another bob
19th February 2012, 21:34
Greetings, Friends!
I have extracted this post of Starchild's from the thread "The Shape of Things Not Coming, Part 1", in order to address it at length. Although I had said that I was now withdrawing from the public discourse, I do feel moved to share a little more with you, in hopes that it may lighten the burden and perhaps even provide a little inspiration.
Personally, I "miss" things, because I am sick. I have been GIVEN a horrible disease called LYME, that was BREWED UP in a LAB, by our lovely leaders. I am also Targeted, by our lovely leaders. Because OUR LEADERS have us scraping pennies to get the bills paid, it is next to impossible to eat organic nourishing food, to try to feel better. I still have a roof over my head, but that is more than alot of people have. The good in the world is disappearing little by little., (actually by leaps and bounds), and we have to stand up and say enough already. People that are raising kids these days, don't have time to smell the few roses that can actually bloom in this toxic state our planet is in, because we are too busy working 3 jobs, trying to feed our family. Not everyone is able to just enjoy the ride.
My Dear Starchild,
First, let me say how I sympathize with your situation, and so am moved to respond with some examples from my life. I have two very close friends, marvellous women now in their late 60's, who have both been diagnosed with CFIDS, and have suffered this debilitating condition for a few decades now. In their prime, both were top professionals in their respective fields -- one a well-known graphic illustrator, and the other a progressive educator on the leading edge of new paradigm thinking. As the CFIDS took its toll on their immune systems and capacity to even function in the ordinary way we tend to take for granted, both were forced to become bed-bound for long stretches of time, and likewise to abandon their former exciting careers and abilities. Both had been extremely vivacious and extroverted, but with the progression of the disease, all that ebbed away. Furthemore, cardiac complications arose that required intensive medical intervention, leaving both in very difficult straits.
Of the two, one has been able to somehow triumph over her infirmities and become established in a profound sense of peace and happiness, while the other has never ceased struggling with her fate, complaining about how much she has lost, seeking one hopeful fix after another, and even spending large sums on trips to South America for questionable medical experiments. So, why do you think one is happy and the other not?
Now, closer to home, I'll use the example of my Beloved -- my Mate and Darling of my heart. At the age of 4, she was molested for the first time by her uncle. Several years later, she was again molested by her dentist. At the age of 9, she was stricken with the most severe fotrm of Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis, for which she was subjegated to the barbaric and primitive medical procedures of the time. She was forced to undergo hip replacements on both hips, which failed and needed to be re-done, necessitating months at a time of hospitalization.
During that time, she developed a rare infection called Stevens-Johnsons Syndrome, which is usually 100% fatal. Somehow, by grace, she survived being manhandled by thoughtless physicians and ridiculous treatments. The horror stories she has shared of that time would curdle your blood! Somehow, she survived, although the disease would continue to progress, rendering her nights and days a perpetual torture. She was only given aspirin, and took so much she developed a bad case of tintinitus. Once, on her way to treatment, she was abducted at knifepoint, beaten, and raped. The perp was never apprehended.
By now, she had become a "cutter", multilating herself with razors, and eventually took a large dose of pills in an attempt to end her miserable life. She was discovered and taken to the hospital, but was pronounced dead. During that time, she entered into the light, was shown the bigger picture, and sent back. Once back in the body, she remained in a coma for three days, and then made a full recovery from the poisoning.
On the basis of the nde, she plunged headlong into a deep inquiry, and although the Arthritis continued its crippling progress, she took up a form of practice called Kriya Yoga, and had many mystical experiences and was given some extraordinary realizations.
She devoted as much time as possible to the practice over the next few years, although by now she had married and birthed 2 daughters (she's actually in the medical record books as being only the second person with a double hip replacement to deliver children). Her first husband died prematurely, and she was left penniless, and eventually homelss, all the while forced to endure an ever-worsening pain situation. In fact, she was in constant agony, and yet was forced to depend on a soup kitchen for nourishment for herself and her children.
Eventually, she joined up with a couple of other poor souls and found some meager lodging. She was able to get some minimal state assistance, and attempted to go back to college, but the disease was implacable, and she was forced to drop that plan. During that time, two men abducted her at gunpoint, took her to a remote location in a van, and visciously raped her once again. This time, however, something happened. Instead of fear and revulsion, her heart melted and she instantly forgave them in the midst of the attack. She said that she felt an overwhelming love and understanding rise up in her heart, and although they had intended to kill her and dump her body, they instead drove her back and let her go free.
From there she increased her inquiry, plunging deep into her own being, and actually began using the constant agonizing pain as a prod to go deeper, until finally she underwent a profound awakening experience, in which she recognized that she was not the body, but rather, the source of all love itself. This experience was only the beginning of her spiritual transformation, and although there was no let-up from the pain, her position relative to the pain had changed, and she settled deeper and deeper into her true nature and divine condition.
When I first met her, ten years ago now, I knew instantly that she was my immortal Bleoved. We had shared many lives together, and were here now to complete something that had begun in pre-existence. I left everything immediately to be with her, including nearly a million dollars of assets. We built a cabin high in the Northern Cascade Mountain range, and undertook a period of three years of uninterrupted spiritual investigation together. I watched over time as she continued her transformation. Whatever tree or plant she touched began to blossom. I've atempted to document some of that on my photo website: http://www.pbase.com/1heart
Then I noticed birds and animals from all over would come up to be near her. As time progressed, I found that, by merely entering into her near proximity, I would be plunged into a mindless ecstasy, my kness would literally buckle, and I could hardly catch my breath. This forced me in turn to go deeper, opening myself more and more to the power of that same love, melting down one level of resistence after another, until I was able to simply embrace her physical form without passing out.
Although she has suffered more than any other human I've even known, she is now the happiest person I've ever been provileged to meet. Moreover, the innocent child-like joy she takes in even the most common things in life never ceases to delight me. Yes, she continues to suffer mightily from the deteriorating disease, sometimes moaning out in agony, and yet at the same time she will share that she has never been happier, because she knows that she is nothig but love, pure unconditional love, and that is where her true identity remains, even in the midst of unspeakable physical distress.
Well, I've rambled on quite a bit here, but I felt moved to share this with you, and with all here, to hopefully provide some understanding that, even in the midst of misery and pain, it is possible to find acceptance, and come out the other side, awake and at peace -- happy.
Thanks for your indulgence!
:yo:
I have extracted this post of Starchild's from the thread "The Shape of Things Not Coming, Part 1", in order to address it at length. Although I had said that I was now withdrawing from the public discourse, I do feel moved to share a little more with you, in hopes that it may lighten the burden and perhaps even provide a little inspiration.
Personally, I "miss" things, because I am sick. I have been GIVEN a horrible disease called LYME, that was BREWED UP in a LAB, by our lovely leaders. I am also Targeted, by our lovely leaders. Because OUR LEADERS have us scraping pennies to get the bills paid, it is next to impossible to eat organic nourishing food, to try to feel better. I still have a roof over my head, but that is more than alot of people have. The good in the world is disappearing little by little., (actually by leaps and bounds), and we have to stand up and say enough already. People that are raising kids these days, don't have time to smell the few roses that can actually bloom in this toxic state our planet is in, because we are too busy working 3 jobs, trying to feed our family. Not everyone is able to just enjoy the ride.
My Dear Starchild,
First, let me say how I sympathize with your situation, and so am moved to respond with some examples from my life. I have two very close friends, marvellous women now in their late 60's, who have both been diagnosed with CFIDS, and have suffered this debilitating condition for a few decades now. In their prime, both were top professionals in their respective fields -- one a well-known graphic illustrator, and the other a progressive educator on the leading edge of new paradigm thinking. As the CFIDS took its toll on their immune systems and capacity to even function in the ordinary way we tend to take for granted, both were forced to become bed-bound for long stretches of time, and likewise to abandon their former exciting careers and abilities. Both had been extremely vivacious and extroverted, but with the progression of the disease, all that ebbed away. Furthemore, cardiac complications arose that required intensive medical intervention, leaving both in very difficult straits.
Of the two, one has been able to somehow triumph over her infirmities and become established in a profound sense of peace and happiness, while the other has never ceased struggling with her fate, complaining about how much she has lost, seeking one hopeful fix after another, and even spending large sums on trips to South America for questionable medical experiments. So, why do you think one is happy and the other not?
Now, closer to home, I'll use the example of my Beloved -- my Mate and Darling of my heart. At the age of 4, she was molested for the first time by her uncle. Several years later, she was again molested by her dentist. At the age of 9, she was stricken with the most severe fotrm of Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis, for which she was subjegated to the barbaric and primitive medical procedures of the time. She was forced to undergo hip replacements on both hips, which failed and needed to be re-done, necessitating months at a time of hospitalization.
During that time, she developed a rare infection called Stevens-Johnsons Syndrome, which is usually 100% fatal. Somehow, by grace, she survived being manhandled by thoughtless physicians and ridiculous treatments. The horror stories she has shared of that time would curdle your blood! Somehow, she survived, although the disease would continue to progress, rendering her nights and days a perpetual torture. She was only given aspirin, and took so much she developed a bad case of tintinitus. Once, on her way to treatment, she was abducted at knifepoint, beaten, and raped. The perp was never apprehended.
By now, she had become a "cutter", multilating herself with razors, and eventually took a large dose of pills in an attempt to end her miserable life. She was discovered and taken to the hospital, but was pronounced dead. During that time, she entered into the light, was shown the bigger picture, and sent back. Once back in the body, she remained in a coma for three days, and then made a full recovery from the poisoning.
On the basis of the nde, she plunged headlong into a deep inquiry, and although the Arthritis continued its crippling progress, she took up a form of practice called Kriya Yoga, and had many mystical experiences and was given some extraordinary realizations.
She devoted as much time as possible to the practice over the next few years, although by now she had married and birthed 2 daughters (she's actually in the medical record books as being only the second person with a double hip replacement to deliver children). Her first husband died prematurely, and she was left penniless, and eventually homelss, all the while forced to endure an ever-worsening pain situation. In fact, she was in constant agony, and yet was forced to depend on a soup kitchen for nourishment for herself and her children.
Eventually, she joined up with a couple of other poor souls and found some meager lodging. She was able to get some minimal state assistance, and attempted to go back to college, but the disease was implacable, and she was forced to drop that plan. During that time, two men abducted her at gunpoint, took her to a remote location in a van, and visciously raped her once again. This time, however, something happened. Instead of fear and revulsion, her heart melted and she instantly forgave them in the midst of the attack. She said that she felt an overwhelming love and understanding rise up in her heart, and although they had intended to kill her and dump her body, they instead drove her back and let her go free.
From there she increased her inquiry, plunging deep into her own being, and actually began using the constant agonizing pain as a prod to go deeper, until finally she underwent a profound awakening experience, in which she recognized that she was not the body, but rather, the source of all love itself. This experience was only the beginning of her spiritual transformation, and although there was no let-up from the pain, her position relative to the pain had changed, and she settled deeper and deeper into her true nature and divine condition.
When I first met her, ten years ago now, I knew instantly that she was my immortal Bleoved. We had shared many lives together, and were here now to complete something that had begun in pre-existence. I left everything immediately to be with her, including nearly a million dollars of assets. We built a cabin high in the Northern Cascade Mountain range, and undertook a period of three years of uninterrupted spiritual investigation together. I watched over time as she continued her transformation. Whatever tree or plant she touched began to blossom. I've atempted to document some of that on my photo website: http://www.pbase.com/1heart
Then I noticed birds and animals from all over would come up to be near her. As time progressed, I found that, by merely entering into her near proximity, I would be plunged into a mindless ecstasy, my kness would literally buckle, and I could hardly catch my breath. This forced me in turn to go deeper, opening myself more and more to the power of that same love, melting down one level of resistence after another, until I was able to simply embrace her physical form without passing out.
Although she has suffered more than any other human I've even known, she is now the happiest person I've ever been provileged to meet. Moreover, the innocent child-like joy she takes in even the most common things in life never ceases to delight me. Yes, she continues to suffer mightily from the deteriorating disease, sometimes moaning out in agony, and yet at the same time she will share that she has never been happier, because she knows that she is nothig but love, pure unconditional love, and that is where her true identity remains, even in the midst of unspeakable physical distress.
Well, I've rambled on quite a bit here, but I felt moved to share this with you, and with all here, to hopefully provide some understanding that, even in the midst of misery and pain, it is possible to find acceptance, and come out the other side, awake and at peace -- happy.
Thanks for your indulgence!
:yo: