Self Esteem vs. Spiritual Awakening

[DropD]

Hi all,

So a high level of self esteem encourages happiness and destruction of the ego sets you free? I have to admit this paradox is really twisting my melon.

When applying that logic, how can we be happy AND free?

I've seen some really insightful posts on transcending the ego but as far as my experience goes, the more I try, the more I descend into materialism and vices strengthen their grip... To a point where my personality flaws are getting unbearably exaggerated.

So, if we create our own reality as is the current meme, how do we differentiate between an awakening and a personality disorder? After all, we could be kidding ourselves and missing out on having fun.

I apologise if this has been raised before, please point me in the right direction.

DropD

[Anchor]

So a high level of self esteem encourages happiness and destruction of the ego sets you free? I have to admit this paradox is really twisting my melon.

When applying that logic, how can we be happy AND free?

I've seen some really insightful posts on transcending the ego but as far as my experience goes, the more I try, the more I descend into materialism and vices strengthen their grip... To a point where my personality flaws are getting unbearably exaggerated.

So, if we create our own reality as is the current meme, how do we differentiate between an awakening and a personality disorder? After all, we could be kidding ourselves and missing out on having fun.

IMO: ego is as essential for you as your body. There is a time and a place for each to finish their rounds of usefulness. One does not generally kill the physical self, why would anyone want to set about killing any other part of ones own self?

My advice would be, stop trying to follow other peoples advice (including mine by the way!!). Take some time out, commune with the inner self and/or higher self and see what that has to say instead.

[DropD]

Genuine thanks Anchor,

I get that reality/experience is an individual truth and that's the problem. I only have myself to blame if I'm on the wrong path and it goes tits up :-)

[Carmody]

Genuine thanks Anchor,

I get that reality/experience is an individual truth and that's the problem. I only have myself to blame if I'm on the wrong path and it goes tits up :-)

That is probably the best view you can have. That it is all on your plate. And the path and way are all yours, to make of it...what you will.

This (carrot), after I come from a thread where I JUST browbeat people (stick). Such is life, or a lack of it.

[markpierre]

Healthy self esteem is a spiritual attainment. Blend all the factors, welcome them in. Don't try to kill the bad ones off. The ego judges ego, nothing else in the universe would think of that.
Unhealthy ego is just an effect of that. When you can accept everything about you, you've arrived where you seemed missing. *It's a bit silly, but it's true.

[delfine]

You don´t have to get rid of the ego. The ego is the self-regulating principle, who´s job it is to secure the survival of the body. Nothing more, nothing less.
See it for what it is, and leave it at that. The art is to have a balanced ego. Neither too small nor too big.
Oftentimes our endeavors to get rid of the ego, is exactly stemming from...our ego. It is our ego (or self-image) who wants to
feel better about itself, and so makes a lot of efforts to become "better" or more "spiritual" :):

[minkton]

Drop D, that your flaws are magnifying is a sign of progress. It's called purification, and it's a sign of accelerating karma. What was under the surface, in the cleansing process, come to the fore.

And it isn't so much that we need high self esteem. We just need not to be plagued by low self esteem, because that makes us preoccupied with ourselves in non productive ways.

Ideally we need a relaxed and humorous attitude toward our ego. Having a healthy, non reactive, unhungry ego, is the first spiritual achievement.

Given that there is no self to esteem, actually, all we need is love. For ourselves, and for the others which actually are also ourselves..

[DropD]

What great responses (I struggle to copy quotes on a phone) and this was certainly not intended as a cry for help, just that I have felt different and life increasingly difficult. I'm sure everybody has to some degree.

This personal process can be very tricky and this forum has benefited most people in theirs for sure. I'd like to hold my hand up and say, after a modest 5 years investigation, I haven't got a clue what is happening. Something is though.

[modwiz]

What great responses (I struggle to copy quotes on a phone) and this was certainly not intended as a cry for help, just that I have felt different and life increasingly difficult. I'm sure everybody has to some degree.

This personal process can be very tricky and this forum has benefited most people in theirs for sure. I'd like to hold my hand up and say, after a modest 5 years investigation, I haven't got a clue what is happening. Something is though.

The ego is like a dog. (Wo)Man's best friend. Be on good terms and make sure it isn't crapping on neighbors lawns or being overly friendly and humping peoples legs. It's all about management. Good self esteem is crucial. If the ego is properly managed, it won't be the fake kind that kids get in modern schools where everybody gets a star. Even if they suck. :P Good self esteem should be reality based. Even when you create your own. There's a koan for you.

[Fred Steeves]

Hi DropD. As far as our so called "ego" is concerned, I like Bob Dylan's philosophy: "When you ain't got nothin, you ain't got nothin to lose". We like to fight, and we like to be right. Once every war has been fought and lost, maybe in that hard cold silence and humility of ultimate defeat, there's a soft little voice that can finally be heard whispering: "Now you understand that there was never anything to fight for in the first place. Relax, All Is Well".

[DropD]

I've got a lead on that animal, I agree that it should be held with enough restraint to stop people getting bitten. In an increasingly chaotic world, I suggest that ability is under threat. I remember having a sense of humour and genuine compassion for others less fortunate. The more I delve, the weaker my old abilities become. Therefore, any sane man must question their own sanity? Maybe I'm just having my 3rd mid-life crisis and substituting a motorbike with an over active crown chakra :confused:

[Anchor]

I've got a lead on that animal, I agree that it should be held with enough restraint to stop people getting bitten. In an increasingly chaotic world, I suggest that ability is under threat. I remember having a sense of humour and genuine compassion for others less fortunate. The more I delve, the weaker my old abilities become. Therefore, any sane man must question their own sanity? Maybe I'm just having my 3rd mid-life crisis and substituting a motorbike with an over active crown chakra :confused:

LOL.

That you can think deeply about this, and with a good measure of humor; indicates to me that you are in a great place already.

It seems to me that when people are concerned about things like this, that concern is centered around harsh and often ungrounded self-judgement.

I would encourage you once more to be kind to yourself.

The doorway to the inner world is often found locked.

The key to that door is silence.

[JohnEAngel]

to me, self-esteem is to feel good about yourself which should not be dependent on your status or your materialistic possessions. IMO, if you truly love yourself, self-esteem is not a even a consideration. spiritual awakening most likely has several definitions. for me, it is a continual state of conscious awareness. an inward journey to discover your true self. this promotes within me the release of negative energy. since i have gotten to a particular point with this, i have been given glimpses of my progress by having certain experiences. i recognize the ego as the personality of who you are at any given moment which changes with each experience. the ego can be refined and shifted to reflect your spiritual awakened state during your daily affairs. i am at peace. 99% of the time. ;)

[Carmen]

Spiritual awakening or rebirth is a huge leap in Self Esteem. It's not either/or. Your whole Beingness is lifted, inspired. Spirit animates the body which lifts confidence and self esteem. One falls in love with the inner Self and life flows effortlessly. The ego falls in line with this greater authority, it is also lifted, but is always subordinate to the greater Self. In my experience the ego is kinda relieved that its not the main event any more. But the awakening is just the very start of an amazing journey of understanding and realisation. As it takes years to mature to adulthood so also does spiritual growth take time and effort. It's not automatic. One has to earn the gifts of spirit.

[Flash]

What great responses (I struggle to copy quotes on a phone) and this was certainly not intended as a cry for help, just that I have felt different and life increasingly difficult. I'm sure everybody has to some degree.

This personal process can be very tricky and this forum has benefited most people in theirs for sure. I'd like to hold my hand up and say, after a modest 5 years investigation, I haven't got a clue what is happening. Something is though.

The ego is like a dog. (Wo)Man's best friend. Be on good terms and make sure it isn't crapping on neighbors lawns or being overly friendly and humping peoples legs. It's all about management. Good self esteem is crucial. If the ego is properly managed, it won't be the fake kind that kids get in modern schools where everybody gets a star. Even if they suck. :P Good self esteem should be reality based. Even when you create your own. There's a koan for you.

i always thought of the ego as being like a horse, a horse you can ride. My ego must be larger than yours, Modwiz, lol.
Riding a horse does feel good, and horses are nice, taking care of bringing you back on automatic pilot if you are lost in nature, like the body taking care of you. However, it must be tamed to be able to ride it.

[Antagenet]

There is much need for delineating the subtleties between
self-love
self-esteem
self-worth
ego
sense of self