolutions in ways they desire, it works like problem, reaction and then solution. I think "indigos" or "old souls" are good examples of this balance. But it doesn't mean we were all sent from some god-like being or civilization from another planet, but more like we are required for this balance to work. I think people picture a balance and imagine that everyone just has money and that's the system we strive towards, a world without poverty and war, but is it possible? How do we know if it's possible? We don't. We do know that native americans and other societies lived in a peaceful and harmonic civilization. But was it la-la land with nothing but ponies, rainbows, butterflies, and collaboration? I don't think so, there must have been a balance. All civilizations have their own dilemmas, and I think the elite in the world today are very aware of this. That no matter how hard we strive towards creating a utopian world, there will always be problems. This might be why they want a "perpetual balance with nature" at a 500 million population. An easier to control balance, plus more consciousness put into the people.

I don't really believe in the law of attraction, but rather I believe in the lifestyle. Thinking positively raises your vibration and gives you good energy, kind of like a person who's sad can trick themselves into being happy by smiling even if they don't want to be. We are just like flesh vehicles, run by chemicals, we are unconscious how everyday activities like thinking, walking, talking, and feeling can change our circumstances. We have to be willing to go through the long and hard process of creating our own reality in order for it to come true. Many people are under the wrong impression that the law of attraction is just a thing where we put something into our minds and then we will just get it like magic, mostly people who don't believe in it. Then people who do believe it just say it's a long process, and I agree. I don't think it's anything special, I think it's the law of the universe, work hard on yourself and your goals on a daily basis and eventually you'll achieve what you want.

I don't think life is supposed to be perfect. I don't think that being positive is just going to one day make everyone wake up and yearn to change the world and be a good person. I think love, positive thinking, and unity is required for individuals, groups, and civilizations to thrive. But is the use of this single energy going to be the exact and only method required to change the world? Not at all, that's ridiculous.

[Aurvandil]

Hmm, yes, that is exactly what I felt when I wrote earlier on this thread but then removed my long text.

I don´t think progress is linear but goes back or forward, slower or faster over time. BUT - these days it seems that the way to go forward, at least in my life, is somehow totally blocked.

Before 2012, yes, there was only the feeling of hard work but I knew I´d get somewhere further on the path. Now - just a void, no crossing over, no light on the other side what so ever. I have talked to others who say the same.

And I am picking up a lot of strange things and negativity around, it is also hitting me in the face, like it is piling on top of me to hold me back/down. People are sometimes behaving like they suddenly have become crazy.

Why? Is it a test for us to hold on, for patience, strength? Or what?

Posted by Old Wolf (here)

Posted by Avi (here)
I find myself right know in some strange phase when everything is at a standstill. I mean, I 'm like in a snowball... the world is turning around but spiritually I'm in front of the wall and can't move forward...Even though I'm "awake" I don't understand why I can't help myself figuring out where this emotions are coming from and why I don't recognize them.

Very well said. I think I'm at the same stage .. I'm trying to work on myself but nothing I'm doing seems to lead to a path forward. Each day it's apparently getting a little more difficult to make progress, my intuitive abilities are harder to exercise and day to day experiences just keep hitting me in the face. I'm searching for some way forward but there's no obvious path. It occurred to me a while back that part of the problem was that prior to 2012, the way forwards was always obvious. When I would think of something to do, I'd "just know" that it was the right thing to do. I think sub-consciously I was using my undeveloped clairvoyance to read the timeline ahead of me and act on instinct.

Now there's all of this .. stuff to deal with. Not only are my intuitive abilities not really helping me to deal with it but they're also new things to deal with. I never dealt with my emotions before and now I'm dealing with my own emotions, other people's emotions, emotional baggage from past lives and inherited genetic emotional baggage. It's like a maelstrom and it's extremely frustrating. It's hard to stay calm and patient enough to see the forest for the trees and my progress feels extremely slow.

[Avi]

Posted by Aurvandil (here)
Hmm, yes, that is exactly what I felt when I wrote earlier on this thread but then removed my long text.

I don´t think progress is linear but goes back or forward, slower or faster over time. BUT - these days it seems that the way to go forward, at least in my life, is somehow totally blocked.

Before 2012, yes, there was only the feeling of hard work but I knew I´d get somewhere further on the path. Now - just a void, no crossing over, no light on the other side what so ever. I have talked to others who say the same.

And I am picking up a lot of strange things and negativity around, it is also hitting me in the face, like it is piling on top of me to hold me back/down. People are sometimes behaving like they suddenly have become crazy.

Why? Is it a test for us to hold on, for patience, strength? Or what?

I've been asking myself the same questions over and over again and still have no answer to them. Maybe we just have to be... just live our lives and radiate our energy to the people around us Maybe that's our mission..to filter this negative emotions into positive ones and that way we help ourselves and the world around us

[Aurvandil]

Yes, I agree, That is the only thing we can do, but in these times it demands more strength/energy than before. That also means that we have to have somewhere to rest to gain both the strength and energy.
I think I´ll wear my crystal to protect me from at least a small part of this strange negativity. Perhaps also practice shielding if needed.
Take care!

Posted by Avi (here)

Posted by Aurvandil (here)
Hmm, yes, that is exactly what I felt when I wrote earlier on this thread but then removed my long text.

I don´t think progress is linear but goes back or forward, slower or faster over time. BUT - these days it seems that the way to go forward, at least in my life, is somehow totally blocked.

Before 2012, yes, there was only the feeling of hard work but I knew I´d get somewhere further on the path. Now - just a void, no crossing over, no light on the other side what so ever. I have talked to others who say the same.

And I am picking up a lot of strange things and negativity around, it is also hitting me in the face, like it is piling on top of me to hold me back/down. People are sometimes behaving like they suddenly have become crazy.

Why? Is it a test for us to hold on, for patience, strength? Or what?

I've been asking myself the same questions over and over again and still have no answer to them. Maybe we just have to be... just live our lives and radiate our energy to the people around us Maybe that's our mission..to filter this negative emotions into positive ones and that way we help ourselves and the world around us

[Avi]

Posted by Aurvandil (here)
Yes, I agree, That is the only thing we can do, but in these times it demands more strength/energy than before. That also means that we have to have somewhere to rest to gain both the strength and energy.
I think I´ll wear my crystal to protect me from at least a small part of this strange negativity. Perhaps also practice shielding if needed.
Take care! ]

for you

[Constance]

Posted by Avi (here)
Wow I didn't expect so much feedback :D


I was a little afraid people wouldn't understand what I wanted to say but now I'm positively surprised. You are all great and I'm feeling your positive energy right know
Yes, it's flowing :D

Nobody said it would be easy on this road we choose to take I'm aware of that and maybe this strange feelings from time to time is just another rock we have to climb or move to reach the final destination. If everything would go easy, maybe we would be bored

Many, many thanks to all of you, you are great and I'm happy knowing there are more people like me, maybe I found my soul group :D

I'm sending much love to you all

Hi Avi,

Much love to you and big earth hugs

I ditto everyone's comments regarding hanging in there.

That tiny little voice we call our intuition, is always whispering in our ear and is actually our future self.

Our future self is always beckoning us on.

Our future selves can guide us in the most amazing ways possible.
Having the intention of staying open to our future self, allows us to receive all that is coming our way.

It is highly likely why you started this thread.

If you can nurture your inner silence as much as possible, get as much sunlight as you can, sungaze, moonbathe, eat the most highest and purest foods you can get, it will all help.

Stay in gratitude for what you have and what is coming your way and it will fuel your intuition.

[Constance]

To all that are really feeling it at the moment, I am tuning into your energies and doing ho'oponopono for you all. I love you all.

[Avi]

I was writing about some strange and negative feelings I have had two weeks ago and I think they were at their highest point back then. I still don't know why is this happening, where this feelings come from but I'm glad they're gone know. Finally I know that's the way it goes. There are times in life when everything piles up, every bit of negative energy from different sources is flowing through you. Maybe because it's time to close some doors or remove some people from our life or to get courage to do something we were afraid to do for a very long time... For past two weeks everything is starting to change in my life. Maybe some new beginning waiting for me. I began to feel my inner strength,, found feathers and coins in front of me, get synchronized ( 11:11 and all other combinations on computer screen or mobile) etc... It was very hard for me but I'm filled with energy right now I don't know is it because of you and your loving energy or something else but I'm thankful for your posts and advices

And now I'm sending to all of you my loving energy and much hugs to everyone