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15th September 2021 10:57
Link to Post #1
Avalon Member
Finding Courage within yourself.
I always thought of courage as something that you either had or didn't have. I have had some moments in my life where I exhibited courage and many more where I did not follow my convictions but "just went along to get along". There was a time I would have labeled that as being nice or cooperative. In some instances that was true and in many instances it was cowardice or cognitive dissonance.
I can honestly say that never once in my life has someone sat down and talked to me about how I might be able to use courageousness in my life. The closest thing I ever got was a comment from my dad. "Pam, why don't you stand up for yourself". No further discussion that was it.
So, synchronicity offered me this video and I have watched it twice. What I have come to realize and really it is quite a revelation to me is that I can learn to become courageous. There is a process and there are methods.
Courage is strongly discouraged in our culture. Think about that. Being honorable and being courageous are not conducive to to the inversion we are living in. Being fearful, weak and relying on authorities, even if they are clearly inept, liars and insane is encouraged and mandated.
I am going to throw this video out as a first for those who want to contemplate learning the skill and I welcome those that have mastered courage on a fairly consistent basis to share.
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15th September 2021 12:04
Link to Post #2
Avalon Member
Re: Finding Courage within yourself.
As the video points out it is how we deal with our thoughts that determine what and where our lives will lead us. Mal adaptive thinking are thoughts and emotions that seem to prevent us from taking action. Generally those thoughts are fear based at some level and are not easily managed.
Being empathic and feeling emotions very strongly and having no idea how to deal with them led me to coming up with coping mechanisms at an early age. Eating disorders and addiction worked quite well for some time. They are all consuming distractions. I didn't see any other choice. As the video points out. Maladaptive, fear based thoughts don't respond well to reasoning and can only be suppressed if you can and are willing to pay the price. Even if you stay willing to pay, sometimes it just quits working. In my case there were/still are "I shoulds". I should be beyond fearing this, I should be beyond hating that ect. So reasoning my way out of the thoughts just didn't work.
I came upon the Sedona Method. It helped me greatly. It provided a technique to experience and choose to release thought and trauma that weren't serving me any more. I would use the technique to make myself functional. I released just enough to go to work, take care of my kids ect.
You might be wondering where I am going with this. The basis of courage is being able to navigate malaptive thinking and take action that is in line with our values anyway.
I love the fact that a suggestion in the video is a simple one that reflects the Lester Levenson, Sedona method technique although they are slightly different. When having a maladaptive thought one simply labels it and experiences it. The act of labeling it, reduces it's charge. There are so many times I have taken action on these malaptive thoughts and did not have a good outcome. In fact, it is a vicious cycle like chasing your own tail. The easier, softer way would have been to experience the thought/emotion and label it. "I am feeling angry" and move on.
How does this lead to building courage? Challenging those maladaptive thoughts when they go against what you really want to do. Taking tiny steps to challenge ourselves. It seems becoming courageous is like building muscle mass. It takes practice.
I am aware that there are those that probably don't need this in the least. In some ways I am lucky to have been so messed up. It forces a degree of teachablility I doubt I would have otherwise.
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The Following 19 Users Say Thank You to Pam For This Post:
Ankle Biter (15th September 2021), Bill Ryan (15th September 2021), Ewan (15th September 2021), Franny (15th September 2021), haroldsails (16th September 2021), Ioneo (15th September 2021), Mike (17th September 2021), O Donna (15th September 2021), Peace in Oz (16th September 2021), pueblo (16th September 2021), RunningDeer (17th September 2021), selinam (15th September 2021), tendril (17th September 2021), Tigger (15th September 2021), toppy (16th September 2021), Tyy1907 (15th September 2021), Victoria (15th September 2021), Wind (15th September 2021), wondering (15th September 2021)
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15th September 2021 12:32
Link to Post #3