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Thread: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

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    United States Avalon Member Vexx021's Avatar
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    Default 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Where to start? I suppose I should explain myself, so we aren't stumbling in the dark for the first few paragraphs. Since I was a child I knew that my life was different, and sometimes stranger, than that of most around me. I never thought much about it except briefly during puberty as some memories came back to me, and much deeper analysis starting my freshman year at college, though it wasn't until I had started conspiracy research a year after that when I noticed some of the things I researched had parallels to my own past. My plan here today is to lay that life, my life, out for any and all who can offer insight, food for thought, or answers to some of the stranger things that have happened.

    Before starting my timeline of significant events, I should give a short bio on my grandparents and parents. My grandparents on my mothers side were a kind, hard-working couple of conservative values, my grandfather on that side(though not blood-related) was in Vietnam as a radar operator watching for incoming mortar and artillery rounds, his side of the family has many former military members, including a full bird colonel. My grandmother on my mothers side had one child out of wedlock, my mother, and another(my mothers sister) with her husband(the one labeled grandfather from my mother side, above) I never knew my mothers real father, only that he may have been Hispanic. On my fathers side, I never knew my grandfather, but my grandmother on my fathers side traveled the world, going to every continent, save Antarctica, she also taught Olympic Swimming in Russia at one point.

    My father, I never remember meeting; I have seen a picture of him in his 20's or 30's in skiing garb. I know very little about him, though, as he was killed while installing security systems, possibly by a drunk driver. My mother I do have a few memories of, we lived for near a year in California, I was too young to remember, before moving back to her native state of Oklahoma, but around my fifth birthday she committed suicide by shotgun less than 10 feet in front of my eyes, that I do remember, vividly. She was very athletic, and was apparently in the army very briefly, though I know not what she did in the military or how long she was in, just that she was in briefly and then wasn't.

    Now that we have gone over my family, let's start my timeline. I was born June 11th, 1989 a Gemini, a boy of two sides, in the year of the snake. My earliest memory is of being with my mother at Chuck E. Cheese, playing games and getting tickets. I remember right before leaving we were in line to exchange my tickets for a prize and I noticed a little girl next to me crying because she didn't have many tickets, I remember thinking, "You don't have to be sad." So, I walked over and gave her my tickets. She said thank you and gave me a hug, I smiled and my mother and I left. I remember being in the parking lot, in the backseat of a Volkswagen Beetle about to leave, with my mother in the passenger seat and a man in the driver seat both looking back at me smiling. Now, it starts to get strange, be warned that the next memory is quite morbid, and I don't want it to deter you, in this spirit, I have cleaned it up so you don't have to deal with anything gory.

    My second memory is from around the age of 5 and of the night my mother died. I remember running around in an apartment in my underwear while my mother made ramen for me, the memory lapses until later on that night, then I am looking through the open bathroom door at my mother in a nightgown in front of the mirror, tears running down her cheeks as she sobbed, with a shotgun in one hand. Her current boyfriend was there outside the door bawling and pleading about something, though she seemed unresponsive, looking in the mirror, from what I remember. He pushed me away toward the living room, so I couldn't see into the bathroom while he pleaded. Shortly thereafter I heard a loud boom or crack that made me jump, and I saw him slump to the floor sobbing and wailing, "No!" I ran over asking what was wrong, worried, asking what was wrong with mommy. I saw all of the aftermath through the bathroom door, as I ran over to him, but he quickly took my head and cradled it in his chest as he cried. I started crying because he was and didn't know what was going on. The next thing I remember my mothers boyfriend and I are in a lower apartment, some old lady's, I remember being on a water bed and smelling incense as he explained the situation to the old lady and what I assume was the cops were called. After that I remember being on an upper balcony, like with the steps going down to each level and eventually the ground, still dark outside and may red and blue flashing lights, I remember what I assume was a cop lead me down to the passenger seat of his car and asked me to get in, I remember trusting him, so I did so. When he got in he told me to reach under my seat, so I did, there I found a teddy bear. I smiled and hugged the bear as the cop asked me what I wanted to name him, I saw a tag protruding from the bears rear that said Lucky, so I said "Lucky." The next memory I have in sequence may or may not be from the same night, but I am unsure. It is of being the only child in a long room of cots, alternating blue and red ones, the lights were off as I laid on my side awake because I couldn't sleep. To my back on one end of the room I remember two men talking about my future or what to do with me or at least that is the impression I got. There is a large lapse of time where I don't remember where I was or what I was doing.

    Eventually I remember my mothers boyfriend, the one who was there that night, bringing me to his small house(again, with no recollection of my time between the night she died and this memory, just a sense that some long amount of time had passed). There I remember watching E.T.: The Extra Terrestrial for the first time, and remember he had a basement with a copy machine and on more than one occasion we went down there and would smoosh our faces on the glass and make funny looking copies. There is another long lapse in my memory after this, I know not how long I was with him nor how long the lapse was, though again I get the sense it was a long time between this memory and the next.

    My next memory starts in a large office building many stories up, it is daytime, and I am with a man in a suit and tie, and I remember a little of what he said to me, he addressed me with respect and, it felt like, as an adult, he asked if I was sure if this is what I wanted to do, and that if I didn't want to go with them when I saw them, I didn't have to. He led me up elevators and down halls to an open room with 3 or 4 people in it, I instantly recognized three of them as my mothers sister and my grandparents on my mothers side who I had spent time with while my mother was alive. I remember tearing up for some reason while running over to them and they all embraced me. Shortly thereafter I went to live with my grandparents on my mothers side, who eventually adopted me.

    This is the end of part one, as I see it would take too long to list all of the events right now. Food for thought, when I was going through puberty as I took a particularly bad blow to the heart from my first love, many of these memories came back to me as if from the aether. When they did come back I questioned what little I could out of my adopted grandparents turned parents about the night and my mother in general, and a few oddities popped up, but here is the biggest one as it gets more in depth about the aftermath of my mothers death. Apparently my mothers boyfriend, the one who was there that night, had a mother who was either the district attorney or the assistant district attorney. When my grandmother on my mothers side wanted to identify my mothers body, the boyfriend mother did not let her and said she would take care of it all. My grandmother assumes the DA/ADA did this to keep her son's name clean during this process. My grandmother never got to identify her daughter before she was put in the ground.

    Some of the future events in my story will involve psychic/uncanny phenomena, as well as a UFO, and even negative entity attachments that may be ongoing. Any and all constructive feedback that could help me fill in the blanks would be greatly appreciated as well as theories that could help explain the events in totality. Just remember that some of the variables haven't been told yet, if there seems like too little to go on yet.

    Love and light to all readers, be well.
    Last edited by Vexx021; 20th June 2018 at 23:26. Reason: Double spacing paragraphs for ease of viewing

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    may I suggest paragraphs please!!

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    United States Avalon Member Vexx021's Avatar
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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Please excuse me, I've never posted to a forum in my life. I have edited double spacing into it for ease of viewing. Again, my apologies.

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Thanks for sharing your story, or the beginning of it. You definitely had a challenging childhood, and the details in your memories are remarkable.

    As an important side note, I strongly suggest that you edit your opening post and delete your birthdate. The forum is viewed by members and non-members, and your DOB is personal identifying information that you may not want public.

    I look forward to reading your future posts.

    Welcome to Avalon!

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Quote Posted by Noelle (here)
    As an important side note, I strongly suggest that you edit your opening post and delete your birthdate. The forum is viewed by members and non-members, and your DOB is personal identifying information that you may not want public.
    Well ... my initial reaction is different. Quite a few people post their birthdates on the forum, and many more post their astrological sign or birthyear (age).

    Your (Vexx021's) posting of your birthdate fits in well with the style and detail level of your fine post, so I'm not concerned that it's posted. Some 10,000 people are born in the USA each day, so it's not like a birthdate really identifies you much.

    Thanks for joining Avalon!
    My quite dormant website: pauljackson.us

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Welcome to Avalon, Vexx021!

    Thanks for sharing! You will find that many here have had, shall we say, "interesting" lives! It is good to look back over all that has happened in one's life & try to figure things out. I know I found my own "answers" here & feel assured you will too!

    There are many here, who, because of their own life's experiences can give insight & wisdom to the unraveling of what your life has been & what you can make it to be!

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Vexx021, I am a firm believer that we heal ourselves by writing and getting things out in the open. I had tears in my eyes as I read your story. Life here is hard, but there is a higher purpose.

    Thank you for having the guts to share and the heart that wants to heal. And the curiosity to dig for the truth. It's the only way we can come out from under the huge pile of garbage we humans have created by lies and secrecy.

    You are four years younger than my son would have been, had he chosen to stay here. I applaud your bravery.
    "The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what we share with someone when we are uncool." From the movie "Almost Famous""l "Let yourself stand cool and composed before a million universes." Walt Whitman

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Hi vex, if you have seen and been in close proximity to a ufo, and given the traumatic nature of your early childhood, and that you have had psychic experiences, as well as perhaps haunted by negative entities, all this may indicate that you are the subject of abductions. I dont want to alarm you in this matter. Many of us have suffered this fate. We somehow live fairly 'normal' lives but have the occassional bizarre episode that we recall (the abductors blank out our memories as best they can).

    I have heard it said that the more psychic you are, the more interested the aliens are in you.

    These entities, which seem to be able to slip in and out of our 3d timeline at will, seem to be harvesting us in some way. I have scars from repeated puncturing of my skin and have even awoken once to see it in process when their extraction got too painful.

    Even though tptb like to keep the population scared, to control the public, the aliens have not chosen to terrify me. Most abductees have no memories of being terrorized, but most likely have suffered quite traumatic treatment by their abductors. The aliens seem to want us docile and obedient to some authority. They must be getting what they want and dont mind us having comfortable lives otherwise. Mind you, this could all be a setup for transhumanism, but thats another story.

    Some have suggested past life regressions and suppressed memory recall, coupled with heavy doses of foregiveness, can help heal these wounds.

    Sorry to hear about the loss of your parents, vexx. For some reason i expect your continued story will have a similar dramatic nature. Thanks for sharing.

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    United States Avalon Member Vexx021's Avatar
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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    It is odd you should mention scars appearing with seemingly no cause, because I have a few of those. I have one in particular that is on the back of my neck nearing the shoulder-line, in line with my spine. One nightmare that I will cover later, was the scariest I have ever had, after I awoke from it I was frozen in bed for a minute or so before I could move. As for past life regressions and suppressed memory recall, I haven't done much research into the subject, but if it were in any way able to help me find answers about myself, I would try it. I know not where to start, who to go to, and probably don't have the funds to afford such an endeavor. It does interest me, now that you mention it though, thank you for your perspective-shaped puzzle piece. Love and Light.

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Scars....there are some people who do seem to carry scars from past life experiences; more pieces to the puzzle. No one has all the answers & we are all seeking to learn the "truth".

    I understand about not having the money; problem is....there are too many charlatans abroad who want to take advantage of our naivety. Ask your "higher self" to reveal to you what you need to know.

    Rest in the fact that you are an Eternal, Sovereign Being in charge of your own destiny. You chose to come here & are accomplishing what that purpose is, whether you "understand" or not! Speaking as an Old Lady who only "woke up" about 3 years ago, I know what I'm talking about!

    Be at rest within yourself....you are now in a place where others can relate to your questions & want to help, if possible.

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    Default Re: 'A Strange Life': In Need Of An Outside Review For Fresh Perspective; Part One: Childhood Until Adoption

    Good morning Vexx021! That is a tragic and sad bit of life story. I understand you wish to know the truth but maybe those memory gaps are there for a reason. That said, I will help if I can. One thing I took from your story is that you could read at 5. I guess you don’t remember a pre school or kindergarten at that time? Your babysitter? Who taught you to read pre -K ? I find that interesting enough to start there.

    ¤=[Post Update]=¤

    Oh! I see this is an old post and Vexx has vamoosed!

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