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Thread: Butt Tumors

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Butt Tumors

    You heard it here first. Watch out for them. I predict a plague of butt tumors in the next 5-10 years followed by waves of heavy litigation.

    Show me the under 30 female who doesn't carry her cell phone in her back pocket. They all do.

    It's going to get disastrous. Within the next decade we'll have a significant population of people walking around with half an ass, post butt tumor surgery. I predict colliquial phrases like "don't half ass it" will be canceled and anyone who's uttered them on social media within the last 10 years will lose their jobs and friends and any chance at resuming what was once a normal life. Added to the lengthy lgbqt etc will be an additional "g" representing the gluteusally challenged. Parking lot spaces will be reserved for such people and airplanes will be forced to install adjustable cushions so as to avoid lawsuits and the "ableist" label.

    Ok I'm not sure about all that but I'm serious about the butt tumor threat. You can't have a wifi device next to your skin, all day, day after day, without some sort of consequence. I really think young women in particular are in danger. And I think lawsuits will follow. After all, it's the American way.
    Last edited by Mike; 8th August 2021 at 23:29.

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    United States Avalon Member wondering's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Mike, don't guys carry their phones in their back pocket, too? Maybe it would be worse if they carried them in the front? 😱 Sounds like a good point though.

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Well that doesn't sound quite like me Mike... do I not fit the perspective ??!!!!

    And I'll thank you to know my "Butt" isn't quite that big... lol...

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Quote Posted by wondering (here)
    Mike, don't guys carry their phones in their back pocket, too? Maybe it would be worse if they carried them in the front? 😱 Sounds like a good point though.

    Good question. I'm not sure where most men carry them because I can't see them. One would assume a front pocket, which is dangerously close to the male organs but not immediately on top of them at least LOL. There is some separation there, and I would guess less danger as a result. Personally I don't carry my cell phone with me very often at all.

    The phone in the back pocket thing is a cultural mainstay now. You can't help but notice it, even if you're not going out of your way to ogle the bums of young women. They're just there. It's ubiquitous. It's this big blocky thing protruding from back pockets everywhere. Can't miss it. I was being just a little silly in my OP but I really think this might be a problem in the not too distant future

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    You need to get out more lovely!!!

    Quote Posted by Mike (here)
    Quote Posted by wondering (here)
    Mike, don't guys carry their phones in their back pocket, too? Maybe it would be worse if they carried them in the front? 😱 Sounds like a good point though.

    Good question. I'm not sure where most men carry them because I can't see them. One would assume a front pocket, which is dangerously close to the male organs but not immediately on top of them at least LOL. There is some separation there, and I would guess less danger as a result. Personally I don't carry my cell phone with me very often at all.

    The phone in the back pocket thing is a cultural mainstay now. You can't help but notice it, even if you're not going out of your way to ogle the bums of young women. They're just there. It's ubiquitous. It's this big blocky thing protruding from back pockets everywhere. Can't miss it. I was being just a little silly in my OP but I really think this might be a problem in the not too distant future

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Quote Posted by EarthGirl (here)
    Well that doesn't sound quite like me Mike... do I not fit the perspective ??!!!!

    And I'll thank you to know my "Butt" isn't quite that big... lol...


    I'm sorry. You might get a "bum" tumor if you take up the habit, being from the UK and all.

    Is that not a fashionable thing over there for under 30's? The cell phone in the back pocket? Just curious

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Again your asking the wrong person as I don't own one... never will and can't be arssed ? lol...

    Quote Posted by Mike (here)
    Quote Posted by EarthGirl (here)
    Well that doesn't sound quite like me Mike... do I not fit the perspective ??!!!!

    And I'll thank you to know my "Butt" isn't quite that big... lol...


    I'm sorry. You might get a "bum" tumor if you take up the habit, being from the UK and all.

    Is that not a fashionable thing over there for under 30's? The cell phone in the back pocket? Just curious

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    Avalon Member Orph's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Seriously, the first thought that popped into my mind when I saw thread title "Butt Tumors" was Joe Biden. ---- As in Joe Biden is the Butt Tumor of Washington DC.
    I am enlightened, ............ Oh wait. That's just the police shining their spotlights on me.

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    Canada Avalon Member Ernie Nemeth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    I heard a 1cm gap is recommended between device and body. But of course we get no health directives from authorities about such trivial matters. It can only be a best guess, depends on who you're listening to. I better switch cheeks...
    Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless — like water...Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend. Bruce Lee

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    So you're saying that in the future there will be lots of butthurt people? Maybe there should be a campaign about it, save the butts!
    "When you've seen beyond yourself, then you may find, peace of mind is waiting there." ~ George Harrison

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Quote Posted by Wind (here)
    So you're saying that in the future there will be lots of butthurt people? Maybe there should be a campaign about it, save the butts!

    Yes, Save The Butts!

    And laugh at your own peril! It will only mean you're a hateful, anti-butt bigot! And as for the rest, they're no better. In all likelihood they harbor deep, unconscious, anti-butt bias and desperately require Critical Butt Theory to rid themselves of this evil.

    In all seriousness, I can see this becoming what breast cancer is now. Possibly a day or week or month to "raise awareness"? NFL players all wearing pink cleats for the cause? Endless commercials and heart warming testimonials about women who were forced to have their butts removed but are still living full, noble, purposeful lives by educating others on the perils of cell phones in the back pocket. I can see it all happening lol! I know it sounds like a Vonnegut novel but our collective reality has pretty much become a Vonnegut novel.

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Hmmm, I don't know Mike.
    I don't own a cell phone and I think it's a bad idea to have one anywhere near one's person, and other than that I have nothing to add to this thread.
    But I just came from your "I am the True Satan" thread where your last post (and your were threatening that it would be your very last post there) was about farting in the phone to get your too talkative friends to shut up, and now you are focused on young women's butts.
    There seems to be a trend here, but I'm not sure that it's progress....
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    United States Avalon Member Strat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    I don't want to get too far into this but there is a running joke between my friends and I about how this is my theme song:

    My friends would tell you a comma should separate the 'ass' and 'man' when referring to me because they're jerks.

    Mike is absolutely right regarding the carrying in the back pocket and this is because girls (at least around here) wear absurdly tight pants and it's more convenient for them to put the cell in the back pocket. I gotta disagree on the tumor thing though. Maybe a skin disorder at the most but noticeable tumor I doubt. There's a joke I want to make regarding cysts and a common way to alleviate them but I will refrain from making that joke. That being said, what the **** do I know? When I saw the title I thought this thread was going to be regarding butt implants.

    Not to get off topic but I don't doubt the dangers of 5G or whatever, hell, any 'G'. There's a cell tower on my walking route and it has warning signs on it to stay out because it could cause health issues. Something like that, I'll snap a photo of the sign. Also there are soldiers who wear packs to block cell signals to prevent IED's from going off and the radiation from those packs causes them to have awful side effects. I tried looking this up and I can't find where I originally saw it, if someone could find it I would appreciate it.
    Last edited by Strat; 9th August 2021 at 03:29.

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Quote Posted by onawah (here)
    Hmmm, I don't know Mike.
    I don't own a cell phone and I think it's a bad idea to have one anywhere near one's person, and other than that I have nothing to add to this thread.
    But I just came from your "I am the True Satan" thread where your last post (and your were threatening that it would be your very last post there) was about farting in the phone to get your too talkative friends to shut up, and now you are focused on young women's butts.
    There seems to be a trend here, but I'm not sure that it's progress....

    No connection. Sheer coincidence. I assure you. My farting into the phone has nothing to do with cell phones in young women's back pockets, and cell phones in young women's back pockets have nothing to do with this hypothetical focus I apparently have on young women's butts (which I am neither confirming nor denying, mind you). Anyway, your dot connecting has failed you Obi wan.

    As Strat points out, it's nearly impossible not to notice a woman in absurdly tight pants, and even harder not to notice the mini brick she will often have in her back pocket. It's like wrapping ones lower half in cellophane while inserting a bowling ball and daring people not to notice. So this has very little to do with my perviness, thank you very much
    Last edited by Mike; 9th August 2021 at 05:04.

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    I don't think I've seen anyone with a phone in their back pocket, gal or guy. I don't doubt that some may do this, I've simply not noticed it in particular (in the UK). For me personally, I will put my phone in the interior pocket of my jacket - a thick leather jacket - on the right hand side. Left side is my wallet and keys.

    The back pocket is the least secure place to stow a valuable item. I don't keep a single thing in the back pocket, and never have. They're not functional pockets at all, and are only for cosmetics - at least that's how I treat them.

    Then again, maybe in a hot climate (where you are Mike) where thick leather jackets aren't a sensible option and pockets are at a premium, a back pocket is the only comfortable place to keep it.

    Here, most women and girls I see carry their phones in one hand, almost like it's an extension of that hand. Or maybe in their purse. Men...I've no idea. I don't take much notice of other guys walking around and what they're doing/wearing.

    If they're like me, and I assume most of them are, their phones will be tucked safely in an interior pocket somewhere.
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Gotta say, I knew it was Mike when I saw the title of the thread.
    I would've protested if someone else had started it, knowing that it was Mike who gave them the idea, and the author was refusing to give him his props.

    Consistency of insight, humor and engaging the crew to speak up.

    Who knows, except the scientists who have to know it, the dangers that is. It's their job. I have pics from mri's from Erickson and Nokia somewhere in an old HD, taken in the 90's, of the damage cell phone radiation does to the brain. Nothing new to them.
    The mri's show the penetration of the cell signal going deeply into adolescent brains, quite in comparison to the much less pronounced affect upon the adult brain.

    Carrying a cell phone affects the body on a cellular level, and that level is the destruction of the ability of the cell to transfer energy. There is a stronger energetic signal overriding basic electrochemistry. Pretty simple.

    I got quite a shock from a student government meeting 10 yrs. ago, as they were discussing whether or not to let a cell tower go up on campus very near the main buildings there. I first talked about the effect of cell phone radiation upon sperm count and how it drastically lowered the motility and production of the very same little swimmers. Got a laugh until I went deeper into the effect on the rest of the body.

    The student council then agreed to not have the cell phone company rep come by and give his little spiel, which would have been the only requisite for the company giving the school $35,000 a year for the use of the space. You'd think I'd be happy about my ability to get a point across. F NO.

    I protested and argued that the council needed to hear both the rep and me go at it. I'd give them copies of the many studies I had, and Bozo could pull out his balls and start juggling. Of course I'd have more than a few comments about his balls and how they were shrinking before our eyes, but most of all I was there to challenge the students and their NEED to question all of it, none the least would be to read, challenge or agree with studies on the matter.

    Listening only to the science and not the insanity did not produce a healthy outcome for many of the future encounters those students were to have with the dystopia we now live in.

    It's the entire body that's affected by the signal strength. That's why some of us rarely carry a cell phone on our bodies. The phone does put out more energy trying to constantly engage a tower, unless it is turned off and no one else has the tech to turn it on. I have often left mine in the truck overnight, forgetting I even had one.

    Barrie Trower, who I used to confuse with the super-guitarist Robin Trower, the man who has worked with microwave weaponry since 1959, has said that anyone who puts up a 5g tower should be tried for murder.

    That tells us a lot about it all, bulging cell phones invisibly destroying tight butts aside....though that is, to me at least, a very worthy and noble cause to awaken humanity to. Seriously....do you know how inspiring such things are to humanity?
    Where are the meme's for this very pressing issue.....

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    No smartphone. This saved my butt.

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    United States Avalon Member Mike's Avatar
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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Hey Hym that's interesting stuff there.

    It's a topic near and dear to me because I'm so affected by it. Not wifi, per se, but operating a wifi device, consistently and over time really cripples me. So I know firsthand the type of damage this stuff can do. I have this mitochondrial issue, so I'm susceptible I spose. I used to think i was some sort of freak, but handling wifi devices apparently affects people with mito disease in quite a profound way, according to the research.

    Time will tell if Trower is correct. I think he will be!

    P.s. indeed, where are the memes? Wind and OpenmindedDude have offered some pretty good puns though lol
    Last edited by Mike; 9th August 2021 at 21:27.

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    I never use wifi. I use an ethernet cable connected to my computer, and the router is in another room. I have measured the powerful, onsite wifi stations used on remote film sites and they are not only annoying, they measure way off the charts on every tri-meter I've used.

    In Korea and I think Japan ?, pregnant women are told to not use wifi in their homes and to avoid them if the wifi stations/routers are used at their work. Then they are advised to wear a fine metal mesh infused, cloth covered smock that is basically a faraday cage as protection from the harmful effects of wifi radiation. Not a peep here in the states about that at all.

    I've known for decades, since the mid-90's, about the science behind the dangers I've always felt, and that before I carried a cell phone in my truck, for my work. Even now I have a tri-meter that shows me it would be best to limit the use of this old macbook pro and use one of my iMacs, one of my 21.5" or 27" models, with a corded keyboard and mouse. I do think that the wifi of the wireless keyboard and the wireless trackpad are low on the EMF scale, so I'll try them too.

    The most prominent high measurement I get is in the EMF, electro-magnetic frequency reading. For me I count on my perception and the sensitivity I get by going without, and then turning something on to see if I sense any difference. Then I use the trimeter to see if my sensitivity is increased or decreased.

    My son gave me one of his strong M-Audio speakers to listen to a more robust, louder and distinct sound on this computer, but it feels too strong when it's on. I'm going to hook up an extension to the speaker to see if the feeling is that much different. It too measures as "High" on my tri-meter. It's healthier for me to tune my hearing into the more subtle frequencies, instead of amping up the sound.

    I could tell you early experiences with the original wifi dishes/antennas frying doves....oops...I mean pigeons, landing on them, perched on the overpasses on the Santa Monica Freeway, then they added a cage over it which only let them fry longer before falling off, then finally those plastic spikes were added to keep them off for good.

    Or the cell tower repeaters placed on the telephone pole behind the yoga studio/store, Yoga West, on Robertson in L.A. and the woman who lived directly next door, upstairs in line with the units close nearby, immediately after the cell tower being activated lived only 3 months, her whole body developing cancer everywhere, then she died. That's not a very developed yogi who can't sense the energy, but it fits...fake ass yoga for people frying their asses in the classes.

    Of connected and completely NOT REALLY yogic ignorance of the builders of the store and yoga center it should be noted that the main yoga room had 7 doors and no windows in it.....in fung shway that equates to a complete lack of balance....doors rep parents and windows rep childhood openness....it fits if you knew the d.bags that created it.
    I added 4 large skylights to the sloped, asphalt shingled, front roof system many years ago to put some light into it, but no going with my suggestion to at least add some to the roof over the main studio.

    Or the cell tower perched on the sides of the water tower at the Northern New Mexico College's El Rito campus, directly in line with the administration building. In that building almost everyone there got cancer of one type or another. The head maintenance man with a work area on the bottom floor got prostate cancer and died. Our counselor got ovarian cancer. The head of the renewable energy and earthbuilding dept. got cancer on his nose that had to be operated on. I'd bet that everyone who ever worked in that building, since the cell tower and it's many large units were installed, had a compromised health status.

    When I was teaching a class there I noticed the tower and immediately switched the class to the earthbuilding and spanish colonial furniture building, which is far, far away on the other side of the campus. If an administrator, like the college's president who has an office in the building, is ignorant of the cancer clusters for anyone within close proximity to the cell tower, they are ignorant, yet also likely liable for the injuries and possibly the death(s) that have occurred there. You can't unlearn the facts of the damage cell towers pose once you read, see or hear them.
    Last edited by Hym; 14th August 2021 at 14:12.

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    Default Re: Butt Tumors

    Quote Posted by Mike (here)
    Is that not a fashionable thing over there for under 30's? The cell phone in the back pocket? Just curious
    As far as my observations go, yes it is a fashionable thing here in the UK. I know personally one woman in her 30s who keep her phone in the front of her bra, of all places!

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