Losing a good friend

[Baby Steps]

Ahh all of us exploring the path of Spiritual growth will know about this one

There is that special friend, known for 30 years
So many shared trips, thrills & spills
So much cameraderie and knowing

But now divergent. It's strange, we all have friends who we can 'agree to disagree ' with but with this particular one it seems to be an issue.

Probably Ego, but I feel the need to challenge, somehow I must explain, help (or win the argument??) Why does this persons delusions and mind control bother me so much?

I am appraising a particular friendship. The poor person is sad that we seem to always argue. It's not my business to preach, its his life. So maybe it's time to move on.

Or is this an opportunity to address one's own ego stuff?

[pyrangello]

It can be frustrating as hell can't it. All you can do is be the messenger baby steps , if the approach is embraced then it can expand, If the door is shut, it simply is not their time and it is your time and there is no or little chance of compromise. So do what you can , hold together your friendship for which it started , not where it is going and move on your path . I have very close friends of 20 years, nope, notta, not going to happen . So for all the times I spend with them even in 2 weeks , we have the closest bond ever based on what we enjoy the most and my take on things I really don't bring up at all. Its ok , your evolving too !

[giovonni]

The word allowance comes to mind ...

Perhaps your both are unconsciously mirroring/learning from each other ... But note if you really need to win the "argument" ... Then perhaps it is you that needs to learn to adjust in tolerance and allow him to be his genuine self ... After all isn't that what first attracted you to him ?

I suggest just appreciate the friendship and company you've been blessed with and let the love continue to flow ... And consider both yourselves lucky to still have such a bond in this day and age ... :)

[Mike Gorman]

There comes a time when you must balance what you perceive as being an authentic way of being in the world, and what your friends project - it can be a source of great strain and conflict. However, if you value the connection, you must allow this person their own compass, their own path. It is not for us to judge our friends, merely to choose if we continue journeying with them. I have a dear friend of 44 years, we were very close as teenagers and experienced many things. When I sense we are at 'odds' I simply withdraw for a time, inevitably we wind up re-connecting down the road apiece, the richer and more seasoned for it! Just take it easy, don't expect so much from people, look to your own progression and allow others their discoveries in their own time.

[Baby Steps]

thanks , Gio, I think that is it.
Why do I need agreement on certain topics?
I need to do the work on this myself, as the desire to make my friend understand is within me-but why should he?

[Baby Steps]

There comes a time when you must balance what you perceive as being an authentic way of being in the world, and what your friends project - it can be a source of great strain and conflict. However, if you value the connection, you must allow this person their own compass, their own path. It is not for us to judge our friends, merely to choose if we continue journeying with them. I have a dear friend of 44 years, we were very close as teenagers and experienced many things. When I sense we are at 'odds' I simply withdraw for a time, inevitably we wind up re-connecting down the road apiece, the richer and more seasoned for it! Just take it easy, don't expect so much from people, look to your own progression and allow others their discoveries in their own time.

Thanks.Lovely.Why fight against another's chosen path. Love.

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http://projectavalon.net/forum4/showthread.php?860-Enlightenment-and-related-matters.&p=967120&viewfull=1#post967120

Thanks , Wind, for this post , it seems pertinent!

[ginnyk]

Interesting question, Baby Steps. I am really an old timer, having been "awakening" since the early 60's. (Still not there) I have been so sure of so many things so many times and then learned I had outgrown that belief and was on to the next one. I finally realized that when I needed to convince someone to believe this "amazing new concept", I actually was needing them to validate it for me.

It's become a lot easier to do my own validation and sure saves a lot of embarrassment when I change my mind. We hear so many conflicting things and none of it is an absolute. It is so much simpler to flow with it, realize it will probably look different in the future, and save a friendship. It just isn't that important to be right anymore. Probably I am getting lazy in my old age.

Conspiracies come and go, but good friendships are hard to replace.

Love, Gin

[Bubu]

Sometimes we need not read to learn but rather be riminded of what we alrrady knew. In most cases the problem is traceable to ego. Thanks everyone for the wonderful advice.... reminders. We need it to keep ourselves up in this chaotic world where most of what we see is insanity. Ahhhh im going to the brsch today ...have a nice swim. Habe a ice h appy dayeveryone.
You will be fine Baby Steps