I Am The TRUE Satan - Any Questions?

[Mike]

I hadn't planned on revealing my true identity ..but that cretinous, sorry excuse for a nemesis has stubbornly set up camp in my jurisdiction, despite all my territorial piss squirts and scat piles. There goes the bloody neighborhood (no pun intended...I haven't killed anyone in a while, actually).

The truth is, I smelt him coming from a galaxy away. It was like getting olfactorily b!tch-slapped. He came riding a glowing wave of white light, with leonine locks of glistening hair swept off his tan forehead..reeking of fresh linens and fabric softener and wood shavings. He arrived on earth a bit too dramatically for my tastes...sort of like a gymnast who has nailed a complicated landing. He offered a smug, sanctimonious grin to men and beast alike, shamelessly inviting our adoration. Wasn't that wonderful, he seemed to say? Aren't *I* wonderful?

Salvation? Pah! The man couldn't even control his own bladder! The serpents were the first to notice a curious dark stain on the groin area of his robe..and after announcing it to the mammals, word got back to Christ and he condemned those slithery little gossipers to what your legends call a "garden" but was really just a compost pile filled with rotting veggies and semen-stained leaves from the naked homeless couple that were living there at the time. They'd recently been booted from their cave for failing to pay the rent. The man looked especially desperate so I offered him an apple for his soul, and the idiot agreed. I have it trapped in a glass cage near my 9th chakra.. and his sad, pitiful, astral face remains perpetually smashed against it, watching it horror as I tempt his dumb wife, night after night. Your history has got it all backwards.

I AM the true Satan. Oh, do I seem too frivolous for you? Too Silly? Eternity will do that to you! When faced with timelessness, there is really nothing left to do but f#ck with you idiots. Stop trying to find deep meanings in all of it!!! No, you weren't "chosen", ok?...in the spirit of collegiality I'll confess to being behind that grey-alien meme. And they're not "aliens" anyway...they're merely petulant children gone rogue. Sure, I spawned them, but here's the kicker - they're half-human..all thanks to that horny adulteress at the compost pile. That's why women will eternally suffer menstrual cycles by the way. That's one thing your traditional Christians got right - it's a punishment...never mind the expedient fellow who lobotomized his soul for the apple and lost his ability to protect her properly. See, justice was never God's strong suit. The first few pages of genesis testify to that. And he passed his hypocriticism onto Junior...his recent thread provides the evidence!

At least I got kicked out of heaven for attempting something ambitious! Junior was basically kicked out for not taking out the trash and neglecting to make his bed. He spun the whole "savior" story out of embarrassment.. it's high level of grandiosity only betrays his level of shame and humiliation.

Think I'm lying? Making this all up? Ridicule me, I dare you. At best you'll have a dream of a guttoral, backwards-sounding-record-voice repeating disturbing mantras to highjack your soul frequency. At worst, I'll manifest as a hag in a striped sweater, sucking your spirit essence out thru your luminous egg whilst smiling at you creepily throughout your entire 5 hour sleep paralysis. I have pretty bad breath too, by the way.

I hate you all, but I am available for questions...mostly because I hate christ more and want to steal a bit of his thunder. Dad's been neglecting him for a while now, and with his birthday coming up, the absence of paternal attention is making him nostalgic and mawkish. Don't feel bad for him though, it's all ego. It's all ego for me too, but i readily confess it..and there's something to be said for that.

Ah, this is liberating! I was sick of pretending to be that Mike fellow, funny and brilliant as he was.

So go on, ask away. Don't be shy. I am Satan and I am at your service, but not for long! I can only hold form here for a short period of time..at which point Mike will take over and recall none of this..he therefore cannot be responsible for anything said from this point on.....

[Mike]

I'm getting a telepathic question from....a Larry is it? Larry, speak up. Raise your volume and speak into my good ear. I'm almost 15 billion years old for crying out loud.

Telepathy is tricky for me. Earth-bound folks all sound like 6 year olds on helium. It's disorienting for my vehicle.

Loki and Enki? No I'm neither and that's a horrible question. Loki is now an ambiguous entity who hosts a soft-spoken 6th dimensional radio program on trans issues. Enki has split his rather enormous soul and has incarnated on earth as every pizza guy and gas station attendant that has ever called you "boss" or "chief" in your life. He did this because while in spirit form he wanted to know what it would be like to be an enormous c#nt.

...Next

[lake]

Hi Santa....did Lilith really beget all of your demons after being scorned by that "Dad she isn't pretty enough for me, I want a new girlfriend" boy Adam? (who I guess must be on your naughty list)

[Gemma13]

:rofl: Damn, you're good! :ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:

Loved reading this. Will get the :pop2: if the resident alter decides to pop in for a chat.

[Valerie Villars]

Dear Satan,

What is it that you want for Christmas besides homeless pussy and wayward souls?

Sincerely,

Just Wondering

[Valerie Villars]

Is it true if you helped Led Zeppelin record their albums? Which one is your favorite?

[seehas]

Dear Satan Claus,

do you receive presents yourself or you just give them to others?

:sun::heart:

[ichingcarpenter]

I especially enjoyed your minions GHW Bush and Dick Cheney and their contributions to war, chaos and pestilence on this planet.
How is George doing? Is he warm enough? How soon will Dick join him?
Oh, btw, do you do weddings as well? Like I told JC in the last thread my daughter is getting married and I'm on a pension so times are tough we need some wine, more bread and fish for the wedding party.

[shaberon]

Hey man, I think I remember you. I'm called Astaroth. I'm one of those djinn that King Solomon bottled up in a lake for a while. That gave me time to think about times when I was a woman called Astarte. You know, we're just elementals, we don't have real eggs and semen, but we can change shape and collect them from people. Then we can reproduce and enter their nightmares, but I don't like to do that, because people are really stupid.

But since I can do that, and they really like it, it was easy to get them to remember me forever as Easter! I have legions I can pass the task of the actual dirty work to. Mostly I just sit around and snort about, well, how easy it is. The only real fun I have with humans is when I can get a pope or a bishop to spill their own blood in attempts to talk to me. It's funny, because all you need is the right magic wand and then I have no choice but to do whatever you say. If not, then the roles are reversed. Back in the day, we had a whole temple system where they knew how to make me co-operate and we ran it as a franchise specializing in sacred sex, because it was an antidote for war. But a bunch of those guys who thought they knew better shut it down. I guess there have been a lot of wars since then; I'm not involved with it, but I have the geomatriac numbers of at least a dozen brothers who love it, so, if you need someone, just let me know.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi, this ain't my time of year. I still spend a lot of time in bottles, just because it's out of the way. I'm kind of old school, seven billion souls is too many for me to bother tempting. I like to come out for the springtime frolics in Arcadia with the fauns and nymphs and all the cool people from the paintings. That, and a little bit of Halloween is usually enough for me. People think I'm really powerful and try to get me all the time and it just makes a bunch of noise. Trust me, if you're not someone I can use to put one of your churches in a compromising position, there's no reason I would care about you. Most of you are destined for annihilation anyway, so you might as well give up.

[ThePythonicCow]

Does the Catholic Pope report to you, through your minions the Rothschild's and Rockefeller's?
CMNo6JPLH5U

[Mike]

To all those who "thanked" me, Satan likes this. It makes his ego glow a beautiful magetna. I'd pat you all on your silly human skulls with my hoofs if I could. To all the rest who have witnessed my efforts and declined to express appreciation, you do so at your own peril. And I know who you are. All of you.

After almost a decade of ingesting no caffeine at all, I influenced my vehicle to slug a huge cup of Dr. Pepper last night. This left him wide-eyed and sleepless, staring at the ceiling till 4 am whilst making sweat angels in his sheets (oh the irony!) Watching him stare catatonically at the ceiling with each resounding thud of his heart was practically orgasmic. It sure beats possessing a herd of cows and plunging off a cliff anyway. Or was it sheep? My memory is a bit foggy. That half-wit christ would know.

My vehicle will find himself a bit busy today, but rest assured will answer each and every of your pathetic questions when he's done with his daily rituals. Read your necronomicon and stay patient.

[The Moss Trooper]

That altar to Saturn now makes complete sense!

SATURN = SATAN

You are that guy Mike?

;)

[lake]

May I demand of you a couple of further answers to questions?

When will Hell freeze over once again?
I mean it seems to do so rather regularly and as you did attempt to tempt the last Christ by offering your lands....will you proffer this to the new incarnation of same?

Also....Was Bill Hicks correct with his description of your....well your....ermm your....appendage?
And do all those working in advertising and marketing HAVE to do THAT???

[Deux Corbeaux]

...............
Oh, btw, do you do weddings as well? Like I told JC in the last thread my daughter is getting married and I'm on a pension so times are tough we need some wine, more bread and fish for the wedding party.

Do you hate your future son in law that much ? ;)

[we-R-one]

Wow, just wow…I’m appalled by this thread. How passive aggressive can you get? I perceive it to be the perfect example of cyber-bullying at its finest and by a moderator to boot, how telling! I sure hope the person you’re making fun of is stable enough to endure the backlash of your writings. I’d hate to see his family file a lawsuit upon the suicide of their loved one only to discover his last postings lead to all places, Avalon. I see a spiritual IQ of about 0 going on right now. Why would anyone want to share their story on this platform, E.V.E.R.???

The teachings of Jesus encompassed love, compassion and forgiveness. In today’s times, the message couldn’t be more relevant, but sadly seems lost and forgotten to the oh so ‘enlightened ones’ on the pages of Avalon. I am seriously embarrassed for this forum right now…..dear viewers some of us Avalon members are not o.k. with public shaming, which strongly suggests 'cult' like behaviors.

PS This thread pertains to a thread in the Member Only section.


Cyberbullying – A Deadly Epidemic
“United States Department Education Secretary Arne Duncan is calling bullying a “silent epidemic” and that bullying involving race, religion or sexual orientation may be a federal offense. This issue has become global and as cyberbullying gains more media attention, lawsuits are increasing. Headlines such as “Families seeking $35 million in bullying lawsuits” and “Court awards bullied student $800,000” have become common weekly news. Another widely publicized lawsuit was a boy who sued the fathers of three former classmates for $350,000 after they obtained a copy of a video the boy made for a class project and posted it on the internet. The video depicted the boy using a golf club as a light saber; he was dubbed the “Starwars Kid” and received world-wide ridicule. The suit settled out of court.”

Source: https://imanetwork.org/advocacy/internet-safety/cyberbullying-a-deadly-epidemic/

[Mike]

Dear Satan,

What is it that you want for Christmas besides homeless pussy and wayward souls?

Sincerely,

Just Wondering



Why, are you homeless? (Pls contact me via pm)

Led Zepplin are clear genius. I wrote the lyrics and music for 'When The Levee Breaks', amongst others. That's me on mouth organ btw. When I listen to that song I imagine myself a 500 foot goliath, taking hot steamy pee's on crowds of people and things as a symbolic means of declaring ownership over them. And then i go do it.

I could go on and on, but all these misadventures have been written about in a new book being published over at Richard Dolan Press. But he's got all the adverts hidden behind a f#cking paywall. Even to a guy like me, that's cold. He's changed

[Mike]

Wow, just wow…I’m appalled by this thread. How passive aggressive can you get? I perceive it to be the perfect example of cyber-bullying at its finest and by a moderator to boot, how telling! I sure hope the person you’re making fun of is stable enough to endure the backlash of your writings. I’d hate to see his family file a lawsuit upon the suicide of their loved one only to discover his last postings lead to all places, Avalon. I see a spiritual IQ of about 0 going on right now. Why would anyone want to share their story on this platform, E.V.E.R.???

The teachings of Jesus encompassed love, compassion and forgiveness. In today’s times, the message couldn’t be more relevant, but sadly seems lost and forgotten to the oh so ‘enlightened ones’ on the pages of Avalon. I am seriously embarrassed for this forum right now…..dear viewers some of us Avalon members are not o.k. with public shaming, which strongly suggests 'cult' like behaviors.


Cyberbullying – A Deadly Epidemic
“United States Department Education Secretary Arne Duncan is calling bullying a “silent epidemic” and that bullying involving race, religion or sexual orientation may be a federal offense. This issue has become global and as cyberbullying gains more media attention, lawsuits are increasing. Headlines such as “Families seeking $35 million in bullying lawsuits” and “Court awards bullied student $800,000” have become common weekly news. Another widely publicized lawsuit was a boy who sued the fathers of three former classmates for $350,000 after they obtained a copy of a video the boy made for a class project and posted it on the internet. The video depicted the boy using a golf club as a light saber; he was dubbed the “Starwars Kid” and received world-wide ridicule. The suit settled out of court.”

Source: https://imanetwork.org/advocacy/internet-safety/cyberbullying-a-deadly-epidemic/


Passive aggressive? And here i thought I was just being aggressive.

For all you know, I'm hardly stable enough to withstand the bashing of *his* writings. What about me? Your post feels slightly discriminating.

I think I knew you in a past life. We got along back then. Just give me time

[we-R-one]

Wow, just wow…I’m appalled by this thread. How passive aggressive can you get? I perceive it to be the perfect example of cyber-bullying at its finest and by a moderator to boot, how telling! I sure hope the person you’re making fun of is stable enough to endure the backlash of your writings. I’d hate to see his family file a lawsuit upon the suicide of their loved one only to discover his last postings lead to all places, Avalon. I see a spiritual IQ of about 0 going on right now. Why would anyone want to share their story on this platform, E.V.E.R.???

The teachings of Jesus encompassed love, compassion and forgiveness. In today’s times, the message couldn’t be more relevant, but sadly seems lost and forgotten to the oh so ‘enlightened ones’ on the pages of Avalon. I am seriously embarrassed for this forum right now…..dear viewers some of us Avalon members are not o.k. with public shaming, which strongly suggests 'cult' like behaviors.


Cyberbullying – A Deadly Epidemic
“United States Department Education Secretary Arne Duncan is calling bullying a “silent epidemic” and that bullying involving race, religion or sexual orientation may be a federal offense. This issue has become global and as cyberbullying gains more media attention, lawsuits are increasing. Headlines such as “Families seeking $35 million in bullying lawsuits” and “Court awards bullied student $800,000” have become common weekly news. Another widely publicized lawsuit was a boy who sued the fathers of three former classmates for $350,000 after they obtained a copy of a video the boy made for a class project and posted it on the internet. The video depicted the boy using a golf club as a light saber; he was dubbed the “Starwars Kid” and received world-wide ridicule. The suit settled out of court.”

Source: https://imanetwork.org/advocacy/internet-safety/cyberbullying-a-deadly-epidemic/


Passive aggressive? And here i thought I was just being aggressive.

For all you know, I'm hardly stable enough to withstand the bashing of *his* writings. What about me? Your post feels slightly discriminating.

I think I knew you in a past life. We got along back then. Just give me time

Please step down as a moderator, there's nothing funny about what you're doing.

[Mike]

May I demand of you a couple of further answers to questions?

When will Hell freeze over once again?
I mean it seems to do so rather regularly and as you did attempt to tempt the last Christ by offering your lands....will you proffer this to the new incarnation of same?

Also....Was Bill Hicks correct with his description of your....well your....ermm your....appendage?
And do all those working in advertising and marketing HAVE to do THAT???



My appendage? You mean my horns? My tail? Oh...wait...

Well it's not that type of forum, my friend. Hicks...hes a sick voyeur type, always watching me with my homeless friends. I found it disturbing.

Sigh...hell will never freeze over. And I resent that pointless little phrase. You never hear people say heaven will burn down, do you? Just lousy metaphors for the respective states of vibration. Some lazy idiot invented that phrase quite a while ago... it spread amongst his subnormal friends, and he mistakenly thought himself funny. As his respect grew, so did his influence.....and I've had to answer that ridiculous question ever since.

This new christ hardly requires such manipulation. How will I tempt him? I'll tempt him with Swedish fish.

[lake]

Thanks Santa for that answer....really cleared up no end of nothing for me....

Do you consider the self righteous who sit on their high horses and preach to others to be of your clan? Or do you consider that they are just silly billies?

Also....are ambulance chasers who wish to gain financially from political correctness when they have actually sustained zero harm (it just being life) also some of yours?

Lastly (for this post) ....Do you think that the old Christ was actually on your side? I mean....so many millions have died because of His religion over 2000 years, its actually rather hard to count!

[Flash]

ROLF

Mike -sorry, edit:Satan -, oh note to myself: never be sorry with Satan , he is a professional guilt tripper - I now believe that you made an altar to Saturn, once in this life.

Since we have to stand the I AM JESUS CHRIST thread, I presume we will have to stand yours for a counter balance.

I must sadly add that your prose is better and more filled with imagination than Jesus one. Sadly 😂

[Flash]

We are one: the baby in the other thread has obviously some psy problems. There is thousands plural Jesus and -or Christ - throughout the world. We have been good enough to let his thread go. A backlash is almost inevitable, but it is not going on our herein Jesus thread. Just a backlash. And well written. Bullying is quite different and much more direct and virulent.

I am tired with the politically correct or the offended attitude these days, shutting up any dissent of any kind. Why being so offended - Mike is just expressing with an incredible prose how fed up many of us are with delusion on one hand (schizophrenic, or any other kind of delusion). And how fed up we are about shutting up in case someone get offended.

How long are we to stand for all this crap?

[lake]

Is it true that you are real pretty? Like a beautiful dawn?


In Ezekiel 28:12-19 we have a true picture of Satan. “You were the seal of perfection, Full of wisdom and perfect in beauty . . . You were the anointed cherub who covers; I established you . . . you were perfect in your ways from the day you were created.”

It's stated there that you are an anointed cherub!
Isn't that just the little flying naked babies things, with bow and arrows??

Or are you just an arse?

Do you actually 'own' this world?


Jesus calls Satan, “the ruler of this world.” John 12:31. The Apostle Paul calls him “the god of this age.” 2 Corinthians 4:4.

Or is it just a rental?

[Mike]

Oh, Avalonians...ponder this while you're contemplating your navels later....

I made David think he was Christ. Kapow! Blap! Pow!

Satan:1. Christ:0

Anyone notice the forum moving slowly? That's me of course, getting my petty rocks off. I'd been holding doors for the elderly while they were a good 30 feet away, forcing them into a half jog to fulfill that silly silent agreement you humans have regarding politeness. But it got old...so I messed with the forum instead.

I can do other tricks too. But you must ask. It's all part of satanic doctrine.

[DNA]

Mike I would never have the balls in a million years to write a thread like this.
I commend you for your talent, and I even enjoy your sadistic attempt to f-ck with folks but over all it's a slippery slope you maneuver.
As a young lad fresh from reading the Nag Hummadi library I felt quite sure that Christianity had it all wrong.
It was at this time I felt the Gnostic snake in the garden of Eden was in fact the good guy, as such I don't know why but I immersed myself in meditating on this and writing poetry explaining Satan as the emancipating vessel providing freedom from the mental programming of society and leading one to true autonomy. I was amazed at how good the poetry was and during the midst of this I had hung out with Rob Halfed of Judas Priest fame. I was going to hand over my poetry except he kept trying to hit on me as such I kind of just tried to escape with my virgin but in tact. My point is, that you are a talented writer and most talented writers are also good channelers in my opinion. I'm not any where near the caliber writer you are but in the midst of my writing I felt a powerful presence in the room with me one night. I was convinced this entity was being summoned by my writing and my willingness to engage this archetype as such. As for myself I realized there must be an error in my understandings and I ceased and halted all of my work in this direction.
I understand what you are doing is an exercise in folks becoming detached from certain hang ups but being the talented writer you are i would just like to offer a cautionary tale. And if nothing else in my story frightens you then beware of Rob Halfred coming for your virgin butthole, because apparently calling on such forces causes one to run that risk.

[Valerie Villars]

Satan, perhaps wrongly, I never took your thread as a direct insult to anyone and it actually made me see what a great sense of humor you have. You were able to take a Dr. Pepper fueled idea and whip up all kinds of fun, satire and movement on an otherwise slow forum.

You might want to check with Roseanne Barr who had a whole backlash of stupidity over an ambien and beer fueled "It seemed like a good idea at the time" idea. She may have some insight for you on how people take things the wrong way.

[Mike]

Hi Santa....did Lilith really beget all of your demons after being scorned by that "Dad she isn't pretty enough for me, I want a new girlfriend" boy Adam? (who I guess must be on your naughty list)


What's this Santa thing all about? Perhaps you're on the wrong forum.

I don't beget things, first off. That's antiquated language. Pull yourself together man.

Why would I send my demons to attack a fellow demon? Re-read the Epic Of Gilgamesh.

Satan has spoken.

[Mike]

:rofl: Damn, you're good! :ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:

Loved reading this. Will get the :pop2: if the resident alter decides to pop in for a chat.


Yes, i know I'm good. And thank you.

What I'd really like to do, more than anything else, is "thank" myself? Is that possible here?

Like you, I'm awaiting the resident alter. Just tapping my hoofs on this coffee table, waiting...

I'm not going anywhere. Look, I can do this for eternity.

[A Voice from the Mountains]

I perceive it to be the perfect example of cyber-bullying

Looks like classic satire to me.

I think the increasing amount of emotional outrage over criticism, in whatever form, is a very dangerous thing. It's like the resurgence of the Red Guard, or the thought police. Maybe people need to face real hardship more often in life in order to better put things in perspective.

Trust me, any of you guys could cuss me until you are all blue in the face, and it wouldn't bother me in the least. Do you think something is wrong with me?

[Mike]

Dear Satan Claus,

do you receive presents yourself or you just give them to others?

:sun::heart:




Satan Clause. Yes, I see what you did there.
...
...
...
Who is that grimacing, constipated fellow acting as your avatar? Burnt orange looks good on nobody, and he's no exception.

Please rephrase your question. I'm an evil genius, and I don't speak pedestrian.

[Mike]

I perceive it to be the perfect example of cyber-bullying

Looks like classic satire to me.

I think the increasing amount of emotional outrage over criticism, in whatever form, is a very dangerous thing. It's like the resurgence of the Red Guard, or the thought police. Maybe people need to face real hardship more often in life in order to better put things in perspective.

Trust me, any of you guys could cuss me until you are all blue in the face, and it wouldn't bother me in the least. Do you think something is wrong with me?



I like you. I always have. By the sword of Jahbulon, i hereby knight thee ....well I can't think of anything appropriate atm. I'll feel better after I eat a few children, and then we'll revisit this.

[A Voice from the Mountains]

I like you. I always have.

It's because I listen to you, isn't it? :P


"The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge." - Carl Jung

"...the shadow belongs to the wholeness of the personality." - Carl Jung

In Christianity, Satan (which means 'adversary') or The Devil, we are told, is at work in the world. But most do not know who, what or where the enemy is. But Jung knew:

"...the 'adversary' is none other than ‘the other in me.'" - Carl Jung

http://www.angelsghosts.com/carl-jung-on-demons

[Mike]

Mike I would never have the balls in a million years to write a thread like this.
I commend you for your talent, and I even enjoy your sadistic attempt to f-ck with folks but over all it's a slippery slope you maneuver.
As a young lad fresh from reading the Nag Hummadi library I felt quite sure that Christianity had it all wrong.
It was at this time I felt the Gnostic snake in the garden of Eden was in fact the good guy, as such I don't know why but I immersed myself in meditating on this and writing poetry explaining Satan as the emancipating vessel providing freedom from the mental programming of society and leading one to true autonomy. I was amazed at how good the poetry was and during the midst of this I had hung out with Rob Halfed of Judas Priest fame. I was going to hand over my poetry except he kept trying to hit on me as such I kind of just tried to escape with my virgin but in tact. My point is, that you are a talented writer and most talented writers are also good channelers in my opinion. I'm not any where near the caliber writer you are but in the midst of my writing I felt a powerful presence in the room with me one night. I was convinced this entity was being summoned by my writing and my willingness to engage this archetype as such. As for myself I realized there must be an error in my understandings and I ceased and halted all of my work in this direction.
I understand what you are doing is an exercise in folks becoming detached from certain hang ups but being the talented writer you are i would just like to offer a cautionary tale. And if nothing else in my story frightens you then beware of Rob Halfred coming for your virgin butthole, because apparently calling on such forces causes one to run that risk.



What makes you think his butthole is virginal? It's been penetrated by at least a half dozen rectal thermometers, and this all before the age of 10. The mouth is just as accurate...so why this silly ritual? Well i'll tell you why: it's to corrupt the youth and make them all gay.

I enjoyed your post. Mike has an affection for you too, I know this to be true. I'd like to insult you but we both fear your wrath, to be frank. Your unmatched knowledge of cryptids leaves you above reproach. Go in peace.

[Mike]

ROLF

Mike -sorry, edit:Satan -, oh note to myself: never be sorry with Satan , he is a professional guilt tripper - I now believe that you made an altar to Saturn, once in this life.

Since we have to stand the I AM JESUS CHRIST thread, I presume we will have to stand yours for a counter balance.

I must sadly add that your prose is better and more filled with imagination than Jesus one. Sadly 😂



Imagination is a natural consequence of accepting one's shadow. Junior hasn't gotten there yet.

We had a conversation about it in a desert, quite some time ago. The bible has distorted the damn thing, of course. I was actually trying to help.

There's a phrase in the bible, something like "don't cast pearls to swine", which means to not waste one's energy trying to help someone who isn't willing to listen. I was forced to give up on the guy. I wasn't trying to tempt him, i was trying to offer that arrogant fool some wisdom.

It's always prudent to assume that the person you're talking to may just know something you don't. Unless you're me, because I know everything.

[Mike]

Does the Catholic Pope report to you, through your minions the Rothschild's and Rockefeller's?
CMNo6JPLH5U



Hello there Paul, the Rockefellers and Rothchilds are mere fanboys. Posers. If I approached any one of them from behind, unannounced, and said "boo!", they'd jump through the roof.

Oh they'll have their little kumbaya events under that silly owl, but it's just pageantry. Symbols and things are highly overrated in the conspiracy community..used mainly by underlings with no power to speak of. Me, I just ...do things spontaneously as the desire arrives. The rest, these alleged chosen families.. they're schemers. Do I look like a guy with a plan? I'm like a dog chasing cars..

DgzssDOTMXs

The Pope will meet with me occasionally. It's like seeing a long absent cousin at a family event though. We try to avoid each other, because neither of us can remember the other's name. It's overly polite and unproductive. I think I'll kill him soon

[we-R-one]

We are one: the baby in the other thread has obviously some psy problems. There is thousands plural Jesus and -or Christ - throughout the world. We have been good enough to let his thread go. A backlash is almost inevitable, but it is not going on our herein Jesus thread. Just a backlash. And well written. Bullying is quite different and much more direct and virulent.

I am tired with the politically correct or the offended attitude these days, shutting up any dissent of any kind. Why being so offended - Mike is just expressing with an incredible prose how fed up many of us are with delusion on one hand (schizophrenic, or any other kind of delusion). And how fed up we are about shutting up in case someone get offended.

How long are we to stand for all this crap?

Oh dear, you are such the victim of offensive writings, so sorry to hear your sky is falling.

Hey News ‘Flash’….If you can’t see what’s wrong about the approach on this thread, it says to me your moral compass is broken. Even worse, if this person is having psychological problems and has lost his way, how is this tactic of any use?

This isn’t about differing opinions. There are ways of disagreeing with other posters, but to have a moderator post a thread like this mocking another member is far from appropriate. How would you like it if someone started a thread mocking your beliefs and inadequacies? Unbelievable how it has to be explained to people. Rather than making fun of the guy, take the high road and don’t pay attention to his thread, or is that too hard for you and yours? Ya, it’s all fun and games at someone else’s expense. What’s taking place in this thread is a form of cult behavior whether you are competent or not to realize it. The point of this thread is to belittle and humiliate another member who posted a thread called I AM The True Christ which was pushed into the members only.

“Shame is the currency of cults and their leaders. The human potential for shame, to feel not good enough, bad or unworthy, is what cult leaders exploit. These traumatizing narcissists instill shame in their followers, using belittling, intimidation and humiliation, alternating these with displays of love and acceptance, in such a way as to convince the follower that their only hope for redemption, for staying in favor and not losing favor, is submission.”

Source: https://www.openmindsfoundation.org/traumatizing-narcissists-overcoming-shame/

You all might want to brush up on ‘cult’ behavior; something tells me you are lacking in the knowledge arena and unable to identify what’s taking place right in front of your face.

CULTS 101
Characteristics Associated with Cultic Groups - Revised
Janja Lalich, Ph.D. & Michael D. Langone, Ph.D.
Source: http://www.csj.org/infoserv_cult101/checklis.htm



What this thread screams to viewers….Don’t bring your stories to Avalon as you will be ripped six ways to Sunday. How’s that work towards higher vibrational behavior? Now I've said my peace and am glad to walk away from the mockery and lynching pen.

[Bill Ryan]

Don’t bring your stories to Avalon as you will be ripped six ways to Sunday.

(A brief informational injection here. :) )

Actually, that's hardly true. All members know that. It almost never happens.

Do read this thread. It's jam-packed with extraordinary personal stories, shared very openly and in considerable detail, that there's zero reason to doubt. Do please take a look.


EXPERIENCERS: Sharing, Exploring, and Learning Together (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105066-EXPERIENCERS-Sharing-Exploring-and-Learning-Together)

Re Astar of David, he hasn't visited this thread — and is unlikely to. He very rarely visits any threads other than his own. (That may tell us something, of course.)

:focus:

[A Voice from the Mountains]

On the "Astral Pulse" forum many years ago, a similar situation developed. A guy came along claiming to channel the Pleiadians through his pendulum and telepathy. He had a long-running thread taking questions and giving answers, telling about future events and alien homeworlds. Some took him seriously, some took him curiously, others of course dismissed it.

Finally, another member made a thread, "Channeling GOD," in reaction to the original thread, mostly giving out a lot of biblical dogma and half-jokingly claiming it was "channeled" from God. The threads continued to co-exist despite one of them being purely reactionary to the other and really serving no other purpose than for someone to vent.

Being critical of either doesn't amount to bullying. To me, trying to force others to conform to some opinion, or else to keep their opinions to themselves, is closer to the mark of bullying. Censorship is a form of bullying. It's ultimately using force to regulate speech. "Might makes right." How many people remember why freedom of speech is so important?

Freedom of speech truly is terrifying to cult mentalities. In Britain you can't even criticize Islam now without being accused of "hate speech" and having a run-in with police. That is cult-like. It's the same as in Muslim majority countries, actually, where criticism of Islam is also of course prohibited. Being exposed to biting criticism or "mean words" or whatever can be a much-needed shock to the system in many cases. The Catholic Church was incredibly tyrannical with censorship, because they also couldn't take criticism. Intellectual criticism is what ultimately broke the church's grip on Europe. Would it be an improvement to go back to prohibiting all criticism of matters of faith or personal experience?

[Valerie Villars]

There is no criticism. It's just an exercise in ideas and words. That's it. The proclaimed Christ is busy figuring out what he knows. On the other thread. The other Christ is still just figuring it out. Let him fight his own battles.
'

[Flash]

We r one: the one judging everyone here is you. As for moral compass, I definitely would not want to live with yours. It seems quite suffocating and eagerly wanting to restrict others freedom while avoiding at any price critical thinking which does not entails biaised depreciating judgments of others.

As for mocking others beliefs, it is not the case here. We rather are addressing illusions.

As for others beliefs, yours are that I have no moral compass on one hand, and what a moderator should or should not do, or be.

How is that for freedom and acceptance of others with their differences and divergence? Not very strong ain’t it?

We did let Christ in his thread and did not tell him what to do and how to be.

A mirror would help you here

[Innocent Warrior]

Oh you are sooo baaad, Satan.

You can’t return souls btw, we had a deal and I want my castle.

[Delight]

Is this REALLY your twitter account?


Roses are red.
Violets are red.
Everything’s red.
You’re in hell.

7:43 AM - 12 Dec 2018 (https://twitter.com/s8n/status/1072879530505834497)

[Mike]

Oh you are sooo baaad, Satan.

You can’t return souls btw, we had a deal and I want my castle.


A deal is a deal darling. The castle is yours. I shall build one of my own across the moat, and I will look longingly upon yours from my turret, waiting patiently for you to come to your senses and become my queen regnant.

Then we will arrive at diabolical plans to take over the planet over wine and enormous chicken thighs, and when one of us offers up a particularly brilliant idea, we shall toast the moon and the stars and laugh like this:
pVY1-v97Mic

[Mike]

we-r-one, so what you seem to be stating is that anyone who comes down the pike claiming whatever outlandish nonsense they like must not only be tolerated and respected, but also allowed their rampantly arrogant platform, unsullied even by ironic commentary?

Fascinating.

I won't assume that you're willing to truly think this thru, but for the sake of argument let's just say you are. The person you're referring to is making claims that could very easily be of enormous offense to a great many people of the christian faith. i believe words like blasphemy and heresy could easily be flung around. Why, they might be shocked, disgusted, and appalled, presumably in the tart, self-righteous tones that any "virtue-signalling" big mouth adopts when they feel they've hit upon an issue with an available position from whence they may unassailably bleat.

David may be unwell in some way, but that doesn't give him carte blanche to sh!t all over the forum. He writes coherently, armored with what appears to be a more than modest intelligence. He knows what he's doing, even if he doesn't. He seems immune to logic and reason, so i've simply approached from a different angle. This is merely my style, and if such misadventures are beneath you, you may leave my cult any time you like. You won't burn in hell, like you would if you were leaving his cult...so all in all, I'd say my tactics are much more compassionate.

[Mike]

Hey man, I think I remember you. I'm called Astaroth. I'm one of those djinn that King Solomon bottled up in a lake for a while. That gave me time to think about times when I was a woman called Astarte. You know, we're just elementals, we don't have real eggs and semen, but we can change shape and collect them from people. Then we can reproduce and enter their nightmares, but I don't like to do that, because people are really stupid.

But since I can do that, and they really like it, it was easy to get them to remember me forever as Easter! I have legions I can pass the task of the actual dirty work to. Mostly I just sit around and snort about, well, how easy it is. The only real fun I have with humans is when I can get a pope or a bishop to spill their own blood in attempts to talk to me. It's funny, because all you need is the right magic wand and then I have no choice but to do whatever you say. If not, then the roles are reversed. Back in the day, we had a whole temple system where they knew how to make me co-operate and we ran it as a franchise specializing in sacred sex, because it was an antidote for war. But a bunch of those guys who thought they knew better shut it down. I guess there have been a lot of wars since then; I'm not involved with it, but I have the geomatriac numbers of at least a dozen brothers who love it, so, if you need someone, just let me know.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi, this ain't my time of year. I still spend a lot of time in bottles, just because it's out of the way. I'm kind of old school, seven billion souls is too many for me to bother tempting. I like to come out for the springtime frolics in Arcadia with the fauns and nymphs and all the cool people from the paintings. That, and a little bit of Halloween is usually enough for me. People think I'm really powerful and try to get me all the time and it just makes a bunch of noise. Trust me, if you're not someone I can use to put one of your churches in a compromising position, there's no reason I would care about you. Most of you are destined for annihilation anyway, so you might as well give up.



Shaberon, I like where your head's at.

But you use words like geomatraic...I don't know what that means and that makes me feel insecure and slightly off-balance.

Nice post, but don't sound so impressive next time. Leave that to me, okay?

People are really stupid, this is true, but they're the only entertainment I've got. I'm stuck in this time-space, like a bug in ember....so like you i foster situations that create fear and anxiety...and that's my sustenance.

Your various names sound like synthetic fabric? Why is that?

¤=[Post Update]=¤


Is this REALLY your twitter account?


Roses are red.
Violets are red.
Everything’s red.
You’re in hell.

7:43 AM - 12 Dec 2018 (https://twitter.com/s8n/status/1072879530505834497)



twitter, twatter, tweeter....i don't mess with that stupid sh!t

[Mike]

I especially enjoyed your minions GHW Bush and Dick Cheney and their contributions to war, chaos and pestilence on this planet.
How is George doing? Is he warm enough? How soon will Dick join him?
Oh, btw, do you do weddings as well? Like I told JC in the last thread my daughter is getting married and I'm on a pension so times are tough we need some wine, more bread and fish for the wedding party.



If your daughter is getting married, that means you have to pay, right?

I'm feeling something that resembles sympathy for you.

Here's something that very few people know about me: I'm a romantic and an idealist and a sucker for love. So even though the marriage is doomed to fail, it's a worthy mistake to make.

[Mike]

That altar to Saturn now makes complete sense!

SATURN = SATAN

You are that guy Mike?

;)


I am that guy. Mike isn't. Not technically anyway. But yes, I know what you mean.

Wanna hear something crazy? On my last trip to Saturn I passed this really weird space fleet of submarines (no i didn't)

[Dennis Leahy]

we-R-one (one of the best researchers on the forum) meet Mike (one of the best storytellers on the forum - and the funniest.)

Left brain, meet Right brain.

[Words of Joy]

I'm able to relate to different perspectives on the approach to the root of this topic. I agree we should try not to hurt each other. I agree that having a sense of humor to relieve pressure can be a good thing. I agree that having freedom of speech is a foundation which we should all be able to rely on. Though where lies the boundary? Would we want to allow to have a boundary? I personally would say: yes. I think boundaries could be good. If one knows up front it might be hurtful to one or more persons, is it than a good thing to move forward nonetheless? If one wasn't analyzing the impact before posting, does it make it less impacting? If someone creates a thread that offends others, though might have personal challenges, what action is then desired?

Personally I think the moderating team has a great responsibility in these matters and I've seen that at least one action has been taken and maybe more. I was pleased to see action was taken and am kind of surprised this thread is now life. Which makes me wonder whether or not this was discussed across the full width of the moderating team. And leaves imo the questions: what is the stance of the team regarding these situations and how would they like the community to handle such situations? Does the Avalon have guidelines on this?

[A Voice from the Mountains]

Would we want to allow to have a boundary? I personally would say: yes. I think boundaries could be good. If one knows up front it might be hurtful to one or more persons, is it than a good thing to move forward nonetheless?

If we aren't allowed to say things simply because they may hurt someone else's feelings, that implies that feelings and emotion are more important than honesty, logic, and reasoning. It implies that feeling good is the ultimate goal of dialogue, rather than seeking truth or any other worthwhile objective.

It also implies that we are responsible for how other people feel, no matter how unreasonable their feelings may be. I personally believe that we are each responsible for our own feelings, and no one else can truly make us feel anything. Therefore you cannot be held responsible for how you "make" me feel.

Religious debates are a classic example of this. Religious people get offended very easily. So now we can't criticize religion if it is offensive to someone's feelings? I hope you realize how quickly this could devolve back into medieval circumstances.

The Catholic Church set hard boundaries on "offensive" language too, just as Islam does today. Think of how many people had to be burned at the stake before people finally came to their senses about that. Maybe the modern generation of Europeans will have to experience the same cycle with Islam (which never experienced a humanistic Renaissance or Enlightenment) before they remember these things again.

[Words of Joy]

Would we want to allow to have a boundary? I personally would say: yes. I think boundaries could be good. If one knows up front it might be hurtful to one or more persons, is it than a good thing to move forward nonetheless?

If we aren't allowed to say things simply because they may hurt someone else's feelings, that implies that feelings and emotion are more important than honesty, logic, and reasoning. It implies that feeling good is the ultimate goal of dialogue, rather than seeking truth or any other worthwhile objective.

It also implies that we are responsible for how other people feel, no matter how unreasonable their feelings may be. I personally believe that we are each responsible for our own feelings, and no one else can truly make us feel anything. Therefore you cannot be held responsible for how you "make" me feel.

Religious debates are a classic example of this. Religious people get offended very easily. So now we can't criticize religion if it is offensive to someone's feelings? I hope you realize how quickly this could devolve back into medieval circumstances.

The Catholic Church set hard boundaries on "offensive" language too, just as Islam does today. Think of how many people had to be burned at the stake before people finally came to their senses about that. Maybe the modern generation of Europeans will have to experience the same cycle with Islam (which never experienced a humanistic Renaissance or Enlightenment) before they remember these things again.

Sure, I understand not easy to please everyone. And giving an opinion is always possible I think. Though personally don't think for example that a sense of humor doesn't have a boundary. Although I'm not agreeing with certain catholic perspectives, or muslim perspectives. I would not choose to use their believe in my jokes. For me personal there is a boundary. I understand that not everyone shares this perspective. Though I'm looking for the stance of the moderation team given the situation.

[Gemma13]

I had to process the format Mike used here to consider the ethical implications.

Comedy is a universal language and when not done right slips into categories of awful abuse.

Those that have the gift for writing and delivering comedy by their chosen format, (which I personally think Mike has after reading his sermon), provide not only bubbly entertainment, but thought provoking ideas that can inspire people to think about sensitive and conflicting topics; be it racism, politics, social movements, or, in the case on Avalon, religious icons.

Masterful comedy provides debate in a confronting but safe format.

The other member has had little regard for insulting those of considerable religious faith with his/her hubris, let alone the repetitive invitation for members to communicate and be “saved” by the claimed messiah.

Does this mean insulting him/her back is the right course? No. But calling them out and challenging them is required and it can be done properly in various language formats; compassion being one, valor another and comedy another.

For me personally, I am sooo tired of “these types” in our community. Do the good work. But if you are genuine, imo, you won’t be proclaiming to the world that you are better than everyone else by hiding behind a religious icon, or making one up!

Why should we allow these personalities to have their stage without challenging them; heck we have enough of these types running the world claiming their way is the only way be it religious doctrine, dictatorship, capitalism, or any other BS that promotes inequality and abuse.

I actually have a great deal of compassion for those with mental disorders that have them convinced their behaviours are justified, but I do not believe they should be given free rein because of their disorder. To me it is no different than letting a pedophile have free rein in a community, (let alone the right to govern), because he suffers from a mental disorder. No, enough is enough!

[Bill Ryan]

Mike (one of the best storytellers on the forum - and the funniest.)


Does the Avalon have guidelines on this?

My briefest answer: Mike's not really channeling Satan. He's channeling George Carlin. :)

And Carlin would have been most welcome here. His mission was to wake people up and tell truth through inspired, incisive humor. Some of his lines would have sliced a steel bar in half. But he was never unkind, to anyone.

Truth is what the forum is all about (humor, too, of course!), and I do think this thread counts as that.

:focus:

A question, then:

Does George Carlin now sit at your right hand? Or has he gone UP, the other way?

[lake]

Well ain't this true??


https://i.imgur.com/AkeL7cF.jpg

:Angel:

[AutumnW]

Ahhh Satan, an able wordsmith, hammering out superbly crafted prose in the foundries of HELL!

Hmmm....questions. Boxers or briefs? Does the forked tail represent a problem getting dressed? And besides flames about three feet tall, what really burns your ass?:confused:

[AutumnW]

Is it true that you are real pretty? Like a beautiful dawn?


In Ezekiel 28:12-19 we have a true picture of Satan. “You were the seal of perfection, Full of wisdom and perfect in beauty . . . You were the anointed cherub who covers; I established you . . . you were perfect in your ways from the day you were created.”

It's stated there that you are an anointed cherub!
Isn't that just the little flying naked babies things, with bow and arrows??

Or are you just an arse?

Do you actually 'own' this world?


Jesus calls Satan, “the ruler of this world.” John 12:31. The Apostle Paul calls him “the god of this age.” 2 Corinthians 4:4.

Or is it just a rental?

Just want to quick step in here and pass on what I just learned a few days ago, coincidentally. The original cherubim are not babies at all but adult. The baby thing got started in the Renaissance, probably with artists like Michaelangelo.

[Bill Ryan]

I just started this thread.


A Merry Christmas 2018, to everyone reading this. BUT — What does it mean?? (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105460-A-Merry-Christmas-2018-to-everyone-reading-this.-BUT----What-does-it-mean)

My question:

Do you have a birthday? Is it classified? Does anyone celebrate it? Do you?

[A Voice from the Mountains]

Sure, I understand not easy to please everyone.

It's not just a matter of not being easy. I don't even try to please everyone. Nor is it my goal in life to simply feel as good as possible. I do all sorts of things to take myself out of my comfort zone and challenge myself in order to grow as a person, and that's not the same as just trying to feel good and make everyone else feel good. In the end, I don't believe chasing pleasure is what will make me satisfied in life.

Just to expand on this, it's the historical philosophy of hedonism.


Hedonism is a school of thought that argues that the pursuit of pleasure and intrinsic goods are the primary or most important goals of human life.[1] A hedonist strives to maximize net pleasure (pleasure minus pain). However upon finally gaining said pleasure, happiness may remain stationary.

Ethical hedonism is the idea that all people have the right to do everything in their power to achieve the greatest amount of pleasure possible to them. It is also the idea that every person's pleasure should far surpass their amount of pain. Ethical hedonism is said to have been started by Aristippus of Cyrene, a student of Socrates. He held the idea that pleasure is the highest good.[2]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedonism

If anything I am more of a Stoic.


Stoicism is predominantly a philosophy of personal ethics informed by its system of logic and its views on the natural world. According to its teachings, as social beings, the path to happiness for humans is found in accepting the moment as it presents itself, by not allowing oneself to be controlled by the desire for pleasure or fear of pain, by using one's mind to understand the world and to do one's part in nature's plan, and by working together and treating others fairly and justly.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stoicism

In Buddhism, chasing after pleasure is also seen as a vice. In many religions, actually, simply living to seek after pleasure is seem as degenerate and sinful. I happen to agree with this particular view of things. The truth hurts sometimes, but I still want to know it. It's the only way forward, as far as I'm concerned. Obviously others may disagree. But you can't force hedonism on everybody, if only because hedonists make poor soldiers. :P

[Mike]

Hedonists can also make the best soldiers. To some, war is the party, and plunging a bayonet into an enemy's abdomen the addictive drug.

Pleasure seeking is also the quickest way of conquering pleasure seeking. Denying one's vices, be they drink, drugs, sex, only shifts the mental obsession; all you've done now is become obsessed with not doing these things as opposed to being obsessed with doing them. The pathology still remains...despite your burnt-orange robe and beggars bowl and buzz cut and manufactured malnourishment.

Ever tried reading the bible with an erection? Best to go sniff coke off stripper's tits for a year or 3, and get it out of your system, organically. Play with your toys until you are good and sick of them, and then move on. At the very least you'll spare yourself the embarrassing announcement to family and friends that your 2 week conversion to buddhism was a failure. No one likes embarrassment and no one likes a failure.

What if this "organic" process ends the life of the experimenter? I get that annoying question all the time, and to that i say this: when viewed against eternity, it's not a tragedy. This hypothetical man or woman has not "wasted their life", they have sacrificed it nobly to exhaust an addiction or 2. Their next life will no longer include those nuisances.

Do you doubt this? Search your feelings Luuuuke....you know this to be true.

[Mike]

Mike (one of the best storytellers on the forum - and the funniest.)


Does the Avalon have guidelines on this?

My briefest answer: Mike's not really channeling Satan. He's channeling George Carlin. :)

And Carlin would have been most welcome here. His mission was to wake people up and tell truth through inspired, incisive humor. Some of his lines would have sliced a steel bar in half. But he was never unkind, to anyone.

Truth is what the forum is all about (humor, too, of course!), and I do think this thread counts as that.

:focus:

A question, then:

Does George Carlin now sit at your right hand? Or has he gone UP, the other way?


George Carlin! George Carlin! It's all I ever hear...as if I have him chained to a cage, writing my bloody material for me or something.

It was flattering at first, but now I've grown to resent it.

The truth is, I wrote his jokes. We made a little deal, he and I (no, no it had nothing to do with souls!). You'll notice that he was a short-haired, relatively mild version of himself early on...and then he reemerged rather spontaneously with longer hair and edgier stuff in the later years...that was all me.

Where is he now? Well i don't have all the answers man. Who do you think i am, Corey Goode?

Next time you're in a city, look up at the tallest buildings. You'll likely see a window-washer or two. If there was a car crash a couple blocks down, they'd likely see it. Here's a tip: Myself and all the so called evil entities under me, we don't necessarily know more than you folks, nor are we even more intelligent. It's just that from where we're standing, we can see a little further down the road.

But I will say this: when strong personalities reincarnate, later in life they begin to look like their previous incarnation. I have an inkling who Carlin will be next, but I'd rather not say - predictions aren't my business, they ruin careers. Just ask David Wilcock. btw, he was a pudgy lesbian in his last life. Strong personality too.

[Mike]

What the **** is wrong with you people? Why is no one thanking my posts? You should be paying me to do this.

[A Voice from the Mountains]

Pleasure seeking is also the quickest way of conquering pleasure seeking. Denying one's vices, be they drink, drugs, sex, only shifts the mental obsession; all you've done now is become obsessed with not doing these things as opposed to being obsessed with doing them.

If you don't address the underlying needs for craving these things in the first place, then sure, you will simply suppress them. But that's exactly what a hedonist would do, isn't it?: refuse to face the music directly, because it's uncomfortable, and hedonists are slaves to their animal natures, or perhaps think that humans are nothing more than animals to begin with.


Best to go sniff coke off stripper's tits for a year or 3, and get it out of your system, organically.

That's one way to do it. And being the devil that you are, I'm sure it wouldn't bother you when the stripper grows old alone with her cats, or whatever old codger she can convince to keep her warm for a night, and becomes miserable and hates her life in her old age, wondering what she even lives for. I know it doesn't bother me, but neither do I get any enjoyment out of stripper tits. To me, the whole degenerate scene just seems sad and boring, like a Bukowski poem, apparently a hero of yours. I leave that to you guys to define your lives by.


At the very least you'll spare yourself the embarrassing announcement to family and friends that your 2 week conversion to buddhism was a failure. No one likes embarrassment and no one likes a failure.

None of my buddies who used to like partying at strip clubs had much of a family to embarrass themselves with in the first place, but I'm sure the devil knows all about that too. I mean if someone's thing is snorting coke off of hooker tits, or living the general slob life of a Bukowski, I'm not exactly imagining a "Leave It to Beaver" family here.


What if this "organic" process ends the life of the experimenter? I get that annoying question all the time, and to that i say this: when viewed against eternity, it's not a tragedy.

If someone has to convince themselves that their life isn't a tragedy, then I have a feeling it's not a life that they would have chosen, if they ever actually had the willpower to make their own choices, beyond their animal urges.

[Mike]

Ahhh Satan, an able wordsmith, hammering out superbly crafted prose in the foundries of HELL!

Hmmm....questions. Boxers or briefs? Does the forked tail represent a problem getting dressed? And besides flames about three feet tall, what really burns your ass?:confused:


Under normal circumstances I would not answer such ludicrous questions. But you've complimented my writing, and that goes a long way with me.

Boxers or briefs? This all depends on the body I'm inhabiting at the time (On earth, I have a few bodies I use , 3 to be exact, Mike being one..and I regard them like a man might regard a car collection). Mike favors boxer/briefs. Benitho Massaro, on the other hand, prefers something akin to a thong...and spends inordinate amounts of time inspecting himself in it in front of a mirror. He smiles, pouts, and poses...but ultimately winds up face down in his bed, sobbing uncontrollably. Sometimes, in situations like these, another thong wearing man - tan, good looking, Caesar haircut - will arrive and feed him organic strawberries dipped in homemade whipped cream. I dunno, make of it what you will.

Times up. If you want answers to the tail thing youll have to insert a few more quarters.

[shaberon]

But you use words like geomatraic...I don't know what that means and that makes me feel insecure and slightly off-balance.

Nice post, but don't sound so impressive next time. Leave that to me, okay?

People are really stupid, this is true, but they're the only entertainment I've got. I'm stuck in this time-space, like a bug in ember....so like you i foster situations that create fear and anxiety...and that's my sustenance.

Your various names sound like synthetic fabric? Why is that?[COLOR="red"]




Sorry to math out a little bit on you. Geomatria is like a phone number without any phone, anyone's name can be converted to a number, and I just plug a thought into the result and it goes to the recipient. My name is only recorded as STRT and you have to fill in the blanks differently depending on whether you need a man or a woman. I was hoping to be associated with those splendid Phoenician purple textiles, and it must be somewhere in declaring the evils of "Reefer Madness" that the purveyors of synthetics have gotten me mixed up. It may be a modern version of trying to re-brand us like they did in the old days. No matter what they do, the synthetics can never truly replace the naturals. Escaping from a brass bottle is nowhere near as challenging as trying to oust one's limbs from a knot of someone else's panty hose. It's probably just a "sign of the times"...just because I may get my hands on a lot of modern clothing, it's just an attempt to remove it. I had nothing to do with it being there in the first place.

The main use I have for petroleum is to strike a natural gas vent with lightning, to make an eternal flame. I'm sure there are copy cats and others who try to involve me with things I would never be interested in, like plastic. It's weird about how our names get dragged around by people who don't know us, while we know them, very well. I'm not really going to do anything to clear up the misunderstanding. There is too much bad music being played, and too many inflatable snowmen made out of those newer fabrics. I'll just take the hit and surround myself with countless indulgences in the ruins of Sodom. It will be an open-door, come-as-you-are party, but the "mixed cloth" I prefer blasphemers to arrive in, would be linen and flax. If you haven't been wearing only pure linen or anything else pure, welpers, there goes that soul, pitchforked into that great garbage incinerator called the earth's core.

[Orph]

In my last life, I was cooking in front of an old cast iron stove. You know, the kind you have to keep a fire going. Well, being the manly-man that I was, ........... I farted. I don't need to tell you that everything went up in a huge ball of fire. Oh, I'm telling you, it was a sight to see. Yup. I died in a big flaming inferno.

So naturally I thought to myself, "WOW. This ought to solidify my place in Hell for sure"! But nooooooooooooooo. Here I am again, back on planet Earth. So what-the-hell does it take for a person to get into Hell anyway?
:flame:

[Pam]

Don’t bring your stories to Avalon as you will be ripped six ways to Sunday.

(A brief informational injection here. :) )

Actually, that's hardly true. All members know that. It almost never happens.

Do read this thread. It's jam-packed with extraordinary personal stories, shared very openly and in considerable detail, that there's zero reason to doubt. Do please take a look.


EXPERIENCERS: Sharing, Exploring, and Learning Together (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105066-EXPERIENCERS-Sharing-Exploring-and-Learning-Together)

Re Astar of David, he hasn't visited this thread — and is unlikely to. He very rarely visits any threads other than his own. (That may tell us something, of course.)

:focus:

Are you saying that because someone presents a story that we have reason to doubt, that makes it acceptable to make a satire and subsequently ridicule his thread? The title of this thread was clearly meant to match the other thread. If Mike wanted to make a humorous satire thread about satan he could have created a title that didn't immediately identify it as a response to the other thread. I think this is really in poor taste, and I feel for the person that made the other thread. Whether you believe him or not, I do believe he is sincerely believes what he is saying.

[Bill Ryan]

The title of this thread was clearly meant to match the other thread. If Mike wanted to make a humorous satire thread about satan he could have created a title that didn't immediately identify it as a response to the other thread.

Yes... it was a satirical dig. Prompted by the other thread, of course. That's simply what gave him the idea... as I mentioned above, right out of George Carlin's book.

But now, the thread has morphed (and evolved) into stand-up comedy, some of which is really very funny. And clearly appreciated by many members, who are happily joining in. No harm is intended to anyone: not one of the members posting here is like that.

Mike purposefully put it in Known Hoaxes and Other Bad Information (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/forumdisplay.php?160-Known-Hoaxes-and-Other-Bad-Information), but it could equally well have gone into The Lighter Side (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/forumdisplay.php?64-The-Lighter-Side).

I also mentioned above that Astar hasn't ever viewed this thread, and is extremely unlikely to. He almost never views any threads other than his own.

He's really using the forum as a personal didactic blog. One suggestion we might make to him, if he persists, is to simply start his own blog or make videos on YouTube. Regardless of the veracity of his claims, it's the I-know-more-than-you-all-do stance (or belief!) that doesn't fit very well here. If anyone acts like that, regardless of what they're talking about, it's likely to end in tears.

:focus:

[Cerridwen]

Ahhhh ... Satan, how I've missed you. A mutual dark and fallen angel friend of ours whispered rumors of your sighting here in Avalon to me this morning, and I decided to have a look myself.

You always did know how to make a woman smile. Keep up the good work, my friend.

[Antagenet]

Merry Christmas Satan, I hope you are feeling mighty terrible today, since I know you enjoy that so much.

The last time I saw you was at my fathers deathbed, well technically I didn't see you, but from the look
on my fathers face, I know he did. You must be GodAwful Ugly. I hope you are keeping him happy there in Hell
so he doesn't escape.

Some of the other sociopaths in my family are getting on in years. I just want to make sure you have their
number, address and current status. Don't bother contacting me as I am and have always been completely
unavailable to you.

Let me be clear, I am not making a deal with you. Just a suggestion.
Sociopaths make delicious kindling.

[Mike]

Pleasure seeking is also the quickest way of conquering pleasure seeking. Denying one's vices, be they drink, drugs, sex, only shifts the mental obsession; all you've done now is become obsessed with not doing these things as opposed to being obsessed with doing them.

If you don't address the underlying needs for craving these things in the first place, then sure, you will simply suppress them. But that's exactly what a hedonist would do, isn't it?: refuse to face the music directly, because it's uncomfortable, and hedonists are slaves to their animal natures, or perhaps think that humans are nothing more than animals to begin with.


Best to go sniff coke off stripper's tits for a year or 3, and get it out of your system, organically.

That's one way to do it. And being the devil that you are, I'm sure it wouldn't bother you when the stripper grows old alone with her cats, or whatever old codger she can convince to keep her warm for a night, and becomes miserable and hates her life in her old age, wondering what she even lives for. I know it doesn't bother me, but neither do I get any enjoyment out of stripper tits. To me, the whole degenerate scene just seems sad and boring, like a Bukowski poem, apparently a hero of yours. I leave that to you guys to define your lives by.


At the very least you'll spare yourself the embarrassing announcement to family and friends that your 2 week conversion to buddhism was a failure. No one likes embarrassment and no one likes a failure.

None of my buddies who used to like partying at strip clubs had much of a family to embarrass themselves with in the first place, but I'm sure the devil knows all about that too. I mean if someone's thing is snorting coke off of hooker tits, or living the general slob life of a Bukowski, I'm not exactly imagining a "Leave It to Beaver" family here.


What if this "organic" process ends the life of the experimenter? I get that annoying question all the time, and to that i say this: when viewed against eternity, it's not a tragedy.

If someone has to convince themselves that their life isn't a tragedy, then I have a feeling it's not a life that they would have chosen, if they ever actually had the willpower to make their own choices, beyond their animal urges.



Yeah yeah, you've made your points well.

But don't let Satan trick you into being thoughtful. Some of the things i write are true, some bullsh!t, some designed to get a specific reaction, some designed to get none. It's best to just ignore me.

The degenerate scene *is* sad and boring. And anyone indulging it, worth a sh!t, will sort this out relatively quickly. But most have to experience it first before they renounce it. Renouncing blindly, without the experience, is nothing more than repression. It's mental and emotional constipation.

Bukowksi himself couldn't have said it any better.

As far as his being a hero...
Most people are aware when they've surpassed their heroes, or when they first notice that the poet has no clothes. They tend to ignore it, because it's much easier to look up to someone and adopt their thinking than accept the fact that they are now alone on a mountaintop and fully responsible for their own. We love our artists partly because they do our thinking and feeling for us. Nice of them, in a way.

A guy like Bukowski put generations of misfits on his back, and did all the heavy lifting for them. Sure, you grow out of him at some point, but you grow out of your parents as well...it doesn't make them any less necessary and important to your growth. We honor them in all sorts of ways for it....and Mike does this by using him as an avatar.

P.S. I resent you for engendering this serious response. Way to ruin the mood. We'll be bumping into each other soon

[Mike]

Ahhhh ... Satan, how I've missed you. A mutual dark and fallen angel friend of ours whispered rumors of your sighting here in Avalon to me this morning, and I decided to have a look myself.

You always did know how to make a woman smile. Keep up the good work,


Firstly, it is lovely to see you here. I knew something was up when all the vials of blood in my fridge began spitting and frothing. And then there were the 3rd eye visions of a world travelling, sequined top and bottom wearing belly dancer...and I only know one person who fits the profile. Have you arrived to help me do battle, fair maiden? Or are you merely teasing me with a token appearance? Either way, Satan is honored.

I really only do things to make women smile. Even now, 15 billion years old and a fully grown demon, I live only to show off for female humans. I have not come a very long way.

This fallen angel you speak of....does he favor black clothing and dull earth tones? Is he at least 15% gay? Bizarre obsession with Freddie Mercury and David Bowie? Aristocratic nose and a charming dignity? Very witty fellow, is he? Known to throw a tantrum from to time? Am I hot or cold?

[Gemma13]

Imagination is key in this thread! Imagine you are sitting in the audience at a George Carlin, Russell Brand (his latest life performance video is good by the way), Carl Barron, or any other such notable comedian’s live performance and they invite you to a Q&A – then fire away!

Oh, and thick skin and keen reflexes to dodge bullets are an essential.
If you’re one of those people that doesn't like being singled out because you’re sitting too close to the stage – RUN! :silent:

[Gemma13]

So what-the-hell does it take for a person to get into Hell anyway?
:flame:

Oooh Satan, that’s a goodie – should have you drooling awhile over all the instructions and examples you can seduce us with.

[Gemma13]

What the **** is wrong with you people? Why is no one thanking my posts? You should be paying me to do this.

No post thanks from me mate, so get over it!

(But I am secretly relishing every word) :blushing:

[A Voice from the Mountains]

P.S. I resent you for engendering this serious response. Way to ruin the mood. We'll be bumping into each other soon

Well, the poor Messiah was already catching some hell, and I know Satan can never get enough of it. :dancing:

I used to read Bukowski's poetry, or I would have never recognized his mug. It was one of those things where after I got enough of a taste of it, I got foundered on it, as we like to say out here in the sticks.

[Cerridwen]

Ahhhh ... Satan, how I've missed you. A mutual dark and fallen angel friend of ours whispered rumors of your sighting here in Avalon to me this morning, and I decided to have a look myself.

You always did know how to make a woman smile. Keep up the good work,


Firstly, it is lovely to see you here. I knew something was up when all the vials of blood in my fridge began spitting and frothing. And then there were the 3rd eye visions of a world travelling, sequined top and bottom wearing belly dancer...and I only know one person who fits the profile. Have you arrived to help me do battle, fair maiden? Or are you merely teasing me with a token appearance? Either way, Satan is honored.

I really only do things to make women smile. Even now, 15 billion years old and a fully grown demon, I live only to show off for female humans. I have not come a very long way.

This fallen angel you speak of....does he favor black clothing and dull earth tones? Is he at least 15% gay? Bizarre obsession with Freddie Mercury and David Bowie? Aristocratic nose and a charming dignity? Very witty fellow, is he? Known to throw a tantrum from to time? Am I hot or cold?

You know me, I come and go as the North Wind blows. I will assist you in battle if it pleases me, but I also love a good tease, so time will tell.

Oh Dark One, we both know that you are always HOT. ;) But yes, that is the very same fallen angel that I speak of, except I believe the gay percentage it closer to 12.5%

[Carmody]

Stop it Mike, yer killin' me.

Where does this all come from? Obvious, to me. Mike is now post 'Pluto square'* and seemingly ruminating on something that is fading.. but he can still feel and taste it.


*Where firing on all cylinders at maximum breakdown rpm 24/7.... for a ~+1.5 year long time.... is the minimum sentence. You get good or you get broken. Either will do and sometimes you get both. Maximum phoenix burn down the house stuff. Next up: Uranus opposition. (everybody gets these things, these are outer planet alignments that take place in a given human lifetime)

So, are you like the storm, or sumpthin? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yuGcwWDA1shttp://)

[AutumnW]

Ahhh Satan, an able wordsmith, hammering out superbly crafted prose in the foundries of HELL!

Hmmm....questions. Boxers or briefs? Does the forked tail represent a problem getting dressed? And besides flames about three feet tall, what really burns your ass?:confused:

Under normal circumstances I would not answer such ludicrous questions. But you've complimented my writing, and that goes a long way with me.

Boxers or briefs? This all depends on the body I'm inhabiting at the time (On earth, I have a few bodies I use , 3 to be exact, Mike being one..and I regard them like a man might regard a car collection). Mike favors boxer/briefs. Benitho Massaro, on the other hand, prefers something akin to a thong...and spends inordinate amounts of time inspecting himself in it in front of a mirror. He smiles, pouts, and poses...but ultimately winds up face down in his bed, sobbing uncontrollably. Sometimes, in situations like these, another thong wearing man - tan, good looking, Caesar haircut - will arrive and feed him organic strawberries dipped in homemade whipped cream. I dunno, make of it what you will.

Times up. If you want answers to the tail thing youll have to insert a few more quarters.

Where should I insert those quarters? Pleeeeeze don't answer that one!:(

I have another question. I have heard the expression, "sympathy for the devil," and wonder if you are down with that? Do you enjoy compassion for what may be perceived as your plight?

[Mike]

I'm able to relate to different perspectives on the approach to the root of this topic. I agree we should try not to hurt each other. I agree that having a sense of humor to relieve pressure can be a good thing. I agree that having freedom of speech is a foundation which we should all be able to rely on. Though where lies the boundary? Would we want to allow to have a boundary? I personally would say: yes. I think boundaries could be good. If one knows up front it might be hurtful to one or more persons, is it than a good thing to move forward nonetheless? If one wasn't analyzing the impact before posting, does it make it less impacting? If someone creates a thread that offends others, though might have personal challenges, what action is then desired?

Personally I think the moderating team has a great responsibility in these matters and I've seen that at least one action has been taken and maybe more. I was pleased to see action was taken and am kind of surprised this thread is now life. Which makes me wonder whether or not this was discussed across the full width of the moderating team. And leaves imo the questions: what is the stance of the team regarding these situations and how would they like the community to handle such situations? Does the Avalon have guidelines on this?



I'm going to go ahead and assume that your parents didn't select that name for you: Slobbe. Is it pronouned as it sounds? (Slob?). Why would you choose that when so many other horrible names are still available, like Slovenly Bum, or Putrid Sh!t Stain?

Bill has articulated my feelings for me on these matters you bring up in his recent posts here, so I will only add one thing: yes, I was hoping David would arrive here and dialogue a little. But my intent was never to be cruel or mean to him...i only wanted to point out some glaring inconsistencies and expose what seems to be utter silliness to me.

Here is a man who genuinely thinks he's Christ. Logic and reason could not unlock his sensible side, so I've attempted humor, or some version of it. I use it only as tool, my friend.

Sometimes this approach will even fall short. Don't listen to anyone who tells you humor will solve all the world's problems. Not true. I possessed this little kid once, and convinced him that humor would solve all his problems, and watched in stitches as he told an hour's worth of knock knock jokes to a piece of dog sh!t his mother had ordered him to clean up the day before. The confused look on that kids face was just priceless.

[waves]

I'm going to go ahead and assume that your parents didn't select that name for you: Slobbe......

Man was I glad I'd just missed having a mouthful of coffee when casually reaching that line......

[Mike]

Ahhhh ... Satan, how I've missed you. A mutual dark and fallen angel friend of ours whispered rumors of your sighting here in Avalon to me this morning, and I decided to have a look myself.

You always did know how to make a woman smile. Keep up the good work,


Firstly, it is lovely to see you here. I knew something was up when all the vials of blood in my fridge began spitting and frothing. And then there were the 3rd eye visions of a world travelling, sequined top and bottom wearing belly dancer...and I only know one person who fits the profile. Have you arrived to help me do battle, fair maiden? Or are you merely teasing me with a token appearance? Either way, Satan is honored.

I really only do things to make women smile. Even now, 15 billion years old and a fully grown demon, I live only to show off for female humans. I have not come a very long way.

This fallen angel you speak of....does he favor black clothing and dull earth tones? Is he at least 15% gay? Bizarre obsession with Freddie Mercury and David Bowie? Aristocratic nose and a charming dignity? Very witty fellow, is he? Known to throw a tantrum from to time? Am I hot or cold?

You know me, I come and go as the North Wind blows. I will assist you in battle if it pleases me, but I also love a good tease, so time will tell.

Oh Dark One, we both know that you are always HOT. ;) But yes, that is the very same fallen angel that I speak of, except I believe the gay percentage it closer to 12.5%


Yes, i've since spoken to said fallen angel, and he insists it's 12.5%. But he was listening to Abba as he was declaring this, so I find that statement dubious.

As I was reading your post, I was certain you were going to write, I will assist you in battle if it pleases "you." You left me off-balance and full of admiration with the "me"..

..with all these demons kissing my ass for so long I almost forgot what it was like to have someone consider themselves first. It was charming..but don't get too carried away.

touche, princess.

[Mike]

Stop it Mike, yer killin' me.

Where does this all come from? Obvious, to me. Mike is now post 'Pluto square'* and seemingly ruminating on something that is fading.. but he can still feel and taste it.


*Where firing on all cylinders at maximum breakdown rpm 24/7.... for a ~+1.5 year long time.... is the minimum sentence. You get good or you get broken. Either will do and sometimes you get both. Maximum phoenix burn down the house stuff. Next up: Uranus opposition. (everybody gets these things, these are outer planet alignments that take place in a given human lifetime)

So, are you like the storm, or sumpthin? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yuGcwWDA1shttp://)



not sure why you folks insist on calling me Mike. why I outta...mumble mumble.

the stars do not dictate to me, i dictate to them. oh i feel their influence from time to time, but it's nothing more than a small nuisance...like trying to flick a booger off your thumb and having it get stuck on your middle finger, then back to your thumb, then your middle finger...

The more broken i become, the good'er I get.
utEEe97Ir4o

[Mike]

Merry Christmas Satan, I hope you are feeling mighty terrible today, since I know you enjoy that so much.

The last time I saw you was at my fathers deathbed, well technically I didn't see you, but from the look
on my fathers face, I know he did. You must be GodAwful Ugly. I hope you are keeping him happy there in Hell
so he doesn't escape.

Some of the other sociopaths in my family are getting on in years. I just want to make sure you have their
number, address and current status. Don't bother contacting me as I am and have always been completely
unavailable to you.

Let me be clear, I am not making a deal with you. Just a suggestion.
Sociopaths make delicious kindling.


well i'm merely an expression of energy, like everything else. as i descend dimensions, my ideas about myself and the ideas of others, about me, sort of mold me into a humanoid form. And when i reach what you would call the 3rd dimension, it's the observing individual's imagination that fills in the blanks. I appear differently to everybody.

people i touch and influence are often called sociopaths. sigh. Some of the predominant expressions of this are glibness and superficial charm, which i clearly have in spades.

Listen up because this is important: the average person doesn't dislike the average sociopath because of his glibness and superficial charm, they dislike the sociopath because he's so good at deploying it. it's a form of jealousy.

Everyone you meet is lying constantly, including you. Lies make the world go 'round. Glib charmers have adapted brilliantly to this, that's all.

As the kids say: don't hate the player, hate the game

[Mike]

In my last life, I was cooking in front of an old cast iron stove. You know, the kind you have to keep a fire going. Well, being the manly-man that I was, ........... I farted. I don't need to tell you that everything went up in a huge ball of fire. Oh, I'm telling you, it was a sight to see. Yup. I died in a big flaming inferno.

So naturally I thought to myself, "WOW. This ought to solidify my place in Hell for sure"! But nooooooooooooooo. Here I am again, back on planet Earth. So what-the-hell does it take for a person to get into Hell anyway?
:flame:


Hell is not a place, it's a state of mind.
...
...
...
...
Ah, just joking. I always wanted to know what it would feel like to say that. I even crossed my arms and smiled smugly afterwards, but there was no one there to witness it. drats.

Farts like that suggest testosterone and virility. I bet you have a really hairy back. Shave it. that's step 1. See me after and we'll start on the diabolical stuff.

[Cerridwen]

Ahhhh ... Satan, how I've missed you. A mutual dark and fallen angel friend of ours whispered rumors of your sighting here in Avalon to me this morning, and I decided to have a look myself.

You always did know how to make a woman smile. Keep up the good work,


Firstly, it is lovely to see you here. I knew something was up when all the vials of blood in my fridge began spitting and frothing. And then there were the 3rd eye visions of a world travelling, sequined top and bottom wearing belly dancer...and I only know one person who fits the profile. Have you arrived to help me do battle, fair maiden? Or are you merely teasing me with a token appearance? Either way, Satan is honored.

I really only do things to make women smile. Even now, 15 billion years old and a fully grown demon, I live only to show off for female humans. I have not come a very long way.

This fallen angel you speak of....does he favor black clothing and dull earth tones? Is he at least 15% gay? Bizarre obsession with Freddie Mercury and David Bowie? Aristocratic nose and a charming dignity? Very witty fellow, is he? Known to throw a tantrum from to time? Am I hot or cold?

You know me, I come and go as the North Wind blows. I will assist you in battle if it pleases me, but I also love a good tease, so time will tell.

Oh Dark One, we both know that you are always HOT. ;) But yes, that is the very same fallen angel that I speak of, except I believe the gay percentage it closer to 12.5%


Yes, i've since spoken to said fallen angel, and he insists it's 12.5%. But he was listening to Abba as he was declaring this, so I find that statement dubious.

As I was reading your post, I was certain you were going to write, I will assist you in battle if it pleases "you." You left me off-balance and full of admiration with the "me"..

..with all these demons kissing my ass for so long I almost forgot what it was like to have someone consider themselves first. It was charming..but don't get too carried away.

touche, princess.

Princess Cerridwen, I like the sound of that. 👸🏻

I forgot about his Abba collection. You might be correct with that 15% after all.

[Hym]

Geez... I do not know of the Christ thread, that some say is the antithesis of this one, but no doubt the real Christ would love, would have loved, is loving, will love, this thread.

And yes, before I finished reading the first paragraph, and without even reading anything further, I wanted to Thank every single post, seeing the value of the discussion and knowing that many here would make this a very lively, funny and insightful journey. I have never done that here or even thought of doing that, anywhere. Reading further on, I was right in feeling that I'd love it. Bill Hicks, George and Groucho would all be open to doing some serious road gigs with you.

Chilling on my birthday, not really one to treat one day of living like any other, as if words and assumptions and norms define anyone and as if I didn't value the life for each awesome day it really is....I thank the days for the likes of Avalon.

I wondered onto Avalon to consort with the cool ones, part of the family that I choose amongst those who inhabit the conscious realms....having had years between the living constant of now and the past stagnant listening to the many biological brothers and sisters wishing empty wishes and speaking no truths of purpose and insight.

The incarnate evil one is very nervous around me anyway....for good reason. I'm not part of the play.

[Mike]

Geez... I do not know of the Christ thread, that some say is the antithesis of this one, but no doubt the real Christ would love, would have loved, is loving, will love, this thread.

And yes, before I finished reading the first paragraph, and without even reading anything further, I wanted to Thank every single post, seeing the value of the discussion and knowing that many here would make this a very lively, funny and insightful journey. I have never done that here or even thought of doing that, anywhere. Reading further on, I was right in feeling that I'd love it. Bill Hicks, George and Groucho would all be open to doing some serious road gigs with you.

Chilling on my birthday, not really one to treat one day of living like any other, as if words and assumptions and norms define anyone and as if I didn't value the life for each awesome day it really is....I thank the days for the likes of Avalon.

I wondered onto Avalon to consort with the cool ones, part of the family that I choose amongst those who inhabit the conscious realms....having had years between the living constant of now and the past stagnant listening to the many biological brothers and sisters wishing empty wishes and speaking no truths of purpose and insight.

The incarnate evil one is very nervous around me anyway....for good reason. I'm not part of the play.



happy belated birthday friend, and lovely post.

what did you do on your birthday? any good gifts?

well, many happy returns.

(my manager tells me i need to be more relatable. was that good? it felt relatable to me)

[Hym]

Say-tawn,( the formal name in transliteration from another well known tribe ) or Satan, or You who be Saint'n.... :

You might, or might not, allow Mike to jump in now as you may find the message a bit much, something that even your manager would consider way too relatable.

Thanks, Mikey. Didn't do much different on my birthday, kinda like I said in the post. I did cut more firewood, insulated some areas in the water heater room, played in the snow with our dog, fell on my ass play fighting with him-house shoes on snow-slippery, jumped on the trampoline, wrote a little, cleaned up a little, played the guitar, sang some songs, consoled and cajoled a holiday-depressed friend, talked with my son on his travels. A fun, funny and normal day for me.

The only gift was a handwritten card my son left for me on a piece of typing paper like I do for him, with some drawings on it. Very cool letter. Cool drawings.

As during the years we give things to each other when the opportunity arrises, it doesn't make much sense to just light up any single day. It always is more genuine and from the heart when there are no boundaries or the exclusion of days not celebrated, days that should be celebrated. I did the same with his mother when she was living, even though I would find her or make her something special on her birthday as well.

The gifts I do receive always seem to be insights, like this quite "lovely" thread you are inhabiting, my friend.

[Mike]

Well that was unnecessary Hym. I was only pretending to be interested.

But thanks for playin.

[onawah]

I am waxing reminiscent for old days of Through the Looking Glass, though of course, one critical player from that land is still missing here, and is unlikely to make a comeback, unfortunately. :pout:
(If sentimentality is a sin, them I am surely bound for Satan's playground, but I see I will be in good company.)
This thread is far too amusingly dark for the likes of Mary Poppinsish me, and so I will likely remain an admiring onlooker, but a very grateful one for taking on some of the hypocrisy, :blah: envy, :boink: and sheer sour grapes :spider: that attempt to poison the Avalon springs from time to time.
To them I say :p
But to Satan/Mike and his cohorts, a hearty :handshake: and sincere :heart:

[Mike]

I am waxing reminiscent for old days of Through the Looking Glass, though of course, one critical player from that land is still missing here, and is unlikely to make a comeback, unfortunately. :pout:
(If sentimentality is a sin, them I am surely bound for Satan's playground, but I see I will be in good company.)
This thread is far too amusingly dark for the likes of Mary Poppinish me, and so I will likely remain an admiring bystander, but a very grateful one for taking on some of the hypocrisy, :blah: envy, :boink: and sheer sour grapes :spider: that attempt to poison the Avalon springs from time to time.
To them I say :p
But to Satan/Mike and his cohorts, a hearty :handshake: and sincere :heart:



Hi Nat, Mike here. I'm just reading this thread for the first time too. I went down for what felt like a 5 minute nap one day, and about a week went by. "Missing time" I think they call it. Anyway, I lost 13 pounds and look a day older.

This thread was written during that time. But it appears Satan has left me alone, for now.

Of all the time I could have gotten possessed by Satan, it had to be the during the time Christ was here. That hardly seems fair. I have so many questions.

[onawah]

You may have to move this thread to one of the Abduction forums. :lol:
And to do your experience justice, it looks like we are going to need an emoji that's the opposite of :rapture:
:kiss:

BTW, re the following ...what may appear to the unenlightened as hedonism, when practiced consciously, devotedly and with finesse, is legitimate spiritual practice known as Tantra.
http://www.rigpawiki.org/images/1/1f/Kalachakra-1.jpg:

"Hedonists can also make the best soldiers. To some, war is the party, and plunging a bayonet into an enemy's abdomen the addictive drug.

Pleasure seeking is also the quickest way of conquering pleasure seeking. Denying one's vices, be they drink, drugs, sex, only shifts the mental obsession; all you've done now is become obsessed with not doing these things as opposed to being obsessed with doing them. The pathology still remains...despite your burnt-orange robe and beggars bowl and buzz cut and manufactured malnourishment.

Ever tried reading the bible with an erection? Best to go sniff coke off stripper's tits for a year or 3, and get it out of your system, organically. Play with your toys until you are good and sick of them, and then move on. At the very least you'll spare yourself the embarrassing announcement to family and friends that your 2 week conversion to buddhism was a failure. No one likes embarrassment and no one likes a failure.

What if this "organic" process ends the life of the experimenter? I get that annoying question all the time, and to that i say this: when viewed against eternity, it's not a tragedy. This hypothetical man or woman has not "wasted their life", they have sacrificed it nobly to exhaust an addiction or 2. Their next life will no longer include those nuisances."

[DeDukshyn]

Just saw this thread today. I actually seriously thought of doing this as well, as a satire, not just to the referenced thread specifically, but I was going to water it down as a "tribute" to all the threads that have ever started in the same manner so as to not have it appear targeted. I see you threw that caution into the wind. Made me chuckle. :)

[onawah]

No watering down, please!
And no vacations are allowed in Hell, I believe, not even for the originator of this thread, whose wit is too good to allow to go to waste.
Especially on a forum where we have to deal with so much hellish stuff, we NEED to develop a devilish sense of humor.
http://freedomnationnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Hell-Teal-and-orange-950x394.jpg
Just saw this thread today. I actually seriously thought of doing this as well, as a satire, not just to the referenced thread specifically, but I was going to water it down as a "tribute" to all the threads that have ever started in the same manner so as to not have it appear targeted. I see you threw that caution into the wind. Made me chuckle. :)

[DeDukshyn]

No watering down, please!
And no vacations are allowed in Hell, I believe, not even for the originator of this thread, whose wit is too good to allow to go to waste.
Especially on a forum where we have to deal with so much hellish stuff, we NEED to develop a devilish sense of humor.
http://freedomnationnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/Hell-Teal-and-orange-950x394.jpg
Just saw this thread today. I actually seriously thought of doing this as well, as a satire, not just to the referenced thread specifically, but I was going to water it down as a "tribute" to all the threads that have ever started in the same manner so as to not have it appear targeted. I see you threw that caution into the wind. Made me chuckle. :)

I have a feeling your comment above wasn't just in reference to my comment on this thread or this thread specifically ... ;)

[onawah]

You might be right :rolleyes: :eyebrows:
And you have to admit, watering something down in Hell is just going to create a lot of sulphurous steam, not to mention dilute the fire :flame: which is so useful in burning away the dross, of which we have no lack (present company excepted).


No watering down, please!
And no vacations are allowed in Hell, I believe, not even for the originator of this thread, whose wit is too good to allow to go to waste.
Especially on a forum where we have to deal with so much hellish stuff, we NEED to develop a devilish sense of humor.

Just saw this thread today. I actually seriously thought of doing this as well, as a satire, not just to the referenced thread specifically, but I was going to water it down as a "tribute" to all the threads that have ever started in the same manner so as to not have it appear targeted. I see you threw that caution into the wind. Made me chuckle. :)

I have a feeling your comment above wasn't just in reference to my comment on this thread or this thread specifically ... ;)

Remember...
https://i.pinimg.com/236x/ce/70/d4/ce70d499c82440e3ff949aa3934a1a7c--christian-quotes.jpg

[AriG]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgnClrx8N2k

[Watching from Cyprus]

So what-the-hell does it take for a person to get into Hell anyway?
:flame:

Oooh Satan, that’s a goodie – should have you drooling awhile over all the instructions and examples you can seduce us with.

Sorry S or Marduk I presume, if I may answer that... Deceived.... This IS Hell....Welcome to the jungle friends ;-)

[DeDukshyn]

Ac01Nyu5DCI

[petra]

Passive aggressive? And here i thought I was just being aggressive.


Since when did you get so funny?! ;-)

What have you done with Mike? Give him back. :P :)

[lake]

Passive aggressive? And here i thought I was just being aggressive.


Since when did you get so funny?! ;-)

What have you done with Mike? Give him back. :P :)

No leave Mike where ever .... I think Satan is whimsical!

Hey Ugly....was this an authorised biography?

Satan by Lewis Sperry Chafer (https://www.gutenberg.org/files/12586/12586-h/12586-h.htm)

I mean....it seems to cover your whole existence up till now!

:shielddeflect:

[onawah]

FYI, Mike has ALWAYS been very funny!
It's just that he has multiple personalities, which his last post should make obvious enough.
His Satanic personality knows about Mike, Mike just doesn't know he's also Satan.
...It makes for a sort of weird session of Whose Line is it Anyway?
(Don't tell him! He's moved from NYC to Florida and they don't have nearly enough psychoanalysts there, which he would be in desperate need of, if he found out.)
OA7p0QR0UQE



Passive aggressive? And here i thought I was just being aggressive.


Since when did you get so funny?! ;-)

What have you done with Mike? Give him back. :P :)

[Mike]

..can't a 15 million year old evil god drink a little virgin blood in peace? a warning: approaching me frivolously can be dangerous. one may stray a little from convention while summoning me, but only if one is artful. Artfulness trumps everything. this dimension is about expression, mostly; whether you're Hilter or Christ matters not - it's the eloquence and force of your expression, or art, that's important. whoever articulates their spirit best, wins. it's that simple... and all you non-competitive types can groan all you like. it should be no surprise to any of you that Satan is a moral relativist.. but i am something of a creative absolutist.

Lake, your profile picture is gorgeous. Are you female? Do you look anything like that? I'm trying to determine whether it's worth it or not to keep pretending i'm interested in your mind. What is it with you people and your avatars and invented names? if you're physically ugly, i get it. But are you ashamed of your names as well? Christ, i feel like i'm playing make believe with a bunch of 10 yr olds. I don't know how Mike does it. Lake, imagine if you died tomorrow? We'd all be eulogizing a Warhol painting and an anonymous body of water. Just who the f#ck are you? Someone out there might want to know. It may even be important to them. I don't give a sh!t, but it may be important to somebody. Think about it.

Onawah, I've been meaning to ask you about that name. It sounds like the retching noise i make while vomiting up 15 guinness...oh...no....wahhhhh! Yet another invented name. If your name is Bob, for example, and you indicated it here, do you think it would cost you your job at the stock exchange? Well, would it Bob?

I want to see attractive people! What kind of evil God wouldn't, ya know? and hey, if you're ugly , own it! it's the most artful thing you can do, and the most original..and hence, your highest physical expression. what are the alternatives? get a pair of oversized buddy holly specs and walk around with a camouflage backpack? dress like orville redenbacher and brood over some sh!tty sketches at Starbucks? Dye your hair purple and invent yet another gender? Cover yourself in tattoos? No, No,No....No! Ever notice how it's the people covered in tattoos who are generally the least interesting? they want credit for being interesting without having put in any effort...so they attempt to purchase it. my fuzzy mind is making a vague connection to prostitution.

same with the trans community. wanna hear my theory there? they just keep inventing vague, sexless genders as convenient scapegoats for their inability to get laid. it's a wonderful excuse:it's not that nobody wants to f#ck me, it's that pesky growing population of sexless eunuchs that's creating the illusion that they don't...

Nothing good ever happens from waking a sleeping demon. plus, the sequel is never as good as the original. an alchemist can turn vitriol into charm, but only if he has energy...and energy is a fickle beast, arriving and disappearing in fits and spurts. recently waking demons have very little energy...so approach at your own risk.

Satan has spoken.
L-l6tHeseDY

[Watching from Cyprus]

Satan/Marduk,

Is any of the above your real given name (if you have one) or what is your name?

My real given name for this body is Peter and if you look at my profile, the photo there is also of me.

Amazing how many people show themselves publicly via Facebook etc and same time scared of showing their true ID on forums like Avalon.. so many people always afraid.

Anyway, be good and honest .. there is no joy or happiness in being deceitful or evil.. You sound like you are fed up being stuck here! Well, if you don’t restructure this place soon you really will be completely alone.. this place of yours named after your father Ea Enki I assume, sucks.. full of “self centered wannabe Fluor and Aspartame toxicated idiot waste of spaces”.

I for one am taking the first offered lift out of here.

Time to have some fun

Love from Peter

[Mike]

Satan/Marduk,

Is any of the above your real given name (if you have one) or what is your name?

My real given name for this body is Peter and if you look at my profile, the photo there is also of me.

Amazing how many people show themselves publicly via Facebook etc and same time scared of showing their true ID on forums like Avalon.. so many people always afraid.

Anyway, be good and honest .. there is no joy or happiness in being deceitful or evil.. You sound like you are fed up being stuck here! Well, if you don’t restructure this place soon you really will be completely alone.. this place of yours named after your father Ea Enki I assume, sucks.. full of “self centered wannabe Fluor and Aspartame toxicated idiot waste of spaces”.

I for one am taking the first offered lift out of here.

Time to have some fun

Love from Peter



Peter, nice to meet you. Love to you too.

My real name could only be described as an utterance. It's a unique noise that defies spelling, sort of like a sneeze.

In a relative universe, so-called evil is necessary. So i've embraced it. I merely play my part. One day you'll thank me. You're welcome.

*takes a bow*

Don't be so anxious to leave here. The Earth is a very unique place; even in the vastness of space, there isn't another planet even remotely like it. You can't even begin to understand what that means, but it doesn't stop me from saying it.

Cut the tip of your finger, let it drip into a bowl. Add maggots. Stir briskly. Dump it over your head and say the our father backwards. Run naked thru a crowd..

.It'll get you out of work for a few weeks. You're welcome

[Watching from Cyprus]

Satan/Marduk,

Is any of the above your real given name (if you have one) or what is your name?

My real given name for this body is Peter and if you look at my profile, the photo there is also of me.

Amazing how many people show themselves publicly via Facebook etc and same time scared of showing their true ID on forums like Avalon.. so many people always afraid.

Anyway, be good and honest .. there is no joy or happiness in being deceitful or evil.. You sound like you are fed up being stuck here! Well, if you don’t restructure this place soon you really will be completely alone.. this place of yours named after your father Ea Enki I assume, sucks.. full of “self centered wannabe Fluor and Aspartame toxicated idiot waste of spaces”.

I for one am taking the first offered lift out of here.

Time to have some fun

Love from Peter



Peter, nice to meet you. Love to you too.

My real name could only be described as an utterance. It's a unique noise that defies spelling, sort of like a sneeze.

In a relative universe, so-called evil is necessary. So i've embraced it. I merely play my part. One day you'll thank me. You're welcome.

*takes a bow*

Don't be so anxious to leave here. The Earth is a very unique place; even in the vastness of space, there isn't another planet even remotely like it. You can't even begin to understand what that means, but it doesn't stop me from saying it.

Cut the tip of your finger, let it drip into a bowl. Add maggots. Stir briskly. Dump it over your head and say the our father backwards. Run naked thru a crowd..

.It'll get you out of work for a few weeks. You're welcome

Thank you for the advice. Nonsense with the Blood, Maggets LOL, but running naked through a crowd i think everyone feels like doing when they feel to limited in what is decent and what is not. A kind of a wish to break free. Names given are not who we are in the end of the day, only puts a ID on this fleshy vehicle, so my question about your real name was to ID you, which you described nicely.

I can grasp that the evil must exist for the balance some how, but here on earth, we humans, are really doing our best to imbalance the energies here, saddening the earth, its fauna, its blood (natural resources) and its other inhabitants. May i kindly ask you and i think on behalf of all unselfish loving beings on this planet, that you deceive the deceivers (maybe already your plan LOL) and once they are gone or have their souls and mind captured in a robotic entity so they can "live" forever (idiots), you can leave this place as your work is then done. Go to another planet where you can restore the balance.

Are you aware ... of course you are... stupid question .. What can you tell us about the experience of Michel Desmarquet and the planet Thiaoouba whereto he was taken?

All the best
Peter:sherlock:

[petra]

FYI, Mike has ALWAYS been very funny!

I know! :) He scared me though - for reals. Sometimes scaring people is funny.... I guess :P



It's just that he has multiple personalities, which his last post should make obvious enough.

Maybe we need to make special exceptions for schizophrenics to have two PA accounts, one for each personality. Could get kinda outa hand tho if they have three or four!

[lake]

Lake, your profile picture is gorgeous. Are you female? Do you look anything like that? I'm trying to determine whether it's worth it or not to keep pretending i'm interested in your mind. What is it with you people and your avatars and invented names? if you're physically ugly, i get it. But are you ashamed of your names as well? Christ, i feel like i'm playing make believe with a bunch of 10 yr olds. I don't know how Mike does it. Lake, imagine if you died tomorrow? We'd all be eulogizing a Warhol painting and an anonymous body of water. Just who the f#ck are you? Someone out there might want to know. It may even be important to them. I don't give a sh!t, but it may be important to somebody. Think about it.


Oh Satan....not just whimsical but also flattering! :blushing:

Although I could only blush' IF....... I wasn't a 6'5" ,110kg, ugly as sin, 53 year old ex cockney, bloke!

As you should know, I have never had social media and you will not find an image of me upon this internet and I intend to maintain that privacy! (in which case the more astute demons are probably, now, tapping your scaly shoulder and shcrilling "It lies precious one!").

Names? Well I know that you limited considerations of being have a 'real' thing about names but I do not! I recently changed the name I use in this realm (again) as I find it frees my 'mind' to understand that I am NOT that 'name'.

Really try it....Change the name you have always been known as! You will find that much of your past is remembered by you and portrayed by you.......in name only!

I was talking with your 'father' and was told to post the below....as 'daddy' worries about you....


https://i.imgur.com/8FG9bnD.png
https://i.imgur.com/K7gZeEW.png

:heart:

[onawah]

Beware, O forked tongued one!
My people are wise to your Trickster ways!
We keep close Watch on you and your Coyote cohorts and have for many moons.
We say to you: a man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.

You would be wise to take heed of the coming Blood Moon or it may make you bleed!
Your stolen virgin blood will not protect you!

As for my name, it originated in the Chippewa language and means Wide Awake. Also SheKnows.
It's pronounced Own AHHH Wah, and you would do well, O Friend of Tricksters, to OPEN WIDE when you say it, lest you swallow your own forked tongue!

You make my people laugh with your foolish imprecations, but with my drum, my rattle, my shield, in full regalia,
https://image.shutterstock.com/image-photo/indian-woman-hunter-260nw-290792549.jpg
and with my other power objects (the parrot headed umbrella which you know and fear!)
https://thumbs3.ebaystatic.com/d/l225/m/ms9AZ9YTrTlJqGlQDpNhUHQ.jpg
...I dance and make powerful medicine to keep you contained in your own dark domicile, where you cannot interfere with our poor friend Mike, who has no idea you want to take up permanent residence in his Guiness befuddled brain.

Indeed, it is only when he has had one too many that you are able to bleed through, just enough to make a sore nuisance of yourself!

If that is not enough to convince you, I will send my Dark Spirit Sister, who will sober you up in a hurry!
https://images.boredomfiles.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/5-scary-native-american-legends-664x415.jpg

As for this Bob you speak of, or for that matter, anyone who thinks the stock market is powerful medicine, we say beware of that which rises high, for when it falls, it may land right on your head!

I have spoken.






Onawah, I've been meaning to ask you about that name. It sounds like the retching noise i make while vomiting up 15 guinness...oh...no....wahhhhh! Yet another invented name. If your name is Bob, for example, and you indicated it here, do you think it would cost you your job at the stock exchange? Well, would it Bob?

[Constance]

Dear Mike, errr, Satan.

You seem to have a devilishly good sense of humour.

Will I be bored if I get into heaven?

Mark Twain seems to think so. He once said that there is no humour in heaven.

Is this true?

[Watching from Cyprus]

Mike, (not S),

Are you OK ?

I believe that a powerful being has been (hopefully no longer) in control of your body...
For 2 days I could not use my arms. I thought a heart attach was coming. Pain in both my arms as when you have a stiff neck . That pain in the shoulder joints ligaments.. terrible terrible .. fixed it with good thoughts, Lots of fresh Ginger teas and I ask “JC” to protect me.

So everyone here, take this as a warning. Don’t get into conv. with S.

I’m sure S was waiting for me to go to the hospital to be injected with a sedative so he could enter my mind.. ha no way. So stop seducing yourself even smoking grass.. clear your body and mind naturally.. cacao is good ;-)

I know now... please give us a sign that you are good.

Love you mate.
Peter

[Mike]

Dear Mike, errr, Satan.

You seem to have a devilishly good sense of humour.

Will I be bored if I get into heaven?

Mark Twain seems to think so. He once said that there is no humour in heaven.

Is this true?



There's no humor in Twain. He got into heaven but only spent a brief few days there. No one had anything good to say about him. Even Saint Michael was reported to have been caught whispering, Jesus Christ, get that ****ing curmudgeon out of here. These days his spirit roams the earth, where it's doomed to watch sleeping high schoolers drool onto page 3 of "Huck Finn" into eternity.

Hey what is that in your hand? Why are you displaying that meaningless wood shaving? Is that supposed to be an offering? Sigh, whatever happened to bloody phlegm and cow fetus'?

[Constance]

Hey what is that in your hand? Why are you displaying that meaningless wood shaving? Is that supposed to be an offering? Sigh, whatever happened to bloody phlegm and cow fetus'?

That dearest Satan, is what is commonly known as a leaf but I do understand how you could mistake it for a wood shaving because it is curled and dry looking.
I'm sure you know a lot about wood shavings; I'm now thinking of those hellish barbed wooden spears you created.

I think we left bloody phlegm and cow fetus' back in the dark ages. At least, that is what I hear? Any updates on that?

Now be a good Satan and run along and check on the new entrants to hell will ya?

[onawah]

Hmmm.... I am getting the feeling that old BEELZEBUB is taking stock of his current, precarious situation, since he has been taking his time responding to this post:
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105444-I-Am-The-TRUE-Satan-Any-Questions--An-Interview-With-Satan-&p=1270303&viewfull=1#post1270303

And may (rightly --face it, it's inevitable--) suspect he is going now from this:
https://www.bleedingcool.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/devil-600x552.jpg

to this:
https://mysteryoftheinquity.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/satan23.png

...Although of course he is going to try to put as glamorously tragic a spin on it as he can muster.

[Mike]

Hmmm.... I am getting the feeling that old BEELZEBUB is taking stock of his current, precarious situation, since he has been taking his time responding to this post:
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105444-I-Am-The-TRUE-Satan-Any-Questions--An-Interview-With-Satan-&p=1270303&viewfull=1#post1270303

And may (rightly --face it, it's inevitable--) suspect he is going now from this:
https://www.bleedingcool.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/devil-600x552.jpg

to this:
https://mysteryoftheinquity.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/satan23.png

...Although of course he is going to try to put as glamorously tragic a spin on it as he can muster.



Big man, walking in the park..

Wig-wam, frightened of the dark..

Some kind of solitude is measured out in you..

you think you know me but you haven't go a clue..

if you're lonely you can talk to me

[Mike]

Hey what is that in your hand? Why are you displaying that meaningless wood shaving? Is that supposed to be an offering? Sigh, whatever happened to bloody phlegm and cow fetus'?

That dearest Satan, is what is commonly known as a leaf but I do understand how you could mistake it for a wood shaving because it is curled and dry looking.
I'm sure you know a lot about wood shavings; I'm now thinking of those hellish barbed wooden spears you created.

I think we left bloody phlegm and cow fetus' back in the dark ages. At least, that is what I hear? Any updates on that?

Now be a good Satan and run along and check on the new entrants to hell will ya?



never use semi colons.

they are transvestite hermaphrodites representing only nothing. all they do is show you've been to college.

[onawah]

Uhoh :(:behindsofa:
https://i.chzbgr.com/full/1910382848/h519BC8E1/
Hit a raw nerve?
Maybe this will pick your Satanic spirits back up...:
https://pics.ballmemes.com/bperation-during-the-investi-gation-the-source-said-afp-tules-37257068.png

Hey Bulldog
Song by The Beatles
Lyrics
Sheepdog, standing in the rain
Bullfrog, doing it again
Some kind of happiness is
Measured out in miles
What makes you think you're
Something special when you smile
Childlike no one understands
Jackknife in your sweaty hands
Some kind of innocence is
Measured out in years
You don't know what it's like
To listen to your fears
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
If you're lonely, you can talk to me
Big man (yeah) walking in the park
Wigwam frightened of the dark
Some kind of solitude is
Measured out in you
You think you know me, but you haven't got a clue
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
You can talk to me
If you're lonely, you can talk to me
Hey hey
Roar
Hey, bulldog (hey bulldog)
Woof
Hey, bulldog
Hey, bulldog
Hey, bulldog
Hey man
Whats up brother?
Roof
What do ya say
I say, roof
You know any more?
Ah ah (you got it, that's it, you had it)
That's it man, wo ho, that's it, you got it
Woah
Look at me man, I only had ten children
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ha ha ha ha
Quiet, quiet (ok)
Quiet
Hey, bulldog, hey bulldog"
Songwriters: John Lennon / Paul Mccartney
Hey Bulldog lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Not sure who exactly I am talking to now, but there's a nice post on another thread that Mike started here: http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105615-Your-Soul-s-Pre-Birth-Plan&p=1272106&viewfull=1#post1272106
...which might help soothe raw nerves. :heart:

[Mike]

i just happened to be listening to that song as i was reading your post...so i plagarized it. i enjoyed watching you trying to determine what i meant by it..but i meant nothing, of course. quoting the song made me feel mysterious and enigmatic, which gave me a raging astral boner.

let me ask you a question: if a stranger were to offer you pasta salad off a fork they had just eaten off of, would you take it?

also: do you think "helter skelter" is a precursor to modern day heavy metal?
vWW2SzoAXMo

[onawah]

The odd thing is, this morning when I woke up it was too cold to get out of bed so I started a new book, Her Fearful Symmetry and this is on the dedication page:
" She said, I know what it's like to be dead. I know what it's like to be sad. And she's making me feel like I've never been born." The Beatles

She said
I know what it's like to be dead
I know what it is to be sad
And she's making me feel like I've never been born
I said
Who put all those things in your hair
Things that make me feel like I'm sad
And you're making me feel like I've never been born
She said you don't understand what I said
I said no no no you're wrong
When I was a boy, everything was right
Everything was right
I said
Even though you know what you know
I know that I'm ready to leave
'Cause you're making me feel like I've never been born
She said you don't understand what I said
I said no no no you're wrong
When I was a boy, everything was right
Everything was right
I said
Even though you know what you know
I know that I'm ready to leave
'Cause you're making me feel like I've never been born
She said
I know what it's like to be dead
I know what it's like to be dead
I know what it is to be sad
I know what it is to be sad
Songwriters: John Lennon / Paul McCartney

Strange...
But far from arousing me, it made me want to roll over and go back to sleep.

The answer to your questions of course is: "AS IF!!!"

https://www.corebrainjournal.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/DID-Dissociative-Identify-1-1024x480.png

"Dissociative identity disorder, formerly referred to as multiple personality disorder, is a condition wherein a person's identity is fragmented into two or more distinct personality states."

I think it might be helpful for you to mull that over for awhile...

[onawah]

It occurs to me that you have been taking OBE lessons from that batty bad boy Brit friend of yours.
Hmmphhh!!
That would be typical of the two of you, voyeuristically carousing around on the astral.
No matter. I have my spirit catcher on the ready to catch you in the act!
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/5a/15/8d/5a158d3d112a757ba0a64da592a58baa.gif
That would be most amusing!
Though no doubt you would not agree...
http://www.heycomputer.com/ref/legend/dark2.jpg





i just happened to be listening to that song as i was reading your post...so i plagarized it. i enjoyed watching you trying to determine what i meant by it..but i meant nothing, of course. quoting the song made me feel mysterious and enigmatic, which gave me a raging astral boner.

let me ask you a question: if a stranger were to offer you pasta salad off a fork they had just eaten off of, would you take it?

also: do you think "helter skelter" is a precursor to modern day heavy metal?
vWW2SzoAXMo

[onawah]

It would go something like this:
_doW-OKCAyo


It occurs to me that you have been taking OBE lessons from that batty bad boy Brit friend of yours.
Hmmphhh!!
That would be typical of the two of you, voyeuristically carousing around on the astral.

[Mike]

Why would i need lessons from a mortal? About anything? I think I'm actually offended (...so that's what that feels like).

But you may be slightly psychic. That bombastic bisexual brit brigadier of bedevilment (Satan can out alliterate anyone...tho i suspect said Brit might wanly and unconvincingly dispute the bisexual allegation) talked my vehicle into purchasing this movie not too long ago, even attaching the "must see" label. Now Mike isn't the brightest bulb..he has a few of you fooled but he's actually quite thick. Wit does not equal intelligence; in fact, it's often a creative way of hiding an intelligence deficiency. Don't tell him I told you so.

So he ordered the movie and waited weeks, never once wondering why..despite his Amazon prime status and common sense. It finally arrived and he promptly put it in the dvd player, only to be informed that, this disk will not function on american devices. we, the former world conquerors now occupying about 50 square feet of land have decided, out of spite, to not make our technology compatible with american technology. so put that in your empty budweiser cans, cut a hole in the top, and smoke it (while listening to Aerosmith) ...paraphrase.

Mike ordered the dvd from England, stupidly but mistakenly. it won't work in an american dvd player.

[onawah]

Well, that figures and about what I would expect.
After all, when two lunatics put their heads together, what could possibly materialize but more lunacy?

( Such as--I think you will see the similarities--
https://fourthage.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/killing-joke-asylum.png?w=640 )

I will PM Mike and advise him to get it from Netflix.
He can always unsubscribe afterwards if there's nothing else he wants from that venue.
And if he wants to keep it, he only has to pay a nominal fee.
Or watch it online if he doesn't mind risking getting a virus.

I will advise him to watch it sober, so you won't be able to spy.
The plot is too fine an example of what misfortunes to the human race your brand of mischief produces, and it would most certainly go to your head.
Which is already fat enough.

While for him, it could be a life-changing experience.
(Many of higher IQ than he have become life-long cult fanatics.)
And if you have been taking up residence in his head, God only knows, he must need one!


Why would i need lessons from a mortal? About anything? I think I'm actually offended (...so that's what that feels like).

But you may be slightly psychic. That bombastic bisexual brit brigadier of bedevilment (Satan can out alliterate anyone...tho i suspect said Brit might wanly and unconvincingly dispute the bisexual allegation) talked my vehicle into purchasing this movie not too long ago, even attaching the "must see" label. Now Mike isn't the brightest bulb..he has a few of you fooled but he's actually quite thick. Wit does not equal intelligence; in fact, it's often a creative way of hiding an intelligence deficiency. Don't tell him I told you so.

So he ordered the movie and waited weeks, never once wondering why..despite his Amazon prime status and common sense. It finally arrived and he promptly put it in the dvd player, only to be informed that, this disk will not function on american devices. we, the former world conquerors now occupying about 50 square feet of land have decided, out of spite, to not make our technology compatible with american technology. so put that in your empty budweiser cans, cut a hole in the top, and smoke it (while listening to Aerosmith) ...paraphrase.

Mike ordered the dvd from England, stupidly but mistakenly. it won't work in an american dvd player.

[onawah]

Perhaps an explanation is in order.
The other party mentioned in recent posts, the "bombastic bisexual brit brigadier of bedevilment", "batty bad boy Brit"--is actually a former member of Avalon who got kicked off the forum for ...bad behavior... whose forum name was Borden.
Borden used to post on an old thread, "Welcome to the Pub at the End of the Universe".
The person who started that thread, SongsfortheOtherKind, left Avalon and started a forum of her own, which quite a few Avalonians also joined, including Mike, Borden and myself.

Somewhere along the way, Mike and Borden were assigned alternate identities of the superheroes, Captain America and Batman, respectively.
I should clarify that--Borden assigned himself the role of Batman; and he persuaded Mike to take on the Captain America persona.
Mike was reluctant to do that--he wanted to be Magneto, the bad superhero from XMen, which appealed to his fantasies about himself as being a dark, sexy anti-hero.
But he acquiesced, and as much as Mike might protest, I think Borden kind of had him pegged.

I foresaw that no ordinary super-heroine was going to be able to cope with these guys, so I assigned myself the role of Mary Poppins.
(As it happened, I used to work as nanny to 2 young English girls, and after I read all the old pre-Disney Mary Poppins books to them, they decided I was the REAL Mary Poppins.
The REAL Mary Poppins was nothing like the squeaky clean Disney version, and we much preferred the former, who was much more mysterious and quirky).

Anyway, an all-out ongoing virtual battle of wits of alternate superhero personas started online,
It was great fun for awhile.
So for Mike, slipping into an alternate role comes fairly naturally.
As for Mary Poppins, coming up against Satan is certainly no big deal.
She reduced Batman to a mere shadow of his former self on a regular basis.
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a7/23/cb/a723cbd19bc8f2829f521f6cb431474a.jpg

[bogdan9310]

Go to Hell. :highfive:

[onawah]

Is Satan dead?
This thread has certainly been quiet as the grave.
Is anyone DOWN there?
(Perhaps Satan just doesn't want to hear anymore from the less-than-worshipful crowd here on Avalon...
Possibly His Satanic Majesty's ego can only take so much bruising before he becomes histrionic. )

https://table9mutant.files.wordpress.com/2015/10/img_3616.jpg

[Constance]

Will the real Satan please stand up? :p

91DSNL1BEeY

[Denise/Dizi]

Will the real Satan please stand up? :p

91DSNL1BEeY

OMG that was hysterical.

[Mike]

Go to Hell. :highfive:


that wasn't even remotely clever. and yet you seem so pleased with yourself.

this is a great mystery.

Satan has awoken. it may be for only a minute. maybe a day. maybe 2. all depends on my tolerance for stupidity.

right, someone say something interesting..and quick. i'm already bored with you idiots.

[Denise/Dizi]

Do we get to pick out our own characters?

[Mike]

Do we get to pick out our own characters?


something interesting, i said.

try again.

[Valerie Villars]

Satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Where the hell have you been?

Somehow we have crossed paths without seeing each other.

[Mike]

this human makes me smile:

3ilmOZvpOa8

[onawah]

Merry Christmas, Satan; here's a card just for you....:waving: :evil:
:angel:

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/43/c0/54/43c0544bff06b3e4997191a56f0f79ac.jpg

[Mike]

You have to understand, I'm drowning in infinity...over time my ability to think up something random just vanishes in the face of it. I lose the ability to create. I can only react to what I'm given, and then I do my best to digest it and burp it back into your faces with 1000 times the brilliance. Just by providing me with a point of relativity, you awaken me. But most of you have disgraced yourselves with your offerings. If I'm summoned, I'm obliged to arrive. But if you're going to yank me out of eternity, at least give me something to work with, would you?

I just reread this thread and I've never felt more alone. I've never felt more convinced of my brilliance, on the one hand, but I've never felt more isolated as a result of it. In 3d, I'm trapped by your lack of imagination. I can only build upon the energy offered, and this place has all the energy of a nursing home. Satan needs dance partners, so if you want to stimulate me you must dance.

I liked you people better when you had hope. Squelching it was downright orgasmic. Now you're all as depressed and flat as I am. There's nothing left to ruin when everything is already ruined.

I have to break eternity up into manageable pieces just to stay sane. Here you have a built in firewall...spiritual amnesia if you will...to protect you against the curse of infinity. You curse your limitation but you have no idea what it's providing you. You should be celebrating it daily with orgies in the streets!! But instead you complain and whine and invent stories about alien soul sucking machines on the moon limiting your spiritual potential. When your potential is endless you must limit it to create the illusion of progress. You've limited it yourselves. So stop whining.

Re Krampus: krampus' are regarded down here with an admixture of pity and disdain. They're gutter dwellers, and don't share our ethics. It would be confusing for you to comprehend our attitude towards them, which is much like an incarcerated killer's attitude towards a child molester or rapist.

Thank you for the card Onawah. You're a sweetheart. Do you have a f#cking question?

[onawah]

As a matter of fact, I do have a question, though it's coming from a good friend of mine:
https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1415265812l/23507961.jpg

But don't think that calling me a sweetheart is going to make the question any less tart.
When are you going to move your head quarters out of Mike's head?
Forty two is much too young to be a curmudgeon, but that is the effect you appear to intend having on him.
I can understand why you might find the head of a pitifully bored, weary, toxic, jaded old dipsomaniac misogynist like Bukowski to be suitable lodging for your misguided mission.
He was too stewed and stoned most of the time to notice or care very much.
Mike however, isn't nearly far enough down a road like that to compare to that sort of lost cause.
I'm sure he still finds joy and purpose and more of interest and worthy of admiration in life than his own turds!

Drowning in BS is more like it...
But have a Merry Xmas anyway, you old reprobate.
:p
https://image.spreadshirtmedia.com/image-server/v1/mp/compositions/T669A2MPA1393PT17X50Y58D1017039239FS2900/views/2,width=550,height=550,appearanceId=2,backgroundColor=000000,noPt=true,version=1550271574/not-today-satan-its-christmas-santa-claus-unisex-fleece-zip-hoodie.jpg

[onawah]

Somebody had to share this video that Dedukshyn posted on Mike's other thread, "Re: Cringeworthy Christmas emails/letters":

fmqVGbaMxHY

Awwww... poor Satan!! ;) That must have felt like being cursed by Greta Thunberg! :o :facepalm::raining::sad::frusty::mad2:

[Bill Ryan]

:bump: :)

[Mike]

Joe Biden? Joe Biden is gonna win the election? Have I got this right? 'Ol Pedo Joe? Didn't you see the creepy way he caressed that young girl and whispered into her ear? Even I winced when I saw that. What the hell is wrong with you people?

But hey, look, I've got my own problems down here. I recently referred to Baphomet as a "she" but apparently "they" is non-binary now. Now I've got some weird looking kids picketing outside my place as we speak, cursing my male privilege while waving angry signs with crossed out dicks on them. They're threatening to cancel me. What the f#ck does that mean?

[Constance]

ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[Mike]

Joe Biden? Joe Biden is gonna win the election? Have I got this right? 'Ol Pedo Joe? Didn't you see the creepy way he caressed that young girl and whispered into her ear? Even I winced when I saw that. What the hell is wrong with you people?

But hey, look, I've got my own problems down here. I recently referred to Baphomet as a "she" but apparently "they" is non-binary now. Now I've got some weird looking kids picketing outside my place as we speak, cursing my male privilege while waving angry signs with crossed out dicks on them. They're threatening to cancel me. What the f#ck does that mean?

You think you've got problems Satan...

44971


Dear Insufferable C*nt,

having just viewed your picture, i can assure you no is or ever will ogle you for as long as you live. Please stop speaking as a sign of respect and support for humanity.

Yours up to the teeth,
Satan

[Anka]

Satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Where the hell have you been?

Somehow we have crossed paths without seeing each other.

:)

Hei Luci fer!
Do you have Shoulder Angels?

Shoulder Angels(1:06)

bJzewiMrQ-0

[ExomatrixTV]

So if "Satan/Lucifer" and 1/3 of the Heavens were casted in to the Earth because of a "War in the Heavens" which is a paradox because it suppose to be "perfect place" why cast them to Earth why not Pluto or any other (exo)planet? ... is The Universe/Multiverse not big enough?

If I knew in advance there are pedophile teachers at a school why would I send my children to a place where the chance of terrible things happening is high? Same for Humans (Gods children) being mixed with Fallen Angels & Demons who were ORIGINALLY created in "The Heavens" (by WHO exactly?) but casted out to Earth of all places. Why? ... Is the Universe not big enough for them to be some place else?

Sincere question.

...or are we all "Fallen Ones" with amnesia ... and being send to this Earth 3D Prison to be spiritually tested.

Latin (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin):

Lucifer = "Bringer/Bearer of (False?) Light"
Satan = Rebellion to God

What if that "God" is NOT The Real Prime Creator (beyond any man-made or alien-made Religion) but just another Alien Race that needs (conditional) worship of a different kind?

Any being that needs worship is already a big red flag for me same for Satan same "need for worship" paradox.

He or She that needs power over others, in my view, makes a clear statement, that you do not have it ... those who can empower themselves first WITHOUT being a parasite without the need to be worshiped is far more closer to the original concept of being in connection with Source than anything else posing as a "savior".

cheers,
John Kuhles
November 6th, 2020

[Strat]

Joe Biden? Joe Biden is gonna win the election? Have I got this right? 'Ol Pedo Joe? Didn't you see the creepy way he caressed that young girl and whispered into her ear? Even I winced when I saw that. What the hell is wrong with you people?

But hey, look, I've got my own problems down here. I recently referred to Baphomet as a "she" but apparently "they" is non-binary now. Now I've got some weird looking kids picketing outside my place as we speak, cursing my male privilege while waving angry signs with crossed out dicks on them. They're threatening to cancel me. What the f#ck does that mean?

You think you've got problems Satan...

44971

I read online that Corey Hart is one of Satan's court jesters. This is why he made such a catchy song influencing people to wear sunglasses at night. She may be on to something. Step 1 was sunglasses, step 2 facemasks. Look out ladies, sinister looks are coming your way.

[Mike]

Joe Biden? Joe Biden is gonna win the election? Have I got this right? 'Ol Pedo Joe? Didn't you see the creepy way he caressed that young girl and whispered into her ear? Even I winced when I saw that. What the hell is wrong with you people?

But hey, look, I've got my own problems down here. I recently referred to Baphomet as a "she" but apparently "they" is non-binary now. Now I've got some weird looking kids picketing outside my place as we speak, cursing my male privilege while waving angry signs with crossed out dicks on them. They're threatening to cancel me. What the f#ck does that mean?

You think you've got problems Satan...

44971

I read online that Corey Hart is one of Satan's court jesters. This is why he made such a catchy song influencing people to wear sunglasses at night. She may be on to something. Step 1 was sunglasses, step 2 facemasks. Look out ladies, sinister looks are coming your way.



He also wrote "never surrender" which, thru the eyes of the hyper-twat'ish, just might be viewed as an ode to toxic masculinity. But until i see him in a gillette commercial shaving his armpits while having a good cry to "the notebook", I'll assume his song is what it seems to be about, which is likely something to do with Sylvester Stallone rekindling his relationship with his son whilst simultaneously trying to remain employed as a truck driver..all while training to be a national arm wrestling champion

[Mike]

So if "Satan/Lucifer" and 1/3 of the Heavens were casted in to the Earth because of a "War in the Heavens" which is a paradox because it suppose to be "perfect place" why cast them to Earth why not Pluto or any other (exo)planet? ... is The Universe/Multiverse not big enough?

If I knew in advance there are pedophile teachers at a school why would I send my children to a place where the chance of terrible things happening is high? Same for Humans (Gods children) being mixed with Fallen Angels & Demons who were ORIGINALLY created in "The Heavens" (by WHO exactly?) but casted out to Earth of all places. Why? ... Is the Universe not big enough for them to be some place else?

Sincere question.

...or are we all "Fallen Ones" with amnesia ... and being send to this Earth 3D Prison to be spiritually tested.

Latin (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin):

Lucifer = "Bringer/Bearer of (False?) Light"
Satan = Rebellion to God

What if that "God" is NOT The Real Prime Creator (beyond any man-made or alien-made Religion) but just another Alien Race that needs (conditional) worship of a different kind?

Any being that needs worship is already a big red flag for me same for Satan same "need for worship" paradox.

He or She that needs power over others, in my view, makes a clear statement, that you do not have it ... those who can empower themselves first WITHOUT being a parasite without the need to be worshiped is far more closer to the original concept of being in connection with Source than anything else posing as a "savior".

cheers,
John Kuhles
November 6th, 2020


it's not a paradox. they came here precisely because it was a perfect place. what these demons like to do is find something good and right and then arbitrarily eliminate it. Pluto is f#cking cold man. And totally desolate. What could we possibly destroy there that might make us feel diabolically sinful? Come on, what's the matter with you? All the action is here, on the earth!

Your God put you in a place that he regards as perfectly safe. And from where he's sitting, it is. From where you're sitting, it isn't. Do you trust him?
7P--C-t60lI

[DeDukshyn]

Joe Biden? Joe Biden is gonna win the election? Have I got this right? 'Ol Pedo Joe? Didn't you see the creepy way he caressed that young girl and whispered into her ear? Even I winced when I saw that. What the hell is wrong with you people?

But hey, look, I've got my own problems down here. I recently referred to Baphomet as a "she" but apparently "they" is non-binary now. Now I've got some weird looking kids picketing outside my place as we speak, cursing my male privilege while waving angry signs with crossed out dicks on them. They're threatening to cancel me. What the f#ck does that mean?

You think you've got problems Satan...

44971


Dear Insufferable C*nt,

having just viewed your picture, i can assure you no is or ever will ogle you for as long as you live. Please stop speaking as a sign of respect and support for humanity.

Yours up to the teeth,
Satan

Literally had to wipe spit out beer off my monitor ... thanks a lot, you red skinned bastard if evil.

[ExomatrixTV]

Your God put you in a place that he regards as perfectly safe. And from where he's sitting, it is. From where you're sitting, it isn't. Do you trust him?

In my view, "God" is just a label we use for our limited comprehension and is connected to (narrow) human agendas how to interpreted "His" word.

I prefer "Prime Creator" ... because it is NOT attached to any (limited) human agendas of (thought) control. My question to the Prime Creator is: "If all comes from you (Prime Creator) then anything of it is form it like sparks of a fire. ... So there is NO "outside" the Prime Creator ... thus we are all talking to ourselves now?

Maybe forgetting that we all came from the same Source is part of the deal ... so that we have unlimited distractions into infinity for entertainment purposes.

What if ANY "beLIEve (https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?112727-Skeptics-of-Avalon-Why-are-you-here&p=1386181#post1386181) System" is a temporary "role play" to experience that aspect of it until we have learned enough from it and move on to the next level of "beLIEve (https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?112727-Skeptics-of-Avalon-Why-are-you-here&p=1386181#post1386181) System" and on and on and on in to infinity.

I am the other you, the future & history.

Source (https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?112785-If-you-could-ask-God-a-question...&p=1387129&viewfull=1#post1387129)

ps: I did/do not have the assumption that "satan" (just a label) would comprehend what I am doing ... because it is beyond duality thinking.

He does not even see I was challenging "the logic" of everything not the "satan" concept alone.

Any story (for or against) that is told is about framing things a certain way ... mostly (if not all) to just serve own agenda or the assumed "higher good" especially "the end justifies the means" type stories.

... and me addressing a paradox was not about satan but everything ... assuming satan is the ultimate narcissist (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/narcissism) that can not see beyond his role-play trapped in his "story line" which I already explained, but failed to notice it ... I forgive his short-comings ;) must be harrowing if it is eternal.

cheers,
John Kuhles
November 6, 2020

lQnfFJMwsCo
x9sqkahSziU
Captain Kirk (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_T._Kirk) and his crew must deal with Mr. Spock (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spock)'s long-lost half-brother who hijacks the Enterprise (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starship_Enterprise) for an obsessive search for "God" at the center of the galaxy.


more info (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098382/)

[Bill Ryan]

Go on, admit it — what influence did you have on the US election last week? :)

[AriG]

Go on, admit it — what influence did you have on the US election last week? :)

Last week? Not sure when your week begins, but for Anglo saxons , and understood you to be one, it’s Sunday.....so totally devastating, this outcome, we need a revolution to offset the “reset”. Snowflakes need to earn their place, not have it handed to them.

[Hermoor]

When are you and God just gonna knock it off, eh?

Like a pair of errant school kids the both of you!

[Sophocles]

Why the hell?

[Mike]

Go on, admit it — what influence did you have on the US election last week? :)

Who? What? Me?:)



Why the hell?

Why not the hell?

[onawah]

Hey Satan,
Once in awhile, at least, I think almost everyone has a day like this, seemingly for no particular reason:

d-diB65scQU

My questions are: are you and/or your minions taking a vacation at those times?

https://cdna.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/030/488/100/large/katerina-rychkova-.jpg?1600766899
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/52/16/13/52161343956959671e62eb283589e3b4.jpg
https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/61wd4dbSlKL._SX342_QL70_ML2_.jpg

And do you ever have a day like that, or are you always miserable?
(Psychology says that psychopaths can actually experience happiness, though rarely and very minimally, so you may not actually know what that feeling is, but perhaps you have a memory of it, from before your fall from Heaven? )

[Ewan]

My most inconsequential Abaddon, aka Serpent of Old,

I had no idea you were rambling away in here, you have become so insignificant I literally never noticed until now. How's life been treating you in the bottomless pit.

Why would anyone bother to ask you anything when everyone must know you lie through your fangs. Its like breathing to you. Does the lure, the false promise, of power really hold sway over anyone these days. Yeah, who am I kidding, of course it does. They always come to regret it though, don't they. You were right about that I guess, human capacity for stupid thinking can be next level sometimes.

I'll confess I've brushed shoulders with you in the past, temptations falling my way, the partaking of which always left me filling ill. Doesn't take many encounters like that to leave you thinking '*uck that *hit'. Not a plan with any longevity really, and after the long march of time you couldn't come up with something new? Kind of renders you ultimately powerless. You will most likely bluster that it couldn't have been you I encountered, just some minor imp of no importance, your tendency for self-aggrandizement without bounds would never allow you to concede your ultimate impotence.

Incidentally is that bloke still in containment in electro-magnetic fields under CERN, the one they think is you? That would be funny in a tragic sort of way, in the same way your entire existence was a mistake.

Most people know you today as a dim and distant memory that looked something like this.

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/00/0f/ef/000fef88c7cae9503c2199c532dc90e3.jpg

If they're aware of you at all!

Anything that appeared to be a question in this post was merely rhetorical, I know how you love to argue in an attempt to protect that ego of yours.

--------------------------------------------------

(Aside to Mike, there's no lasting damage from such a possession, never fear.)

Edit: Missed a comma, scared to use a semi-colon.

[Bill Ryan]

Edit: Missed a comma, scared to use a semi-colon.Good call. :thumbsup: Using semi-colons in a message to Satan is sure to end badly!

[Mike]

Onawah, I am most "happy" when I am most hated. So, ironically, most of you fuel me with the very emotion you've been trained all along to aim at me.

"Happy" is inaccurate, but we are so limited by words here when discussing something like me. A level of poetry is almost required, and my vehicle isn't up to it at the moment..the slug. Happiness, as you understand it, makes me sick to my stomach. I merely chase thrills that will likely end in sadistic fulfillment...like making a good man cheat on the love of his life with her best friend 2 days before the wedding. Sh!t like that.

The issue with the world today is that the insane are now rivaling the sane. The insane love me, even though they don't really know it's me they're loving (maybe i'll explain this later), and I hate that they love me. To exist in the form I've grown accommodated to, I need hate. Hate, hate, hate.

See when I began confusing your population over sex and gender and so forth, I didn't expect you all to start slicing off your genitals so quickly. I was disappointed that it all happened so fast. I exist in eternity, you see...and entertainment must be drawn out and sucked of all it's nectar. I can only maintain my form while I'm moving and doing, and if I run out of ideas I cease to be.

So...my next trick was to actually make people defend their right to slice off their genitals. That has happened way too quickly as well. So, out of ideas and with my existence in the balance, I made sure Biden got elected. Sorry! But it was the only way I could ensure entertainment for the next 4 years.

Ive found myself in a catch 22 now - I must create stunts that keep me entertained and allow for my form to maintain it's integrity, but those very stunts are causing large numbers of people to love me, unknowingly, which I hate.

God and Satan have been inverted, you see. Good and evil have been inverted. It was my trick, but I never imagined it would work so well. Karma's a b1tch, as they say

[Mike]

Ewan, what kind of name is that? You sound like the jedi that never made it...the one that tripped and fell over r2d2 and landed in Leia's t!ts during an important ceremony, and was subsequently reduced to being one of those homogenous, orange suit wearing nobodies that dies in a suicidal mission to kill a deathstar.

Yes we've met. I don't appreciate your attitude or your rhetorical questions. but you're right about my ego. touche

[Ewan]

What kind of response is that to the great insult I offered your personage, are you getting mellow in your antiquity? Where's the fire and brimstone? (Please don't show me that! Rather like a firework show these days.)

I'll have you know the incident with (Princess) Leia's endowments was organised for political reasons of which I was entirely unaware. R2D2 had been programmed, maliciously I might add, to enable that trip at the most opportune moment. If you play back the akashic records at just the right speed you will see this for yourself, along with several satisfied smirks among certain onlookers among the assembled patronage. Onlookers who were no doubt enthralled by you in the first place, a matter you choose to ignore in your rush to denigrate. (Inidentally, Leia told me later she was secretly amused by it and was not in the slightest offended. There was even a brief tryst).

That particular incarnation was one of my most important in hindsight, it taught me not to place too much trust in ceremony and to disregard the majority of media reports as agenda driven. However, as you well know, valuable lessons are never lost and despite the embarrasment at the time it formed a stronger grounding for my next life.

How does that sit with you by the way, the fact we get life after life to learn whilst you apparently stagnate? You must have noticed certain beings become harder and harder to influence over time until you can't touch them at all. Does it rankle?

[Constance]

[ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[onawah]

Satan, it appears you yourself have revealed the means to your own demise, and the solution to the contradictions in your "nature" if it can be so termed (you being so utterly UNnatural).
Of course you hate being loved!
It's so simple, I'm surprised it's not become common knowledge by now.
The more people succumb to the supreme boredom they must be suffering from to resort to taking allegiance with Satanism, the weaker you become.
And judging from the state of the world at this juncture, you must be nearly on your knees by now ( which will actually be quite nice to see).

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/516x48yvadL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

You wrote: "I exist in eternity, you see...and entertainment must be drawn out and sucked of all it's nectar. "
(Then Hollywood must not be a source of entertainment for you anymore, as Satanic as it's become...
Or the mainstream media, almost as full of lies as the Father of Lies himself.
Though of course, you have other sources, as yet. )

Still, since: "I can only maintain my form while I'm moving and doing, and if I run out of ideas I cease to be."
Herein lies the contradiction and the solution: you cannot both exist in eternity and yet cease to be if you run out of ideas.
Therefore, the more gratified you become, the closer you've come to your demise.
SO you are not immortal at all and certainly not invincible...

So I would suggest you vacate poor Mike asap (who, if he has become sluggish, has only you to blame).
https://scontent-dfw5-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/120491211_110145030852136_1450315448611780133_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&ccb=2&_nc_sid=85a577&_nc_ohc=dom6N6VqEckAX-7pWMe&_nc_ht=scontent-dfw5-2.xx&oh=869974ae099fe7126b087115322ce2fb&oe=5FCD6A5B
(Here he is out trick-or-treating, poor thing...:( )
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/57/0f/df/570fdfb5481a5074b14af0b35dc0a585.jpg
I suggest instead that you go and find some Biden fans to inhabit--they are numerous, exceptionally gullible and too confused to know whom or what they really hate or love, and will soon be rioting in the streets if Trump wins out after all, which should keep you entertained for awhile, at least.
https://www.wwnytv.com/resizer/RK8V0azoIsiZKwB1tJu0hd1qh7A=/1200x600/cloudfront-us-east-1.images.arcpublishing.com/raycom/4XWURRP5DRBVTDR26SAHIMMRRE.jpg
In any case it's clear that your days are numbered.
https://www.dbta.com/Images/Default.aspx?ImageID=18535&max=468&maxWidth=250&canvas=468x250





Onawah, I am most "happy" when I am most hated. So, ironically, most of you fuel me with the very emotion you've been trained all along to aim at me.

"Happy" is inaccurate, but we are so limited by words here when discussing something like me. A level of poetry is almost required, and my vehicle isn't up to it at the moment..the slug. Happiness, as you understand it, makes me sick to my stomach. I merely chase thrills that will likely end in sadistic fulfillment...like making a good man cheat on the love of his life with her best friend 2 days before the wedding. Sh!t like that.

The issue with the world today is that the insane are now rivaling the sane. The insane love me, even though they don't really know it's me they're loving (maybe i'll explain this later), and I hate that they love me. To exist in the form I've grown accommodated to, I need hate. Hate, hate, hate.

See when I began confusing your population over sex and gender and so forth, I didn't expect you all to start slicing off your genitals so quickly. I was disappointed that it all happened so fast. I exist in eternity, you see...and entertainment must be drawn out and sucked of all it's nectar. I can only maintain my form while I'm moving and doing, and if I run out of ideas I cease to be.

So...my next trick was to actually make people defend their right to slice off their genitals. That has happened way too quickly as well. So, out of ideas and with my existence in the balance, I made sure Biden got elected. Sorry! But it was the only way I could ensure entertainment for the next 4 years.

Ive found myself in a catch 22 now - I must create stunts that keep me entertained and allow for my form to maintain it's integrity, but those very stunts are causing large numbers of people to love me, unknowingly, which I hate.

God and Satan have been inverted, you see. Good and evil have been inverted. It was my trick, but I never imagined it would work so well. Karma's a b1tch, as they say

[RunningDeer]

Edit: Missed a comma, scared to use a semi-colon.Good call. :thumbsup: Using semi-colons in a message to Satan is sure to end badly!

I can confirm that :bigsmile:






never use semi colons.

they are transvestite hermaphrodites representing only nothing. all they do is show you've been to college.

I remember that post. (http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/grrrrr.gif)

In 8th grade Language Arts class, we learned about colons, semi-colons and reviewed diagrams and Venn diagrams. Diagrams were taught at 5th & 6th grade levels. So no, it’s not college level stuff. It was basic LA curriculum in elementary, middle school and junior high.


http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/Notices/diagram.jpg

While I’m at it, we were also taught to use capitals letters when we begin sentences.

One last pet peeve, Mr. Satan, most know to capitalize ‘I’ when speaking about themselves. In some circles, such as hand writing analysis, the graphologist makes note of the lower case ‘i'. It may indicate how the writer feels about him/herself. Attention to detail is important or at least it was in the 20th century.

Fingers crossed there are no misspelled words or grammar errors or I’ll be joining you in heLL-o. Thanks to everyone that has the grace to let it go when I mess up on spelling and grammar.

* Hope that wasn’t too harsh, Mr. Satan. http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/flirty-hearts.gif

http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/drink-slides.gif

♡

[Baby Steps]

Good morning - love your work

I see that many Christians have cognitive dissonance when asked ‘ if God is all powerful does his lack of action against you mean he endorses you?’

I mean maybe this war between good and evil is fake , you are a manufactured fake enemy like Osama Bin Laden ? Do you think that the arrival of the Aquarian age and the kingdom of God on earth will include the illegal extra judicial killing of a body double and the fake news declaring the end of all evil?

[ExomatrixTV]

@Mike (http://projectavalon.net/forum4/member.php?3356-Mike) what is your take on this movie?

Devil's Advocate (1997) Official Trailer - Al Pacino, Keanu Reeves Drama Movie HD
40hHA9n4C2o
10 Things You Didn't know About DevilsAdvocate:
XFq1un-CVto
Box Office:

Budget: $57,000,000 (estimated)
Opening Weekend USA: $12,170,536, 19 October 1997
Gross USA: $60,944,660
Cumulative Worldwide Gross: $152,944,660

Keanu Reeves (https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000206)'s suit gets darker as the movie progresses. It starts as a light color and then goes through increasingly dark shades of gray. By the end of the movie, his suit is black. This is indicative of his character's decreasing morality throughout the movie.


IMDB (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118971/)

7DMDscGOUpg

Related?:
'Evil Is An Abstract' (Dogma deleted scene)
J9qAqwIW704

[Mike]

John here's a few more things you may not have known about that movie..

Keanu Reeves was assigned an acting coach for the role by the studio, but he refused to work with him. Instead, he woke up 2 days before filming began, remembered that he needed to establish a character, and wound up working steadily for the next 48 hours with a semi-catatonic, drug addicted subnormal he found sleeping under a bridge.

When discussing his preparation for the role years later he said, "I just watched him closely that entire time and did exactly what he did, which was nothing. He was just a blank sheet. So I brought that to the role and I think I nailed it."

More fun facts: Al Pacino died during filming. He died of frustration. Keanu's acting killed him. Liza Minnelli had fully transitioned by then, and replaced him seamlessly. Very few people noticed. In fact, the Al Pacino you see today is really Liza Minnelli. It's true, just ask fake Paul McCartney.

[Mike]

Good morning - love your work

I see that many Christians have cognitive dissonance when asked ‘ if God is all powerful does his lack of action against you mean he endorses you?’

I mean maybe this war between good and evil is fake , you are a manufactured fake enemy like Osama Bin Laden ? Do you think that the arrival of the Aquarian age and the kingdom of God on earth will include the illegal extra judicial killing of a body double and the fake news declaring the end of all evil?


if God is all knowing, all pervasive, and all powerful, what does he lack?

limitation!

so he manufactured limitation in 3d, and, ironically, whole new worlds opened up to him.

but anytime you reduce yourself, dimensionally, there is a price to pay. that price is Me. it is interesting that you assign God all these qualities, all powerful etc, and yet you imagine He's created an adversary that might be able to beat Him. but he didn't create me; i am Him. i would never want to eliminate Him, or Him me, because we can't exist without each other here in 3d. are you familiar with Jung? well, think of me as God's shadow then.

[Mike]

Edit: Missed a comma, scared to use a semi-colon.Good call. :thumbsup: Using semi-colons in a message to Satan is sure to end badly!

I can confirm that :bigsmile:






never use semi colons.

they are transvestite hermaphrodites representing only nothing. all they do is show you've been to college.

I remember that post. (http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/grrrrr.gif)

In 8th grade Language Arts class, we learned about colons, semi-colons and reviewed diagrams and Venn diagrams. Diagrams were taught at 5th & 6th grade levels. So no, it’s not college level stuff. It was basic LA curriculum in elementary, middle school and junior high.


http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/Notices/diagram.jpg

While I’m at it, we were also taught to use capitals letters when we begin sentences.

One last pet peeve, Mr. Satan, most know to capitalize ‘I’ when speaking about themselves. In some circles, such as hand writing analysis, the graphologist makes note of the lower case ‘i'. It may indicate how the writer feels about him/herself. Attention to detail is important or at least it was in the 20th century.

Fingers crossed there are no misspelled words or grammar errors or I’ll be joining you in heLL-o. Thanks to everyone that has the grace to let it go when I mess up on spelling and grammar.

* Hope that wasn’t too harsh, Mr. Satan. http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/flirty-hearts.gif

http://paula.avalonlibrary.net/smilies/drink-slides.gif

♡


well that's a kurt vonnegut quote...so take it up with him.

tell him i sent you.

[onawah]

Huh! I see you trying to cover your tracks here. :nono:
Sorry, it's not going to work.:stop:
The gig is up.:warning2:
(For anyone who doesn't know what I'm referring to, see post #161.)

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1WuC-c_FySc/maxresdefault.jpg

Face it, you've been outclassed yet again.
You've admitted to it yourself that you are fading, so don't imagine that you can backtrack now. :dancing:
Those fancy moves don't impress. :tsk:

The only "out" I am seeing to substantiate your claim to immortality would have to be fulfilling the prediction of some poetic types who envisioned you as becoming once more a glorious Angel of the Light.
I think it's time you start imagining what that would look like and acting on it; otherwise it's likely to be a matter of too little too late. :clock:
And no, you will not be forgiven for reducing Mike to such a pathetic, regressive :( state until you do...





Good morning - love your work

I see that many Christians have cognitive dissonance when asked ‘ if God is all powerful does his lack of action against you mean he endorses you?’

I mean maybe this war between good and evil is fake , you are a manufactured fake enemy like Osama Bin Laden ? Do you think that the arrival of the Aquarian age and the kingdom of God on earth will include the illegal extra judicial killing of a body double and the fake news declaring the end of all evil?


if God is all knowing, all pervasive, and all powerful, what does he lack?

limitation!

so he manufactured limitation in 3d, and, ironically, whole new worlds opened up to him.

but anytime you reduce yourself, dimensionally, there is a price to pay. that price is Me. it is interesting that you assign God all these qualities, all powerful etc, and yet you imagine He's created an adversary that might be able to beat Him. but he didn't create me; i am Him. i would never want to eliminate Him, or Him me, because we can't exist without each other here in 3d. are you familiar with Jung? well, think of me as God's shadow then.

[Mike]

i don't believe in angels, onawah. the only angel i know is a spanish guy i was grooming for possession once, back in 1994. angel ignacio his name was.

i was so close to dragging this man into hell, but then i saw something that stopped me in my tracks. next to his bed he had a bucket full of condoms. the strange thing about this was that he'd been with the same woman for years. they lived together. isn't condom-free sex the whole point of a long term relationship? just the thought of being relegated to a life of bland sh!tty condom sex made me take pity on this man, and i let him off the hook. you see, he was in hell already. you women have to realize that wearing a condom, for a man, is no different than dipping your d!ck in concrete, letting it harden, and then attempting to f#ck a manhole.

anyway, you were saying something about forgiveness?

[onawah]

Well, there you go! On your path upwards...Showing some compassion and empathy.
See, I knew you had it in you!
Admit it now, it does have some appeal.
Indulge yourself in some fantasies and you might even surprise yourself.

https://dasg7xwmldix6.cloudfront.net/episodes/797585_FkWO1aGC.jpg
I can't wait to see the transformation.

Then we can talk more about forgiveness.

(By the way, condom sex isn't much fun for women either.

https://ugc.reveliststatic.com/gen/full/2016/11/08/12/cu/pm/pogopbs7k8y.png

Some compassion for the woman wouldn't be entirely out of order.)

i don't believe in angels, onawah. the only angel i know is a spanish guy i was grooming for possession once, back in 1994. angel ignacio his name was.

i was so close to dragging this man into hell, but then i saw something that stopped me in my tracks. next to his bed he had a bucket full of condoms. the strange thing about this was that he'd been with the same woman for years. they lived together. isn't condom-free sex the whole point of a long term relationship? just the thought of being relegated to a life of bland sh!tty condom sex made me take pity on this man, and i let him off the hook. you see, he was in hell already. you women have to realize that wearing a condom, for a man, is no different than dipping your d!ck in concrete, letting it harden, and then attempting to f#ck a manhole.

anyway, you were saying something about forgiveness?

[onawah]

PS You are sounding a bit wistful there...
That's really a very good sign, BUT you won't go getting too soft and repentant on us, now, will you?

https://qph.fs.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-260a6f2e15d29a328a879c7b5c9512bd

Becoming an Angel of Light again will require a lot of fortitude, you know.

https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-pR8FtJz8xZQ/UHh6E7-XTwI/AAAAAAAAQCc/tERyq-JXaGE/s1600/GustaveDoreParadiseLostSatanProfile.jpg

No more whining, self-indulgent temper tantrums, for one thing!

https://www-images.christianitytoday.com/images/89770.jpg?w=1200




anyway, you were saying something about forgiveness?

[Tracie (Bodhicee)]

omg Mike oops, Satan. You are a riot. Bravo. <3

[Tracie (Bodhicee)]

Well, there you go! On your path upwards...Showing some compassion and empathy.
See, I knew you had it in you!
Admit it now, it does have some appeal.
Indulge yourself in some fantasies and you might even surprise yourself.

https://dasg7xwmldix6.cloudfront.net/episodes/797585_FkWO1aGC.jpg
I can't wait to see the transformation.

Then we can talk more about forgiveness.

(By the way, condom sex isn't much fun for women either.

https://ugc.reveliststatic.com/gen/full/2016/11/08/12/cu/pm/pogopbs7k8y.png

Some compassion for the woman wouldn't be entirely out of order.)

i don't believe in angels, onawah. the only angel i know is a spanish guy i was grooming for possession once, back in 1994. angel ignacio his name was.

i was so close to dragging this man into hell, but then i saw something that stopped me in my tracks. next to his bed he had a bucket full of condoms. the strange thing about this was that he'd been with the same woman for years. they lived together. isn't condom-free sex the whole point of a long term relationship? just the thought of being relegated to a life of bland sh!tty condom sex made me take pity on this man, and i let him off the hook. you see, he was in hell already. you women have to realize that wearing a condom, for a man, is no different than dipping your d!ck in concrete, letting it harden, and then attempting to f#ck a manhole.

anyway, you were saying something about forgiveness?

Onawah. Nailed it girl. (I'm nearly choking on my lunch here right now. So very very funny)... Thank you all so much!

Wishing Satan a manhole alternative hahaha.:happythumbsup:

[Constance]

ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[onawah]

Looks like you are running out of hidey holes, and just in time for the holidays!



Unearthed - Rome's Gate to Hell (Hierapolis)
250,006 views•Nov 25, 2020
Ancient History Nerd
59.3K subscribers
Experts investigate a legend of a portal to the underworld in the ancient city of Hierapolis.
HTQZreirbew

[Mike]

I've been meaning to ask, is there a Mrs Satan?


Why? Are you interested in the job darling?

Ive been around longer than you can imagine, so there have been many Mrs Satans during that time. But I've been single for roughly 2000 years now. Hairiest palms in the universe, sad to say.

[Mark (Star Mariner)]

Maybe there's no Mrs Satan, but you've been shagging way too many prostitutes. Your bastard spawn are running riot down here. Time to start wearing condoms, boy.

[onawah]

Someone was asking about what part you took in the 2020 election.
We might not get an honest answer from you, but this probably answers that question pretty well:
kE5s3-DXLeU

[atman]

I've been meaning to ask, is there a Mrs Satan?


Why? Are you interested in the job darling?

Ive been around longer than you can imagine, so there have been many Mrs Satans during that time. But I've been single for roughly 2000 years now. Hairiest palms in the universe, sad to say.

You, big liar!

How about this very recent Mrs Satan?

KABSYzPqTTg

[Constance]

ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[Innocent Warrior]

i was so close to dragging this man into hell, but then i saw something that stopped me in my tracks. next to his bed he had a bucket full of condoms. the strange thing about this was that he'd been with the same woman for years. they lived together. isn't condom-free sex the whole point of a long term relationship? just the thought of being relegated to a life of bland sh!tty condom sex made me take pity on this man, and i let him off the hook. you see, he was in hell already. you women have to realize that wearing a condom, for a man, is no different than dipping your d!ck in concrete, letting it harden, and then attempting to f#ck a manhole.

https://mumslounge.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/laugh-coffee-spit.gif

[onawah]

I happened to see this image of a gigantic slug

https://projectavalon.net/Giant_African_Land_Snail.jpg

...and it made me think of our conversation about your current host, Mike, whom you compared to a slug here:
(https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?105444-I-Am-The-TRUE-Satan-Any-Questions&p=1389006&viewfull=1#post1389006)

"A level of poetry is almost required, and my vehicle isn't up to it at the moment..the slug." I feel a need to defend him, despite how distasteful slugs may be (though the above specimen actually looks quite cuddly...)
For I've often wished I could give Mike a hug for the many times he's made us laugh with his outrageous, no-holds-barred, ridiculous sense of humor.
Of course, I don't know if that image of someone out trick-or-treating in a slug costume was actually Mike (which I posted here):


So I would suggest you vacate poor Mike asap (who, if he has become sluggish, has only you to blame).
(Here he is out trick-or-treating, poor thing...:( )

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/57/0f/df/570fdfb5481a5074b14af0b35dc0a585.jpg
...but the mental image was poetic, at least, and certainly heart-rending, which brings me back to my point.
Is it his outrageous, no-holds-barred comical sense of humor that caused you to choose him as your current host?
(Were you perhaps, a bit envious...?? :evil:)
Though lately I see he has mainly just been expressing various stages of outrage (sometimes thinly disguised as tolerance) about a myriad of issues such as New Age Rationality, Corey Goode and other "Pretenders", Cancel Culture, and so on...
I suppose it's a given that the more agreeable aspects of your chosen vehicles would eventually be eclipsed by their more disagreeable ones, but could you be persuaded to ease off a bit?

I expect it was when our favorite Jester was deep in his cups

https://projectavalon.net/Jester_deep_in_his_cups.jpg

...that you were able to take up occupation.
But given that God must have created you for your entertainment value, we should at least give you credit for that.
And so I offer you a conciliatory toast to the New Year...

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQCWlXenL5SyNDNVmRWvnLYNDJzK7UDvJgjBg&usqp=CAU

...And inquire if perhaps you would provide us with some insights into what you might have planned for 2021, and what you may have gained, or possibly even learned, from the lessons of the disaster that was 2020?

https://projectavalon.net/Nobody_move.jpg

[Mike]

2020? What have I learned? Well I've seen so many epochs come and go that nothing surprises me anymore. The electromagnetic spectrum might help to provide an analogy: Just as you are only able to see a small portion of the spectrum called visible light, so too are you only able to truly comprehend one small slice of history. This leaves your relativity, and therfore your perspective, lacking.

My perspective is unimaginably larger in scope, which may make my observations difficult for you to grasp. So I could either try to explain them anyway or say something obvious and well-worn instead, something like with each new year comes new opportunities. I'm tempted to do just that.

Any self-help guru or shrink will tell you to have a schedule. A schedule gives order to chaos. It's mentally comforting. That's all well and good when the world is functioning in a predictable manner. But when things become jumbled and unpredictable, and schedules harder to keep, the mental loyalty one has towards order only causes grief and anxiety. Blessed are the disorderly, for they have made peace with chaos. They will inherit what's left of the earth after certain people and things are done doing what they're currently doing with it.

Satan's lesson for the day: get rid of your schedule. Get comfortable with chaos. You'll need to in order to survive what's coming.

That's also a great way to develop a humorous side. Allow yourself to almost to mad. Dangle from a mental cliff for about 20 years, without ever quite going over. Flirt aggressively with madness and destruction. Allow yourself some calmer moments from time to time, using whatever means necessary. As you cross from calmness to madness, and from madness to calmness, you'll discover a small space between the two. Linger there long enough and you'll find your humor. It's kind of like a prize for surviving. If you cannot linger in that space very long, you will likely become the type that scolds men for wearing sunglasses and purchases Matthew Mournian's $500 "Blueflame Attunement" protocol.

But you didn't come here for that. You wanted bad jokes. So here are some of the best you'll ever hear, straight from the master:

maLEZzXfFkQ

[onawah]

Hmmmm...not just bad__TERRIBLE!! :sad:
Not to mention corny and inane.
This does not bode at all well for 2021.:tsk::pout:

[Vangelo]

OMG, I am in trouble. Big trouble. I laughed at that Norm MacDonald compilation and am still giggling. This is what happens to someone after spending 2020 socially distanced from everyone else.

[Strat]

I wasn't sure where else to put this: https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2020/jul/06/upward-thrusting-buildings-ejaculating-cities-sexist-leslie-kern-phallic-feminist-city-toxic-masculinity

I don't mean to be rude when I say it must be rough being Leslie Kern. In her mind the world is out to get her, everywhere she looks she sees oppression. The worst part is I imagine she annoys real feminists and women in general because she muddies the waters of any pro feminist agenda and real life issues that need to be addressed.

[Mike]

I wasn't sure where else to put this: https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2020/jul/06/upward-thrusting-buildings-ejaculating-cities-sexist-leslie-kern-phallic-feminist-city-toxic-masculinity

I don't mean to be rude when I say it must be rough being Leslie Kern. In her mind the world is out to get her, everywhere she looks she sees oppression. The worst part is I imagine she annoys real feminists and women in general because she muddies the waters of any pro feminist agenda and real life issues that need to be addressed.




"...I read the news today oh boy..."

"...and i just had to laugh, i saw the photograph...."
usNsCeOV4GM

[Strat]

https://gmg-gmg-prod.cdn.arcpublishing.com/resizer/p6zpkmS5cJTHsSHMU0NeXWNVgc0=/800x450/smart/filters:format(jpeg):strip_exif(true):strip_icc(true):no_upscale(true):quality(65)/cloudfront-us-east-1.images.arcpublishing.com/gmg/TVS6DE6TBVBXBFFRVRBT4BXALM.jpg

Why must I be exposed to this imagery when I check the news? This is more offensive than anything on Porn Hub.

If France, Spain, or England wants to reclaim FL territories then I am now open to this idea. Whatcha got to offer?

[Mike]

What's wrong with pornhub? Watch it blasphemer!

When I read about England, I'm almost pleased to have the Biden/Harris ticket on the horizon. Things seem disastrous there. I love English culture, but I think John Cleese is right about it vanishing in the face of heavy immigration. And they seem even more politically correct than America.

But I still think I might take England over France or Spain, for the very simple reason that I wouldn't have to learn another language. Plus, aside from how many Messi netted for Barcelona maybe, I see and know very little about Spain. I took Spanish for several years, but my vocabulary is still limited to asking if I can use the bathroom.

France? France makes about as much noise as Mongolia. I have no idea what's going on there. If the deal included a date with Marion Cotillard, I might be willing to sell Florida back to the French. That and an autographed version of "Journey To The End Of The Night". But till then I'm holding firm.

Mike here by the way. Satan is off running errands

[onawah]

OH... blah blah blah....and :blah:....and ...whatever...:p :nono:
(You'll just have to bear with some of us for awhile, Satan, if we aren't in the
"Old Lang Syne" state of mind just now...:mmph:)
https://i.redd.it/k4pwj38j3vr21.jpg

'Cause it looks like this is exactly what happened, and it's got a lot of people in a silly Satanic panic.

And BTW, as if plenty of us haven't viewed that "unimaginably larger perspective" ourselves, and "dangled from a mental cliff for about 20 years, without ever quite going over."
The only difference is, we've done it in the span of a single lifetime:clock: while it's taking you epochs.:bored: :yawn:
Face it, Satan, you are just a very slow learner...if that..:doh::facepalm:

I certainly didn't ask for terrible jokes ("bad" is much too kind a description). Those just made me want to :lalala: :yuck:...which no doubt was your intention.

But it's nice to see Mike coming back on track...
He isn't vaingloriously pretentious and can tell a funny story the way it ought to be told. :nod::jester: :smokin:
And he's got a good fanbase :fans: here already without having to resort to outright bragging and blatant self-advertisement.

You know, I had some hope for you in 2020 but it looks like all your New Year's Resolutions have just gone to Hell, as usual. :sad:
While you're off running errands Satan, I think you should consider hitching a ride to Mars :ufo:
I hear they are accepting all kinds nowadays...and it looks like somebody's already carved your face out on the surface.
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5zyDFPrDhhk/hqdefault.jpg
Considering how dull it must be up there, you might feel quite welcome.
But then, you hate being loved, so maybe the Moon would be a better option.
As busy as it's getting to be there, you would be very much in the way and possibly a source of even greater irritation than here on Earth, which would suit you.
And I would think the Dark Side, which has become very trendy, might be just to your taste.
https://s9.osdb.link/features/6/3/4/542436.jpg




2020? What have I learned? Well I've seen so many epochs come and go that nothing surprises me anymore. The electromagnetic spectrum might help to provide an analogy: Just as you are only able to see a small portion of the spectrum called visible light, so too are you only able to truly comprehend one small slice of history. This leaves your relativity, and therfore your perspective, lacking.

My perspective is unimaginably larger in scope, which may make my observations difficult for you to grasp. So I could either try to explain them anyway or say something obvious and well-worn instead, something like with each new year comes new opportunities. I'm tempted to do just that.

Any self-help guru or shrink will tell you to have a schedule. A schedule gives order to chaos. It's mentally comforting. That's all well and good when the world is functioning in a predictable manner. But when things become jumbled and unpredictable, and schedules harder to keep, the mental loyalty one has towards order only causes grief and anxiety. Blessed are the disorderly, for they have made peace with chaos. They will inherit what's left of the earth after certain people and things are done doing what they're currently doing with it.

Satan's lesson for the day: get rid of your schedule. Get comfortable with chaos. You'll need to in order to survive what's coming.

That's also a great way to develop a humorous side. Allow yourself to almost to mad. Dangle from a mental cliff for about 20 years, without ever quite going over. Flirt aggressively with madness and destruction. Allow yourself some calmer moments from time to time, using whatever means necessary. As you cross from calmness to madness, and from madness to calmness, you'll discover a small space between the two. Linger there long enough and you'll find your humor. It's kind of like a prize for surviving. If you cannot linger in that space very long, you will likely become the type that scolds men for wearing sunglasses and purchases Matthew Mournian's $500 "Blueflame Attunement" protocol.

But you didn't come here for that. You wanted bad jokes. So here are some of the best you'll ever hear, straight from the master:

maLEZzXfFkQ

[Strat]

But I still think I might take England over France or Spain, for the very simple reason that I wouldn't have to learn another language. Plus, aside from how many Messi netted for Barcelona maybe, I see and know very little about Spain. I took Spanish for several years, but my vocabulary is still limited to asking if I can use the bathroom.

France? France makes about as much noise as Mongolia. I have no idea what's going on there. If the deal included a date with Marion Cotillard, I might be willing to sell Florida back to the French. That and an autographed version of "Journey To The End Of The Night". But till then I'm holding firm.


Unfortunately you're right, those sneaky English win again. Their food sucks and their cars are worse but their beer is great and I like their witty charisma.

[Mike]

But I still think I might take England over France or Spain, for the very simple reason that I wouldn't have to learn another language. Plus, aside from how many Messi netted for Barcelona maybe, I see and know very little about Spain. I took Spanish for several years, but my vocabulary is still limited to asking if I can use the bathroom.

France? France makes about as much noise as Mongolia. I have no idea what's going on there. If the deal included a date with Marion Cotillard, I might be willing to sell Florida back to the French. That and an autographed version of "Journey To The End Of The Night". But till then I'm holding firm.


Unfortunately you're right, those sneaky English win again. Their food sucks and their cars are worse but their beer is great and I like their witty charisma.



My friend Jay was in England a few years ago. A real foodie, Jay is. He called me on the third or fourth day and sounded like he was ready to weep. The food, he said, was awful. In his desperation he went purely with soft snack foods. But even those tasted bad, according to him. He couldn't believe it.

I wonder if American food tastes crappy to the English?

I appreciate the English for the same reasons you do. I had several English soccer coaches growing up, and I found them to be utterly terrifying. They were devastatingly blunt and direct. It was a frightening novelty for a player like me, who had been coddled and complimented from the time I was 7 till 18.

I'll never forget a recruiting trip I had once, and my meeting with this Brit coach. For context: I'd been on several recruiting trips before I met with this guy, and all the coaches had been very accommodating and almost fawning actually in their approach. Some of these guys were calling me 2, 3 times a week..one practically begging me to go to his school. You'd think it would be flattering, but at the time I recall it mostly being embarrassing.

But the Brit guy was different. He looked me right in my eyes the entire time, and basically told me I wasn't sh!t. But it was done without malice, if you can imagine that. He was just being himself. He sat at a desk with a poster on the wall behind it, which was of him playing in the world cup, clashing with the great Michel Platini. I distinctly recall him comparing me to some other player of his, and the implication was: this guy wasn't very good when he came here and neither are you, but he became a solid player and you can too perhaps. That was his recruiting pitch! lol. It was kind of impressive actually.

[Mike]

Nat i'll let Satan respond to you when he returns:) That all sounded like it was directed at him, so..

[Mike]

Strat I got curious and looked that coach up. His name is Paul James. He's actually Welsh but became a Canadian citizen in 1983. And he represented Canada in the 1986 World Cup in Mexico. He lived a largely successful life until recently, when he was fired for crack cocaine use. As of 2018 he was living as a homeless man in a Canadian park as some sort of protest against mental illness discrimination.

I was shocked to see that. He was such a formidable man when I saw him. In my naivete, I mistook his Welsh accent for an English one.

Here's the poster that was hanging on his wall that day:
https://www.thestar.com/content/dam/thestar/news/gta/2018/09/07/he-was-a-canadian-soccer-star-now-hes-homeless-and-starving-himself-in-a-toronto-park-on-a-lonely-crusade-for-justice/james_vs_platini.jpg


This is how I recall him appearing back then, more or less. He was younger but that's basically it:
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xa78OjE7OKY/maxresdefault.jpg

And now as a homeless man:
https://www.thestar.com/content/dam/thestar/news/gta/2018/09/07/he-was-a-canadian-soccer-star-now-hes-homeless-and-starving-himself-in-a-toronto-park-on-a-lonely-crusade-for-justice/_1wider_portrait.jpg

Here's his wiki:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_James_(soccer)

And here's his story about addiction and homelessness. It's quite a story!:
https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2018/09/07/he-was-a-canadian-soccer-star-now-hes-homeless-and-starving-himself-in-a-toronto-park-on-a-lonely-crusade-for-justice.html

[Strat]

Maybe sounds weird but you should consider yourself lucky you had that run in with him.


In my naivete, I mistook his Welsh accent for an English one.


Don't beat yourself up. We Americans aren't good at this. I bet most think Cockney is Aussie.

[Innocent Warrior]

Nat i'll let Satan respond to you when he returns:) That all sounded like it was directed at him, so..

Satan’s out? Bummer.

S A T A N
S A T A N
S A T A N

There you go, conjured him up for you, Nat.

[onawah]

Never far away, is he? :evil:
:mmph:
The ball is still in his court, as far as I'm concerned. :bowl::juggle::warning2:

At least there has been some progress, and Mike is thinking about getting back in the game, even if it was only "back in the day".
That's a step up from slug life, at least, and perhaps augers a better game in 2021 after all.

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51K4l9Is+WL.jpg
(Just kidding, Mike. ;))
And after all, a certain CNN Exec said, "the US would be better off if it were run by the NFL".
https://www.independentsentinel.com/cnn-tapes-wed-be-better-off-if-nfl-ran-the-country/
(He was referring to mask-wearing :facemask: and social distancing :hand:, which I won't even comment on, but with the general principal, being that the kind of lawless behavior we see in government would never be tolerated on a playing field, I totally agree.)



Nat i'll let Satan respond to you when he returns:) That all sounded like it was directed at him, so..

Satan’s out? Bummer.

S A T A N
S A T A N
S A T A N

There you go, conjured him up for you, Nat.

[ExomatrixTV]

John here's a few more things you may not have known about that movie..

Keanu Reeves was assigned an acting coach for the role by the studio, but he refused to work with him. Instead, he woke up 2 days before filming began, remembered that he needed to establish a character, and wound up working steadily for the next 48 hours with a semi-catatonic, drug addicted subnormal he found sleeping under a bridge.

When discussing his preparation for the role years later he said, "I just watched him closely that entire time and did exactly what he did, which was nothing. He was just a blank sheet. So I brought that to the role and I think I nailed it."

More fun facts: Al Pacino died during filming. He died of frustration. Keanu's acting killed him. Liza Minnelli had fully transitioned by then, and replaced him seamlessly. Very few people noticed. In fact, the Al Pacino you see today is really Liza Minnelli. It's true, just ask fake Paul McCartney.


Thanks to you Mike ...you inspired me to look for more:



Keanu Reeves on 'The Devil's Advocate' & his co-star Al Pacino - Sept 2013

872210746609861
source (https://www.facebook.com/keanuplanet/videos/872210746609861/)


1997 Keanu Reeves / The Devil's Advocate / on the set

HYVY5xoQ9j0


HIDDEN MESSAGES IN DEVILS ADVOCATE You Just Won´t Believe:

7DcS2vvstgk


10 Things You Didn't know About DevilsAdvocate

XFq1un-CVto

[Mike]

Good stuff John:thumbsup:

I actually like Keanu Reeves. He just happened to be awful in that one movie. They shoulda gotten Ed Norton for that role, or someone of that ilk.

Reeves is not the greatest actor, but I can't imagine some of my favorite movies without him in them, Point Break in particular. I love that movie, and Reeves is great in it. And more recently the John Wick movies. And of course The Matrix trilogy. He's been in tons of good movies and he's been good in them, to be fair.

[Free Thinker]

This thread is absolutely hilarious. :D LOL. Makes me want to hee haw all the way to China... On second thought, I don't want to go to China, so I will just hee haw myself right back.... hehehehehehe

So, I have a question(s) as well.

Deer Satan (or should I say Goat Satan?),

Do you have the ability to spontaneously generate magic wands of whatever from your spaded arse whenever you like to achieve any purpose you desire? Must make it really hard to sit down, now doin't it? Oh, wait, nah, that spaded tail will do that all by itself, yep....

Edit: Still reading all the posts, but felt compelled to comment just now.

[Free Thinker]

Oh you are sooo baaad, Satan.

You can’t return souls btw, we had a deal and I want my castle.

It's like what Anya (formerly Anyanka) the character on the Buffy, the Vampire Slayer TV show said in Season 7 of the series when it was still "on the air". Referencing the First Evil and whatnot...

"Oh puhleese...
How many times have I heard THAT one before?
I am so bad I am badder than all the others combined,
I am so bad I don't even have a name for my extreme utter baddiness...
I am so bad I even copyrighted the word 'bad', all the others are just imitators...

I am so bad, bad, baddy bad bad, does it make you horny?"

Not the exact words, but close enough, hehe.

[Free Thinker]

Oh you are sooo baaad, Satan.

You can’t return souls btw, we had a deal and I want my castle.


A deal is a deal darling. The castle is yours. I shall build one of my own across the moat, and I will look longingly upon yours from my turret, waiting patiently for you to come to your senses and become my queen regnant.

Then we will arrive at diabolical plans to take over the planet over wine and enormous chicken thighs, and when one of us offers up a particularly brilliant idea, we shall toast the moon and the stars and laugh like this:
pVY1-v97Mic

Is there ice cream involved too? Count me in...

"After all, man (or any being for that matter) cannot survive on wine and chicken thighs alone, he must have ice cream..."

Would definitely help with the temperature extremes too, methinks. *makes thinking face*

[Free Thinker]

Dear Satan Claus,

do you receive presents yourself or you just give them to others?

:sun::heart:

No, he pisses on the presents first, then gifts them to others.

[Josh88]

What's up buttercup?

[Free Thinker]

Oh, got another question.

What do you use if/when your primary weapon of attack (pitchfork or trident) is unavailable? Do you just grab the nearest fork in the infernal drawer and use that instead?

"I've got me a pitchfork,
Oh wait, I canna' find me pitchfork of doom,
Never mind that, I got me a substitute,
So I continue to do the pitchfork pointy dance and batwing it...."

And don't tell me to fork off... I've heard that one before. Might wanna retune that tuning fork to higher vibrations of love and light...

All in good humor. :D

[Patient]

Mike, I had no idea you were a soccer guy! Awesome!

I was recruited for the under 16 Canadian team for the Fifa worlds tourney, ...uhm only a few years ago. lol

But then, as fate has directed me so often, I tore the muscles on the outside of my ankle a week before camp so I didn't get to go. Still played a lot through the years in many levels. My only professional game is one where I was paid $15 to play for some team in Toronto. Lol! I have no idea why they paid people the $15.00. It was probably a bribe - I was 17 at the time. Lol!

Have you been watching the Champions League games? Manchester vs PSG was a mess of a game - but entertaining.

[Mike]

Mike, I had no idea you were a soccer guy! Awesome!

I was recruited for the under 16 Canadian team for the Fifa worlds tourney, ...uhm only a few years ago. lol

But then, as fate has directed me so often, I tore the muscles on the outside of my ankle a week before camp so I didn't get to go. Still played a lot through the years in many levels. My only professional game is one where I was paid $15 to play for some team in Toronto. Lol! I have no idea why they paid people the $15.00. It was probably a bribe - I was 17 at the time. Lol!

Have you been watching the Champions League games? Manchester vs PSG was a mess of a game - but entertaining.


I think you and I discussed it a little on a different thread once. I do recall you telling me that. Very cool stuff. You must have been a hell of a player!

Here in the US, at least back when I was playing, we had something called ODP (Olympic development program). You started locally, and thru an endless series of tryouts (which were set up as tournaments) one could climb the ladder..the goal being the national side.

To just make the state team was a months long process. During these tournaments, after each game you'd be put in an upper or lower "pool". From the upper pool you might make the team. You had to get in the upper pool games if you wanted a chance to be selected. If you had a poor game and were put in a lower pool, you had to play your way back into the upper pool..which was an especially exhausting process. Happened to me a couple times.

I tried out 3 times. Every year i made the state team. I started too, which was pretty satisfying, because i could then reasonably say to myself, hey dude you're one of the top 11 players in NY state. Felt good.

The farthest I ever got was the regional pool. The US is divided up into 4 regions. I made the northeast regional pool. Had I made the regional team I would have had a chance to try out for the national side, but I came up a little short. But I came pretty damn close. I'm especially proud of that year because I was coming off a brutal leg break and there was a question over whether I'd ever play again. I was very very fast but after the injury I never regained my burst. And the Canadian doctors set my leg at a slight slope (i broke my leg in a Canadian tournament, in Gloucester) so it was slightly shorter than my left leg now, and it gave me all sorts of back issues later on. I just never regained my form. So our stories are sort of similar.

Had you ever heard of Paul James?

¤=[Post Update]=¤

FreeThinker, I can feel Satan meddling with my aura. I Have a hunch he'll be by soon to reply to your posts....we shall see

[Josh88]

I'll be your huckleberry.

[Patient]

Mike, I had no idea you were a soccer guy! Awesome!

I was recruited for the under 16 Canadian team for the Fifa worlds tourney, ...uhm only a few years ago. lol

But then, as fate has directed me so often, I tore the muscles on the outside of my ankle a week before camp so I didn't get to go. Still played a lot through the years in many levels. My only professional game is one where I was paid $15 to play for some team in Toronto. Lol! I have no idea why they paid people the $15.00. It was probably a bribe - I was 17 at the time. Lol!

Have you been watching the Champions League games? Manchester vs PSG was a mess of a game - but entertaining.


I think you and I discussed it a little on a different thread once. I do recall you telling me that. Very cool stuff. You must have been a hell of a player!

Here in the US, at least back when I was playing, we had something called ODP (Olympic development program). You started locally, and thru an endless series of tryouts (which were set up as tournaments) one could climb the ladder..the goal being the national side.

To just make the state team was a months long process. During these tournaments, after each game you'd be put in an upper or lower "pool". From the upper pool you might make the team. You had to get in the upper pool games if you wanted a chance to be selected. If you had a poor game and were put in a lower pool, you had to play your way back into the upper pool..which was an especially exhausting process. Happened to me a couple times.

I tried out 3 times. Every year i made the state team. I started too, which was pretty satisfying, because i could then reasonably say to myself, hey dude you're one of the top 11 players in NY state. Felt good.

The farthest I ever got was the regional pool. The US is divided up into 4 regions. I made the northeast regional pool. Had I made the regional team I would have had a chance to try out for the national side, but I came up a little short. But I came pretty damn close. I'm especially proud of that year because I was coming off a brutal leg break and there was a question over whether I'd ever play again. I was very very fast but after the injury I never regained my burst. And the Canadian doctors set my leg at a slight slope (i broke my leg in a Canadian tournament, in Gloucester) so it was slightly shorter than my left leg now, and it gave me all sorts of back issues later on. I just never regained my form. So our stories are sort of similar.

Had you ever heard of Paul James?

¤=[Post Update]=¤

FreeThinker, I can feel Satan meddling with my aura. I Have a hunch he'll be by soon to reply to your posts....we shall see

Yes - Paul James. Only recently caught up with what he went through.

You must have been good yourself to have achieved that level. Quite a difference in population from where I played vs you playing. We probably experienced similar coaching - I had English, Scottish, Italian and South American coaches at different times - a lot of different input and how they analyzed my ability. I still have some of the things that some of those coaches said to me echo in my mind to this day.

The strongest one word was from an Italian coach - he was so passionate he would stay at the field with me and a couple of the other kids (probably when I was 13/14) until the sun started to go down. He was always trying to teach me to be lighter on my feet and float. He would always say "You must have Tenacity!"

[Mike]

Onawah, I feel like I'm being repeatedly stabbed in the brain by your emojis. This is how you greet your immortal master? With foolishly grinning cartoon characters? We've come a long way from sacrificing virgins, sadly. You've all grown soft. I really miss the good old days, when summoning me at least required the gorging out of a few cattle sphincters under a full moon. Speaking of sphincters, who is this Josh88 guy tugging on my shirt? Someone change his diaper already. Daddy is busy. And Free Thinker, hello there. You're feisty, female, and you've used the word "horny" in a sentence: that automatically makes you the most interesting person on this thread besides me. I'm intrigued. I shall arrive in your dreams tonight and ask you 2 highly inappropriate questions. The answers will determine whether I let you live or not. And Not So Innocent Warrior, say my name 3 times again and see what happens. You can't hide from me. I see you! I can even smell you. What's that you're cooking anyway? Grilled cheese?

[onawah]

Don't be silly, Satan. As if I would bother stabbing you in your tiny brain.
Those emojis are meant to wake up Mike and make him realize when you have yet again invaded and taken over his rightful driver's seat.
In short, I was UNsummoning you!
And there Mike was, having such a cozy conversation with his mates about soccer ( or whatever...I confess I don't pay much attention to competitive sports) and you had to go and start meddling with his aura again. :tsk:
So rude! :nono:
It's no wonder you get so little respect these days, much less sacrificial virgins. :caked:
And you've got yet another thing wrong--those cattle eviscerations weren't done for you, those were done by ETs :alien: who have been here studying life forms.
Or maybe they are just trying to figure out if they can bioengineer cows they can take to other planets.
Since after all...

https://ih1.redbubble.net/image.404017879.1635/fposter,small,wall_texture,product,750x1000.jpg

But why don't you go and pester those little guys instead...maybe they will be willing to stroke your ailing ego for awhile (since humans have grown weary of that never-ending task).
Anyway, I hear you took my recent suggestion and acquired some real estate in outer space--are you considering setting up shop there?
That would add up, since it's getting close to the time when you and your minions will be cast into the outer darkness, isn't it?
It's pretty dark on Saturn, I hear...

https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/e15fb3a2-7e04-485f-acd1-775a58bbde1b/dceixjw-2fe44080-0642-4ae9-bcf0-90ff404bd1dc.jpg/v1/fill/w_1024,h_683,q_75,strp/satan_buys_property_in_outer_space_by_deadsteelfinger_dceixjw-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNh NWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7 InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2UxNWZiM2EyLTdlMDQtNDg1Zi1hY2QxLTc3NWE1OGJiZGUxYlwvZGNlaXhqdy0yZmU0NDA4MC0wNjQyLTRh ZTktYmNmMC05MGZmNDA0YmQxZGMuanBnIiwiaGVpZ2h0IjoiPD02ODMiLCJ3aWR0aCI6Ijw9MTAyNCJ9XV0sImF1ZCI6WyJ1cm46 c2VydmljZTppbWFnZS53YXRlcm1hcmsiXSwid21rIjp7InBhdGgiOiJcL3dtXC9lMTVmYjNhMi03ZTA0LTQ4NWYtYWNkMS03NzVh NThiYmRlMWJcL2RlYWRzdGVlbGZpbmdlci00LnBuZyIsIm9wYWNpdHkiOjk1LCJwcm9wb3J0aW9ucyI6MC40NSwiZ3Jhdml0eSI6 ImNlbnRlciJ9fQ.GE9gYcpAh9yiqVdkgcWqHD8AU0J2TO7YWmGwE68O8z0

I think that's a great idea, if I say so myself!
You might even get some of those little ETs to help you out and build you a temple or two.
And don't go pretending that they have actually been your servants all along.
We already know they have time traveled here from the future to figure out how to correct the course of human evolution--in other words--without your interference!

https://cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/80/750x445/959591.jpg

You know, you have become too predictable, it's getting really easy to second guess your next moves. ;)

PS How did that remote viewing of you by Ed Dames go from your perspective, BTW?

[Free Thinker]

I never got the dream memo, so I take that to mean your less than paltry attempts at trying to invade my dream world (and of course your complete and utter failure to do so, let's not forget THAT) just really has your goat hooves in quite the sticky and aggravated conundrum, doesn't it? :P

But I am appreciative of the compliments, regardless of your actual intent, which I use promptly to rise ever higher and higher into my True Nature Of Being, while you are still mucking about in your pit o' poop and egotistical drool. Drool so shiny it absolutely glitters in its sickening false light of "I wanna be more than I am, but can't." Because you know, "pit o' poop" thing and all. Must be a real downer, that, eh? XD

Oh, but wait! There's more! Call the divinely supportive hotline of '1800-I-Need-An-Angel', and watch them make a game out of hanging up on you. It's like that one Madonna song, "The Power of Goodbye". As in, goodbye. *click* (all credit goes where due for that last humorous quip, I am simply taking it out for a stroll here b/c it's all too appropriate... and stuff).

And speaking of annoying emojis... how's this for a wonderful start?

:p:ROFL::flower::happy::haha::laugh::dance::star::cake::bigsmile:YES!:angel::angel::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL ::ROFL::ROFL:

Nah nah nah nah nah!

I'd say more, but this is really the kind of thing that needs to be done "in stages".

*angelic singing on high ensues forevermore, as well as the beauty of the universe in all its wonderful and divinely gorgeous extravagance to remind us all (those of us who actually matter, that is) of where the real purpose of life and existence lies*

[Mike]

I never got the dream memo, so I take that to mean your less than paltry attempts at trying to invade my dream world (and of course your complete and utter failure to do so, let's not forget THAT) just really has your goat hooves in quite the sticky and aggravated conundrum, doesn't it? :P

But I am appreciative of the compliments, regardless of your actual intent, which I use promptly to rise ever higher and higher into my True Nature Of Being, while you are still mucking about in your pit o' poop and egotistical drool. Drool so shiny it absolutely glitters in its sickening false light of "I wanna be more than I am, but can't." Because you know, "pit o' poop" thing and all. Must be a real downer, that, eh? XD

Oh, but wait! There's more! Call the divinely supportive hotline of '1800-I-Need-An-Angel', and watch them make a game out of hanging up on you. It's like that one Madonna song, "The Power of Goodbye". As in, goodbye. *click* (all credit goes where due for that last humorous quip, I am simply taking it out for a stroll here b/c it's all too appropriate... and stuff).

And speaking of annoying emojis... how's this for a wonderful start?

:p:ROFL::flower::happy::haha::laugh::dance::star::cake::bigsmile:YES!:angel::angel::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL ::ROFL::ROFL:

Nah nah nah nah nah!

I'd say more, but this is really the kind of thing that needs to be done "in stages".

*angelic singing on high ensues forevermore, as well as the beauty of the universe in all its wonderful and divinely gorgeous extravagance to remind us all (those of us who actually matter, that is) of where the real purpose of life and existence lies*



Nah I was there, fully prepared to invade your dream world and screw up your life..but then I saw your slam poetry trophies and collection of Doreen Virtue books and realized you were doing that quite well on your own. I do have a set of ethics, you see. And I do feel something like sympathy too, particularly for fully grown women who hang Enya posters on their bedroom walls (Don't deny it. I saw it). And what's this weird obsession with drool and sh!t? I'm a divine beast for f#ck sake, not some potty training toddler. I haven't shat myself in literally thousands of years, so I don't wanna hear it (never trust a fart after you've eaten a cow fetus).

I will tell you a humiliating story about Mike though, seeing he's not here to protest (Off masturbating to Jordan Peterson most likely. What a little fan boy b!tch he is. How any of you tolerate that pompous twat is beyond me). He got very drunk about a year ago, passed out on a friend's couch, and pissed himself...leaving the cushions damp and stinky. When confronted he blamed it on the family dog. "Did the dog flip over the cushions too?" his friend asked.

[Mike]

Onawah, you appear to have asked an earnest question about Ed Dames. Thank you. I'm going to choose to ignore all the other sh!t you've written and attempt to answer it.

Actually I'm gonna ignore that question too.

[Free Thinker]

No, the real reason why you couldn't get into my dreams (as in it's a couldn't, not a wouldn't) was because the goodly vibrations are too high for you to penetrate. I'd start singing the 'Good Vibrations' song, but there's really no need for that. And oh, let's not forget, me and my collection of 'Love Conquers All' T-shirts were giving you a mighty hard time there as well. Even if I don't actually own any 'Love Conquers All' t-shirts, it's the thought and intention that counts here. *BOOM* In yo face!

In response to your slam poetry trophies and Doreen Virtue book collection insults my way, here's what I have to say about that.

Regarding the poetry, I do like poetry. I personally would leave the slamming part up to you though. After all, you do it so well, perhaps if we're all lucky, you'll slam those dang horns right off your head (and everywhere else where such applies). And....trophies? What a nice surprise.... I actually don't have any trophies, but it's so "nice" of you to think so. Hahahahahahahaha!

I am pretty sure I only own one Doreen Virtue book, might have owned a few other books of hers in the past, but certainly not a whole collection thereof like you're claiming. Which is yet another blockade to throw in your 'Not-So-All-Seeing-Eye' path.

Unless Enya can take the form of a unicorn, a herd of unicorns, a field of butterflies, an angel or something else along those lines, I am pretty sure I do not and have never had any Enya posters on my wall either...

And by the way, why settle for just the 'All-Seeing-Eye' path? What about the 'All-Smelling Nose' path? The All-Tasting Tongue? The All-Hearing Ear? The All-Touching Hand? Or is there a reason why the 'All-Seeing Eye' path is the only one that made the cut?

Almighty (Or Not) Powers

All-Smelling Nose: The ability to smell anything/everything.... no matter the distance. Be it roses, sex, dirty diapers, centuries old rotting garbage, an energetic army of farts, etc. You name it, you smell it!!!!!

All-Tasting Tongue: The ability to taste anything/everything... no matter the distance. The good, the bad, the ugly, the 'OMG, what did I just put into my mouth!!!' :D Any/all of it.

The All-Hearing Ear: The ability to hear anything/everything... no matter the distance. Everything from the sound of tires squealing on the road in order to avoid a collision, to puppy dogs yip yip yipping away as they play 'fetch that stick' with their owners, to happy, inspirational songs that must really give you the 'Mother of All Migraines' just listening to those beautiful, harmonic melodies of infinite peace and eternal happiness, to... Well, I am sure you get the "point". All three points in fact as it pertains to your infernal fork mentality, yah?

The All-Touching Hand: The ability to touch anything/everything... no matter the distance. I shall refrain from elaborating on this one, as no doubt your lower mind can fill in the blanks there.

In other words, why stick to only the 'All-Seeing-Eye' Path? Sounds like the coward's way out to me....

Can't smell this... can't taste this... can't hear this... can't touch this...

Also... DIVINE beast? Nah, I think you got that backwards. Just like you got everything else backwards. Do I see a pattern here? Yes, yes I do. Though the 'beast' part is definitely accurate.

Come on... what else do you *think* you know, that I will promptly prove you wrong about? Cuz, like, this is fun!!!!!!

And as for Mike and the embarrassing story you told about him, I'm sure Mike will have a few things to say about that, which I will leave up to him, of course.

'Nuff said.

:ROFL::ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:

[Free Thinker]

Onawah, you appear to have asked an earnest question about Ed Dames. Thank you. I'm going to choose to ignore all the other sh!t you've written and attempt to answer it.

Actually I'm gonna ignore that question too.

I think Satan's losing his steam. Whaddya'll think?

[onawah]

Certainly he's losing steam, but he's such a hot head :flame: it's bound to take a while before he burns out completely.
It's like watching a super slo-mo of the Wicked Witch of the West melting.
nKfvJiS35I8
(The emoji jabs seem to be effective in keeping him in line :moony:
We just have to take care not to start feeling sorry for him :wizard:, as he can smell pity :violin: from a mile away and will try to take advantage. :evil:)
He has a habit of going off :bolt: to some dark corner of his noxious domain and sulking :tsk: for interminable intervals when he's feeling slighted :frown: :sad:(which is most of the time these days).
So his appearances here are sporadic as you will notice if you read back over the thread.
His responses to posts directed at him will wax and wane accordingly as to whether he thinks he's being taken seriously or not. :suspicious: :twitch:
For example, he apparently thought at first that my question about Ed Dames remote viewing him was asked in earnest, and that got his attention.
Then I imagine on second thought he realized I wasn't earnestly wanting to know his impressions at all, but was just wondering if he was even aware that someone was remote viewing him (he's really not on the ball these days at all...:nhl_checking:)
I doubt that he did, and he was probably just feeling too dispirited to come up with a convenient lie, so he simply reneged :lalala: on any further response.
Which is typical when he feels he's in an unflattering spotlight. :eek: :faint2:
He hates being analyzed, :sherlock: :behindsofa: and that's probably why he responds so rarely to my posts, and so briefly when he does.
But I will continue to post because it catches the attention of others on the forum, and when they send him a message, he generally replies eventually with his usual asinine remarks and insults :brick: and that at least keeps him preoccupied for awhile.
It's possible that if no one posts on the thread at all anymore, he will simply find another victim to inhabit and leave Mike alone, but even Mike might agree that that would deprive us all of a chance to keep tabs on Satan.
I think we can all pardon Mike for any embarrassing things he may have done while under the influence (of Satan and/or alcohol, which are obviously associated), and about which he is generally unapologetic in any case (and probably with good reason).
So in that sense, we may owe Mike a debt of gratitude for allowing Satan to continue taking up residence in his being--for the time being.
Time being of the essence, and Satan surely knows his time is about up. :clock:

It's a pity though, that the former Avalon member who started the thread back in 2018 stating that he is the true Jesus didn't last on the forum long enough to take up a dialogue with Satan on this thread, which was started as a response to that one.
That probably would have been pretty interesting, and would certainly have pressed a lot of Satan's buttons :mad2:



Onawah, you appear to have asked an earnest question about Ed Dames. Thank you. I'm going to choose to ignore all the other sh!t you've written and attempt to answer it.

Actually I'm gonna ignore that question too.

I think Satan's losing his steam. Whaddya'll think?

[Mike]

Onawah, you appear to have asked an earnest question about Ed Dames. Thank you. I'm going to choose to ignore all the other sh!t you've written and attempt to answer it.

Actually I'm gonna ignore that question too.

I think Satan's losing his steam. Whaddya'll think?


Satan was losing his steam about 10 pages ago darling! I hope you're not just noticing now. If you're expecting some performing flea I'm not your guy. Mike might offer some jokes or a story, but I ain't him. And let's thank the halls of Hades for that! I got over the novelty of my cleverness long ago, and feel very little need to demonstrate it anymore. Mike on the other hand, the soulless, emotionally needy git he is...

Admitting you own a Doreen Virtue book has earned you some points with Satan. As a symbolic gesture of reciprocity, I'll admit to - when in the proper mood - enjoying a little Air Supply. But don't think this gesture makes us friends. I still hate you and everything your incense addled brain cells stand for.

Onawah, about Ed Dames...

Let me ask you this: have you heard much from Ed Dames in recent years? Yeah, neither have I. Oh, you want to know if I had anything to do with that, do you? Well just wait a moment while I act annoyingly coy about it..

....
....
....
....

Of course I f'ing did!

When my name is uttered, I'm obliged to arrive. So when Dames was announcing his strategy to the world on that silly radio show, I heard every last word of it. A fool that man is! It would have been no different had a general phoned his enemy and declared, "We're approaching from the south and we'll arrive on your shores at noon. You and your troops be ready!" He "remote viewed" me alright, and then I trapped him..much like you might a fly in a glass..watching it slowly die of oxygen deprivation before plucking off it's wings so it could drunkenly wobble it's way to an ignominious and humiliating death.

What does that all mean? Well I basically gave the man a spiritual lobotomy. I'll put you in charge of telling the owner of this place that we need a spiritual lobotomy emoji.

[Free Thinker]

I think it is high time for a time-out for you Satan. A permanent one. :ROFL:

In the meantime, I shall be content with throwing more emojis your way. I'd throw about 100 out there, but since there's a 20-emoji limit here, I'll take what I can get.

:p:p:p:p:Music::Music::Music::flower::flower::flower::flower::flower::flower::flower::star::star::st ar::peace::laugh:

[Free Thinker]

And here's another set of "annoying emojis". Y'know, for old time's sake.

:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p

Edit: Perhaps this thread should be titled "I am the TRUE Poop-On-A-Stick - Any Questions?". Might make that much more of a stinky headline.

[onawah]

I PMed Bill Ryan per your request for a new emoji representing spiritual lobotomy, Satan.
I will probably PM TinTin as well, as I think he is probably the one responsible for emojis.
Hopefully they will answer you here, right on this thread, as I'm sure they would have something worthwhile to contribute.
And no doubt you will enjoy the attention.
(I agree that would be a useful emoji, especially considering the vaccine news these days. I'm assuming you had something to do with concocting that poisonous prick?)

https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5a258560268b96818d908c0a/1573064785146-MVDMA1RISPWN1JJ6OWCR/ke17ZwdGBToddI8pDm48kMRyhYDgPk9y7GMUxyVGe-RZw-zPPgdn4jUwVcJE1ZvWQUxwkmyExglNqGp0IvTJZUJFbgE-7XRK3dMEBRBhUpzEOKU3ynhxGCOkjkiI2jkNnwo4GpKkY3nGgozguHn9FA2PHrUGCg52mo1A4uM7YTw/71345232_400681930506202_2550186481821941760_n.jpg?format=750w

You really do like to make people bleed, don't you?

Well, and thank you in return for the question, but actually I had never heard of Ed Dames before seeing the other current thread bringing our attention to his attempt to remote view you.
Easy for you to claim after the fact that you were fully aware, but I was really just wondering if you really were aware, or if you were just off sulking in a corner somewhere, or doing something reprehensible but unrelated.
We'll have to check on the timing and see what disasters were happening around then.
But I will have to leave it to other forum members to update us on the status of Ed Dames, post that remote viewing debacle.

What exactly is it that obliges you to arrive when your name is uttered?
Now there's a question for you, Satan, and I know we'd all like to hear the answer to that one.
Does it normally affect you like this...

https://townsquare.media/site/366/files/2020/08/tenacious-d-tribute-hero.jpg

...or do you welcome it at times?
What about when you are being Unsummoned?

Here's another question: what have you had to do with all the racism controversy going on now?
Are we going to have to start portraying you as black now (instead of red) in order to give the black race equal power, and take the red race off the hook?


https://townsquare.media/site/295/files/2012/10/Devil-face.jpg


Or is it that we have to assert that you are white because the whites are having their feet held to the fire these days?
Or perhaps that you are actually a woman to help ensure more equality for the genders?


https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/313e3955-f138-41a0-a71c-23e83698da2f/dcey08m-645d076a-e125-4ae0-ac87-170a3d28d4e6.jpg/v1/fill/w_1024,h_699,q_75,strp/satan_woman_by_paulbrake_dcey08m-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNh NWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7 ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9Njk5IiwicGF0aCI6IlwvZlwvMzEzZTM5NTUtZjEzOC00MWEwLWE3MWMtMjNlODM2OThkYTJmXC9kY2V5MDht LTY0NWQwNzZhLWUxMjUtNGFlMC1hYzg3LTE3MGEzZDI4ZDRlNi5qcGciLCJ3aWR0aCI6Ijw9MTAyNCJ9XV0sImF1ZCI6WyJ1cm46 c2VydmljZTppbWFnZS5vcGVyYXRpb25zIl19.FlBthYwKHo-pwMovPvsE9P2AqEXTnHGWYKJT52j8wOE


Or is it true that you are transexual?



https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EweHK-iWYAQouBs?format=jpg&name=900x900


(I wonder if Satan is getting tired of confusing and befuddling the far Left yet?
I have to give him credit for that piece of work, but I can certainly see how it may have been wearying even for him...
It may be that Satan will be mulling over how to answer those questions for some time, also how to make himself appear in a favorable light in the process.
But forum members don't have to wait for his replies if they care to post in this thread.
He can't resist posting here for the attention it gets him, though sometimes he can hold off for quite awhile if he just can't get the steam up.
But there's no harm in playing on this particular devil's playground, I think.)

https://c8.alamy.com/comp/2DWPH05/devil-alarm-clock-on-white-background-2DWPH05.jpg




Onawah, you appear to have asked an earnest question about Ed Dames. Thank you. I'm going to choose to ignore all the other sh!t you've written and attempt to answer it.

Actually I'm gonna ignore that question too.

I think Satan's losing his steam. Whaddya'll think?


Satan was losing his steam about 10 pages ago darling! I hope you're not just noticing now. If you're expecting some performing flea I'm not your guy. Mike might offer some jokes or a story, but I ain't him. And let's thank the halls of Hades for that! I got over the novelty of my cleverness long ago, and feel very little need to demonstrate it anymore. Mike on the other hand, the soulless, emotionally needy git he is...

Admitting you own a Doreen Virtue book has earned you some points with Satan. As a symbolic gesture of reciprocity, I'll admit to - when in the proper mood - enjoying a little Air Supply. But don't think this gesture makes us friends. I still hate you and everything your incense addled brain cells stand for.

Onawah, about Ed Dames...

Let me ask you this: have you heard much from Ed Dames in recent years? Yeah, neither have I. Oh, you want to know if I had anything to do with that, do you? Well just wait a moment while I act annoyingly coy about it..

....
....
....
....

Of course I f'ing did!

When my name is uttered, I'm obliged to arrive. So when Dames was announcing his strategy to the world on that silly radio show, I heard every last word of it. A fool that man is! It would have been no different had a general phoned his enemy and declared, "We're approaching from the south and we'll arrive on your shores at noon. You and your troops be ready!" He "remote viewed" me alright, and then I trapped him..much like you might a fly in a glass..watching it slowly die of oxygen deprivation before plucking off it's wings so it could drunkenly wobble it's way to an ignominious and humiliating death.

What does that all mean? Well I basically gave the man a spiritual lobotomy. I'll put you in charge of telling the owner of this place that we need a spiritual lobotomy emoji.

[Bill Ryan]

I PMed Bill Ryan per your request for a new emoji representing spiritual lobotomy, Satan.







https://projectavalon.net/lobotomy_sm.gif

~~~

I have a question for Satan. It's about depopulation.

I know you're behind the push to kill everyone off. You don't need to admit to that. But isn't that a little self-defeating?

With only a few humans left, you'd not have nearly as much fun playing with them all. And only the smarter ones might be still around, so they might not fall for your tricks so easily. What gives?

[happyuk]

1. If I were the Devil, by Paul Harvey (an American broadcaster) originally broadcast on April 3rd, 1965.

cg5i7OPRaNg


If I were the devil … If I were the Prince of Darkness, I’d want to engulf the whole world in darkness. And I’d have a third of its real estate, and four-fifths of its population, but I wouldn’t be happy until I had seized the ripest apple on the tree — Thee. So I’d set about however necessary to take over the United States. I’d subvert the churches first — I’d begin with a campaign of whispers. With the wisdom of a serpent, I would whisper to you as I whispered to Eve: ‘Do as you please.

To the young, I would whisper that ‘The Bible is a myth.’ I would convince them that man created God instead of the other way around. I would confide that what’s bad is good, and what’s good is ‘square.’ And the old, I would teach to pray, after me, ‘Our Father, which art in Washington…

And then I’d get organized. I’d educate authors in how to make lurid literature exciting, so that anything else would appear dull and uninteresting. I’d threaten TV with dirtier movies and vice versa. I’d pedal narcotics to whom I could. I’d sell alcohol to ladies and gentlemen of distinction. I’d tranquilize the rest with pills.

If I were the devil I’d soon have families at war with themselves, churches at war with themselves, and nations at war with themselves; until each in its turn was consumed. And with promises of higher ratings I’d have mesmerizing media fanning the flames. If I were the devil I would encourage schools to refine young intellects, but neglect to discipline emotions — just let those run wild, until before you knew it, you’d have to have drug sniffing dogs and metal detectors at every schoolhouse door.

Within a decade I’d have prisons overflowing, I’d have judges promoting pornography — soon I could evict God from the courthouse, then from the schoolhouse, and then from the houses of Congress. And in His own churches I would substitute psychology for religion, and deify science. I would lure priests and pastors into misusing boys and girls, and church money. If I were the devil I’d make the symbols of Easter an egg and the symbol of Christmas a bottle.

If I were the devil I’d take from those who have, and give to those who want until I had killed the incentive of the ambitious.

And what do you bet I could get whole states to promote gambling as the way to get rich? I would caution against extremes and hard work in Patriotism, in moral conduct. I would convince the young that marriage is old-fashioned, that swinging is more fun, that what you see on the TV is the way to be. And thus, I could undress you in public, and I could lure you into bed with diseases for which there is no cure. In other words, if I were the devil I’d just keep right on doing what he’s doing.

Paul Harvey, good day.

2. Interview With The Devil | Outwitting The Devil | The Secret To Freedom And Success By Napoleon Hill

Well worth a listen!

5YeIbiHg3co

[Mike]

I PMed Bill Ryan per your request for a new emoji representing spiritual lobotomy, Satan.







https://projectavalon.net/lobotomy_sm.gif

~~~

I have a question for Satan. It's about depopulation.

I know you're behind the push to kill everyone off. You don't need to admit to that. But isn't that a little self-defeating?

With only a few humans left, you'd not have nearly as much fun playing with them all. And only the smarter ones might be still around, so they might not fall for your tricks so easily. What gives?



It's a good question.

It's all to do with worthy opponents. If I can't stay interested and engaged, I risk blinking out of existence..at least from your perspective. My desire to exist and wreak havoc is mostly responsible for me keeping form in this dimension - that, and the energy I siphon off people I manipulate. The thing is, those people have to have energy worth siphoning.

If you put a mouse in a cage a snake will take it's sweet time eating it. There isn't much motivation involved in that game. And the energetic payoff is negligible.

I was in a shopping mall today, and I saw this woman toss 2 hamburgers in her mouth and finish them off in a matter of seconds, like a crocodile. And then she wiped her mouth with her shirt. After that she wadded up her bag and stared dumbly at the trash can, which was roughly 10 feet away, as if her jedi powers might cause it to slide to her side so she could forsake the 3 second effort walking to it. When she was comfortable no one was looking she tossed the bag awkwardly in the general direction of the trash can, missing by a good 5 feet. Then she got up and waddled off like a fat penguin, moving right past the bag without picking it up.

Not too far away a fully grown man was wiping a booger underneath his chair with his right hand while watching fake wrestling on his phone with his left

I ask you sincerely: why should these people even be allowed to exist? Why? So the fat penguin lady can mate with the fake wrestling loving booger guy?

I'm blessed in a way because I can remove emotion from any equation in a snap. You people call this "psychopathy". I call it convenient. If someone is drowning and you approach to assist, that person must stop flailing if you're both to survive. Otherwise you both die. A sober decision must be made in that instant, divorced from emotion. On earth, at this moment, the weak are flailing. You have to let them go. And I'm happy to take them. It leaves worthy opponents remaining, and that's where I truly get my kicks

p.s. thanks for the new emoji

[Mike]

Onawah, you're quite direct, aren't you? Asking about my sex life and all...

Fair enough.

I'll tell you briefly how all this sexual confusion came to be. The cliff notes anyway..

A friend once told me this story about an older couple who desperately wanted children but could never conceive. They'd been having sex for many, many years, daily!..so that wasn't the issue. The issue was, they had a profound misunderstanding about sex. It seemed impossible that they couldn't sort it out, but they couldn't. By age 50 the wife was incontinent and the man, named Larry, suffered many bacterial infections. They gave it up, and it left a huge hole in their souls.

The issue was this: the man had learned all he knew about sex from a short conversation with his older brother, where the brother had described a certain type of unconventional sex his girlfriend allowed only once a year, on his birthday..as a treat of sorts.

Shortly after his wife died of colon cancer Larry was on his death bed, dying of a broken heart. He and his brother spoke, and he expressed his deep sadness over never having a family. When it became apparent why, the older brother consoled Larry by telling him it had been his birthday nearly every day in this life, which was a nice consolation prize...wasn't it Larry? Larry? Larry are you still with me?

..Larry had died. The shock of his stupidity had stopped his heart.

Well this story just tickled me, and I made it my life's work to confuse everybody in similar ways. This is how it all started, but there's too much to be said about it all in one post. Ask me again later

[Mike]

1. If I were the Devil, by Paul Harvey (an American broadcaster) originally broadcast on April 3rd, 1965.

cg5i7OPRaNg


If I were the devil … If I were the Prince of Darkness, I’d want to engulf the whole world in darkness. And I’d have a third of its real estate, and four-fifths of its population, but I wouldn’t be happy until I had seized the ripest apple on the tree — Thee. So I’d set about however necessary to take over the United States. I’d subvert the churches first — I’d begin with a campaign of whispers. With the wisdom of a serpent, I would whisper to you as I whispered to Eve: ‘Do as you please.

To the young, I would whisper that ‘The Bible is a myth.’ I would convince them that man created God instead of the other way around. I would confide that what’s bad is good, and what’s good is ‘square.’ And the old, I would teach to pray, after me, ‘Our Father, which art in Washington…

And then I’d get organized. I’d educate authors in how to make lurid literature exciting, so that anything else would appear dull and uninteresting. I’d threaten TV with dirtier movies and vice versa. I’d pedal narcotics to whom I could. I’d sell alcohol to ladies and gentlemen of distinction. I’d tranquilize the rest with pills.

If I were the devil I’d soon have families at war with themselves, churches at war with themselves, and nations at war with themselves; until each in its turn was consumed. And with promises of higher ratings I’d have mesmerizing media fanning the flames. If I were the devil I would encourage schools to refine young intellects, but neglect to discipline emotions — just let those run wild, until before you knew it, you’d have to have drug sniffing dogs and metal detectors at every schoolhouse door.

Within a decade I’d have prisons overflowing, I’d have judges promoting pornography — soon I could evict God from the courthouse, then from the schoolhouse, and then from the houses of Congress. And in His own churches I would substitute psychology for religion, and deify science. I would lure priests and pastors into misusing boys and girls, and church money. If I were the devil I’d make the symbols of Easter an egg and the symbol of Christmas a bottle.

If I were the devil I’d take from those who have, and give to those who want until I had killed the incentive of the ambitious.

And what do you bet I could get whole states to promote gambling as the way to get rich? I would caution against extremes and hard work in Patriotism, in moral conduct. I would convince the young that marriage is old-fashioned, that swinging is more fun, that what you see on the TV is the way to be. And thus, I could undress you in public, and I could lure you into bed with diseases for which there is no cure. In other words, if I were the devil I’d just keep right on doing what he’s doing.

Paul Harvey, good day.

2. Interview With The Devil | Outwitting The Devil | The Secret To Freedom And Success By Napoleon Hill

Well worth a listen!

5YeIbiHg3co



Reading all that really warmed my heart. Hell of a plan, no?

[onawah]

I was sure you wouldn't mind, Satan, you being such an exhibitionist and all...

Onawah, you're quite direct, aren't you? Asking about my sex life and all...

I wasn't really asking about your sex life.
(Pardon me, but actually, I would rather be spared any details when it comes to that. )

https://images1.westword.com/imager/u/original/8781553/horrified.woman.thinkstock.jpg


(But you might find this thread to be of interest: "Men, ejaculating is the single biggest handicap you can give yourself in the game of life"
https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?114305-Men-ejaculating-is-the-single-biggest-handicap-you-can-give-yourself-in-the-game-of-life&p=1416119&viewfull=1#post1416119
And I might be interested in hearing your comments about that.

While readers of this thread might be interested in: "20 Basic Tactics Used By Narcissists, Sociopaths And Psychopaths To manipulate And Silence A Prey"
https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?97293-20-Basic-Tactics-Used-By-Narcissists-Sociopaths-And-Psychopaths-To-manipulate-And-Silence-A-Prey&p=1148247&viewfull=1#post1148247 )


I was actually more interested in knowing your political motivations, if any, in causing so much confusion.
No doubt you could care less what the Left or the Right are up to, but you seem to be spending a lot more time and energy screwing with the Left than with the Right these days, and I just wondered why.
Do you have a particular antipathy toward the Left nowadays?
What do you think about the WOKE movement?


I'd say it's fitting that you see yourself as having a redeeming function, as being a sort of scavenger of the human race.


https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/vulture-head-tattoo-vector-eps-41465041.jpg


So do you consider that you are serving a higher purpose (via the culling from the human population those who are not evolving)?
Buddhism says that existence is about much more than Good versus Evil, and that it's also about cycles of evolution.
In the work of the author Carlos Castaneda, the concept of the "worthy opponent" is used when referring to the evolution of a human who is intent on evolving.

My question is, are YOU really a worthy opponent? And do you spare those opponents whom you consider to be worthy?
We probably already know your answer to this, as I imagine you don't consider yourself to be evolving, but as an already perfected being.
But I think you enjoy these kinds of philosophical riddles, do you not?


https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/41YrG0p2WVL._SX331_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

UPDATE: PS SO, Satan, you can bet that lots of female Avalon members are going to be leaping to Mike's defense after his post here: https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?114958-Happy-Mother-s-Day&p=1427341&viewfull=1#post1427341
Which, I would say, was not only sincere on Mike's part, but very well played, as well.
The Unconditional Love :heart: of mothers has got to be your most unfavorite thing, and I don't imagine you like Her Day very much at all.
BTW, did you remember YOUR mother on Mother's Day?

[onawah]

Bringing this to your attention, Satan:
https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?115051-Vagina-Appreciation-Day-Lust-Based-or-Women-s-Body-Appreciation-Day--or-a-specific-part-thereof-&p=1428974&viewfull=1#post1428974
It's a thread about appreciating vaginas, but Mike deserves some appreciation from you as well for his contribution there, so I am calling you to task once again.

[Mike]

Bringing this to your attention, Satan:
https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?115051-Vagina-Appreciation-Day-Lust-Based-or-Women-s-Body-Appreciation-Day--or-a-specific-part-thereof-&p=1428974&viewfull=1#post1428974
It's a thread about appreciating vaginas, but Mike deserves some appreciation from you as well for his contribution there, so I am calling you to task once again.



Hell I wrote that post for him! He just doesn't know it yet. I do that from time to time.

But jeez, even I felt weird after that guy posted a picture of that alleged clam. So perpetuating that thread backfired on me. I'm not perfect, just almost perfect.

[onawah]

OK, so a couple of weeks ago I got a PM from either Satan or Mike which basically left me wondering what the point of the message was, because it was very, perhaps deliberately, unclear...
I cannot divulge the content of the PM according to forum rules :Avalon: but I CAN call out His Evilness and ask just what the -----he is up to now. :mmph:

(I've already asked Mike about that message but have received no response.
So I can only conclude that it was from Satan, using Mike once again as his unwitting, unconscious mouthpiece. :tsk: :nono:
And that once again, Mike had no clue that he was being used, as, in my experience, he is normally very conscientious about answering PMs.)

So please tell us, oh Evil One, what's the Deal?

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/38/Twardowski_z_diablem.jpg

Are you sadly in need of some attention now?

https://ctl.s6img.com/society6/img/rpietEmGWgz1PUjyOztOlYTOAPw/w_700/prints/~artwork/s6-0034/a/15966542_13900649/~~/sad-satan-prints.jpg

Was that a call for help?
Or a final farewell?
Have you found a new host (or hostess) to bedevil?

https://ca-times.brightspotcdn.com/dims4/default/110e854/2147483647/strip/true/crop/3413x1920+0+0/resize/1486x836!/quality/90/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fcalifornia-times-brightspot.s3.amazonaws.com%2F93%2Fd4%2F3695c5c64ec5a4887f855adbf32f%2Fla-et-match-ad-satan-dates-2020-378.JPG

It would seem you have been quite busy elsewhere, at least...

https://thumbs-prod.si-cdn.com/Ryl-qdIqFRF0Ji0CCApT0i6PWoE=/fit-in/1600x0/filters:focal(1498x1712:1499x1713)/https://public-media.si-cdn.com/filer/72/d3/72d3d37f-8b91-4eaf-bc60-cdb005885134/-ill_paint_the_town_red-_political_cartoon_1885.jpg

You have had a long run here on the forum since the inception of the thread "I am the True Jesus" which apparently you simply could not resist and which brought you here in the first place, presumably.
We know you like a big audience, and you got one here
.
https://www.adweek.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/football-match-made-hell-PAGE-2020-600x315.jpg

Are you looking for greener pastures?
Or are you thinking about retiring altogether ? (We can only hope!! :nod: )

I don't think it's your style to just fade quietly away, but this long silence is getting suspicious. :sherlock:
So come on now, don't be coy, come clean for once!!

[Mike]

Nat I hope my pm cleared up matters. At the moment I appear to be free of any Satanic influence...unless of course Satan is influencing me to say what I'm saying now. But I don't think he is. Then again, he could have influenced me to say that too. But I doubt it. I think...

I haven't done or said anything needlessly cruel in some time. I still like to hang up on people though in the middle of phone conversations, particularly when they seem very animated and talky and excited. I allow them to gain momentum, build up to a kind of crescendo, and then....click. I hang up. My friends (both of them) have a tendency to just talk, talk, talk, so they don't notice initially. Sometimes, they tell me, they'll keep talking for a good 30, 40 seconds before they realize I've hung up. This gives me great joy.

Why?, you may be wondering. Well, my friends harass me with phone calls constantly. I usually don't answer. But they keep calling anyway. Doesn't matter the time. They'll keep calling. Relentlessly. It's astounding. They're kind of annoyed that I'm not picking up so it's their way of getting back at me, in some sense. It's a little game we play.

In the event I do pick up, I'm quickly reminded why I usually don't. My friends love to complain about their boredom. It's remarkable. They go on and on about it. And then they say the same things about their jobs, girlfriends, and so on. Same conversation, every time. Usually I say very little. But even when I attempt to say something, these fools barely notice. They just talk right over me. Even when I say I have to go..they simply pretend like I didn't just say it and continue talking. It's really something.

So, in response, I've developed this habit of hanging up on them without warning. I'll also fart into the phone occasionally. My friend Mike will call me and offer the same complaints about his girlfriend, over and over and over. And, unfailingly, he will say the following after reciting all these complaints: "If she does it one more time, I'm leaving!" You'd think a kind of baseline pride would prevent him from continuing to say that, but it doesn't. He's said it dozens of times. So now, when he says that, I take my phone and place it next to my ass and push with all my might to manufacture a fart. And then I hang up.

It's the only logical response to such lunacy. But it's hardly evil. I think my evil days are behind me.

So, this thread, as far as I'm concerned, has reached its natural death. I will not fart or hang up on anyone who posts on it, but I likely won't respond either. Mike has spoken

[Patient]

Lol! I can relate to a person that calls and calls - then tries to keep you online while they have nothing to say really. Then they talk to other people while keeping me on the phone so it is easy to see that they want to show both parties that they have friends!

I have learned to really appreciate the "speaker" button. I can put the phone down and continue to do whatever it is I need to do while the party on the other end talks away!

Then there is another person who calls, ends the conversation but forgets to hang up on his end. Some odd moments have come from that. Lol!

[onawah]

Well, good to know, Mike.
However, if Satan appears again on this thread with more smart-alecky remarks :sarcastic: (which, however, aren't that different from you own a lot of the time, so it can be difficult to tell the difference... ) I promise to PM and let you know.
I hope your new supplement regimen keeps His Satanic Majesty at bay, like the apple a day keeps the doctor away.
You know, you could save yourself lot of time and effort by purchasing a fart cushion, which makes the noise for you.
Then you wouldn't have to strain or wait until you've got enough hot air built up.
(Better than being a human Whoopie Cushion...)
https://s7.orientaltrading.com/is/image/OrientalTrading/VIEWER_ZOOM/mens-whoopie-cushion-costume~mc1437
But it sounds like you're perfecting the art, and such a short cut might interfere with your creative genius!

[Mashika]

Well, good to know, Mike.
However, if Satan appears again on this thread with more smart-alecky remarks :sarcastic: (which, however, aren't that different from you own a lot of the time, so it can be difficult to tell the difference... ) I promise to PM and let you know.
I hope your new supplement regimen keeps His Satanic Majesty at bay, like the apple a day keeps the doctor away.
You know, you could save yourself lot of time and effort by purchasing a fart cushion, which makes the noise for you.
Then you wouldn't have to strain or wait until you've got enough hot air built up.
(Better than being a human Whoopie Cushion...)
https://s7.orientaltrading.com/is/image/OrientalTrading/VIEWER_ZOOM/mens-whoopie-cushion-costume~mc1437
But it sounds like you're perfecting the art, and such a short cut might interfere with your creative genius!

An apple a day, keeps MikeSatan away...Green or red Apple, i wonder... :P

[Strat]

My friends (both of them)

Your coy posts don't fool me. Your self deprecating behavior is like Usain Bolt complaining that he's not fast enough. My psychic powers tell me you're actually a really fun and cool person. We both know it quit lying. I don't meet internet people, I can count on one hand how many folks here I'd like to meet in person but you're on top of that list. Unless like wondering or runningdeer or the Captain is around.. You know what I'm saying.

Funny cause you're a couple hours away and yet I'm still too lazy to make that drive. Hell, it's probably for the best. I can't imagine good would come from The Joker hanging out with Tyler Durden.

[Mike]

My friends (both of them)

Your coy posts don't fool me. Your self deprecating behavior is like Usain Bolt complaining that he's not fast enough. My psychic powers tell me you're actually a really fun and cool person. We both know it quit lying. I don't meet internet people, I can count on one hand how many folks here I'd like to meet in person but you're on top of that list. Unless like wondering or runningdeer or the Captain is around.. You know what I'm saying.

Funny cause you're a couple hours away and yet I'm still too lazy to make that drive. Hell, it's probably for the best. I can't imagine good would come from The Joker hanging out with Tyler Durden.


The friend thing is mostly by choice...I think, lol

I have maybe 4 or 5 close friends, to be perfectly honest(not counting people I've met on the forum over the years). They live all over the country, except one who lives in Tampa. We get together maybe once or twice a month. It's the longest hour and 45 minute drive in history. It feels like 3 hours.

You can probably relate to this: I've been isolated for so long due to this heart thing I have going on, that I've been kind of a shut in. I mean, I go to work and to the grocery store and so forth, but there's little energy left for much else. It's improving though, so I try to stay hopeful. I'm back in the gym, getting in shape, and that makes me feel good.

I wouldn't say I'm lonely though. I have bouts of it, sometimes, but over time you adjust. You get used to it. You adapt. And for better or worse, you kind of prefer your own company eventually. Im much more bored than lonely I'd say. I dunno..As I'm feeling better I'm desiring more action and interaction, so maybe I'll be different in a few months or something. Hard to say.

Dude we're definitely gonna connect at some point. Durden and Satan must meet. The universe demands it.

[Strat]

You can probably relate to this: I've been isolated for so long due to this heart thing I have going on, that I've been kind of a shut in.

Ain't it so much fun explaining this to strangers? Yeah, I hear you.


Dude we're definitely gonna connect at some point. Durden and Satan must meet. The universe demands it.

Fly Molech, hide in the shadows. The boys are back in town.

https://cdna.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/022/148/006/4k/ivailo-ivanov-tyler-durden2.jpg?1574281975

[Innocent Warrior]

https://cgcthetruthcentre.com/wp-content/uploads/sermons/2020/11/GOOD-BYE-SATAN-scaled.jpg

[Patient]

You can probably relate to this: I've been isolated for so long due to this heart thing I have going on, that I've been kind of a shut in.

Ain't it so much fun explaining this to strangers? Yeah, I hear you.


Dude we're definitely gonna connect at some point. Durden and Satan must meet. The universe demands it.

Fly Molech, hide in the shadows. The boys are back in town.

https://cdna.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/022/148/006/4k/ivailo-ivanov-tyler-durden2.jpg?1574281975

For real - too bad I am a way up here from wherever you guys are, because I am sure that it would be an unforgettable time to spend in the company of you two!

And then there is the border thing - I hate going through customs! Lol!

[Chester]

I hadn't planned on revealing my true identity ..but that cretinous, sorry excuse for a nemesis has stubbornly set up camp in my jurisdiction, despite all my territorial piss squirts and scat piles. There goes the bloody neighborhood (no pun intended...I haven't killed anyone in a while, actually).

The truth is, I smelt him coming from a galaxy away. It was like getting olfactorily b!tch-slapped. He came riding a glowing wave of white light, with leonine locks of glistening hair swept off his tan forehead..reeking of fresh linens and fabric softener and wood shavings. He arrived on earth a bit too dramatically for my tastes...sort of like a gymnast who has nailed a complicated landing. He offered a smug, sanctimonious grin to men and beast alike, shamelessly inviting our adoration. Wasn't that wonderful, he seemed to say? Aren't *I* wonderful?

Salvation? Pah! The man couldn't even control his own bladder! The serpents were the first to notice a curious dark stain on the groin area of his robe..and after announcing it to the mammals, word got back to Christ and he condemned those slithery little gossipers to what your legends call a "garden" but was really just a compost pile filled with rotting veggies and semen-stained leaves from the naked homeless couple that were living there at the time. They'd recently been booted from their cave for failing to pay the rent. The man looked especially desperate so I offered him an apple for his soul, and the idiot agreed. I have it trapped in a glass cage near my 9th chakra.. and his sad, pitiful, astral face remains perpetually smashed against it, watching it horror as I tempt his dumb wife, night after night. Your history has got it all backwards.

I AM the true Satan. Oh, do I seem too frivolous for you? Too Silly? Eternity will do that to you! When faced with timelessness, there is really nothing left to do but f#ck with you idiots. Stop trying to find deep meanings in all of it!!! No, you weren't "chosen", ok?...in the spirit of collegiality I'll confess to being behind that grey-alien meme. And they're not "aliens" anyway...they're merely petulant children gone rogue. Sure, I spawned them, but here's the kicker - they're half-human..all thanks to that horny adulteress at the compost pile. That's why women will eternally suffer menstrual cycles by the way. That's one thing your traditional Christians got right - it's a punishment...never mind the expedient fellow who lobotomized his soul for the apple and lost his ability to protect her properly. See, justice was never God's strong suit. The first few pages of genesis testify to that. And he passed his hypocriticism onto Junior...his recent thread provides the evidence!

At least I got kicked out of heaven for attempting something ambitious! Junior was basically kicked out for not taking out the trash and neglecting to make his bed. He spun the whole "savior" story out of embarrassment.. it's high level of grandiosity only betrays his level of shame and humiliation.

Think I'm lying? Making this all up? Ridicule me, I dare you. At best you'll have a dream of a guttoral, backwards-sounding-record-voice repeating disturbing mantras to highjack your soul frequency. At worst, I'll manifest as a hag in a striped sweater, sucking your spirit essence out thru your luminous egg whilst smiling at you creepily throughout your entire 5 hour sleep paralysis. I have pretty bad breath too, by the way.

I hate you all, but I am available for questions...mostly because I hate christ more and want to steal a bit of his thunder. Dad's been neglecting him for a while now, and with his birthday coming up, the absence of paternal attention is making him nostalgic and mawkish. Don't feel bad for him though, it's all ego. It's all ego for me too, but i readily confess it..and there's something to be said for that.

Ah, this is liberating! I was sick of pretending to be that Mike fellow, funny and brilliant as he was.

So go on, ask away. Don't be shy. I am Satan and I am at your service, but not for long! I can only hold form here for a short period of time..at which point Mike will take over and recall none of this..he therefore cannot be responsible for anything said from this point on.....

I was once a "resident" in a psychiatric facility where I had the great pleasure (and opportunity) to meet three Jesuses. This was quite confusing because, at that time (and I was only 22), I had been concerned that I might be Jesus too! But the best part of this story was that one day, all three Jesuses were in the small lounge where sat another "resident" who was certain, and in the most calm and accepting way, that he was Satan.

I just couldn't help the opportunity to "stir the pot" and so I led the three Jesuses into a discussion as to who was the real Jesus. All the while, the resident Satan was enjoying the discussion which soon became quite heated. Imagine watching three people argue over who's the real Jesus while knowing you are actually the real Jesus?

Eventually, the discussion turned into a shouting match (of which I instigated) and gained the attention of some of the male staff who rushed in to break up the row (sending each to their rooms). A brief investigation led to the truth... that I had started it all and I was restricted back to the unit for a week or so. Yet thereafter, each time I saw the resident Satan, he smiled in a way that reflected amusement, appreciation and knowing.

It was that day I realized I wasn't just Jesus. I was "a satan" too!

Hopefully that explains it all well enough.

Psychosis is not psychosis until others suspect you are psychotic. In other words, only when others get worried you've gone psychotic, are you officially psychotic. IMO we are all unofficially psychotic just for being anchored in this lovely 5 sense consensus reality... but what do I know?

[Mark (Star Mariner)]

I was once a "resident" in a psychiatric facility where I had the great pleasure (and opportunity) to meet three Jesuses. This was quite confusing because, at that time (and I was only 22), I had been concerned that I might be Jesus too! But the best part of this story was that one day, all three Jesuses were in the small lounge where sat another "resident" who was certain, and in the most calm and accepting way, that he was Satan.

I feel really bad for laughing at that. The predicament you found yourself in is no laughing matter, but "three Jesuses meet Satan in the common room..." is just absolute comedy gold right there!

So glad you made a full recovery and could share that anecdote with us :)

[Chester]

I was once a "resident" in a psychiatric facility where I had the great pleasure (and opportunity) to meet three Jesuses. This was quite confusing because, at that time (and I was only 22), I had been concerned that I might be Jesus too! But the best part of this story was that one day, all three Jesuses were in the small lounge where sat another "resident" who was certain, and in the most calm and accepting way, that he was Satan.

I feel really bad for laughing at that. The predicament you found yourself in is no laughing matter, but "three Jesuses meet Satan in the common room..." is just absolute comedy gold right there!

So glad you made a full recovery and could share that anecdote with us :)

The story continues in real time...

Just prior to making the post you replied to, Star Mariner - I made this post (https://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?113263-The-many-side-effects-of-the-Covid-vaccine&p=1449724#post1449724)

I ended that post with this -


Starting the previous Friday (day 4 of treatments), I began to experience what I now suspect is what is referred to as "dreamtime." This continued up through last night. This experience seems quite dependent upon many factors, but the most important appears to be "getting as close to 8 or more hours of sleep." Last night I only got 6.5 hours and so perhaps this stretch of five solid days of "dreamtime" is over, at least for now.

What do I mean by dreamtime? My subtle reality experience seems blended in an amazing way with this "real world" experience almost as if they are all one overall type of experience. This has also included my "sleep time" where I am having dreams all night, waking many times yet drifting right back into sleep... So in essence I have experienced this blending in both my waking state and when sleeping. It is filled with impossible synchronicities where my contemplations become manifest in the "real world."

Just moments ago I received the following text -

47376

I had not had interaction with Dr. Unterberg since 2012 with one exception - I had made a promise to Dr. Untergerg that I would make good on an old bill that was associated with my ex-wife and mother of my children. I was able to get the bill paid and so I contacted Dr. Unterberg about this in June of this year and by mid July, the bill was paid.

Who is Dr. Unterberg? He was my administrative doctor at Timberlawn Psychiatric Hospital where and when the "lounge" incident occurred.

Now consider the other post and the section I quoted above... where I wondered if my curtailed night of sleep might spell the end of the 'dreamtime' experience that has been ongoing over the last five days.

His text to me (in the image above) demonstrates that, "no, it did not."

My two posts and the arrival of his text took place all within a single hour and one minute. This is an example of 'dreamtime' manifesting and leaving an artifact.

Full blown hyper quantum synchronicity (as I call it).

[Strat]

I was once a "resident" in a psychiatric facility where I had the great pleasure (and opportunity) to meet three Jesuses. This was quite confusing because, at that time (and I was only 22), I had been concerned that I might be Jesus too!

This reminds me of an old Howard Stern episode where two Jesuses came into a screaming match. Also I watched a documentary on Bellevue Mental Hospital and they said something to the effect of what you said. "A man just came in, he was eating pages of the Bible and claiming to be Jesus... Problem is we have a few other Jesuses here.

Dude, next time just say you identify as Jesus.

[onawah]

Mike is still on sabbatical apparently, so it may be awhile before we get his take (or Satan's) on any of the new comments.
He likes to illustrate his sabbatical status on his profile page with a "Gone Fishing" sign.
Which might be ironic considering the kind of wet weather they may be experiencing in Florida this month.

[Chester]

I miss Mike (but I think he's back!)

[onawah]

Mike is back, but I'm not sure if Satan is around...

I miss Mike (but I think he's back!)