50 Shades of Grey – Pedophilia Hiding In Plain Sight

[magnum]

The story of convicted child rapist Jerry Sandusky is well known. So too is the 50 Shades of Grey phenomena, a book that has become so popular among women that some are referring to it as “Mommy Porn” for the masses. That description is actually a lot more disturbing than a lot of folks are currently realizing.

Yes, 50 Shades is pornography. Like most pornography, the story line is weak, the characters one-dimensional, while the sex itself graphic, detailed, but formulaic. The underlying theme to 50 Shades is something far more sinister and appalling though than your mere run-of-the-mill porn. It is pedophilia. It is child porn. Kiddie porn.

Now I know after saying that, many female fans of 50 Shades, many of them mothers, will naturally put up a defense against that kind of description. These women, being mothers, are naturally wired to protect kids. People like Jerry Sandusky are viewed with hatred, revulsion, and disgust. Rightfully so. What mother would want to condone anything having to do with the sexual abuse of children? Of innocents?
http://watchdogwire.com/florida/2013/03/10/50-shades-of-grey-pedophilia-hiding-in-plain-sight/

[Agape]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/02/15/fifty-shades-of-grey-box-office_n_6687954.html


1. "Fifty Shades of Grey," $81.7 million ($158 million international).

2. "Kingsman: The Secret Service," $35.6 million ($23.1 million international).

3. "The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water," $30.5 million ($13.5 million international).

4. "American Sniper," $16.4 million ($3.7 million international).

5. "Jupiter Ascending," $9.4 million ($15.6 million international).

6. "Seventh Son," $4.2 million ($730,000 international).

7. "Paddington," $4.1 million.

8. "The Imitation Game," $3.5 million ($4 million international).

9. "The Wedding Ringer," $3.4 million.

10. "Project Almanac," $2.7 million ($340,000 international).





Do they spend all these money to keep people entertained ?


;)

[lucidity]

The story of convicted child rapist Jerry Sandusky is well known. So too is the 50 Shades of Grey phenomena, a book that has become so popular among women that some are referring to it as “Mommy Porn” for the masses. That description is actually a lot more disturbing than a lot of folks are currently realizing.

Yes, 50 Shades is pornography. Like most pornography, the story line is weak, the characters one-dimensional, while the sex itself graphic, detailed, but formulaic. The underlying theme to 50 Shades is something far more sinister and appalling though than your mere run-of-the-mill porn. It is pedophilia. It is child porn. Kiddie porn.

Now I know after saying that, many female fans of 50 Shades, many of them mothers, will naturally put up a defense against that kind of description. These women, being mothers, are naturally wired to protect kids. People like Jerry Sandusky are viewed with hatred, revulsion, and disgust. Rightfully so. What mother would want to condone anything having to do with the sexual abuse of children? Of innocents?
http://watchdogwire.com/florida/2013/03/10/50-shades-of-grey-pedophilia-hiding-in-plain-sight/

Hi Magnum,

It all seems a little vague... can you provide some examples from the book that demonstrate that this book
either _is_ paedophilic or in some way condones paedophilia.

Thanks for your help

be happy

lucidity :-)

[joeecho]

Pictures and video of mangled and the dead children of wars is also child pornography but that doesn't stop them from being published.

Definitions work on a sliding scale. Where have you slid the bar to?

[Earth Angel]

if you read the link there is a lot more info on why it is considered pedophilia...other than the given age of the woman as 21, everything about her character is child like, her language, her knowledge, the way she is treated....hidden in plain sight....call her a legal aged female but everything else is childlike



The story of convicted child rapist Jerry Sandusky is well known. So too is the 50 Shades of Grey phenomena, a book that has become so popular among women that some are referring to it as “Mommy Porn” for the masses. That description is actually a lot more disturbing than a lot of folks are currently realizing.

Yes, 50 Shades is pornography. Like most pornography, the story line is weak, the characters one-dimensional, while the sex itself graphic, detailed, but formulaic. The underlying theme to 50 Shades is something far more sinister and appalling though than your mere run-of-the-mill porn. It is pedophilia. It is child porn. Kiddie porn.

Now I know after saying that, many female fans of 50 Shades, many of them mothers, will naturally put up a defense against that kind of description. These women, being mothers, are naturally wired to protect kids. People like Jerry Sandusky are viewed with hatred, revulsion, and disgust. Rightfully so. What mother would want to condone anything having to do with the sexual abuse of children? Of innocents?
http://watchdogwire.com/florida/2013/03/10/50-shades-of-grey-pedophilia-hiding-in-plain-sight/

Hi Magnum,

It all seems a little vague... can you provide some examples from the book that demonstrate that this book
either _is_ paedophilic or in some way condones paedophilia.

Thanks for your help

be happy

lucidity :-)

[Carmen]

That is indeed disturbing! I just thought it was a pathetic story of no interest to me and I wondered why anyone would want to read the book. Now I see what it really is and that is just dreadful. Maybe when people are made aware of the pedefilia connection they will think again! Or maybe not!!

[joeecho]

So then sliding scale changes from legal age to some psychological IQ assessment. Certainly wouldn't want it to be from an opinion would we?

[shadowstalker]

From the article:

The female character has no sexual experience. None. She is given the age of 21, but that age is itself a cover. Her true emotional age is much-much younger. She has never even masturbated. She has never even experienced an orgasm. That alone is one of the greatest attractions to the pedophile. That is the psychology of that kind of act. You get off on taking purity.

So does that mean that I was with a pedo?
Really?, didn't give it up till i was 20, didn't bother with the other stuff till 25. strictly speaking didn't feel the need to.

I won't even get into the other personal aspects, If this be the case then I know a lot of pedos out there, and I am sure many others do as well.

[lastlegs]

I saw this movie Friday night. Until then I had never heard of the books etc. At my senior citizens center, fundamentalists dropped off written sermons of hell, fire, and damnation over this. The local paper had several letters demanding the closing of the local theater.

I told people I was going to see Jupiter Rising and I went. Prohibition always produces sold out theater and so it was. I am almost blind and have to sit way down front. Behind me were six women crunched down in their seats giggling the whole time. My take on them is they want to see if there is something they might have missed.

This is a movie where you will see what you want to see or are ready to see. I saw Last Tango in Paris at the same age and it had a much worse story. Same for the Story of O. But being young, the sex was titillating. What I personally liked about this movie is it made me remember what it felt to just feel the breathe of a beloved.

I liked the movie and I am going to buy the books. Everything else that follows will be considered spoilers.

I wasn't that impressed with guy as either a lover or an actor. I was impressed by the woman. She had a lot more courage at her age than I ever did.

She is totally and completely adult in negotiating this "contract" about what she is willing to do and why. Certainly, at 21 I did not know what a butt plug was and I don't think I could have asked to have someone explain it to me who wanted to use it on me.

The basic exploration theme of this movie is finding out who you are by what you are willing to do, who are you doing it with, and for what reasons. Doing sex is fundamentally expressing intimately who you are. These two people are intensely attracted to each other from the moment they meet. Both of them are uncomfortable about it. Both of them express it would not be a good thing but for different reasons. But the deep desire remains maybe because they both consider it forbidden.

When these two people speak to each other it is pretty direct and to the point. I was impressed by that and at that age could not have done it but then I did not have the internet to be exposed to so much. The average age of first watching porn in the US is 11. and I do not have a problem with that. less bad sex occurs when basic curiosity is fulfilled.

Addressing the criticisms I have read. Anna is not allowed to show an orgasm. I think she had multiple orgasms from the get go. Most porn orgasms are way over the top. She says to this guy, she has never had sex before because she never found anyone she wanted enough. Her relationships on the screen show men attracted to her and putting that out there and her caring about their feelings and still saying no. There are lots of things that occur that show she is not in it for the money. She specifically asks how many women before. She repeatedly asks him about why he is like this. He tells her he was a submissive with one of his mother 's friends for 6 years from the age of 15. She immediately says child abuse and he tells her what he thinks he got out of it. "It made him feel safe." That was the most incongruous statement in the movie. He also says his mother never knew. His mother referred to is his adoptive mother and his biological mother was an addict. So he claims and accepts himself as ****ed up and this is just who he is.

He is more seriously attracted to her when he finds out she is a virgin. Her innocence is both an attraction and repulsion. He is jealous, protective, and possessive. It comes across as love more than lust. She is not drop dead beautiful. She is a basic good girl who makes a decision to make love with this guy. The first go around is normal love making leaving him so exhausted that he does not keep his normal policy of not sleeping with a woman. She gets up invigorated and makes him breakfast. He comes across as amazed that now that he has "possessed" her, he is still aroused by her. He allows them doing some normal things that he considers bonuses.

She is always psychologically resistant to him. Attracted to him, wanting him, maybe even loving him but absolutely not willing to be subsumed by him. unlike every other S/M book,video etc. she asks him why do you want to hurt me, why do you need to hurt me to love me. He never has a reason except that is who he is.

She tells him several times that she is only willing to experience this to understand him. Finally, she says do your worst so I don't have to think about it but will know what it is. Nothing in the movie is really what I would consider violent only a from of ritual play acting that may amuse some people. Panning the play room was pretty interesting. There were lots of things I wish I had known about and could afford when I was in my 30s--tantra chair and couch, great bed, nice swing. My bias in favor of this movie is I love sex and I like imaginative sex and intensely physical sex. I am also very quiet which for me increases the intensity.

But for the record I could never do S/M. Tried it once and the minute he tied me, he who I loved I immediately hated. When he kissed me I bit him badly and we never did that again.

At the end of his doing his worst, she says is this what you wanted--seeing me like this in pain and humiliated. She says no thanks. Returns everything. They are both calm and extremely polite.
Their goodbyes are Anna and Christian, the elevator doors close and the movie ends.

What I saw was interesting and timely and gives me hope for the new generation. I will read the books to see what else I learn.

[shadowstalker]

I saw this movie Friday night. Until then I had never heard of the books etc. At my senior citizens center, fundamentalists dropped off written sermons of hell, fire, and damnation over this. The local paper had several letters demanding the closing of the local theater.

I told people I was going to see Jupiter Rising and I went. Prohibition always produces sold out theater and so it was. I am almost blind and have to sit way down front. Behind me were six women crunched down in their seats giggling the whole time. My take on them is they want to see if there is something they might have missed.

This is a movie where you will see what you want to see or are ready to see. I saw Last Tango in Paris at the same age and it had a much worse story. Same for the Story of O. But being young, the sex was titillating. What I personally liked about this movie is it made me remember what it felt to just feel the breathe of a beloved.

I liked the movie and I am going to buy the books. Everything else that follows will be considered spoilers.

I wasn't that impressed with guy as either a lover or an actor. I was impressed by the woman. She had a lot more courage at her age than I ever did.

She is totally and completely adult in negotiating this "contract" about what she is willing to do and why. Certainly, at 21 I did not know what a butt plug was and I don't think I could have asked to have someone explain it to me who wanted to use it on me.

The basic exploration theme of this movie is finding out who you are by what you are willing to do, who are you doing it with, and for what reasons. Doing sex is fundamentally expressing intimately who you are. These two people are intensely attracted to each other from the moment they meet. Both of them are uncomfortable about it. Both of them express it would not be a good thing but for different reasons. But the deep desire remains maybe because they both consider it forbidden.

When these two people speak to each other it is pretty direct and to the point. I was impressed by that and at that age could not have done it but then I did not have the internet to be exposed to so much. The average age of first watching porn in the US is 11. and I do not have a problem with that. less bad sex occurs when basic curiosity is fulfilled.

Addressing the criticisms I have read. Anna is not allowed to show an orgasm. I think she had multiple orgasms from the get go. Most porn orgasms are way over the top. She says to this guy, she has never had sex before because she never found anyone she wanted enough. Her relationships on the screen show men attracted to her and putting that out there and her caring about their feelings and still saying no. There are lots of things that occur that show she is not in it for the money. She specifically asks how many women before. She repeatedly asks him about why he is like this. He tells her he was a submissive with one of his mother 's friends for 6 years from the age of 15. She immediately says child abuse and he tells her what he thinks he got out of it. "It made him feel safe." That was the most incongruous statement in the movie. He also says his mother never knew. His mother referred to is his adoptive mother and his biological mother was an addict. So he claims and accepts himself as ****ed up and this is just who he is.

He is more seriously attracted to her when he finds out she is a virgin. Her innocence is both an attraction and repulsion. He is jealous, protective, and possessive. It comes across as love more than lust. She is not drop dead beautiful. She is a basic good girl who makes a decision to make love with this guy. The first go around is normal love making leaving him so exhausted that he does not keep his normal policy of not sleeping with a woman. She gets up invigorated and makes him breakfast. He comes across as amazed that now that he has "possessed" her, he is still aroused by her. He allows them doing some normal things that he considers bonuses.

She is always psychologically resistant to him. Attracted to him, wanting him, maybe even loving him but absolutely not willing to be subsumed by him. unlike every other S/M book,video etc. she asks him why do you want to hurt me, why do you need to hurt me to love me. He never has a reason except that is who he is.

She tells him several times that she is only willing to experience this to understand him. Finally, she says do your worst so I don't have to think about it but will know what it is. Nothing in the movie is really what I would consider violent only a from of ritual play acting that may amuse some people. Panning the play room was pretty interesting. There were lots of things I wish I had known about and could afford when I was in my 30s--tantra chair and couch, great bed, nice swing. My bias in favor of this movie is I love sex and I like imaginative sex and intensely physical sex. I am also very quiet which for me increases the intensity.

But for the record I could never do S/M. Tried it once and the minute he tied me, he who I loved I immediately hated. When he kissed me I bit him badly and we never did that again.

At the end of his doing his worst, she says is this what you wanted--seeing me like this in pain and humiliated. She says no thanks. Returns everything. They are both calm and extremely polite.
Their goodbyes are Anna and Christian, the elevator doors close and the movie ends.

What I saw was interesting and timely and gives me hope for the new generation. I will read the books to see what else I learn.

I love your critique, insightful and honest, make me want to watch this movie by myself..lol

[Natalia]

I haven't read the book or watched the film, but have an opinion on the following:


if you read the link there is a lot more info on why it is considered pedophilia...other than the given age of the woman as 21, everything about her character is child like, her language, her knowledge, the way she is treated....hidden in plain sight....call her a legal aged female but everything else is childlike


She is still a woman. She is not a child, therefore, if any man sleeps with her (no matter how old he is) it is not pedophilia, and the guy in the film wasn't that much older than her...

Women can be childlike or have something childlike about them, at any age...men can find it cute...surely he liked/loved her combination of being a woman/child (this is kinda how I see myself sometimes, and a right guy will love that about me). It's a bit like, if a grown man has a boy like aspect to him, that can be cute, too, as part of the whole package of him...doesn't mean that a woman who liked that aspect as part of the whole (and her girl and his boy can play together) would want to date a child.

[Natalia]

It can be a compatible love

http://www.wattpad.com/94678008-daddy%27s-girl-ddlg-daddy-dom-little-girl

[Elainie]

I have not read the book or watched the film either. I have read reviews of it and all say it's awful. My cousin bought the distribution rights to the film and I'm sure will make tons more money than he already has. That said................I lived as a submissive to an abusive, sociopathic BDSM sexual dominant. He is now deceased and as an outlet during those years I became a professional domina myself.

[Natalia]

I have not read the book or watched the film either. I have read reviews of it and all say it's awful. My cousin bought the distribution rights to the film and I'm sure will make tons more money than he already has. That said................I lived as a submissive to an abusive, sociopathic BDSM sexual dominant. He is now deceased and as an outlet during those years I became a professional domina myself.

I am sorry that you went through that abuse, ERK. I want a (truly) loving dominant male for a partner and it is compatible with me and my combination of being a woman and girl (the highs, and lows, the sweet stuff, and the cry baby insecure need a daddy stuff) but I do not want to be abused (most people don't?, BDSM, if both partners enjoy it, is ok and not abuse, imo - the hardcore stuff is not for me...)...

[magnum]

https://fbexternal-a.akamaihd.net/safe_image.php?d=AQBTxDZrAxJEJrTv&w=418&h=418&url=https%3A%2F%2Ffbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net%2Fhphotos-ak-xpa1%2Fv%2Ft1.0-9%2Fp480x480%2F10891551_10152767962463882_2120699900164365022_n.jpg%3Foh%3Dd7cf51900b7ad757bc01833c7 4b9e25e%26oe%3D5553745D%26__gda__%3D1432242594_24a06449f99be345b7fad98e9ff27aa9

[lastlegs]

https://fbexternal-a.akamaihd.net/safe_image.php?d=AQBTxDZrAxJEJrTv&w=418&h=418&url=https%3A%2F%2Ffbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net%2Fhphotos-ak-xpa1%2Fv%2Ft1.0-9%2Fp480x480%2F10891551_10152767962463882_2120699900164365022_n.jpg%3Foh%3Dd7cf51900b7ad757bc01833c7 4b9e25e%26oe%3D5553745D%26__gda__%3D1432242594_24a06449f99be345b7fad98e9ff27aa9

I expect something better than this kind of comment on this site.

1. Who or what does this comment represent?

2. It is strictly an opinion and not a fact?

3. a review of a movie is an opinion of a viewpoint of another person which a movie is.

4. It is like tales of Roshomon, we all see from our perspectives.

5. It is like proving the Bible by quoting the Bible.

[Becky]

I have read the books and would like to see the film. It did not occur to me at any time that it was about paedaphilia. Sometimes I think people like to read what they want into things.
One could say the same about Pride and Prejudice written by Jane Austin, where the parents, no less, let Lydia 'come out' at the tender age of fifteen, inappropriately young, and Mr Wickham takes advantage of her!
Where do we draw the line?

[yelik]

I have not read the the books or seen the film although my wife wants to see it, drawn in by the reviews.

We should all know the Illuminati control Hollywood movies which contain covert messaging and disclosure which is designed to gain our tacit free will support.

As long as people are aware and it causes no harm to self or others watch what you want, within reason of course

Unfortunately when the Elites engage in their satanic rituals and pedophilia it gradually becomes an accepted practice that gives them the so called 'ultimate thrill' of life over death which infects their minds like a rancid virus (courtesy of ET mind control technology and genetic manipulation I suspect)

[MorningFox]

I mean no offence but if you see paedophilia in an adult erotic story then it's apparent that the problem lies with you and not the story itself.

[lastlegs]

I have read the books and would like to see the film. It did not occur to me at any time that it was about paedaphilia. Sometimes I think people like to read what they want into things.
One could say the same about Pride and Prejudice written by Jane Austin, where the parents, no less, let Lydia 'come out' at the tender age of fifteen, inappropriately young, and Mr Wickham takes advantage of her!
Where do we draw the line?

Since you have read the books and I haven't and knowing what movies do to books. Is my review of the movie very accurate to the story of the book?

God apparently did not have a problem choosing a 13 year old for his son's mother. Perhaps with an eye to the revelation of divinity and people believing a virgin birth?

Everything can be looked at from different points of views and that is the strength of this site, letting people find their own way to truth and not top down this is it--making dogma the only way.

[Natalia]

I'm sure that the majority of members here (and people in the world) are disgusted and horrified by (real) pedophilia.

Sexual preferences between 2 consenting adults, is a different matter...

[magnum]

http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/pornography_is_what_the_end_of_the_world_looks_like_20150215

"BOSTON—“Fifty Shades of Grey,” the book and the movie, is a celebration of the sadism that dominates nearly every aspect of American culture and lies at the core of pornography and global capitalism. It glorifies our dehumanization of women. It champions a world devoid of compassion, empathy and love. It eroticizes hypermasculine power that carries out the abuse, degradation, humiliation and torture of women whose personalities have been removed, whose only desire is to debase themselves in the service of male lust. The film, like “American Sniper,” unquestioningly accepts a predatory world where the weak and the vulnerable are objects to exploit while the powerful are narcissistic and violent demigods. It blesses this capitalist hell as natural and good. "

[Elainie]

^^^ Good article above.

[noxon medem]

- far above ..

;- )

PS.
- and sorry for this pointless posting.
A marker to find this thread back later .

..
-

[Becky]

Yes Lastlegs, I like your review of the film - it's probably fairly close to the book. There are 2 more books with a bit more of a storyline and a fairytale ending to complete the trilogy (spoiler alert, sorry!).

Quote Posted by Becky (here)
I have read the books and would like to see the film. It did not occur to me at any time that it was about paedaphilia. Sometimes I think people like to read what they want into things.
One could say the same about Pride and Prejudice written by Jane Austin, where the parents, no less, let Lydia 'come out' at the tender age of fifteen, inappropriately young, and Mr Wickham takes advantage of her!
Where do we draw the line?

Lastlegs wrote...
Since you have read the books and I haven't and knowing what movies do to books. Is my review of the movie very accurate to the story of the book?

God apparently did not have a problem choosing a 13 year old for his son's mother. Perhaps with an eye to the revelation of divinity and people believing a virgin birth?

Everything can be looked at from different points of views and that is the strength of this site, letting people find their own way to truth and not top down this is it--making dogma the only way.

[Natalia]

That article was disturbing :( those poor women. It's not black and white though. I would never do porn but I imagine that some women enjoy it. Are they really all victims? I know that some are and that is wrong. I'm just not a black and white thinker (generally).

btw, good way to put a woman down by calling her a feminist because she believes in sexual Independence (to be submissive or not) for women. Women are also called feminists for seeing sex as dirty and being closed minded about it...

[Elainie]

Interesting listen- he too speaks about the pedo aspect of the book/film.

Stefan Molyneux analyses the phenomenon that is Fifty Shades of Grey. Both the books and the film offer a disturbing yet fascinating view of the often hidden dynamics that underlie female sexuality, intimate partner violence, and a multitude of taboo subjects. What can we learn and what should we discard? You can find the answers in Stefan Molyneux's review of Fifty Shades of Grey!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIqgjsPEs8s

[magnum]

considering the fact that this movie and book have been so hyped and are so popular it is important to analyse just what they are trying to engrain in the masses with it...here are a few more opinions

http://yournewswire.com/fifty-shades-of-satanism/

"Could the latest box office smash Fifty Shade Of Grey be leading us into Satanic ways? According to Henry Makow at Truthseeker website: “Satanism is all about making perverse seem healthy and healthy seem sick. Thus the movie is released on Valentine’s Day, formerly reserved for innocent celebration of romance. The hero of the movie is named “Christian.” - See more at: http://yournewswire.com/fifty-shades-of-satanism/#sthash.Zzu49fEL.2iI9GcI6.dpuf

http://www.scarymommy.com/a-letter-to-my-children-about-fifty-shades-of-grey/

"My Precious Children,

Tonight, I succumbed to peer pressure (exactly what I caution you NEVER to do) and went with a bunch of girlfriends to see Fifty Shades of Grey. I ignored the little voice in my head that implored me to just say “no!” because, after all, it’s just a silly movie, right? Well, I wish I had done as I always tell you to do and given that voice credit because it was right. The thing is, I’m also kind of glad I didn’t because now I have these words for you
- See more at: http://www.scarymommy.com/a-letter-to-my-children-about-fifty-shades-of-grey/#sthash.Ep4MApBk.dpuf"

http://yournewswire.com/do-not-see-fifty-shades-of-grey-psychiatrist-warns/

A letter by Psychiatrist Miriam Grossman has been posted online telling young people not to be manipulated by the messages contained in the movie Fifty Shades of Grey.

In the letter Grossman calls the movie “black” saying “its toxic message is seeping into our culture, and could plant dangerous ideas in your head.”

She urges people not to see the movie, saying “DON’T see Fifty Shades of Grey. Get informed, learn the facts, and explain to your friends why they shouldn’t see it either
- See more at: http://yournewswire.com/do-not-see-fifty-shades-of-grey-psychiatrist-warns/#sthash.bV2kGvsv.dpuf

[Elainie]

For me and what I experienced delving heavily into BDSM- there are dangers just as there is with any type of sex magic. First off don't be led astray by the community telling the public the sub is the one with the real control. I believe that's just a manipulation. We can take apart the very word submission using etymology, the same with dominant. It's a power imbalance, consensual or not. I prefer to be on equal ground with a partner, sexual and otherwise, a mutual exchange of energy.

BDSM was my introduction to the world of demonology. I don't want to write too much about it, as it's the past now but yes, there are demonic entities that feed off this type of sex.

[Natalia]

I agree with you, ERK, about not being fooled into believing that the women have all the power in BDSM relationships (I have read a little into this after a male friend got me curious about it...)...it seems to me from reading about people's experience (and not my own because I don't have any of that kind) that there are some relationships that are healthier than others and where the man respects his partner and the woman respects herself, more than others...and that some women will pretend that they are happy with something quite extreme, when they are not...also some of the practices that I read about made me feel sick and they were scary, something I would never do for any man...in fact most of it I would not want to do...just the milder fun play without pain stuff with a guy I truly trust who truly does love and respect me...I am more into the D/S (Dom/Sub) than BDSM (I'm not into pain or humiliation, but some people are...).

I read on my friend's wall today this article and it got me thinking, without knowing "the answer", does it really encourage domestic abuse? (I hope not, but then you could say that any film with rough play in it could do if a person watching it uses it for bad...what if people use it for good instead? Is it like with all things, it can be abused or not?)


Fifty Shades of Grey: It doesn't take a genius to realise that Christian Grey is a domestic abuser
If you knew someone who was dating someone who did any of the things he does to Anastasia, wouldn't you tell them to run?

http://www.independent.co.uk/voices/comment/fifty-shades-of-grey-it-doesnt-take-a-genius-to-realise-that-christian-grey-is-a-domestic-abuser-10044301.html?fb_ref=Default

So I wanted to watch the trailer again (I did so all those months ago when it first came out) and I found it very sexy...

SfZWFDs0LxA

(I am going to have to watch the film now to educate myself - on dvd by myself, not watching that in the cinema with loads of people!)

[Elainie]

Not everyone into BDSM is a sociopath and Mr. Grey's variety of BDSM seems like the lighthanded kind (a bit of flogging , some bondage and blindfolds- no big deal). But Mr. Grey is also a controlling sociopath. I think that's the larger issue with this movie, from the reviews I read it seems Ana doesn't even enjoy it so I'm not sure what the allure was to her? His money I assume.

[Natalia]

Not everyone into BDSM is a sociopath and Mr. Grey's variety of BDSM seems like the lighthanded kind (a bit of flogging , some bondage and blindfolds- no big deal). But Mr. Grey is also a controlling sociopath. I think that's the larger issue with this movie, from the reviews I read it seems Ana doesn't even enjoy it so I'm not sure what the allure was to her? His money I assume.

She seems to enjoy some of it from the trailer (?), and some of it she is not sure about...is that more realistic than porn when the woman fakes that she loves all of it so very loudly?

I identify a bit with her because I am quite shy and quiet with men...and sometimes I enjoy things more than I show...and for a (sexy and right for me) man to be so dominant and take charge sexually (and in some but not all other ways) is ideal for me and my nature...so I have some empathy (or so I think) with her character...

Perhaps she likes his money, too...and his position of power...but is it mostly the way that he takes charge that she is drawn to (even if she is not sure if she likes it or not). Does she feel flattered that he chose her? Is she curious?

I don't see this as being just about a poor victim young woman, even if he is a "sociopath" (which I did not know, but maybe he is).

[DNA]

I think the old Bill Hicks review for the movie basic instinct applies wonderfully to fifty shades of grey.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVS_DxhQGfI[/url]

[Natalia]

^lol

well even if it is a "piece of sh*t" that lift scene where he grabs and kisses her is "sexy sh*t"

*needs a boyfriend* *giggle* :)

[Mike]

im really enjoying this thread;) and not because im a twisted pervert either (tho I am)...its due mainly to feeling the collective squirm with each and every post. what can i say? its giving me great satisfaction!

look, theres definitely a direct relationship to a deep interest in aliens and conspiracy and a woeful inability to get laid;). this is self evident. this is going to sound very simplistic, but I think people take an interest in this stuff sometimes because they cant get laid. its a sort of consolation prize. in general, folks come to the material discussed on the forum because first and foremost they have the time to do so. what does this mean? it means youre either A. out of work, B. have recently been dumped, C. have not been in a serious relationship for a very long time, D. youre a social misfit, E. youre current relationship sucks, or F. youre kind of old and have lost interest in intimacy/relationships with the opposite sex, G. all of the above. but no matter how you cut it, you have excessive time...

and why do you have time? well, see A, B, C, D, E, and F

and here's the kicker: once you "awaken" you've only further alienated yourself from the rest of society, so your previously poor chances of getting laid have now only gotten worse. I had to explain this to a young man here once; he'd started a thread about striking out, and it was clear that his passion for ufology was a detriment to his er....social life. my advice: leave the aliens at home for the first few dates. let her like you first....then tell her you think youre a hybrid alien from the lower 4th dimension;).

anyway, if you think im being hard on the forum, keep in mind that im an active participant on it too. in fact, im probably a 'C' from my list up above. and since I hate condoms but am terrified of sexually transmitted diseases, ive wound up in this weird sexual wasteland where I go long periods without intimacy....even tho I have women literally throwing themselves at my feet hehe:p not true, unfortunately. true at one time maybe...well, nevermind, im digging myself a hole here....:p

what happened to me was this: I was intimate with a young woman many moons ago, and as these things go, word got out. we'll call this woman "Gina". I was in my early 20's at the time. anyway, everywhere I went, I bumped into someone who had been with Gina ("oh sh!t, you were with Gina! that girl's a freak! me and Tom double- teamed her at John's house...." that type of thing. from shady characters. maybe 4-5 times I heard similar stories. it put the fear of god into me)

and suddenly I was convinced I had aids...

looking back it seems sort of arbitrary. I mean, if that happened today id be more concerned about herpes or something. but I skipped all the lower level stuff and went straight to aids. thing is, back then you had to wait 3 months since your last contact before you could be tested. and wait I did. I sat in my room and drank pot after pot of coffee, sweating profusely, rarely leaving, staring out my window at nothing in particular...contemplating the disease-ridden sexless life I was sure I had ahead of me. before this incident id never given STD's a thought..but now I was mysteriously consumed with them...aids in particular. it was extremely traumatic. anyway, long story short, it ruined sex for me for years. I was terrified. and some of that residual fear still exists to this day, unfortunately. it doesn't stop me, mind you...;)

well, off topic rant alert. sorry folks. I guess im in a confessional mood.

oh, and I don't have aids, in case youre wondering.


back on topic...

[DNA]

I feel your pain Mike.

I absolutely fit into your criteria, but we would have to insert a choice G.

G. For me would be I'm empathic and emotionally available to a fault. I found out through a series of early relationships that long lasting intimate relationships leave me devastated and almost unable to function in day to day society for months afterwards. You ever see the movie "Swingers"? You know the character played by Jon Favrea? I'm that guy. So in order to protect myself I incorporated the "3" rule.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByPzzT9ScFA

G. The three rule.
In order to prevent energetic attachments that form through sex whether you intend them to or not, I had a rule. This rule stated that by the time I had slept with a women three times, I had to make my mind up as to whether or not I saw a potential life mate in the woman. If I did not see the potential for a life long relationship, I would terminate the sexual side of the relationship. This would then end potential damage done to myself and the woman I was dating. When my friends would would ask for an explanation for my actions I would answer them " Do not be careless with people's hearts and do not tolerate others being careless with yours".

[Natalia]

ilook, theres definitely a direct relationship to a deep interest in aliens and conspiracy and a woeful inability to get laid;). this is self evident. this is going to sound very simplistic, but I think people take an interest in this stuff sometimes because they cant get laid. its a sort of consolation prize. in general, folks come to the material discussed on the forum because first and foremost they have the time to do so. what does this mean? it means youre either A. out of work, B. have recently been dumped, C. have not been in a serious relationship for a very long time, D. youre a social misfit, E. youre current relationship sucks, or F. youre kind of old and have lost interest in intimacy/relationships with the opposite sex, G. all of the above. but no matter how you cut it, you have excessive time...

and why do you have time? well, see A, B, C, D, E, and F

and here's the kicker: once you "awaken" you've only further alienated yourself from the rest of society, so your previously poor chances of getting laid have now only gotten worse. I had to explain this to a young man here once; he'd started a thread about striking out, and it was clear that his passion for ufology was a detriment to his er....social life. my advice: leave the aliens at home for the first few dates. let her like you first....then tell her you think youre a hybrid alien from the lower 4th dimension;).


the first reaction that I had to that (other than giggles) is "I can get laid!" "over 700 men on the dating site want to meet me..."...lol

Then I realized, actually, I can't get laid - because I just can't do casual sex, and those guys on that dating site pressed want to meet me just from my (recent) photo...it shocked me at first but then I thought, it's just because I am a woman who put her best recent photo up and lots of girls get that...most of those men just click want to meet and don't send a message (which sais something to me...) and I can't see who liked me anyway because I am on the free version, only how many want to meet me, I can only see messages...)...quite a few men messaged me, and although I didn't tell them that I am an alien (lol) I did tell this one guy who was about to set up a date with me that I had CFS and POTS, because I will tell every guy that before I go on a date with him as it's only fair (I joined a dating site again in December). He was all understanding about it and said he will be in touch soon with that date, and I never heard from him again. I respected his choice. I did date this other guy a few weeks ago and the date went quite well, he was a nice and interesting guy, into spirituality and personal growth, and he seemed ok with the CFS and dizzyness, and other things about me. We connected quite well and at the end of the date he said ("you are quite unusual/weird, I like that, nothing worse than being plane/normal")...and that kind of surprised me, too...and the fact that he wanted to meet up with me again, surprised me...(I don't have super confidence with men, but giving it a chance).

[Natalia]

I feel your pain Mike.

I absolutely fit into your criteria, but we would have to insert a choice G.

G. For me would be I'm empathic and emotionally available to a fault. I found out through a series of early relationships that long lasting intimate relationships leave me devastated and almost unable to function in day to day society for months afterwards. You ever see the movie "Swingers"? You know the character played by Jon Favrea? I'm that guy. So in order to protect myself I incorporated the "3" rule.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByPzzT9ScFA

G. The three rule.
In order to prevent energetic attachments that form through sex whether you intend them to or not, I had a rule. This rule stated that by the time I had slept with a women three times, I had to make my mind up as to whether or not I saw a potential life mate in the woman. If I did not see the potential for a life long relationship, I would terminate the sexual side of the relationship. This would then end potential damage done to myself and the woman I was dating. When my friends would would ask for an explanation for my actions I would answer them " Do not be careless with people's hearts and do not tolerate others being careless with yours".

I respect you for not wanting to mess with women's hearts...there is also a plus side to your empathic attachment and that is that most women want a deep connection with their partner, so when (or if) you meet the right one, they will be lucky to have that and you won't have to try and be (so) careful with their heart (that you break it off) because you will know that she is the right person (ok, that is what I hope for you, hehe).

Reminds me of this song (which I love)

Ca95KaWAWM0

[gripreaper]

my advice: leave the aliens at home for the first few dates. let her like you first....then tell her you think youre a hybrid alien from the lower 4th dimension;).

You mean I should remove from my dating profile that I'm from the Andromeda galaxy and am a hybrid Mantid? Is it not good to have that next to my lack of employment history, my lack of personal hygiene, and my lack of other sentient souls in my life? Is that why I get no responses? :)

[Natalia]

my advice: leave the aliens at home for the first few dates. let her like you first....then tell her you think youre a hybrid alien from the lower 4th dimension;).

You mean I should remove from my dating profile that I'm from the Andromeda galaxy and am a hybrid Mantid? Is it not good to have that next to my lack of employment history, my lack of personal hygiene, and my lack of other sentient souls in my life? Is that why I get no responses? :)

lol :)

... ...

[DNA]

Thanks Amethyst, I'm married with a 2 year old and one on the way. I feel blessed and I believe holding out for the right person is absolutely worth it. My wife's my best friend.
For the record I view synchronicities as communication from angelic folks who are looking out for your best interest. I've always taken such things into account and I've never been steered wrong. I may not always hear what I want but I've never been steered wrong.

[Karma Ninja]

This book/movie is a way of weakening the divine power of women by further reducing them (and men) into objects of lust and desire. The key word being 'objects'. A healthy person can be okay with the commonly accepted male and female roles, where a man can be in control of a sexual situation and a woman enjoy being submissive. However that is not what is being portrayed in this book or the movie. The female lead character has her innocence exploited and is made to endure pain from her partner in order to achieve sexual satisfaction. She ultimately decides in the end that the male lead is too violent for her to continue the relationship. This movie promotes violence against women and twists vulnerable minds away from our connection to love and the power of a loving connection. In my opinion, this film fits into the category of porn and creates unrealistic and unhealthy models for young people to follow and further distances young people from being able to make a healthy loving connection. If a young man experiments with this level of sexuality early, in an immature and unhealthy way, then he will have trouble achieving the same pleasure from his erotic/sexual experiences. Where will this individual be decades later? What lengths will they need to go to to achieve a similar level of excitement and satisfaction? At what cost?

This movie is a cancer to society as it promotes a weakening of our relationships, a loss of intimacy and love, and replaces it with reckless degradation and violence against women. I truly believe this movie is just another in the long list of signs that our western society is in total decline. Young minds are perverted by the message and imagery in a movie like this and it only serves to move us away from our destiny. The Marquis de Sade, Caligula and the elites of this world have latched onto this behaviour for centuries, and we should be moving away from it not embracing it. It's supposed to be sexual evolution not revolution!

That being said, there is nothing wrong with wrapping your hands around a womans and pinning her down while you make love to her. Heck, get out the neckties and give her a little slap if she asks you to, but make sure it is all done with consent and within the confines of security and trust. There is nothing wrong with pushing the limits of intimacy with a healthy relationship. Build up a sweat and make it an experience! I'm all for a little heated fun and action with my lover but I despise this type of pornography which delivers a hyper-confusing message with no context and aims it at a young group already distanced from true love and intimacy.

I might be getting a little old or even old-fashioned but this is how I feel these days. We're supposed to become more in tune with universal love and harmony and not narcissistic pleasure slaves whose value comes from jabbing objects into our various orifices.

(Steps off the soap box...)

[Natalia]

Why don't people trust people more? Is this film going to destroy people? Is an experimental sexual relationship going to ruin that person and their relationships for the rest of their lives? I am not talking about abuse but willing sexual experimentation. Again, the woman in the movie had the choice and she wanted to experiment. I know plenty of women who would never do that. So what was it about the young lady in the film that wanted to do that?

And I do wonder, although some BDSM relationships are not well connected to true and deep love, isn't the same true with non BDSM (they say, vanila) relationships? And what about those relationships that are abusive but there is no BDSM?

I am pretty sure that at least some truly loving relationships can have a mild (or stronger?) BDSM aspect to it...I don't see it as one or the other, either divine and connected deep true love, or lusty dominant and submissive love, can't there be a combination of the 2?

[witchy1]

I tried to read the book to see what the fuss was about and struggled throgh the first few chapters before throwing it away. I was amazed at its popularity and how many women found total domination appealing - anyway to each his own. I then did some research and became concerned about by comments from some psychologists articles who were active in child abuse.....which I have looked for tonight and cannot be found.

The tenor was that if you changed the age of the female in the books to 12 and not 21 you have the perfect pedophile guide on how to seduce a child. Now Im not a pedophile and Í could not finish reading the book (mostly because of how it was written) but it made sense and I am an advocate of "hidden in plain sight

"The calling each other baby, the baby oil used during sex, the pigtails worn by the female character, the remarks about skipping and cartwheels ... [Grey] telling her she is a child, how naive she is, how innocent she is, he tells her when to sleep, how to eat, dress, act ... she doesn't even know how to work a computer properly even though the author gave her the age of 21, take away that fake ID age of 21, and the girl in 50 Shades is exactly that. She's a little girl."

After a review of the language used in the book, and having done research on pedophiles, we agree. We would be hard-pressed to claim that the trilogy is anything but a sick story of an adult 27-year-old male dominating through coercion, sex, and complete control a young lady claiming to be 21 years old but who acts and talks like a child.

Chronological age doesn't determine maturity as much as emotional age does, so the fact that Grey "enslaves" a childlike Anastasia presents us with enough evidence to show we're not dealing with just another erotic novel.

"One of the most freakish lines is in the epilogue of the third book, Freed. Grey and Ana are discussing the baby in her womb, and the baby's movement makes Ana say, "... she likes sex already." How quaint: the child in utero is already sexually charged."





The only article I could find tonight was this,and the links in it no longer working:
http://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2012/09/50_shades_of_grey_trilogy_normalizing_child_sex_abuse.html

[Natalia]

So should women like her not be loved?

[elearah]

What I don´t like about this book is the trend it created and the message transmitted from it. It is not a great book, it is so-so. Would have it alone gain the popularity it did? Or is it a propaganda machine behind?
From this, thousands of books were released copying the formula to certain extent. The main message: if you ever want to be with one of the elite, be ready to be under a domination relationship, never expect respect or love...
And the worst part is: once the trend was installed, you have lots and lots of women willing to accept the deal.
Who´s winning here? Who´s losing?

[lastlegs]

The child in utero is already sexually charged.

This a true statement. We now have many sonograms showing male babies in utero masturbating. It appears to be a naturally human thing.

[Mike]

ive read bits and pieces of the book. the book's popularity truly confuses me. its really no different than the stories you might read in a nudie mag or something. its basically made soft porn acceptable for middle aged women who are too proud or feel too guilty to simply watch it on the internet.

I find the only people it offends are strict religionists or people who cant get laid. (and those types are usually one and the same) plain n simple. its just a popular reminder of all their deficiencies....so they find endless reasons to declare it "bad". for example, we recently had a thread about the super bowl here. there have been other sports related threads, and I guarantee you not a single one of the posters declaring sports morally unsound or illuminatti-backed were ever any good at them. if they were, theyd be singing a different tune.

its the same with this 50 Shades thing. I see the criticism more as a form of suppression. the sex acts in the movie/book are like money - not good or evil in and of themselves, but instead subject to the people doing/using them. if you want to say its degrading to women, we'd also have to say its degrading to men. its a silly debate anyhow when 2 consenting adults are involved.

besides, its a lousy book anyway. I can see why people might worry over the msg of the movie, especially as it relates to young people...but there are far worse things to worry about imo. I highly doubt there will be an army of pedophiles declaring this their new holy book or something. its simply the new "it" thing, and when its not, it'll fade. then we can all breath a sigh of relief and worry about the false flag alien attack we love to worry about so much

[Elainie]

I don't agree with the assessment that those who can't get laid are the one's having an issue with this book/film/deliberate Hollywood hype production. We've been dominated by a patriarchal society and this just keeps the wheels spinning.

[DeDukshyn]

From the article:

The female character has no sexual experience. None. She is given the age of 21, but that age is itself a cover. Her true emotional age is much-much younger. She has never even masturbated. She has never even experienced an orgasm. That alone is one of the greatest attractions to the pedophile. That is the psychology of that kind of act. You get off on taking purity.

So does that mean that I was with a pedo?
Really?, didn't give it up till i was 20, didn't bother with the other stuff till 25. strictly speaking didn't feel the need to.

I won't even get into the other personal aspects, If this be the case then I know a lot of pedos out there, and I am sure many others do as well.

I guess saving yourself for later in life creates pedos ... ? :confused: Let's quickly tell all our kids to have sex early so as not to create anymore pedos! We have to stop this epidemic!! :P

My broader guess is that the fascination with it has grown into fantasy created by some to extend their hatred. People have emotional responses, then look for things to justify those feelings. No offense to anyone intended, but this is how things work. Sometimes in the looking for those justifications, we can get really creative.

[Hummingbird]

Dot Connection

The Reason why 81 million people flocked to see

As a species we are being attacked on every level. Our endocrine system is under attack threw food(Gmo and estrogen mimickers), Big Pharma, household products(johnson &johnson etc very high in phalates and fragrances, hair and body soap, deodorant, flouride toothpaste( with flouridated water to brush with) a lil make up( horrible for your skin and yes more chemicals that create estrogen dominance) then 3-4 cups of non organic coffee with some high fructose syrup creamer. I think you get my point, that unless you are making a concerted effort to be very aware of all these problems(which i would say 90% of america is not) than you do have a disrupted edocrine system and are for certain estrogen dominant.

Why does this matter? I am well researched on the topic.. Male or Female an estrogen dominant body is a unhealthy body,probobly retaining to much fat.
So here is the first issue: True genuine sexual attraction to your partner , most men gauk at any woman who is height weight proportinate, and most woman dont show there sexual urges cuz they dont want to piss off there fat lazy husband.. So instead of Living Life Aggresively and figuring out why they arnt happy, facing the facts... People will just rather lie to each other be dishonest about there true wants and feelings and desires..
Second issue A dilusional idea of what you need to be sexaul fulfilled:

What does this steam into.... Sexual deviancy

Youll notice in the movie 50 shades they use attractive fit people for the roles or else people will not even watch. The Reality is balanced humans, humans that are eating quality nutrition, practicing meditaion, yoga, excercise,people that shine and draw all attention in the room, These Humans dont have the urge for deviancy, why because there dopamine levels in the brain are balanced.
There has been studies done on rapists, serial killers etc and there hormone profile/brain chemistry is all out of whack

Look at the some pictures of pedo's they are the other end of the spectrum from a human becoming.

"The very word secracy is repugnant in a free and open society"

This is why they killed him by firing squad in Dallas, because the realization that all evil and darkness is birthed out of secracy and deciet is something the masses are not aloud to know.

People have the right to privacy but if we could rid our planet of so much secracy(Et's/chemtrails/gmo/vaccines/occult birthing and death rituals/pedophila/satism/HIStory etc etc) then maybe we could be reconnected with are galactic brethren. But when 81 million of us come up with rationalizaions to support secret occultic behavoir instead of figuring out why our sex lives arnt fulfilling to us well... here we go hold the flag :)

[Hummingbird]

Humans are more confused then ever and the loving NWO is right there to guide our victomhood mantalities and if we will let them they will guide us right down the path to despotism.
Which right now is being so cunningly executed threw political correctness that the masses lap it up

[witchy1]

So should women like her not be loved?
What is woman like her?
I wasn't going to dignify your question with an answer - however I am more than happy to be proved wrong.
Can you point me to any part in the book that describe a reciprocal relationship based on mutual trust, sharing, understanding and acceptance of each other. Or any other part of the book where Christians activites show love.
Is the book really about love Amethyst? The psychologists working in child abuse describe Christians activities as being classic pedophilia. Change her age to 12. This is - according to the professionals - the sicko's guide on how to be one.

Needless to say, Every one should be loved - no one should be enslaved!

Last legs - I am aware of unborn children in utero. My point was (and I should have made it clearer) given one accepts she is with a pedophile, is that she has pretty much handed over her unborn daughter to her captor / predator. It is written "she enjoys sex already" this is not reference to primal urge that you are talking about. She is talking about her unborn daughter enjoying sex (as in man woman consenting sex)

For the record I am not some religious frigid crazy-o (before anyone starts mud slinging because I disagree with them)

[Natalia]

So should women like her not be loved?
What is woman like her?
I wasn't going to dignify your question with an answer - however I am more than happy to be proved wrong.
Can you point me to any part in the book that describe a reciprocal relationship based on mutual trust, sharing, understanding and acceptance of each other. Or any other part of the book where Christians activites show love.
Is the book really about love Amethyst? The psychologists working in child abuse describe Christians activities as being classic pedophilia. Change her age to 12. This is - according to the professionals - the sicko's guide on how to be one.

Needless to say, Every one should be loved - no one should be enslaved!

It might have seemed like a silly question (and I can understand that)

To me it's quite simple, pedophilia is sex with a child, not an adult, if 2 adults are having mutually wanted sex together then it's not child abuse. If there was any abuse, it could only be adult abuse because they are both adults...no matter what role play they do...

I think that in the case of 50 shades of grey, acting like the woman is being abused and is a total victim, is an insult to her and not respecting her, like she is a little child and not a woman (ironically...)...some people are missing a point that she actually wants to explore sexually with mr grey...she is intrigued, she is curious, she is in love and lust with him, she is excited and scared at the same time, it's a big adventure for her...one that she feels she cannot help so she follows her feelings...there is a reason why they got together...what good is there from their relationship? (as well as the seemingly obvious to some people "bad"?)

I do however see how changing her age to 12 (which I did not know until you mentioned it) can seem a bit sick or creepy...I don't fully understand it...it seems to me to be more of an extreme way of role playing dominant and submissive sexually...I have a little girl inside of me...and she can be a big part of my personality sometimes (as well as the more mature woman part...)...and I would love my partner to love her as part of my whole...(I personally am more sexually attracted to men who are around my age or older...)...some guys are put off by her, but I found that the men who really made me feel loved, wanted and not wrong, loved her too...I have a guy friend who really helped my healing and to feel a bit more confident about myself in this way...

I am going to leave this thread now, I feel that I have expressed myself quite a bit and don't want to go round in circles and overly post and pay too much attention to it. Time for me to move on.

I believe in love, but we all have some different ideas of what love is...

(edit, have just read this: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/11409831/50-Shades-of-Grey-Protect-Britains-women-from-this-sick-filth.html)

[Flash]

The child in utero is already sexually charged.

This a true statement. We now have many sonograms showing male babies in utero masturbating. It appears to be a naturally human thing.

They also suck their tumb. Does that means anything sexual? Children neurology is not developed engough at birth to identifiy with what they are living/feeling. what you describe has zero sexual connotation for them, it is just sensing one's body.

But, a pedophile will tell you that the child he abused liked it and was ready for it, in fact, it was consensual (consented). He will say the child is already sexually charged. Therefore no harm there. And the child will have a mix of pleasure (as when he sensed his body at birth) and disgust or unease, dislike. This is what most victims say.

[Agape]

What I don´t like about this book is the trend it created and the message transmitted from it. It is not a great book, it is so-so. Would have it alone gain the popularity it did? Or is it a propaganda machine behind?
From this, thousands of books were released copying the formula to certain extent. The main message: if you ever want to be with one of the elite, be ready to be under a domination relationship, never expect respect or love...
And the worst part is: once the trend was installed, you have lots and lots of women willing to accept the deal.
Who´s winning here? Who´s losing?


I think it's more likely what the movie is actually about ... the absurdity of ''inter-class'' relationship rather than sexuality in itself ,
I was curious .. watched most of it on computer ( save for the last 20 minutes ..I find the explicit imagery disturbing ) .

For most part ..I think it's well played , romantic movie ( even while the main character insists on 'no romance' ) ,
I don't see the scenes as 'too obscene' , I think they're actually quite sensitively played .
I think there's a message in the movie ... a warning ... in my opinion ...

now if you think the main character ( girl ) had a choice , you have too , you can see the movie , understand the message , say yes or no , that's your choice .

It's not really about sex in my opinion , it could be about cloth or cookies or any nice quirks any super-rich millionaire has had and enjoys entirely ( or thinks he does ) at that time period , without reflecting deeper on where his life is taking off ..

it's a movie about the absurdity and yes , exploitation of unequal social relationships of people who are so ( anything = rich, high, smart, famous ..in their own eyes ) that they realise they have no equals .
Moreover , they can 'buy' others ( those who are willing ) to modern type of submission,
this is not a fiction . They can't afford true love ( but pray .. sure , there are many forms of love and who am i to suggest theirs aren't true ) and some are as unlucky as anyone else in finding it .

The message is ...in my opinion ... this type of 'social pattern' is on increase, paradoxically , in the type of 'western society' we adhere to , society who shun slavery and social inequality and what else you have ,
due to this new 'rich class' of young billionaires and their kids who can afford about anything and grow up in strictly 'positive ' environment , success oriented , success granted .

I think it's ( maybe ) revelation type of movie - admitting this type of behaviour exists , it's being practised among 'consensual adults' and young people should be aware that this is not 'your best choice' , morally taken .


:angel:

[Flash]

I found your post and descriptive here very funny. And somewhat true. I decided last spring, heavily pushed by some Avalonian friends, to end up the celibacy as well as getting a job, which I recently lost / - and I have been less present on the forum since, except for this week lollll. So funny truth here in your post. But for the first part, no regrets at all, not for one minute.

However, the interest in that stuff as you say dates back from my 6 years old curiosity. At 6, you do not even think sex exist.

well,

I have the strange feeling that if you were putting your post as is, on a dating site, you would attract the just right one, who could match this post: well spoken, funny, down to earth, much too truthful , bits weird and without venereal disease.




im really enjoying this thread;) and not because im a twisted pervert either (tho I am)...its due mainly to feeling the collective squirm with each and every post. what can i say? its giving me great satisfaction!

look, theres definitely a direct relationship to a deep interest in aliens and conspiracy and a woeful inability to get laid;). this is self evident. this is going to sound very simplistic, but I think people take an interest in this stuff sometimes because they cant get laid. its a sort of consolation prize. in general, folks come to the material discussed on the forum because first and foremost they have the time to do so. what does this mean? it means youre either A. out of work, B. have recently been dumped, C. have not been in a serious relationship for a very long time, D. youre a social misfit, E. youre current relationship sucks, or F. youre kind of old and have lost interest in intimacy/relationships with the opposite sex, G. all of the above. but no matter how you cut it, you have excessive time...

and why do you have time? well, see A, B, C, D, E, and F

and here's the kicker: once you "awaken" you've only further alienated yourself from the rest of society, so your previously poor chances of getting laid have now only gotten worse. I had to explain this to a young man here once; he'd started a thread about striking out, and it was clear that his passion for ufology was a detriment to his er....social life. my advice: leave the aliens at home for the first few dates. let her like you first....then tell her you think youre a hybrid alien from the lower 4th dimension;).

anyway, if you think im being hard on the forum, keep in mind that im an active participant on it too. in fact, im probably a 'C' from my list up above. and since I hate condoms but am terrified of sexually transmitted diseases, ive wound up in this weird sexual wasteland where I go long periods without intimacy....even tho I have women literally throwing themselves at my feet hehe:p not true, unfortunately. true at one time maybe...well, nevermind, im digging myself a hole here....:p

what happened to me was this: I was intimate with a young woman many moons ago, and as these things go, word got out. we'll call this woman "Gina". I was in my early 20's at the time. anyway, everywhere I went, I bumped into someone who had been with Gina ("oh sh!t, you were with Gina! that girl's a freak! me and Tom double- teamed her at John's house...." that type of thing. from shady characters. maybe 4-5 times I heard similar stories. it put the fear of god into me)

and suddenly I was convinced I had aids...

looking back it seems sort of arbitrary. I mean, if that happened today id be more concerned about herpes or something. but I skipped all the lower level stuff and went straight to aids. thing is, back then you had to wait 3 months since your last contact before you could be tested. and wait I did. I sat in my room and drank pot after pot of coffee, sweating profusely, rarely leaving, staring out my window at nothing in particular...contemplating the disease-ridden sexless life I was sure I had ahead of me. before this incident id never given STD's a thought..but now I was mysteriously consumed with them...aids in particular. it was extremely traumatic. anyway, long story short, it ruined sex for me for years. I was terrified. and some of that residual fear still exists to this day, unfortunately. it doesn't stop me, mind you...;)

well, off topic rant alert. sorry folks. I guess im in a confessional mood.

oh, and I don't have aids, in case youre wondering.


back on topic...

[Agape]

look, theres definitely a direct relationship to a deep interest in aliens and conspiracy and a woeful inability to get laid;). this is self evident.

I'm sure there's a secret - and sacred - connection between the two instances .. ;) but from my ET in human body perspective .. it's certainly not about 'getting laid' .

I remember I put that question up to mum when I was about 4 or 5 year old , of course , twice more curious that time than I am , about how children come to life ?
Of course I knew already they are born from mums womb and I browsed through some of the anatomy books too but the whole thing still did not make good sense to me .
I don't think mum wanted to explain the whole process to 4 year old so she told me it's by parents 'wish' how children come to being and I was very satisfied with that answer .
Child born when parents wish .. made sense .

The whole mystery persisted till much later because our first grade school and teachers were extremely old stylish and I was actually punished for reading certain adult books including the 'Head to Toe' anatomy , in that age .
When girls talked about 'how it's done' , at summer camp ..i was around 8 or 9 , i did not believe them . I thought they're making the thing up to sound interesting .
It sounded coarse and rough . And rude . I questioned mum about it , soon as i could and to my great disappointment I was confirmed that this is the truth of 'child making' on Earth .

The problem is .. 30 years later .. the whole feeling about it is alien to me . A lump of 'other life' growing in your belly ,
no we don't have that in our own civilisation . Sex is about love .. but growing new life in your body ..is something I find difficult to swallow , personally .

The whole thing about Life on Earth misses depths in many cases , in my opinion, and woeful commitment .

So no , 'getting laid' is far from being a treat . Being loved , yes , completely but what ways , at what cost ?


It's said 'love has wings' . Yes it does .. if you can lift yourself beyond and above of who you are , and insist to be .

....

[Flash]

Interesting Agape. We may get a bit away from the OP intent, because here I do not want to talk of pedophilia, but to talk instead about how weird and strange this sex without love or specific energetic intent feels to me on this planet.

I have learned that I have a body which perceives and live through its senses. HOwever, up to 11-12 years old, i could not imagine, even if I knew already how human babies were made, I could not imagine it in a purely physical level. To me, it did not make sense. I thought babies had to be made through energetic exchanges and a common purpose/intent, first of all. In my world, sex was an energetic kind of fusion first of all, and 100 times more powerful/interesting/fulfilling than in human form. Babies were conceived that way. In this way, rape or pedophilia just plainly could not exist.

But hey, I am here, so I learned the human way and did the human way. But I am still often baffled by the primitivity of our state of being.

[Agape]

Interesting Agape. We may get a bit away from the OP intent, because here I do not want to talk of pedophilia, but to talk instead about how weird and strange this sex without love or specific energetic intent feels to me on this planet.

I have learned that I have a body which perceives and live through its senses. HOwever, up to 11-12 years old, i could not imagine, even if I knew already how human babies were made, I could not imagine it in a purely physical level. To me, it did not make sense. I thought babies had to be made through energetic exchanges and a common purpose/intent, first of all. In my world, sex was an energetic kind of fusion first of all, and 100 times more powerful/interesting/fulfilling than in human form. Babies were conceived that way. In this way, rape or pedophilia just plainly could not exist.

But hey, I am here, so I learned the human way and did the human way. But I am still often baffled by the primitivity of our state of being.


I tend to think about the whole topic in terms of instinctive behaviour native to certain biological level of existence - that includes socialising , maternal ( rarely also paternal ) instincts , survival , competition , selectivity , and so forth

versus higher ethical and social behaviour : love , compassion, caring , being responsible to your society etc .

and in context of this movie I think that humans are learning tough lesson here . The 'higher' you move on the societal scale the amount of laws , rules and responsibilities increases , yes maybe with what some see as 'more freedoms' but losing many other freedoms as well ,
they're building all kinds of systems , so far has been built to 'enslave' people as a means to control and educate them about their instincts and the need to proceed above ..it's a forceful and coercive process in total ,
the question remains , how fast would humanity evolve without such coercion ,

if we talk of energies and redirecting 'the force' from bellow to above ... from being a victim of your 'genetic make-up' to being a conqueror of yourself , mind over matter ,

it is not always smooth and not without pain .


There's this metaphor of extremely wealthy young man who has his 'control room' , reminds me of the 13th chamber of some fairytales ,
conveying a message ..you can be one of us but HAVE to go to the gym and do what we tell you to do ,
and trust you will be 'better being' at the end ?

Who is this 'better being' at his end ... one who can't be manipulated by instincts ( because those had been satisfied ) or emotions ,
because 'emotions' are not an objective criterium in 'his world' , the future world full of machines and AI ,

world where you don't have - or even can't do- anything because you're 'being done' from end to the beginning ,

it's a step forwards , certainly ( dear humanity ) but misses loftier goal ..


sorry i did not mean to interrupt your debate



:angel:

[magnum]

the sexual impulse and energy is the easiest thing for the controllers to manipulate and FEED ON..distorting healthy sexuality and the relationships between men and women is one of the most powerful ways to keep humanity stuck in sexual misery and disconnection....and then along comes "50 shades of grey"..pretty obvious agenda in that programming

..then there is the obvious SATANIC practice of rewiring the nervous systems pleasure-pain centers so that people start to experience pleasure when they are in pain..welcome to the world of BDSM..the satanic-luciferian forces get great pleasure out of pain and if you do the same you are starting to blend with the satanic-luciferian force.

[Aspen]

Another point of view would be that the adult male person in this relationship had been hurt by the trauma of childhood sexual abuse. If he had healed from the trauma of the sexually abusive relationship that occurred while he was a teenager, then maybe he could have become capable of the relationship the main character, the 21 year old female, was looking for. As a trauma therapist I have met men who were sexually abused around puberty and beyond. It is not unusual for a pedophile to take advantage of the raging hormones of an adult male going through puberty and to groom them into participating in sexual activities that primarily serve the needs of the adult. In the research done on childhood sexual abuse, it has been discovered that many children are abused by the same person over a period of years. So indirectly the book IS about pedophiles. It is a story about the long term harm that can occur as a result of sexual abuse. About 25% of all women have been sexually abused before the age of 18 and they can testify to the fact that sexual abuse can have a negative impact on your adult sexuality. A sexual relationship between emotionally healthy adults can be so much more. I believe that this type of entertainment is a way of preventing the spiritual level union that can and should occur by degrading sexuality.

[magnum]

yeah..I agree with most of that.Another thing to consider is that men and women are conditioned to think that if they just find the right partner all their problems will be solved and they will live happily ever after...this is programmed into us from as soon as we can read with all the fairytales etc.

The thing is that both sides of the relationship in this movie are emotionally very fractured and are going to attract broken people..so this statement you made was interesting Aspen

"If he had healed from the trauma of the sexually abusive relationship that occurred while he was a teenager, then maybe he could have become capable of the relationship the main character, the 21 year old female, was looking for"

..it may be wiser for that emotionally fragmented female to do some more inner work and not be "looking for" someone to come and save her..the same old programming.

[magnum]

http://illuminatiwatcher.com/mkultra-mind-control-symbolism-fifty-shades-grey-film/

"The symbolism I saw in the film was that of mind control. The dominant handler (Christian Grey) was definitely playing mind games with this innocent young girl."

[Aspen]

Hi Magnum, I thought it was interesting what you said about the Satanic Luciferian forces getting great pleasure of the pain and that they would like to see us do the same. As a little girl I was tied to a tree after being beaten by a 14 year old and he started to do sexual things, but fortunately he was stopped. Just this one act changed my life and sometimes during sex I am triggered into flashbacks and it is like you say that sometimes things get turned around and the pain is connected with pleasure. Receiving pain at the same time as receiving pleasure is kind of a metaphor for the society we live in today. Many people spend hours on video games where they are killing others and they learn to receive a kind of pleasure from it. Even all the crime shows, westerns, horror movies etc. are quite similar. We are continually being traumatized in the media. Even just watching the news and yet we are expected to have a sense of exhilaration and satisfaction linked to these horrible images. Lately I have been watching the Netflix series "The 100." My husband and I both find it uncomfortably intense. He was saying he knows of few shows where it is normal to blood on your face throughout the show.

As far as the young woman in The 50 Shades of Grey being fractured, I wouldn't know - as I didn't watch the show. When I wrote the above excerpt it was with the assumption that many men and women are sexually attracted to someone on a physical level and sometimes allow themselves to get involved sexually before they really get to know the character of the person. We are attracted to people on a chemical biological level. It is one aspect of attraction. I assumed that this was the case in this story. I know in my practice as a trauma therapist that about 25 percent of all women have been sexually abused before age 18 and so many are fractured. It is more than just the programming of the media, although that also reinforces the messages of submission and control that the Luciferian agenda loves. It is great to see any efforts to teach youth the ideal of a romantic relationship between equals. The minister that did our premarital counselling taught us that we need to give to each other 100 percent in order to keep the relationship strong. And thankfully I am married to a gentle soul and we do give 100% to the relationship. It has undone a lot of harm from the past. I think the programming could quickly be turned around if healthier people had influence over the media agenda and the education system. Thankfully some still do!

[Flash]

the sexual impulse and energy is the easiest thing for the controllers to manipulate and FEED ON..distorting healthy sexuality and the relationships between men and women is one of the most powerful ways to keep humanity stuck in sexual misery and disconnection....and then along comes "50 shades of grey"..pretty obvious agenda in that programming

..then there is the obvious SATANIC practice of rewiring the nervous systems pleasure-pain centers so that people start to experience pleasure when they are in pain..welcome to the world of BDSM..the satanic-luciferian forces get great pleasure out of pain and if you do the same you are starting to blend with the satanic-luciferian force.

I have been told by someone in this forum - and it makes sense to me - that to get to mind control someone you have to mix in pain, pleasure and love. At that point it is a definite hook for control.

[Star Tsar]

It is child porn. Kiddie porn.

I don't think there is such thing as child "porn". Porn is consentual, Abuse is not sorry for nitpicking but I feel its an important distinction.

[shadowstalker]

https://scontent-lga.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/10994055_10153091960723480_3187384905014958842_n.jpg?oh=394b7985b87c6112d9eab8134a1ecec2&oe=555598D1

[avid]

Why are we 'compelled' to watch controversial 'pornography'? This film has gone viral, so was the book, do we really need this 'kick-up-the-btm' to keep reminding us to be mind-controlled in our every-day lives? This is a WAKE-UP CALL to see that we are so gullible, and can grovel at the feet of the extreme media, whether in our best interests or not.

[Anchor]

For your interest:

I will link the source, but it is from an internet pornography site so I wont make it easy for you to click. www. p o r n hub.com/insights/50-shades-bdsm-searches/


Cinema has come to affect our lives and views in real and meaningful ways. For instance, after the release of the film Sideways, Merlot became more difficult to move off of shelves while Pinot Noir enjoyed a 16% spike in sales. Deer hunting decreased by nearly half for a few years after Bambi. In the same vein, the recent release of the film adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey has been shaking things up over here at Pornhub. Specifically, people are getting freakier in their pornographic preferences and we’ve got the data to prove it.

There’s no real debate here; since the now infamous film was released over Valentine’s Day weekend, BDSM related searches have seen a significant increase on Pornhub. The charts below trace BDSM related searches during the days leading up to and then immediately following the film’s February 13th release date. When comparing this activity in the US to the rest of the world as well as to women versus men, the specific traffic patterns follow the same general rises and falls, with a few exceptions. Overall, it seems that the press tour leading up to the premiere helped things along a little, with a decent increase in BDSM searches having been observed the weekend before, over the 6th through the 8th of February.

The 13th marks the real threshold though, with searches for words like ‘submission,’ ‘spank,’ and ‘bondage’ among others, increasing in the US by over 20% and by nearly 40% in women. Suffice it to say, our female users have definitely been channeling their inner Anastasia Steele’s.
.
.


(BTW: In case you were wondering, I found this through reddit and not by browsing porn !)

[shadowstalker]

25 Facts About BDSM That You Won’t Learn In “Fifty Shades Of Grey” (http://www.buzzfeed.com/caseygueren/ultimate-guide-to-bdsm)

1. First things first: Here’s what BDSM actually stands for:

BDSM includes bondage and discipline (B&D), dominance and submission (D&S), and sadism & masochism (S&M). The terms are lumped together that way because BDSM can be a lot of different things to different people with different preferences, BDSM writer and educator Clarisse Thorn, author of The S&M Feminist, tells BuzzFeed Life. Most of the time, a person’s interests fall into one or two of those categories, rather than all of them.

2. It doesn’t always involve sex, but it can.

Most people think BDSM is always tied to sex, and while it can be for some people, others draw a hard line between the two. “Both are bodily experiences that are very intense and sensual and cause a lot of very strong feelings in people who practice them, but they’re not the same thing,” says Thorn. The metaphor she uses for it: a massage. Sometimes a massage, however sensual it feels, is just a massage. For others, a rubdown pretty much always leads to sex. It’s kind of similar with BDSM; it’s a matter of personal and sexual preference.

3. There is nothing inherently wrong or damaged with people if they’re into it.

This is one of the most common and frustrating misconceptions about BDSM, says Thorn. BDSM isn’t something that emerges from abuse or domestic violence, and engaging in it does not mean that you enjoy abuse or abusing.

Instead, enjoying BDSM is just one facet of someone’s sexuality and lifestyle. “It’s just regular people who happen to get off that way,” sex expert Gloria Brame, Ph.D., author of Different Loving, tells BuzzFeed Life. “It’s your neighbors and your teachers and the people bagging your groceries. The biggest myth is that you need this special set of circumstances. It’s regular people who have a need for that to be their intimate dynamic.”

4. Know that you can always say no.

“A lot of people starting out think it’s ‘all or nothing,’ especially if you’ve only been with one partner,” says Thorn. For instance, you might think that because you enjoyed being submissive under certain circumstances, that means you must agree to a whole host of submissive or masochistic behaviors that you’re not necessarily into.

But that’s absolutely wrong. You can — and should — pick and choose which BDSM activities you are and are not interested in, says Thorn. And that can vary depending on the situation, the partner, or even the day. Just remember that consent is a requirement in BDSM, and it’s possible to consent to one thing while still objecting to another.

5. BDSMers are just as stable as people who prefer vanilla sex.

“In my experience, it’s easier for people to get into BDSM if they don’t have a history of abuse, people who are in a more stable place in their lives,” says Thorn. A 2008 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that people who had engaged in BDSM in the past year were no more likely to have been coerced into sexual activity and were no more likely to be unhappy or anxious than those who didn’t do BDSM. And actually, men who engaged in BDSM had lower scores of psychological distress than other men.
That said, BDSMers do not judge people who aren’t into it, explains Thorn. The term “vanilla” isn’t meant to be derogatory, just to refer to non-BDSM sexual acts or people who aren’t interested in kink.

6. Fifty Shades of Grey is considered very cringeworthy in the BDSM community.

If you ever find yourself at a BDSM meet-up or dungeon, don’t mention any shade of grey. While some people appreciate that the books spurred more interest in kink and may have made it less stigmatized, others take issue with the abusive, unhealthy relationship it portrays and the seriously unrealistic scenes. All in all, it is not an accurate representation of the BDSM community.

7. It’s not all whips and chains all the time — or ever, if that’s not your thing.

Sure, some S&M enthusiasts might have these in their arsenal, but it’s definitely not everyone’s cup of kink. “Some people go for what’s called ‘sensual dominance,’ which is where there might be some toys or play but no pain involved at all,” says Brame. “It’s more like one partner agrees to do everything the other person asks. BDSM doesn’t have to follow any pattern, and there is no one model for what a BDSM relationship can be.”

8. BDSM encounters are called “scenes.”

Again, since it isn’t always about intercourse, you wouldn’t necessarily say that you “had sex” or “hooked up” with someone after a BDSM experience. Instead, these are called scenes (like, you scened with someone or you had a scene).

“It’s an evolution from a time where, if you did S&M, you might only do it with a professional for an hour, or you might just see it performed at a BDSM club,” says Brame. “Now people have much more organic relationships, but they still call it a scene — the time when we bring out the toys or get into that headspace.”

9. There are dominants, submissives, tops, and bottoms.

So you’ve probably heard about dominants and submissives (if not, the dominant enjoys being in charge, while the submissive enjoys receiving orders). But BDSMers may also use the terms “tops” and “bottoms” to describe themselves. A top could refer to a dominant or a sadist (someone who enjoys inflicting pain), while a bottom could refer to a submissive or a masochist (someone who enjoys receiving pain). This allows you to have a blanket term for those who generally like being on either the giving or receiving end in a BDSM encounter. And there’s no rule that says you can’t be both dominant and submissive in different circumstances or with different partners.

10. It can be as simple or as technical as you want.

Maybe the thought of being tied up excites you, or you enjoy spanking or being spanked. Or maybe you’re more interested in leather masks and nipple clamps and hot wax. All of that (and obviously a lot more) is within the realm of BDSM. Basically, you can still be into kink without actually ever going to a dungeon.

11. Before you go past the VERY basics, do your research.

Using a blindfold or an ice cube or fuzzy handcuffs you got at a bachelorette party are all relatively harmless beginner behaviors if you’re into them. But before you play around with some of the trickier tools, you need to learn how to do so safely. Even a rope or a whip can be dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Hell, you can even mess up with your own hands (think: fisting): “[Some people] think they can clench a fist and stick it inside somebody,” says Brame. “That’s a good way to really injure someone and send them to the hospital.” (Instead, she suggests an “enormous amount of lubricant” and starting with two or three fingers, then slowly and carefully building up to the whole hand.)

12. Seriously, BDSM involves A LOT of reading and learning.

If you’re one of those people who throws away the directions and tries to build the bookshelf on intuition alone, BDSM is probably not for you. “I would say the vast majority of what we call BDSM education is how to maximize ecstasy and minimize risk,” says Brame. “How to do all the things you fantasized about doing and to do them safely.”

While there’s no one required reading list, there seem to be a few favorites that are often recommended to beginners, like SM 101 by Jay Wiseman, Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns, by Phillip Miller and Molly Devon, and The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton. [Editor’s note: Have others you’d suggest? Please add them in the comments!]
Classes, conferences, and meet-ups are also helpful for learning specific techniques, says Thorn. Another popular resource is FetLife.com, a Facebook-like network for the kink community, which can connect you with message boards, groups, and classes in your area.

13. It’s important to get your information from a variety of sources.

One mistake many people make when first experimenting with BDSM is relying on one person to show them the way. Even if they do have your best interest at heart (and they might not), it can be limiting to only have one perspective on something that is so multidimensional, says Thorn. Instead, seek out books, workshops, meet-ups, mentors, friends, message boards, and more to find a safe place to explore your interests.

“When you can’t talk about what’s happening and you can’t make sense of your experience with like-minded people, that’s way more dangerous than the variety of activities you might fantasize about,” says Thorn.

14. Safe words are definitely a thing.

It might sound cheesy, but it’s a well-established norm in BDSM. (And hey, your safe word could actually be “cheesy” if you want. You do you.) “Safe words are probably one of the most important norms that have spread across the community, even if people use them in different ways,” says Thorn. For instance, not everyone uses safe words all the time after a while, but it’s important to start out with them. They can essentially be anything you want, as long as it’s something that you wouldn’t normally say during sex. You can find more info about safe words here.

15. And at some public events, there are even safety monitors on duty.

“Dungeon monitors will kick out people who don’t look like they’re playing safely,” says Brame. This can be anything from ignoring safe words to using a whip incorrectly. Seriously, did we mention that safety is paramount here? In fact, the acronym SSC (safe, sane, consensual) is one of the most common pillars of the practice.

16. It’s not as spontaneous as Hollywood movies or porn make it out to be.

Getting swept up in the moment and accidentally stumbling into a millionaire’s red room (where you’ll have multiple orgasms) is probably not going to happen to you ever. But, that’s not necessarily a bad thing. “The sexual fantasy makes everything look so easy,” says Brame. “People who actually do this stuff are very cautious about it. It has to be the right place and right time and right equipment. And you have to know you can get the person out [of whatever bondage] if there’s an emergency. You have to feel you can trust the person.” So there’s a lot that goes into one scene, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less satisfying for those who enjoy it.

17. There’s also probably way more talking involved than there is with (most) vanilla sex.

Whenever people question the role of consent in BDSM, they should consider the enormous amount of communication that occurs before, during, and after the scenes. “We talk about it hugely before we ever do it,” says Brame. “We talk about what we want to do, what we’re going to do, what our fantasies are… that’s part of negotiating a good relationship as a BDSMer.”

18. There’s actually a pre-negotiation period, where the partners discuss what they like, what they don’t like, and what they absolutely will not tolerate.

Think of this as the primer before the scene. “It’s a way of discussing the experience ahead of time that can increase emotional security,” says Thorn. This can involve anything from scripts and checklists to a more informal discussion of what each person’s expectations are for the scene, what they want and don’t want, and any words or actions that are completely off-limits.

19. And then comes aftercare, the debriefing period that happens once the scene ends.

Since BDSM can be an incredibly intense and emotional experience for some, most experts strongly suggest this wrap-up step, where the partners can discuss the scene and any reactions they had to it. “People are extremely vulnerable during aftercare,” says Thorn. “It can be really weird to have a scene without it.” This can also be a strong bonding experience between the partners.

20. BDSMers can be monogamous, polyamorous, or whatever the hell they want.

Not everyone who’s interested in BDSM has multiple sexual or relationship partners. “It used to be a popular perception that we don’t form long-term relationships,” says Brame. “A lot of BDSMers are just monogamous people. A lot of people just want to do it with their partner or play with the big toys at clubs.”

21. There are so many different types of whips.

This is not a one-size-fits-all kink. There are light floggers, leather whips, whips with single tails, whips with multiple tails that are flat and wide, the list goes on, says Thorn. But because certain types can be harsher than others, you really need to learn how to use them properly (again, workshops are crucial). “People practicing with a single-tail whip will often start with a pillow or some distant small object, like a light switch,” she says.

22. And there are some places that you definitely don’t want to whip.

Like, um, the eyes, obviously. Or the kidney area. “The skin is thin there and you have vital organs under there. You can bruise your kidneys,” explains Brame.

23. If you want to bring it up in your current relationship, absolutely do it.

“There are plenty of stories out there of people who were too nervous to bring it up and then found out that their partner had the same fantasy,” says Thorn. If you’re nervous about it, ask if they’d be interested in checking out a particular book or workshop you heard about. Or just talk about it in the context of sexual fantasies by asking your partner if they’ve ever tried anything like BDSM or if they’ve ever wanted to. If you think about it, you’re only risking one awkward conversation, and the payoff can be huge if this is something you want in your life.

24. There is an immensely helpful list of kink-aware professionals so you can find a doctor or therapist who uniquely understands your lifestyle.

Maybe you’re worried that your gynecologist or your lawyer won’t be sensitive to your lifestyle or doesn’t allow you to feel comfortable talking about it. Check out the Kink Aware Professionals Directory from the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom to find someone who will be more accepting.

25. Basically, it’s way different than most people expect.

Between stereotypes, porn, and Fifty Shades of Grey, there’s a lot of misconceptions about BDSM. Short of attending a workshop or visiting a dominatrix, the best way to learn more about it is to do some research. “Just like with regular sex, if you want to be good at it, you really have to learn about what’s going on when this stuff is happening,” says Brame.

[magnum]

http://www.tosavealife.com/russell-brand-says-porn-shocking-makes-100-perfect-sense/#.VO97vU168AK.facebook

"Russell Brand is about to say something about porn and 50 Shades that every Christian can totally agree with—and it’s kinda amazing. If you’re struggling with a porn addiction share it with a parent, mentor or youth leader–and get help today. Don’t be a slave to this deadly drug. "

[Flash]

25 Facts About BDSM That You Won’t Learn In “Fifty Shades Of Grey” (http://www.buzzfeed.com/caseygueren/ultimate-guide-to-bdsm)

[B]5. BDSMers are just as stable as people who prefer vanilla sex.

Who said non BDSM sex is Vanilla sex?????

Non BDSM sex can get pretty kinky without being BDSM! This title just illustrate how easy it is to corrupt someone's understanding - non BDSM = Vanilla.

Everyone in America associate vanilla anything with dull. you are not doing DBSM sex, therefore you have dull uneventful sex, this is the message!

After Madonna and Britney Spear convincing every teenager girl to try it both ways and declare themselves bisexual, we will now have the BDSM fashion (you do not do it girl, you are not chill).

[DeDukshyn]

25 Facts About BDSM That You Won’t Learn In “Fifty Shades Of Grey” (http://www.buzzfeed.com/caseygueren/ultimate-guide-to-bdsm)

[B]5. BDSMers are just as stable as people who prefer vanilla sex.

Who said non BDSM sex is Vanilla sex?????

Non BDSM sex can get pretty kinky without being BDSM! This title just illustrate how easy it is to corrupt someone's understanding - non BDSM = Vanilla.
...


I think the comparison was not that non-BDSM is vanilla, but that most people who are ok with BDSM are just as stable as those who prefer "vanilla sex" - which I take to mean "missionary only! penis-vagina only! - no deviations!" -- that's pretty vanilla, and boring in my opinion!

I think it is fairly clear that even with the broad range of preferences and limitations, that kinky sex does include BDSM, but sex does not have to incorporate BDSM to be kinky. There's plenty of ways to make sex kinky, fun, exciting and new, without having to engage in BDSM. BDSM just one item of many that tends to fall under the category of "kinky sex".

That's how I read it anyway. ;)

[shadowstalker]

I think the comparison was not that non-BDSM is vanilla, but that most people who are ok with BDSM are just as stable as those who prefer "vanilla sex" - which I take to mean "missionary only! penis-vagina only! - no deviations!" -- that's pretty vanilla, and boring in my opinion!

I think it is fairly clear that even with the broad range of preferences and limitations, that kinky sex does include BDSM, but sex does not have to incorporate BDSM to be kinky. There's plenty of ways to make sex kinky, fun, exciting and new, without having to engage in BDSM. BDSM just one item of many that tends to fall under the category of "kinky sex".

That's how I read it anyway.

I am glad some one explained it. I am not very good in explaining those type of things.

That's the way I read it as well.

[Twig]

I think the books are a good read. Watched the movie last night OR should i say the first part..there is more movies yet to come to finish the story. To me books are always way better than the movies but thats just me..each to their own.

Anything that goes on between two consenting adults is fine. If you look at the whole book story she can walk away anytime she wants but she doesn't.
My belief is that there is nothing dirty about the books and I so don't think it is porn.

[shadowstalker]

I think the books are a good read. Watched the movie last night OR should i say the first part..there is more movies yet to come to finish the story. To me books are always way better than the movies but thats just me..each to their own.

Anything that goes on between two consenting adults is fine. If you look at the whole book story she can walk away anytime she wants but she doesn't.
My belief is that there is nothing dirty about the books and I so don't think it is porn.

Saw the movie yesterday Myself, It was so-so for me. there was nothing in there that stated that she couldn't walk away, she had free will choice from the getgo.

[Natalia]

http://comediva.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/50-Shades-of-Yellow.jpg

[shadowstalker]

http://comediva.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/50-Shades-of-Yellow.jpg

1000 thanks

That was a good one..

[lastlegs]

Just bought the book in Paris Texas at Walmart no less. So this very fundamentalist town sold out the Valentine's day weekend and they is such demand for the books now that Walmart brought them in. They are sealed of course! LOL

Read the first five pages. Based on all the reviews I have read, I expected the writing to be terrible. So far it is nor worse than Nora Roberts. I will write a review of the book compared to the movie after I have read it.

I think it is important that no judgment or review of worthiness be done by someone who has neither seen nor read either.

[Twig]

http://comediva.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/50-Shades-of-Yellow.jpg

1000 thanks

That was a good one..

Too Funny..hahahaha

[lastlegs]

Well, stayed in bed all day and finished 50 shades of grey. LOL an enjoyable day with all the comforts cocooned in bad weather.

One of the things I did before finishing the book was look in on several podcasts of Molyneux. I was not impressed. He seems to be a Ken Burns wantabe with neither the wit nor wisdom to pull it off. I will in the future take a lot of his being quoted with a grain of salt.

I really get why women are into this book and I also get why men do not understand it. If men and women really want to know more about sex and its evolution, they should read the Dawn of Sex which got a lot of talk and publicity about 18 months ago. It is a documented anthropological study. Now had I read that book in my 20s, I would have been a totally different person today. And if 50 shades had been available in my 20s, it would have saved me a lot of research and a lot of trying out frogs who really thought they were princes.

The older I get the more I do not understand why men do not read at least once in a while what is considered women's soft porn which is pretty much every women's wish list of what she would really like her lover to do. I really got into this book (despite the Wows which really set me up to look for the bad writing instead of going with the flow) because that woman is me in my late 20s and early 30s. In fact, I think she is the secret encapsulation of many women's desire for highly physical and imaginative sex. Studies show women desire diversity much more than men to many researcher's surprise.

In my late 20s, I met the love of my life and was totally blown away by him for some of the same reasons this woman explores. One of the things talked about in the book is her best friend's really bad experience with sex as a young woman and her explaining it took almost 2 years for her to be able to climax because of it. In my case, I had been married 7 years before my lover and never had an orgasm. I even asked my obgyn about it and he told me all that stuff in books were simply myths. So when the earth finally moved under my feet, I was a goner. I was also terrified of loving someone and wanting someone that much.

He did not have any planes but he had a big damn boat that scared the hell out of me more than once. And literally putting your life in someone's hands is learning trust. He was a physician so learning to sail a big boat and all the things that go with navigation, radio skills, etc.in the early 70s was still a big deal. So that was a big part of it. His way of dealing with his pain was risking his life. Hang gliding, bungy jumping, digging skiers out of avalanches. And acknowledging that pain in that time was strictly taboo.

What my lover had and what Grey has is control. Real control over their own life which is truly rare, but control over their body and their impulses. This brings and intensity that scare you good. And like Ana, I was willing to risk everything to see how this worked and how far I could go. Because I did not have the information she did, I kept a great deal of this to my self and from him. I am grateful to God we got back together 28 years later so we could both know true intimacy.

This is a love story. There is no way this is pedophilia. She is a highly educated woman who is sexually inexperience and is okay with that because she is so true to herself that she can wait forever to find someone who she really truly wants more than anything in the world. She is so overwhelmed and she always admits that--that there are no words for it--thus, the Wow.

Much of what went on between them is Tantra more than it is sadistic dominance. They do compromise to a point. They are both young and have no real experience sharing and healing each other's wounds although they both recognize and are drawn to it. I could never ever get enough of my lover and those moments of infinite tenderness with terrible intensity showed me the power of love and in its depths the joy of letting go and forgiving everything. Then you have connection. At 65, we finally got to wrapped in our love with the universe and sharing God consciously. OMG OMG OMG lol lol lol A lifetime of preparation for both of us. Deo Gratis.

Tomorrow I will go and buy the other two books and report back. Since there was no dominance or sadism between us, I never recognized the issues of control and how we handled it, until I could look back with understanding. Exactly how Kierkegaard expresses it. Life is lived forward but understood by looking back.

[Elainie]

That's interesting lastlegs. When I was a teen, I had a boyfriend that was into BDSM and so we explored quite a bit of it. We had great sex and I felt it was evenly balanced. Fast forward I married someone who really wasn't sexually experienced and didn't have to interest to be either. I however took it as an opportunity to educate myself in the realm of Taoist arts (Mantak Chia) and later on tantra- all solo. When I divorced my ex, a friend of mine who is a psychologist suggested I might ant to explore dominance. So I did, very mildly with 2 men unlike C. Grey, submissives. But they had all (and more) C. Grey has in real life (both billionaires). It was all pretty mild and fun. There was no sex between us err because I was their domina. From there started my career as a professional domina.

Fast forward a few months later. A friend introduced me to a man who was looking for a lover. I didn't pay too much attention to him when me wet for some reason. Maybe his height was overpowering, at the time I wasn't sure what it was. But he started calling me over the course of several months. He left me seductive messages and I became more interested (at the time I was in a sexual relationship with my teenage years ex). So we had long discussion about sex. He told me up front what he was into (BDSM and a dominant although he could be a switch on occasion). He was intrigued I had all this custom made gear and so on. We didn't discuss safety, emotions, etc; all he told me was that some women couldn't handle his intensity. He told me he loved to worship women and would set aside entire evening dedicated to sessions (otherwise known as scenes in BDSM).

Couple that with his looks and body (he was actually straight out of an Aryan mold but that's another story- he was born in Argentine to former SS parents that had been relocated). In the beginning months, scenes were rather uneventful but became more exciting as we went along. I remember going on a weekend trip to NYC with him and looking up at him while I lay there in bondage thinking, WTF is this man? He really looks like one of those Nordics many abductees meet. My mind was beginning to become distorted because he would *phase* in and *phase* out during our sessions. What I mean by that is light would encompass us or him and I couldn't see straight.

Then we went on vacation a few months later to a beautiful isolated spot in the Caribbean.It was there that things started to get really weird but also wonderful and amazing. We discovered something we called the cosmic orgasm. This happened when we would lie close to each other and a light would enter the space and encompass the space, our bodies would *merge*, we would have full body orgasms that would also project beyond the body and one time we were levitated. These experiences then became more frequent. Obviously we fell in love and then bought a house together (it contained a hidden dungeon too ). At first I was confused as to what might be happening

[Flash]

Hum... ERK, this story is a book in itself. What happened afterward with your lovely Aryan?

Lastlegs, I find your story interesting too. It is amazing how liberating being older is in some ways. No more thinking of building a family, no more thinking of amassing wealth for the old days (if you do not have it by then, tough luck) and the acute sensing that those years are the last to live fully, it makes sex absolutley liberating, which brings in love within it, I think.

I wish I would have known how to get rid of all the false beliefs when I was 20 and know how to chose a Partner as well.

[Flash]

Just finally saw the movie (but did not read the book). I did not find it pedopheliac. For the rest, not that rude either except for the spanking. I must be French!!!!lol

The constant male domination I found tiring, however, some scenes were quite sensually erotic. To be listened too with the boyfriend lolllllllllllllll. He must be French too. Lol

[Natalia]

The film excited me, I was captivated while I watched, and quite a few times I wished that I was her "giggle" :) Just a few things were "too much" for me/upset me (like the last sex scene with the whipping and her reaction to it...)...but on the whole, I found the film and his character, sexy. I am looking forward to part 2 (and I have not read the books either).

But the shaming got to me...I could not express it at the time like I have just done now...Flash, you helped to give me a bit more confidence to do that in your above post.

[lastlegs]

Well, yesterday I went to Walmart to buy the other two books. Friday, they had a whole shelf 3 deep full. Yesterday, they were all gone which I did not expect in a town of 25,000 full of fundamental churches.

We women with the strange love experiences should go back to Amethyst's Sex and Love thread. ERK has inspired me.

[Elainie]

Oops- sorry Flash, I hit the button too soon, there was more I was typing and I see it is lost. Have to retype and it's very long. To make a long story short, those years as a domina and with my ex were filled with fun, and horror. What I saw, what I involved myself in (visits to this place in the Czech R with my main slave/client) arranged rapes (consensual of course with the women who wanted it but these images I look back in in horror) list goes on. BDSM is another world and while there was fun, trips, private jets, yachts, bodyguards, the other side left me internally torn apart.


As the years went on with my Aryan man, his true nature as a sociopath was revealed . Sessions in our home left me confused, hurt, angry- there didn't seem to be a deviation he didn't have a fetish with except children and animals- everything else was fair game. At that time I would peak out if I had a mask on and several times I thought I saw energetic entities. It was about this time that Project Avalon and Camelot came onto the scene and I started doing research into Lucifer. I had local friends that had been part of a metaphysical group for many years and when they met my ex, they confided to me that his energy pattern was very Luciferian.

My ex became more controlling, what I wore, how I exercised, I was cut off from friends and then finally family. He nearly had me under total control and I had in turn become sexually addicted to him. Fast forward to 2009- I broke up with him and he died of prostate cancer last year. Many over the years have asked me to write a book, I haven't because others who were involved are still alive and I value my privacy. It was an interesting time and although filled my great passion, also great pain. My ex kept a detailed journal of our life together and I tried to get it but he gave it to his son- horror of horrors as there are details that could compromise others.


As I said, I haven't read the book, it seems to be much milder compared to my own BDSM life experience and my falling in love with a controlling, dominant sociopath. I wasn't the only victim, other women has the same experience with him, sex like no other, sexual addiction, control, passion, pain, physical and emotional abuse (I didn't delve into that on here as I am still processing how I allowed myself to get into such a situation and forgive myself completely).


Edited to add: in my own case as I look back, I wonder if the energetic space he created (it was unique as we used to get emails and thank you letters from others we or he had invited into the scene) was a result of his background. He was very careful to hide the details of his background when we met and tried to keep it hidden.

[thepainterdoug]

paedaphilia is the most loaded word i can think of regarding peoples response to a word. it almost seems more easily accepted to speak of murdering someone than the prior. yet the very definition of the word has been altered by the times we live. i cannot fathom what went on in ancient times much less the dark ages?? in modern time we have laws and the law says you cannot have sex with her till tomorrow when she turns 18 or 21 or whatever the law is. So today no! tomorrow yes. Seems a funny distinction to draw a line like that but I guess a line needs to be drawn for a legal definition. But this line certainly does not really apply to an individuals unique sexual development.
Joycelyn Elders in the Clinton administration was the only high official who i heard publicly saying, we should get the "P "word out in the open to at least discuss it. She also advocated teaching young people about masturbation in reference to safe sex etc. She was fired shortly after. I think she was brave for saying all.