A Thread for the Overthinker, I think

[O Donna]

A thread discussion for the over-thinker and those that think they're not.

Here are some over-thinking ideas to get you started

Does overthinking only affect the over-thinker?
Does over-thinking only impact the over-thinker and/ or society negatively or is there positive benefits too?
Is the point when thinking becomes overthinking subjective or objectively determined?
If over-thinking is a step in the wrong direction in life, why go there?
Does over-think share similarities with addictive substances?
What self-checks do you use to flag yourself that you might be over-think it.

It can also be a thread to go when any of us catch ourselves over-thinking. If that is the case I'll be here a lot! A member can reference the thread in another thread/ post when over-thinking is suspected. Maybe a self-referencing is in order.

Overthinking comes with it's own build-in irony so feel free to use it when expressing what over-thinking means to you.

Multi-media can help drive an observation home and is acceptable within the PA guidelines of that nature.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=igpLpHpBzvA

This thread has been started on a late night of thinking. As I read that last sentence it sounded in my head as a late night of DRINKING. Btw, no wine was harmed in that making of the post.

When irony lands, it comes right up without delay in a comedic slap to the face or wait and sneak up later to do to it.

[Orph]

As a mere toddler I was able to program my brain in such a fashion so as to keep me from overthinking. It came in real handy when I was a child going through school. And it has served me equally well as an adult. As soon as my brain activity reaches a certain level, it trips a deactivation switch which shuts off my brain and I fall asleep.

So I will give your thread as little thought as possible.

[Kryztian]

I am a musician, and one has to think on different levels, both while preparing and while performing, for good results. Someone hands you a sheet of music to play and if you are good, you spend some time analyzing it and ask your self about mood and tempo, where it builds dramatically and what the technical difficulties are and how to adjust your performance of the piece around them? If you don't do some intellectual work before, you find yourself breathing in the wrong place, not having any more volume to give to get to the dramatic climax or playing a piece faster than your fingers can possibly glide over the keyboard. On the other hand, you can overthink the piece and work out every single detail in your mind, but when you perform it, the piece won't work as you planned in detail, and you get disappointed and frustrated.

I also direct choirs and they often ask good questions about the music, in preparation for singing it. But sometimes, someone will "over think" the music and ask too many detailed technical questions. Of course, I am happy to show off my technical expertise and discuss these intricate details with them, but will notice other choir members becoming confused, so often, I refuse to answer and say "just sing it. You will know what to do when the time comes." They aren't always happy about this, but after enough times, they are forced to use their gut instead of their intellect and that usually pulls them through.

So, intellectual thought needs balance with instinctual, sub-lingual "thinking". Thinking needs balance with doing. At least in my never very humble opinion. And only you can be the arbiter of what level of balance that is.

[petra]

I'm an overthinker. There was a time I was under a lot of stress though, and that caused me not to be able to think at all. At the time I thought I had turned "permanently stupid". The stress subsided eventually, and I can think again now. After that, I consider being able to think AT ALL is a wonderful gift, a blessing if you will - even if the thoughts get annoying sometimes.

Overthinking is like... a part of me. When I start to think about my own thoughts, I wonder am I overthinking? Wondering if you're overthinking has definitely got to be overthinking right? Going in circles is a pretty sure sign that you're overthinking too ha ha

[O Donna]

Posted by petra (here)
Going in circles is a pretty sure sign that you're overthinking too ha ha

That does give the impression of over-thinking doesn't it.

A benefit of over-thinking is when I come out the other side. I'm like, what was that? And then the question invites me back in and I'm like, maybe later. lol

Irony, humor helps me break the cycle until it's time for another tumble.

[Wind]

I like to think things through.

Then I think them through again.

I'd probably be mad these days if it wasn't for meditation!

[O Donna]

For an over thinker, thinking is overthinking without the moniker.

[petra]

Posted by Wind (here)
I'd probably be mad these days if it wasn't for meditation!

It worked for you, Wind, but boy - when I tried to meditate it was a disaster! It was just creepy, and so I wonder if maybe I was just trying to meditate when I was in a bad place physically. It's worth another try, because definitely verging on the edge of crazy some times!

Posted by O Donna (here)
What self-checks do you use to flag yourself that you might be over-think it.

That's a really difficult question other than going in circles..

My train of thought often goes like this:

1. Have I thought of every possible scenario, including the worst one?
2. If yes, I'm done.
3. If no, consider more scenarios.

It's kind of exhausting. I wonder if being female has any bit to do with it.

[ceetee9]

Posted by O Donna (here)
A thread discussion for the over-thinker and those that think they're not.

Here are some over-thinking ideas to get you started

Does overthinking only affect the over-thinker?
Does over-thinking only impact the over-thinker and/ or society negatively or is there positive benefits too?
Is the point when thinking becomes overthinking subjective or objectively determined?
If over-thinking is a step in the wrong direction in life, why go there?
Does over-think share similarities with addictive substances?
What self-checks do you use to flag yourself that you might be over-think it.

Oh Donna (pun intended)! You make my head spin. I mean, I guess I believe that over-thinking does impact the over-thinker and society, hopefully in a positive way, but possibly also in a negative way, I think. But then I could be wrong. Or am I partially right, but unsure of which part(s) is/are right and which is/are wrong? Perhaps there's really no right or wrong answer or any way to know, but, then again, if there isn't a right or wrong answer then what is the purpose of existence? Perhaps to render us completely mad! I mean, if there is never a right or wrong answer to anything then wouldn't we be living in some sort of insane event generator created by some sick and twisted alien civilization or creator? But is this an objective or subjective hypothesis of existentialism? How could I know if I'm not sure if I'm an individual or just another cog in the collective consciousness wheel of fortune—or perhaps I'm neither or both?

However, I could be going in the wrong direction. If so, why did I choose to go there? It doesn't make any sense. Therefore, I must be going in the right direction; unless, of course, I am stark raving mad. But then again, this could be some sort of addiction. Yes, maybe I'm addicted to mind-f#$king every thought and idea to absurdity. Ooo... that makes my sticker peck up! That's it! But how can I check myself when I'm not convinced that that is the problem and when I love it so much? Yet, if it is the case that I'm addicted then is there an antidote for this curse? If not, is there no way to shutdown the non-stop merry-go-round in my head?

Confusion will be my epitaph...

[O Donna]

Posted by ceetee9 (here)

Oh Donna (pun intended)! You make my head spin. I mean, I guess I believe that over-thinking does impact the over-thinker and society, hopefully in a positive way, but possibly also in a negative way, I think. But then I could be wrong. Or am I partially right, but unsure of which part(s) is/are right and which is/are wrong? Perhaps there's really no right or wrong answer or any way to know, but, then again, if there isn't a right or wrong answer then what is the purpose of existence? Perhaps to render us completely mad! I mean, if there is never a right or wrong answer to anything then wouldn't we be living in some sort of insane event generator created by some sick and twisted alien civilization or creator? But is this an objective or subjective hypothesis of existentialism? How could I know if I'm not sure if I'm an individual or just another cog in the collective consciousness wheel of fortune—or perhaps I'm neither or both?

However, I could be going in the wrong direction. If so, why did I choose to go there? It doesn't make any sense. Therefore, I must be going in the right direction; unless, of course, I am stark raving mad. But then again, this could be some sort of addiction. Yes, maybe I'm addicted to mind-f#$king every thought and idea to absurdity. Ooo... that makes my sticker peck up! That's it! But how can I check myself when I'm not convinced that that is the problem and when I love it so much? Yet, if it is the case that I'm addicted then is there an antidote for this curse? If not, is there no way to shutdown the non-stop merry-go-round in my head?

Confusion will be my epitaph...

That made me genuinely smile both inwardly and outwardly, thank you for that! You get my beautiful dilemma.

I just search for the words 'beautiful dilemma' since I've never use them together before that I can recall.

This video stood out to me in the results. Check it out, it's pretty dang cool.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=vj4xiXn6lxM

[Bill Ryan]

Lovely thread!

I'm an active mountaineer, as many may know (I still am, very much so), and a while back I used to be quite a serious rock climber. And that really is a kind of moving, be-there-focused-in-the-moment meditation.

One little anecdote. My climbing partner, named Paul, was holding my safety rope one time while I led a short, steep part of the climb we were on. There were no available anchors for him (he was just standing there on a small ledge above a sheer drop), so it was up to me to place anchors for myself as I climbed. (This is all rather complicated, but read on: you'll get the idea.)

As I climbed on, way above him, all my own anchors fell out, one by one. If I'd fallen, I'd have pulled Paul with me right off the cliff. But blissfully, I no idea my anchors were all failing.

Here's the moral of the story. Paul didn't tell me what was happening... or else I'd have started thinking (a lot!! ) about the mortal danger we were both in. I happily continued to the top, empowered by the confidence we were both safeguarded. Only after he'd climbed up to join me did he tell me that we'd both have died if I'd fallen.

I told him he'd done EXACTLY the right thing.

[ceetee9]

Posted by O Donna (here)
This video stood out to me in the results. Check it out, it's pretty dang cool.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=vj4xiXn6lxM

Very thought provoking. As is her choice of the word "consensus" for the project. On the one hand, one could say none of the participants were in consensus (agreement) in their interpretations, like the blind men each holding a piece of the elephant. Yet, on the other hand, perhaps they were in consensus (harmony/unity) when the parts (their interpretations) were brought together to form a whole new tapestry. No right nor wrong answer, just a beautiful new creation that is greater than the sum of its parts.

Thank you O Donna.

[petra]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
Here's the moral of the story. Paul didn't tell me what was happening... or else I'd have started thinking (a lot!! ) about the mortal danger we were both in.

I told him he'd done EXACTLY the right thing.

Good moral! I've learned there's types of people who freeze up in those situations, and surely that has to be a result of over thinking. I think I used to be one of those people, but something changed. I can't say what for sure, but I think it might be about what we call "intuition".

When you're running on nothing but intuition... choices become really easy to make.

Posted by O Donna (here)

Posted by ceetee9 (here)

Confusion will be my epitaph...

That made me genuinely smile both inwardly and outwardly, thank you for that! You get my beautiful dilemma.

Me too, I even pictured it. "R.I.P. Here lies Confusion"

It's that "happy sad" feeling again, dang you guys!

[petra]

Well here I go again, apparently! Going in circles again looking at this article called "Where is Women's Intuition?"

I'm of the same opinion of this article in that men have just as much intuition as women do.

This article gets particularly interesting towards the end, and seems to do with motivation more than anything. When the women are motivated they "try harder", same applies to the men

As Klein and Hodges concluded at the end of the article reporting their research, men as a group aren't poor "everyday mind readers"; they are simply unmotivated ones. If you want men to show you how well they can compete with women in "reading" other people's minds, just pay them for it!

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by petra (here)

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
Here's the moral of the story. Paul didn't tell me what was happening... or else I'd have started thinking (a lot!! ) about the mortal danger we were both in.

I told him he'd done EXACTLY the right thing.

Good moral! I've learned there's types of people who freeze up in those situations, and surely that has to be a result of over thinking.

Yes. Sportsmen and -women call it being in the zone. That's when something higher takes over, as it were, and one stops thinking — and worrying! — with one's conscious mind.

The Inner Game coaches this. It started out focusing on Tennis, but then mapped itself to Golf, Skiing, and then Music, Work and even Stress.

I did an Inner Skiing course once. The idea is that if you think too much when you're skiing, you're really likely to goof up. (If you're afraid of falling, then you definitely will: etc, etc.)

It was a whole bunch of crazy fun. Each morning we'd just play games. Like, the coach would ask us to ski like an animal — and make the requisite noises. (Imagine skiing like a pig, or a snake, or a hippo. ) Or, TRY to fall over, as spectacularly as possible. And each afternoon, we'd have free time and would just go skiing regularly on our own.

Nothing much happened, except that I had a really good time. And then, something remarkable occurred.

On the final day, I did a perfect run down the mountain. I mean, it was perfect. I could have been a Winter Olympic Champion.

And it totally felt as if it was nothing to do with me. My experience was just watching myself, almost like sitting on my own shoulders, observing and marveling at the experience. It was unforgettable to this day. I never quite repeated that, but I definitely got the message, and took it away with me.

I don't know a thing about the "Inner Game of Stress", but I imagine that it might connect with that nice joke (which I believe was made seriously to demonstrate an important point) that the best thing to do with worry is to carefully write down everything you worry about, each time it hits you.

And then, you diarise a time each week — like for 30 minutes at 9.00 am every Monday — to do nothing but worry as hard as possible about everything on your list. After that, you've got all your worrying done for the week, and can get on and be productive.

Try it...!

[Flash]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)

Posted by petra (here)

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
Here's the moral of the story. Paul didn't tell me what was happening... or else I'd have started thinking (a lot!! ) about the mortal danger we were both in.

I told him he'd done EXACTLY the right thing.

Good moral! I've learned there's types of people who freeze up in those situations, and surely that has to be a result of over thinking.

Yes. Sportsmen and -women call it being in the zone. That's when something higher takes over, as it were, and one stops thinking — and worrying! — with one's conscious mind.

The Inner Game coaches this. It started out focusing on Tennis, but then mapped itself to Golf, Skiing, and then Music, Work and even Stress.

I did an Inner Skiing course once. The idea is that if you think too much when you're skiing, you're really likely to goof up. (If you're afraid of falling, then you definitely will: etc, etc.)

It was a whole bunch of crazy fun. Each morning we'd just play games. Like, the coach would ask us to ski like an animal — and make the requisite noises. (Imagine skiing like a pig, or a snake, or a hippo. ) Or, TRY to fall over, as spectacularly as possible. And each afternoon, we'd have free time and would just go skiing regularly on our own.

Nothing much happened, except that I had a really good time. And then, something remarkable occurred.

On the final day, I did a perfect run down the mountain. I mean, it was perfect. I could have been a Winter Olympic Champion.

And it totally felt as if it was nothing to do with me. My experience was just watching myself, almost like sitting on my own shoulders, observing and marveling at the experience. It was unforgettable to this day. I never quite repeated that, but I definitely got the message, and took it away with me.

I don't know a thing about the "Inner Game of Stress", but I imagine that it might connect with that nice joke (which I believe was made seriously to demonstrate an important point) that the best thing to do with worry is to carefully write down everything you worry about, each time it hits you.

And then, you diarise a time each week — like for 30 minutes at 9.00 am every Monday — to do nothing but worry as hard as possible about everything on your list. After that, you've got all your worrying done for the week, and can get on and be productive.

Try it...!

That is neat idea and doing!

I did something similar last summer after being very hurt emotionally - I told myself "no way I will carry it for months of years". So I dive into it, nothing else than the pain, truly looking crazy I think. Screaming, banging, feeling the deep pain - so deep that it seemed unrelated to the hurt itself. It went on for 5 hours about, with a witness. And then it was gone. I still had minimal remnants, nothing more.

My 30 minutes at 9:00 every monday morning was in fact a one time 5 hours. And finished, life went on as full of energy as usual.

[Flash]

Posted by ceetee9 (here)

Posted by O Donna (here)
This video stood out to me in the results. Check it out, it's pretty dang cool.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=vj4xiXn6lxM

Very thought provoking. As is her choice of the word "consensus" for the project. On the one hand, one could say none of the participants were in consensus (agreement) in their interpretations, like the blind men each holding a piece of the elephant. Yet, on the other hand, perhaps they were in consensus (harmony/unity) when the parts (their interpretations) were brought together to form a whole new tapestry. No right nor wrong answer, just a beautiful new creation that is greater than the sum of its parts.

Thank you O Donna.

A very special thanks to Donna, for bringning us this video. That woman touches me to the deepest of my heart.

You see, we have here on the forum a young member who started here at 16 and is now 21 years old. Sally Taylor and Mini Flash have many things in common: they dress alike, the hair are floating around the same way, they are both musicians (Mini Flash compose, write songs and sings), and they both have problems with the written language.

However, Mini Flash had more work to do, since she was born with partial aphasia (damage in the language centers of the brain) and fine and gross motor skills impairments. She could not read, write or speak easily and had motor coordination problems. She received a dire prognostic at 5 years of age of not going to be able to finish primary school despite being intelligent.

So, she took her young but great courage, and her incredible wish to communicate and succeed, and started thousand of hours of therapy, training, re-engineering of the nervous system. In her young life, she surely worked more already than most of us will do in our life time. She acquired discipline, will and steadiness to work her disabilities through. And she developed a very large heart, filled with empathy for others.

And like Sally Taylor who went to have a degree in University, Mini Flash is now 2/3 through college, looking for and finding internship in a foreign country (Switzerland) because her boyfriend is there.

Lately she went to help very young autistic children who could not speak. She was helping them to speak. She said "it was so difficult, because i knew precisely what they were feeling like, and I could see in their faces their despair at not being able to communicate". Then she said that she felt so bad at seeing the specialists not understanding how to approach those children and how to make the lessons understandable to them - she sometimes told them what to do, because she knew from the inside.

These, Sally Taylor and Mini Flash and more of them show incredible courage, talent and persistence often more than most on this planet. I bow very low to them, their attitude and their achievements. They have my greatest respect and love.

And..... when Sally Taylor talked of her mother, I was quite touched - mothers are a pre-requisite and crucial for success for these children.

I am Mini Flash's mother. And sooooo proud of her.

Thank you again Donna, I am sending this video to Mini Flash, it will give her strenght and support. And she will recognize herself.... in Sally Taylor.

[petra]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
And then, you diarise a time each week — like for 30 minutes at 9.00 am every Monday — to do nothing but worry as hard as possible about everything on your list. After that, you've got all your worrying done for the week, and can get on and be productive.

Try it...!

I'm doing this already and there's just not enough books in the world!!! Ha ha I'm exaggerating I know, every little bit helps I know that.

"The Inner Game" sounds interesting, I'm willing to bet I'd learn something from that, thanks Bill! Not a sports fan, but music, work and stress are always around.

Those words "That's when something higher takes over, as it were..." makes me think of the opposite - "almost dying"! I've heard people say that they felt like "time slowed down" in cases like either of this, but we know that's not possible so maybe it's just the mind's way of giving us a bit more "time" to think. There was only one time it felt like time slowed down for me, and I recall what I was thinking exactly. I wiped out on my bike, and as I slid across the gravel (for what seemed like eternity) I was thinking.... "This tingles" Should have been wearing a helmet, and now I only have half an eyebrow - but still alive!

Adrenaline really is an amazing force too, I've heard some miracles being attributed to increased adrenaline. I think it's possible it could have something to do with the time slowing down feeling as well.

[Bill Ryan]

Also highly, HIGHLY recommended, for anyone who's never read this: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, by Robert Pirsig.

Two threads:

• PDF book: "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" by Robert Pirsig
• Robert Pirsig, author of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, has passed

An extraordinary, almost uncategorizable book, effectively a true-story, partial autobiography of a man with the mind of a genius — who thought too much.

What he DID think about was brilliant by any conceivable standards (and all his many deep insights are laid out in the book in a way that's compulsively page-turning and compellingly easy to read and understand)... but what totally confounded him was his inability to get along with his son.

[sunwings]

This is a quick presentation about the Inner game of tennis, really quite useful.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=G-YJePnMrGY