ROMANWKT
25th January 2013, 10:45
This will be my final inquiry into the human potential, after pushing part 1 and 2 of what I had written as I felt majority of people here on Avalon did not click. Well I think that most, if not all had clicked, since the introduction to Lester Levenson, and so then a sort of final conclusion.
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?15834-Its-all-nonsense-part-1
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?32896-MANIFESTING-IN-THE-MATRIX-its-all-nonsense-part-2
I want to thank here firstly Bob, Carmody, Greybeard(Chris) and lastly who I felt was on the right track (for me anyway) of his assessment of the mechanical approach by Levenson, and that’s SKAWF (Steve), though at the moment I may not agree with his estimated 4 steps in and 4 more to go. http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?54632-The-Mechanics-and-Psychology-of-it-all.&p=621666&viewfull=1#post621666
Going back 43 years, I had already read everything that I could lay my hands on, including a whole 10 volume encyclopedia page by page, all of it, and only moved on until what one was reading was understood, then moved to Psychology, Philosophy, Zen, and the Occult and everything you could imagine, nobody to refer to, completely alone in ones thoughts.
At the age of 30 things began to happen to me, I wanted to know the truth so much that I had constant pain in my abdomen and in my chest area that was unbearable, I craved for the answers to life and the universe, I craved for Knowledge to who and what I was, I craved and I craved. For 18 months I had from then suffered the most dreadful physical and psychological effects, all day long and all night long these voices kept lecturing me constantly day and night.
I could not work, my first marriage was breaking down as my wife then could not understand, and I could not tell her. I walked out of my job, and stayed out for 2 years, but these voices would not leave me alone, I just ended laying in bed with puss running from both of my eyes, I looked as if somebody had kept punching me, my eyes were completely swollen and bruised, I had sty’s and boils all over my face with constant puss just leaking out, It scared the hell out of my family, doctors did not know where all this was coming from, friends came, I could not hold a conversation, I began to talk in in riddles and in such depth that it blew them all away to this day.
These voices lectured me continuously as I said day and night I could not sleep, every time I went to sleep I could see them, one at each ear and two in front lecturing about the creation of earth and the universe, but in different ways every time, I never had fear of them, always dressed in different coloured long gowns like Christ is always portrayed, they were human with very pleasant faces, one was very aggressive but not frightening to me in anyway, he was dressed as a Viking, a giant of a man, kept hitting his sword on his half metal half wooden shield to get your attention while others were yapping away on each side of you, this went on for 18 months, then one day I snapped and told them all to piss off and leave me alone. I begged them and I begged them to leave me alone, slowly the voices started to subside, and slowly they stopped showing themselves less and less in my sleep, until another 18 months later, it all just stopped.
That was the end of that, and had cost me 3 years of my life, and its the only experience that I had ever had. My face and my health returned back to normal, found a new job, new life. Got divorced 11 years later amicably, had no kids, had inherited 4 kids by first wife, gave everything to her, kids grown up well, and started again from scratch, got a room and owned a small mattress 1fork, 1spoon, 1plate, and 1cup, that’s it. remarried 19 years ago, all is well.
This is me 4 years later after my experience, its the only photo I have after that, as you can see all healed, and in balance.
20166
So why am I telling you these thing, because I had never shared this with anybody ever, not even with my mother, who only died only 3 years ago, This sort of crap in ones life belongs here, not out there.
Knowledge is a most wonderful thing, look outside and see what we have created through knowledge, but knowledge is the biggest rabbit hole ever devised by the mind of man, for it is not a truth, but a creation. We can spend our whole life chasing the rabbit and never find ourselves, I created something that I at first, revelled in, wallowed in, and was in rapture with, that turned to a looped nightmare for me, and I had never done drugs, ever.
This reminded me when Bob was saying that we need to have strong desire and be humbled to that which we seek, but a desire into the minefield of mind was my downfall, desire misplaced, a desire in mind, not out of mind, big mistake. Sure I meditated, but got it wrong somewhere. No guide, no religion, no direction except from books.
I wonder if anybody has grasped where I am going with this, the mechanics of course. The bible is the book of mechanic that 7 billion people would translate it differently, the Koran, the hidden Cabbala, the inner club of the Buddhists, I did not want to join any of them, I had never joined anything in my life, until nearly 2 years ago at Avalon, it is the first joining for me though I had followed it since it started.
Later looked and understood (for me anyway) that there is mind and that there is the subconscious, mind is the your genie the creator, the subconscious is the memory storage of all your experiences created by mind, the subconscious will replay into mind your accepted recording as your looped reality, as on autopilot.
Your beingness, which is you yourself projects itself into mind the Matrix, where the matrix being a mathematical, fractal reflection steaming from your beingness, a projection that you call I, that I assumes an animated existence within the mind of the matrix, I assumes a body that can reproduce itself in this reflection, I is in the bubble of the matrix mind that we all share, as we are all a constant projection from our beingness living an illusional I reality. When we die, we drop mind the matrix, the illusional I, therefore having lost the projection from yourself your beingness of the illusional matrix mind, any false separation that may of had existed in the reflection as I (as you) would melt into your beingness that had itself (you) projected in this mind for what we call our reality and lifetime.
I do not believe that ones beingness is going home as they say, because beingness stems from another projection, another mind that would be the logos, a type of archetype, for a human spices, a clan that extends itself into beingness, that beingness projects itself into matrix individualised through by ones DNA codes. I also believe, that going beyond the logos lead to the source mind of all that is, some masters have pointed out that going beyond as up to 10th dimension, that still the source had not been found. Something is projecting, projections, of projections, from an original mind itself, that even your beingness is itself a projection from something greater.
Your potential lies in clearing the path to your creative mind, which is a projection from yourself, your beingness. Your genie your mind is interfered with by your subconscious memory that has been indoctrinated with false belief, until that path is cleared, you will not attain your full potential, hence levensons releasing and Ho, oponopono.
I am cutting this short, its to long.
Therefore knowing and understanding the mechanics, would firstly lead to more people to excelling in the matrix as human potential, and secondly would lead to understanding of the difference between mind and beingness, for one can only seek for that elusive truth through beingness, and not through mind as its only a creator and only returns what you have stored within your recording, your subconscious, hence caught in a loop as I had 33 years ago.
So to repeat the obvious to most of you here, removing the mind out of the equation when dealing within yourself as to your beingness and asking the question why? That’s why we have to still the mind completely, before we attempt to ask infinity of what is, rather than asking a creative mind who will create all the answers that you allow it to create, which are false. So meditation as taught by all, for thousands of years is the only ways to still the mind first and proceed.
I would like to finish with this video that was shown by our Chris, which amply answers all to me and the last answer to a question, which I am sure we with all the best intentions, fall into, as do I.
UFr3OvPdpb8
Warmest regards to you all and thank you
roman
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?15834-Its-all-nonsense-part-1
http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?32896-MANIFESTING-IN-THE-MATRIX-its-all-nonsense-part-2
I want to thank here firstly Bob, Carmody, Greybeard(Chris) and lastly who I felt was on the right track (for me anyway) of his assessment of the mechanical approach by Levenson, and that’s SKAWF (Steve), though at the moment I may not agree with his estimated 4 steps in and 4 more to go. http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?54632-The-Mechanics-and-Psychology-of-it-all.&p=621666&viewfull=1#post621666
Going back 43 years, I had already read everything that I could lay my hands on, including a whole 10 volume encyclopedia page by page, all of it, and only moved on until what one was reading was understood, then moved to Psychology, Philosophy, Zen, and the Occult and everything you could imagine, nobody to refer to, completely alone in ones thoughts.
At the age of 30 things began to happen to me, I wanted to know the truth so much that I had constant pain in my abdomen and in my chest area that was unbearable, I craved for the answers to life and the universe, I craved for Knowledge to who and what I was, I craved and I craved. For 18 months I had from then suffered the most dreadful physical and psychological effects, all day long and all night long these voices kept lecturing me constantly day and night.
I could not work, my first marriage was breaking down as my wife then could not understand, and I could not tell her. I walked out of my job, and stayed out for 2 years, but these voices would not leave me alone, I just ended laying in bed with puss running from both of my eyes, I looked as if somebody had kept punching me, my eyes were completely swollen and bruised, I had sty’s and boils all over my face with constant puss just leaking out, It scared the hell out of my family, doctors did not know where all this was coming from, friends came, I could not hold a conversation, I began to talk in in riddles and in such depth that it blew them all away to this day.
These voices lectured me continuously as I said day and night I could not sleep, every time I went to sleep I could see them, one at each ear and two in front lecturing about the creation of earth and the universe, but in different ways every time, I never had fear of them, always dressed in different coloured long gowns like Christ is always portrayed, they were human with very pleasant faces, one was very aggressive but not frightening to me in anyway, he was dressed as a Viking, a giant of a man, kept hitting his sword on his half metal half wooden shield to get your attention while others were yapping away on each side of you, this went on for 18 months, then one day I snapped and told them all to piss off and leave me alone. I begged them and I begged them to leave me alone, slowly the voices started to subside, and slowly they stopped showing themselves less and less in my sleep, until another 18 months later, it all just stopped.
That was the end of that, and had cost me 3 years of my life, and its the only experience that I had ever had. My face and my health returned back to normal, found a new job, new life. Got divorced 11 years later amicably, had no kids, had inherited 4 kids by first wife, gave everything to her, kids grown up well, and started again from scratch, got a room and owned a small mattress 1fork, 1spoon, 1plate, and 1cup, that’s it. remarried 19 years ago, all is well.
This is me 4 years later after my experience, its the only photo I have after that, as you can see all healed, and in balance.
20166
So why am I telling you these thing, because I had never shared this with anybody ever, not even with my mother, who only died only 3 years ago, This sort of crap in ones life belongs here, not out there.
Knowledge is a most wonderful thing, look outside and see what we have created through knowledge, but knowledge is the biggest rabbit hole ever devised by the mind of man, for it is not a truth, but a creation. We can spend our whole life chasing the rabbit and never find ourselves, I created something that I at first, revelled in, wallowed in, and was in rapture with, that turned to a looped nightmare for me, and I had never done drugs, ever.
This reminded me when Bob was saying that we need to have strong desire and be humbled to that which we seek, but a desire into the minefield of mind was my downfall, desire misplaced, a desire in mind, not out of mind, big mistake. Sure I meditated, but got it wrong somewhere. No guide, no religion, no direction except from books.
I wonder if anybody has grasped where I am going with this, the mechanics of course. The bible is the book of mechanic that 7 billion people would translate it differently, the Koran, the hidden Cabbala, the inner club of the Buddhists, I did not want to join any of them, I had never joined anything in my life, until nearly 2 years ago at Avalon, it is the first joining for me though I had followed it since it started.
Later looked and understood (for me anyway) that there is mind and that there is the subconscious, mind is the your genie the creator, the subconscious is the memory storage of all your experiences created by mind, the subconscious will replay into mind your accepted recording as your looped reality, as on autopilot.
Your beingness, which is you yourself projects itself into mind the Matrix, where the matrix being a mathematical, fractal reflection steaming from your beingness, a projection that you call I, that I assumes an animated existence within the mind of the matrix, I assumes a body that can reproduce itself in this reflection, I is in the bubble of the matrix mind that we all share, as we are all a constant projection from our beingness living an illusional I reality. When we die, we drop mind the matrix, the illusional I, therefore having lost the projection from yourself your beingness of the illusional matrix mind, any false separation that may of had existed in the reflection as I (as you) would melt into your beingness that had itself (you) projected in this mind for what we call our reality and lifetime.
I do not believe that ones beingness is going home as they say, because beingness stems from another projection, another mind that would be the logos, a type of archetype, for a human spices, a clan that extends itself into beingness, that beingness projects itself into matrix individualised through by ones DNA codes. I also believe, that going beyond the logos lead to the source mind of all that is, some masters have pointed out that going beyond as up to 10th dimension, that still the source had not been found. Something is projecting, projections, of projections, from an original mind itself, that even your beingness is itself a projection from something greater.
Your potential lies in clearing the path to your creative mind, which is a projection from yourself, your beingness. Your genie your mind is interfered with by your subconscious memory that has been indoctrinated with false belief, until that path is cleared, you will not attain your full potential, hence levensons releasing and Ho, oponopono.
I am cutting this short, its to long.
Therefore knowing and understanding the mechanics, would firstly lead to more people to excelling in the matrix as human potential, and secondly would lead to understanding of the difference between mind and beingness, for one can only seek for that elusive truth through beingness, and not through mind as its only a creator and only returns what you have stored within your recording, your subconscious, hence caught in a loop as I had 33 years ago.
So to repeat the obvious to most of you here, removing the mind out of the equation when dealing within yourself as to your beingness and asking the question why? That’s why we have to still the mind completely, before we attempt to ask infinity of what is, rather than asking a creative mind who will create all the answers that you allow it to create, which are false. So meditation as taught by all, for thousands of years is the only ways to still the mind first and proceed.
I would like to finish with this video that was shown by our Chris, which amply answers all to me and the last answer to a question, which I am sure we with all the best intentions, fall into, as do I.
UFr3OvPdpb8
Warmest regards to you all and thank you
roman