Joe Sustaire
19th November 2015, 04:02
Well this is just a little sampler of my wife, Patty's, ability to express her love in the last couple of years of her life. I talked about her some in the Alzheimers thread here on PA, and wanted to share a bit more now that she has moved on.
The title of this thread comes from a song I wrote on a very hard day when I was hurting and feeling sorry for myself about the loss I was feeling from Patty's illness. Which would have been a pretty sad and sorry song in itself until I realized that "You know in truth, some days aren't so bad, when we hold hands, make faces and laugh. Then for a while everything is all right."
As her speech skills deteriorated she used hand holding, kisses, winking, and funny faces to communicate. So we spent many a day acting goofy, holding hands, making faces and laughing.
She was almost always in a good mood. And the most amazing thing was her capacity for love and joy in life. Even in the last couple of years when she had lost so much, the ability to walk, total incontenance, couldn't raise herself out of bed on her own, and couldn't tell you my name or Steve's (our son). She maintained her joy in simple things, blue sky, holding hands, kisses, making faces, etc., and continued to be able to "beam" love right into you.
Much of the time her speech was next to impossible to understand as well, but sometimes she would just speak out clear as a bell. In her "sleepy" times you could tell that she often had good dreams. The smiles would break thru, or she would wake up telling me something, unintelligible and then just break out laughing. Just a couple of weeks ago she was dozing in her recliner, I was holding her hand, and she came to, beamed at me, and very clearly said.... "remember?" I said yes, it was great and she said "yeah", just beaming love and joy at the memory she was having.
So yes, it's been very good indeed! And thankfully Steve was just here for about a month and went to see her everyday and stayed with her until she went to bed at night, having fun and soaking up the love. He took her "off-roading" in her wheelchair, said they came back in trailing mud and grass. He took her shoes and socks off and let her feel the ground and grass with her feet, and she loved it.
I have been very blessed by having Patty's love in my life for such a long time, 44 years all told.
Thanks my friends for all the warm thoughts! You are my family and it means a lot having your support. And as I learned from Patty, love is what it's all about!
The title of this thread comes from a song I wrote on a very hard day when I was hurting and feeling sorry for myself about the loss I was feeling from Patty's illness. Which would have been a pretty sad and sorry song in itself until I realized that "You know in truth, some days aren't so bad, when we hold hands, make faces and laugh. Then for a while everything is all right."
As her speech skills deteriorated she used hand holding, kisses, winking, and funny faces to communicate. So we spent many a day acting goofy, holding hands, making faces and laughing.
She was almost always in a good mood. And the most amazing thing was her capacity for love and joy in life. Even in the last couple of years when she had lost so much, the ability to walk, total incontenance, couldn't raise herself out of bed on her own, and couldn't tell you my name or Steve's (our son). She maintained her joy in simple things, blue sky, holding hands, kisses, making faces, etc., and continued to be able to "beam" love right into you.
Much of the time her speech was next to impossible to understand as well, but sometimes she would just speak out clear as a bell. In her "sleepy" times you could tell that she often had good dreams. The smiles would break thru, or she would wake up telling me something, unintelligible and then just break out laughing. Just a couple of weeks ago she was dozing in her recliner, I was holding her hand, and she came to, beamed at me, and very clearly said.... "remember?" I said yes, it was great and she said "yeah", just beaming love and joy at the memory she was having.
So yes, it's been very good indeed! And thankfully Steve was just here for about a month and went to see her everyday and stayed with her until she went to bed at night, having fun and soaking up the love. He took her "off-roading" in her wheelchair, said they came back in trailing mud and grass. He took her shoes and socks off and let her feel the ground and grass with her feet, and she loved it.
I have been very blessed by having Patty's love in my life for such a long time, 44 years all told.
Thanks my friends for all the warm thoughts! You are my family and it means a lot having your support. And as I learned from Patty, love is what it's all about!