The twilight of my enlightenment

[thepainterdoug]

In the beginning of my opening up and my journey into questioning things, I believed I was discovering great info as to why things didn't make sense to me. JFK was probably my first big shock and awakening as a young adult.  

This of course following my youth when I discovered that professional wrestling was not real.  It was fake. I scratched my head thinking, how could everyone not know ?  Don't they see it ?And how could grown adults permit this?  I'm being taught in school and church to be one way ,while this is what adults are ok with doing?

And from JFK, to then seeing Oswald shot live on TV , to all the assassinations, MLK etc then questioning the Moon missions and on we go into Vietnam, the Wars,the USS Liberty, 911,  the School shootings , Boston Bombing, Sandy Hook and on and on, whether these events were real , partially real or completely contrived, I seemed to have a nose for things that just didn't add up. We all know what that got labeled as

Then enter the UFO issue, and my seeing and documenting many of my own, I found myself sitting in a space not too many around me were. And now the Virus. I Cannot stand seeing the name so you know which one I mean.

And even if I concede that, yes this or that is real,I found it through deep scrutiny, not just nodding my head yes to the official story. And even after conceding that something was probably true, If I saw something that didn't add up, I would ask myself, why not? It should make sense, and yet it doesn't. What's wrong here?

So through the years, this awareness has directed my life through my callings, the Arts music and my social decisions in general. 
Discovering and sharing this info and discoveries were fascinating for me, much at the chagrin of various friends and family members.But many had open minds and were at least open enough to hear me out and see my presentations. That was back then

This has all ended now.  In 2020, the climate has drastically changed.  Censorship is analogous to 1939 book burning as fake news, be it real or not, is all seen as fake news for the viewers comfort and support of their world view.   Just dismiss it.  It's fake.  
If someone now has compelling evidence something is fishy, it's ignored as fake, if It challenges comfort zones and agendas, it's fake.
I cannot even send anything out to my friends anymore unless they are already in 99% agreement with me in the first place.  So no point in that as just a few of us preach to the Choir.

I have lost my desire to share, to discuss with others who are unaware or of an opposite view.  There is nothing to be gained. No one will yield. Everyone is armed with their fake news, and their experts. Russian bots and foreign collusion, fake videos, fake pictures, fake emails,  fake everything .No one will listen, no one wants to know.
Little did Pro Wrestling's Vince McMahon realize how visionary his world of "fake" would become so many years later

I'm in the twilight of my enlightenment, pertaining to sharing socially and expanding collectively.
I'm entering a new journey inward, deeply inward.  I'm solitary on this journey . Not alone

dauld 11/2020

[Karen (Geophyz)]

When I start feeling this way I go back and listen to this: http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?112531-Have-I-told-you-lately-that-I-love-you-by-Van-Morrison.---Cover--by-Glenn-Brace-in-Australia.

For some reason the soothing tone of Glenn playing this song makes me realize that if I talk to people and make one person think it is all worth it. We cannot give up!

[Sue (Ayt)]

It almost feels like a spell has been cast over some of my loved ones.
:(
(yet I love them anyway)

[thepainterdoug]

Yes Sue, a spell. Thats what makes me think its cosmic.

[wondering]

I counted about 5 or 6 people as true friends maybe 5 years ago. One has developed dementia and cannot be visited in her care facility due to Covid. My husband became totally dependent due to spinal damage following a flu shot, which I’ve mentioned here before, so my time for interaction and socialization dropped dramatically. One of my friends of 50+ years, who lives out of state, can’t bear to think our government had any hand in 911. One friend has asked me to stop sending her articles on Covid,etc. because she just can’t deal with it. I’ve taken a little break from one friend who doesn’t get why I might not enjoy hearing the details of her trips with her girlfriends... My point is just that isolation and shifting interests among us all has wreaked havoc on any support system I used to have. I have never before had to rely so completely on a belief in what is unseen and the process I am in of evolution and enlightenment. This is probably not too clear, but I felt Doug’s angst, and it brought up my own. I think the journey inward is all there is.

[thepainterdoug]

Thanks Wondering. Tonight, election night, I have , correct or not, already conceded the reality of things, and feel good, feel energized and empowered.
Any one, all of you, consider me your friend. e mail doug@dougauld.com

[haroldsails]

Wondering is right, "turning inward is all there is". My personal experience is a closing up. The taking of sides (polarization). I have long time friends I can no longer be candid with, I worry about alienating friends and family. Inward is safe, and there is so much to learn reading. If I were religious I might venture there, but I'm not. I have started to look at the ancient story's of the Hermetica - Sumer- Greece - Egypt. Looking for a place to plug in and grow. It is a solitary pursuit, no personal friends or family seem interested. At this point in life (75) I feel I am disconnecting from current events whatever they are.

[East Sun]

Hi Doug
Thanks for the invite, At this late time in my life I am not worthy of a friend
like you but I do really appreciate your humor on the forum.

[rgray222]

Life is always a struggle because there is so much we don't know. If you have never searched for truth or enlightenment (different meaning for everyone) you probably go through life either numb or blissfully ignorant. That would be a wasted life. The thought of struggling alone seems unpleasant and can leave some with a great deal of anxiety. Once you really begin to understand that the journey is meant to be taken alone it becomes an easier task. It is normal to seek out like-minded people in an effort to validate our findings, our truths but it is not necessary and may not even be the best way to arrive at the destination. There is always good in the struggle and good in the truth - sometimes it bumps into you and other times you must seek it out but it is always there. I am more convinced every day that the answers we seek about virtually everything lie within.

[thepainterdoug]

east sun, im not happy to hear you say that. anyhow, door is always open

¤=[Post Update]=¤

rgray222, well said. it took me a while , but we have time

[Strat]

That was a very articulate OP Doug, really well written. Maybe not totally, but we're very much on the same wavelength. I'd love to share a drink with you one day and hear more of your story and your thoughts.


This has all ended now.  In 2020, the climate has drastically changed.  Censorship is analogous to 1939 book burning as fake news, be it real or not, is all seen as fake news for the viewers comfort and support of their world view.   Just dismiss it.  It's fake.  
If someone now has compelling evidence something is fishy, it's ignored as fake, if It challenges comfort zones and agendas, it's fake.
I cannot even send anything out to my friends anymore unless they are already in 99% agreement with me in the first place.  So no point in that as just a few of us preach to the Choir.

I have lost my desire to share, to discuss with others who are unaware or of an opposite view.  There is nothing to be gained. No one will yield. Everyone is armed with their fake news, and their experts. Russian bots and foreign collusion, fake videos, fake pictures, fake emails,  fake everything .No one will listen, no one wants to know.
Little did Pro Wrestling's Vince McMahon realize how visionary his world of "fake" would become so many years later

Did you just now come to this realization? I would love to see how this affects your art. I have a friend who was a decent artist and often enjoyed shows until he became happy lol. He settled down with a nice gal and stopped painting almost immediately. So it's interesting to me to see what drives art.

I have a very strange tie to artists.. My mother is one, my first love was one, my best friend is one, they seem to find their way to me. Ironically my mind is more mathematical than it is artistic.


I am not worthy of a friend like you
I don't know you but I don't believe this for a second. Doug said it himself in another post (though I'm butchering his quote surely), "We assign value as we see fit." If he sent you a friend request then he weighed you as a valuable friend.

To each their own though it's none of my business.

[Sadieblue]

I too have tried to share with others, I might get in for a couple minutes, then they always
want to change the subject to the mundane, so then they have lost me, just as I have lost them. So like Doug, I have just about given up on sharing what I have learned and know. Kind of sad isn't it, most around me just don't seem to have the time to even have a decent conversation, they are to busy with their smart phones, and watching tic toc.

[chocolate milk]

The world is not life, life is life.

People tend to form their minds around events of the world because it is believed it has authority over us. That is a lie that is only real when we live it. It’s never true. Like a cult we’re born into with its ever increasing grip over its members, a grip that becomes so oppressive that the believers inevitably devolve into unconscious sycophants.

Those of us awake to the true nature of the cult tend to believe we are not a member because we can see, while all we truly manage to achieve is correct observation of a lie that we continue to live.

It’s not until one sees the true nature of the world as a reality constructed by a system of thought that a cult member can truly leave. The condition of this world is false, destructive and full of suffering. It can be lived in truth and the result would be a constructive condition in which human beings could be free to thrive, but only if human beings were to always remain aware of the true nature of the reality. At its best it’s a beautiful lie.

Human beings were always going to come to a place where we became aware of the true extent of our creative power so we could learn to be responsible with it. The capacity of the destruction that technology of the 20th century gave us has forced us here, and here we are.

Beyond the world is truth. Beyond the world is life. Life created this world and life can create a better world. Once the cult is left the deep, deep sadness begins to lift and in its place a peace from acceptance arises and we can begin to see life for what it is. We see the world for what it is.

There are few things I know and I often don’t know what to believe these days but I know what humanity is and I trust that. I know what divinity is and I trust that.

The ability to perceive with the awareness of the role of thought in creating wolds is necessary to live free, to use thought instead of being used through thought.

From this place beyond the cult we have the clarity to see who we can be for our fellow human beings. We have so much more to offer than correct observations. We are light. It’s not fancy or loud but in the darkest places it’s true value will be undeniable. Beyond the cult love is felt for our fellow human beings, regardless of differences or conditions.

[thepainterdoug]

strat/ thank you. I have come to it in its time. its been coming. and I voiced it now cause I feel its now realized.

sadie blue, thank you as well and I feel what you feel.

chocolate milk, maybe its late for me but i dont quite understand exactly what your saying. i think i do, but not sure. perhaps you could put it a different way?

and regarding east sun, and everyone, it would be most disappointing for me to think that anyone would ever think they are not good enough to be my friend. were a family

[Agape]

Dough, I’ve got to the same space while ago but also repeatedly through out my life as long as I remember. In that “space” the most important things are allowed to happen, personal evolution, clear views, recovery and renaissance.

I’ve not seen anytime in my life time any sort of benefit from people’s games, arguments, political debates, wars and “deciphering the deception” of “it all”.
It doesn’t help to take us forwards or anywhere.
It “sounds interesting” but is mostly utter waste of time, energy and resources.

I firmly believe in Life beyond the duality of argument has 99% chance of making beautiful contribution to our past, presence and future.

Cutting ones awareness off the lure of competitive freaks and “who’s the best” is not easy, they have singled some of us in toddler age really, the time we outsmarted them innocently and they’re after us since
like enraged dogs, provoking conflict.

So many people took this lesson in human history and retreated from public activities better than that, left to live pure and solitary life in the woods.

It’s a pity and shame of humanity that the wiser and altogether smarter people are either ignored, bullied or fought against and those with limited minds and objectives take over instead playing in their sand pits.
Even while we are standing against deeper humanitarian crisis most governments and their experts still cover national interests better than facts and their strategic games rather than genuine progress in making better relationships.


Look at it from the larger perspective though: this human world has always been somewhat like this but there is lots of Life and truths to go for Out There.

May our minds be able to leave this human prison behind ..


🌟

[Craig]

Life is always a struggle because there is so much we don't know. If you have never searched for truth or enlightenment (different meaning for everyone) you probably go through life either numb or blissfully ignorant. That would be a wasted life.

As an ill informed devil's advocate, if we are eternal beings on the merry-go-round of reincarnation can anything be called a wasted life? I ask this from a rather circuitous route because I often grapple with thoughts about critically ill children who only live for a short time, or children born into the worst poverty imaginable - was it just pot luck that the soul occupied that body? Or if it is all a 'game' and we recycle through this, eventually we will be one of these? I have also been having some really weird thoughts of the idea of free will v reincarnation and if i could articulate it I would make a post of it, but I digress as usual, I'll leave with this, if we are all one experiencing a this particular facet of creation - how can we be anything but alone?

[Savannah]

We have all realized that when we went down the rabbit whole, took the red pill etc. we would experience separation and loss of connection with the mainstream. It can be lonely and people loose friends and family. However I think what your implying Doug is that it’s worse now than in the recent past. If I’m correct in that assumption?

So I’m going to get a little woo woo on this one. I was thinking the other day that perhaps this is part of the great awakening, Revelations, The Law of One Harvest, The pole shift/micro Nova or Yuga cycle change (add one here). In that people are now holding a very firm solid perspective/belief and are resistant to others waning to change that , even as you say when facts are used. Certainly it can be argued that “they” used and manipulated facts to the point where people gave up on logic and facts. However I see it may go beyond that and people don’t care about facts and have an aversion to people trying to change them. People holding such diverse beliefs may result in vibrational mismatch and separation of the herd so to speak. That may explain how the harvest, assentation or Rapture might work. It may be those who remain on an organic path raise their vibration. Those who choose AI, vaccines and smart cities stay in 3D. So it may not matter if you die with million friends sitting at your wake or alone and buried in potters field, your soul goes where it vibrationaly fits. I’m not going to try and convince them anymore but like them, I’m going to hold my ground. I have not been tested yet, I can only say I will not get the vaccine but if I’m starving, threatened by losing my home, job etc will I still stand firm? Only time will tell.

[thepainterdoug]

CRAIG, the idea of a wasted life doesnt work for me. I believe we cannot know the complexity of this reality we all seem to be living. Nothing is wasted , no life is wasted. I get most of my recent thoughts on this by studying OBE,s and Robert Monroes books on OBE.

Savannah. Thanks. Yes its worse for ME now. Doesnt mean its true for others. but many may agree with me. And yes it may be how the rapture plays out. And I will not get a vaccine as well. But its a matter of how hard it is pushed. Dont want to win a battle and loose the war

[amor]

You are not alone Doug; we share a soul link.

[East Sun]

Life is always a struggle because there is so much we don't know. If you have never searched for truth or enlightenment (different meaning for everyone) you probably go through life either numb or blissfully ignorant. That would be a wasted life.

As an ill informed devil's advocate, if we are eternal beings on the merry-go-round of reincarnation can anything be called a wasted life? I ask this from a rather circuitous route because I often grapple with thoughts about critically ill children who only live for a short time, or children born into the worst poverty imaginable - was it just pot luck that the soul occupied that body? Or if it is all a 'game' and we recycle through this, eventually we will be one of these? I have also been having some really weird thoughts of the idea of free will v reincarnation and if i could articulate it I would make a post of it, but I digress as usual, I'll leave with this, if we are all one experiencing a this particular facet of creation - how can we be anything but alone?

My guess is that babes enter and may exit soon after but it does not matter, They go on as we have gone on
and will again finally clicking onto what is right for us.

I would not worry about baby's dying as they re incarnate whenever, instantly or in a thousand years,
time that is not linear in other time lines.


y

[East Sun]

We have all realiz
been tested yet, I can only say I will not get the vaccine but if I’m starving, threatened by losing my home, job etc will I still stand firm? Only time will tell.

I feel the same. I hope that if i am confronted at gun point I will say "Pull the trigger, you bastards" < but I might not even have the chance to say that. Yes, now I say it and I will not chicken out. Even if it does not change anything, I am determined to stay
with what I believe.

[East Sun]

In the beginning his world of "fake" would become so many years later

I'm in the twilight of my enlightenment, pertaining to sharing socially and expanding collectively.
I'm entering a new journey inward, deeply inward.  I'm solitary on this journey . Not alone

dauld 11/2020

I'm so glad to finally be able to talk with people who are on the same page, and not be given the cold shoulder
or much worse.
I know I still have to confront others of opposing views.

I only have semi-friends/acquaintances, and that's ok and I have to thread gently so as to not offend.
They put up with me knowing I don't agree with them. No point in arguing with them at this point.

I have for 30 years given subtle indications or told outright to my brothers what I had learned
with nothing but ridicule.

We are at a crossroads and can expect face much worse in the final onslaught coming our way.
We are together as one.

[rgray222]

Life is always a struggle because there is so much we don't know. If you have never searched for truth or enlightenment (different meaning for everyone) you probably go through life either numb or blissfully ignorant. That would be a wasted life.

As an ill informed devil's advocate if we are eternal beings on the merry-go-round of reincarnation can anything be called a wasted life? I ask this from a rather circuitous route because I often grapple with thoughts about critically ill children who only live for a short time, or children born into the worst poverty imaginable - was it just pot luck that the soul occupied that body? Or if it is all a 'game' and we recycle through this, eventually we will be one of these? I have also been having some really weird thoughts of the idea of free will v reincarnation and if i could articulate it I would make a post of it, but I digress, as usual, I'll leave with this if we are all one experiencing a this particular facet of creation - how can we be anything but alone?

I completely understand where you're coming from. These same thoughts have occupied my mind for a long time. Why is someone born into an inescapable war-torn poverty-stricken country, while others are born into so-called privilege? I believe we choose the life we are born into, whether it be a young child with a terminal illness or a life of luxury and excess. In some respects, our free will was exercised before we ever arrived.

Once we arrive into the framework that we established, we live within the broad strokes of that life exercising free will to utilise "it" in a way that benefits ourselves, family, friends and society. Sometimes the purpose of the life we have decided to live is simply to bring purpose and understanding to others. For example, the young child that dies from an accident or terminal illness at an early age impacts multiple lives that he or she is connected to for his/her short time on earth. That life may have been filled with purpose.

For a long time, I used to believe that no life was ever wasted regardless of how it is used. I no longer believe that to be the case. I don't think it makes any difference if you are born into terrible hardships or into a life of privilege. If you can't find goodness or love in your heart, if you keep fighting the war, feeding the addiction or living in a hedonistic way you are wasting your life and you are destined to repeat it.

Of course, all life does have some meaning but if we don't prospect for that meaning we are lost souls. My belief is that the reincarnation merry-go-round has a purpose and an end.
R

[Vicus]

Hello thepainterdoug, i undertand your feelings , i m there too.

A couple years ago i find something reveiling to me, it explains the why …
Maybe some people here new that or the infomation is some where in Avalon tresure,
i dont have time to search…

it is about why people cant see the truth.

https://truthandvibration.com/blogs/paradigm-shift/understanding-the-nine-veils-of-illusion

[wondering]

This is fascinating, referring to the video from Vicus...probably over my head, but fascinating. I am very interested in what my much trusted fellow Avalonians take is on this.

[Craig]

What a awesome thread.

I hope when the time in right I can depart this dimension with love and courage and hopefully allowing for growth in others

[Baby Steps]

Trying to disengage from the baying and hubbub of the crowds of people engaging each other in a adversarial way.

Stepping back , not caring to join in, or feeling a need to try and help is a sign of growth.

That disengagement is really a recognition that there is a growth process going on but swimming in that disturbed ocean may not be beneficial or pleasant.


I try to disengage, I tell myself that I have no need or desire to assist others with their worldview or perceptual models, its not my job. Then examine why or what tugs one back in to the melee?

Ah, its the ' what they think about me' problem, or the 'why dont they get what I am saying' problem.

Leave them to it. Onwards and upwards.

[Did You See Them]

I too feel like I've given up and become more reclusive and less likely to share my thoughts.
I listen now, without adding to discussions as my ideas and experiences fall outside what "they" want to hear.
All seems fake and poorly thought through ( like Doug's wrestling- so obvious )

As jimi hendrix said "the world is nothing but a gimick" !

[thepainterdoug]

THANKS EVERYONE for your participation. I will try to better read each comment. I tend to put a thumbs up on each one just to say I see you!! Bill, we need an I see you button aside from agreement, non agreement! But Im sure you have enough to do.

Perhaps the takeaway is that we are all being pushed, encouraged or confirming necessary growth. And growth IS inward.

EAST SUN SAID/ I'm so glad to finally be able to talk with people who are on the same page, and not be given the cold shoulder
or much worse.

East Sun, What do you get when you show up late for dinner at Jeffrey Dhamers house? The cold shoulder Joke Joke!

[Vicus]

Hello thepainterdoug, i undertand your feelings , i m there too.

A couple years ago i find something reveiling to me, it explains the why …
Maybe some people here new that or the infomation is some where in Avalon tresure,
i dont have time to search…

it is about why people cant see the truth.

https://truthandvibration.com/blogs/paradigm-shift/understanding-the-nine-veils-of-illusion

[onawah]

In Buddhism there are two essential paths, the Mahayana, or path of the Bodhisattva, and the Theravada, or path of the Arhat.
Theoretically, the former achieves enlightenment by postponing it and vowing to save all other sentient beings before going into Nirvana, the latter focuses more on achieving enlightenment for self, and as quickly as possible.
There is something to be said for both, and I think it's likely most aspirants vacillate between the two at varying times.
( No doubt Agape would be happy to fill in more details on that theme, if asked.)
When I was actively practicing Zen meditation back in the 60s and 70s, I didn't worry too much about it, but it's an issue that has been coming up for me a lot in the last couple of years...ie feeling a loss of purpose upon realizing how unreceptive most people are to hearing hard truths about what's really going on in the world.
(But there are other ways to share wisdom such as meditation groups if you can find a good one. and there's not usually a lot of talking in such groups, so little chance of controversies springing up. )

I've found some very helpful information about reincarnation and the various stages of soul growth in the Michael Teachings: See https://www.michaelteachings.com/
Participants in this thread might want to go directly to this link: https://www.michaelteachings.com/old_soul.html

It helped me to understand something about Old Souls that was really puzzling me before as I thought Old Souls should have it all together, when actually ( according to the Teachings, and it tallies with my experience), Old Souls can often be something of a mess because they see right through so many of the illusions about this earthly plane and it can be a very disillusioning process.

As for babies dying, and the suffering of children, etc. it's very hard to fathom the philosophical question of "WHY" so much suffering on the part of innocents, but according to the Teachings, it seems that souls newly arriving on this material plane of earthly existence (what Michael calls "Infant Souls", and "Baby Souls") have a much tougher time just surviving at first because the terrain is so unfamiliar and skill sets have not been developed.
Some psychics have said that Earth is moving into a higher frequency now and that when it has arrived there, there will not be so many younger souls incarnating here.
And that one reason for so many souls being here now is because the transition of a planet to a higher dimension is a valuable experience to live through for the younger souls, which they can then bring to younger planets to help those planets through that transition when their time comes.
Of course it's all much more complicated than that no doubt, and hopefully such transitions are not as traumatic on other worlds as they are on this one, though for all we know, it may be even more so elsewhere.
So remembering Gratitude is always a good practice...:nod::flower:

[Patient]

CRAIG, the idea of a wasted life doesnt work for me. I believe we cannot know the complexity of this reality we all seem to be living. Nothing is wasted , no life is wasted. I get most of my recent thoughts on this by studying OBE,s and Robert Monroes books on OBE.

Savannah. Thanks. Yes its worse for ME now. Doesnt mean its true for others. but many may agree with me. And yes it may be how the rapture plays out. And I will not get a vaccine as well. But its a matter of how hard it is pushed. Dont want to win a battle and loose the war

Yes, I am right there with you on the vaccine thing. You are a couple years older than me, so a few of the early experiences was not as obvious to me -but we have seen some change through the years.

I have always also wanted to express (not really sure what) but something about the fact that you have followed the painting path as you have. I am really impressed by that. I went to school for animation quite a few years ago - trying to find myself a path with art. Animation requires a quick hand as they were paying by the foot of film. 24 frames per second. 2 frames per drawing on average - I was too slow so I think I was making something like $1.24/hr. :)

I am too busy for my own artwork. I need a quiet spot and need to be free of any thought that I need to be doing something else. Hard to find time like that, but I have had couple good times when I pulled off something that I was really proud of - and surprised myself. So to see the amount of work that you have done is impressive - and your style is cool. I wonder what painters do you feel have influenced you?

I had the opportunity to be in an art class in high school where Robert Bateman was teaching. (If you are not familiar with his work, have a look.) He was a normal art teacher, and me being a young teenager, he did not catch my interest - until he brought in a painting he was working on one day. It was an early one he did of wolves. The entire class looked at him with new respect. :)

Anyway - just wanted to throw a cheer out to you!

[amor]

Dear Doug: I don't know whether you paint for personal pleasure and fulfillment or whether you also do so professionally. When I was in my teens, there was little to no leisure time; but I tried to paint with Oils. It was then I realized that without a technical knowledge of how Oils behave and must be used, in every aspect, along with knowing how to draw properly, types of brushes and brush work, and so on and on, I was getting nowhere. If you have a mind to, it would be wonderful to write a detailed outline of techniques, etc., and then possibly have a video made illustrating how each is employed. I went through the mental exercise and it became voluminous and off putting. Then, I thought, why not start with painting techniques for beginners, since we are the people most likely to be interested. It can be marketed alone with your favorite paint box set, perhaps with the financial help of its manufacturer. Then, if that goes well, an expansion of "Painting for beginners in Water Colors or other mediums; painting techniques of the masters, etc. financed by the brush manufacturers. So many people would love to paint but have not a clue. Just an idea to toy with that may be financially lucrative. Never mind if it has already been tried, there are many new twists to a theme which are helpful.

Never mind the physical, and mental differences we have from those around us. If we are trapped into planning a too difficult life path before we enter this game, we will emerge wiser, if sadder. There are many such stories all around you; and I can see from your face that you are both a loving and compassionate soul.

[Agape]

I came to this paradoxical conclusion at the dawn of my day and that in this world of deceit and upon perceiving the fullness of the deceit,
as pure minded entity I’m bound to be a failure.

If every “true victory” in the eyes of the world has to be payed in blood there are no “righteous victories”.

Failing to fake my quest for truth, I have never fitted to any system or a group but I’ve seen how they work and whom they gather.
It’s not that I could not have been fitted somewhere easy- looking back to my early life I could have been anything I wished to be if I did not look for full truth and answers instead.
Likewise I failed to fake relationships, any and all relationships and I’m unable to do that which too is a failure, in the eyes of this world.


I stood at the precipice of many times and timelines in this very life, times of big changes of cultures and societies, witnessed slow exodus of some of them and emergence of bright new timeliness of future with windows of countless possibilities.

I surfed ( in live mode in matter of years) some of those timelines until new times emerged, spontaneously. On the great sea of consciousness there’s constant motion , there is no getting stuck,
people get stuck in their own mind prisons for lifetime but true nature of life is constant transformation instead.

I do not see the same boundaries some people see, in between us but I see people constantly creating their boundaries.

What’s there to win in this world ? Safe enclosure ?


I chose to experience instead, the power of life and our Minds over and above the matter. Our minds for free and its intelligence and life is boundless.


The times I stopped believing in this world completely were probably the best times I could make any use of it. The times I could get the “heartless feel” right and be little more brave than usually.

My inner feel and atmosphere is that we come here from distant worlds , full of optimism but boy we learn hard to subsidise.
We wish to discover the mystery of human life and touch the base,
upon which our consciousness passes away and transforms to nature

and part of it detaches itself from the matter
and floats back to its Mother Star.


We all come to this point we chatted about so long philosophically when we have to fully detach from the deception of worldly matters at once
and start walking “home”, barefoot.

After it happens about 1001 times , it’s eventually also going to happen for real and it’s mostly a peaceful event unless it’s “no event at all”.

Those people we “left behind” asking about the “meaning” will be there for a while yet, debating meanings.

In either case ..our true home the Light of the Spirit and sanctuary are always there for those who make some steps towards it.

And the mystery of purposes and meanings


🙏🕯💫

[Lunesoleil]

I'm in the twilight of my enlightenment, pertaining to sharing socially and expanding collectively.
I'm entering a new journey inward, deeply inward.  I'm solitary on this journey . Not alone

I would say it's part of the way, but is it the way? We change over time, what was true yesterday is no longer today.
We must give up to gain our inner freedom, the outside is only an illusion, it is our perceptions of consciousness linked to a frequency of a world that we believe to be real.
It is belonging to thought forms that create the world in which we identify ourselves.
I would say that we are in full confusion of our incarnation on this Earth.
We are all Atlantean children, we are all children of aliens, we are all children of the matrix ...

:wizard: