Targeted Individuals: experiences, problems and solutions

[Smell the Roses]

Posted by Chris (here)
I don't want to hijack this thread, so I'll just make a short announcement. I am looking for a volunteer targeted individual who would be willing to undergo a bit of psychic experimentation. The entities I am channelling (Inanna and the Anunnaki) claim to have the technology and the spiritual power to help people who are undergoing this extreme form of psychological, psychic and electromagnetic torture. They made an announcement about it in the below post:

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...=1#post1232570

Is anyone here desperate enough that they would be willing to give it a shot? I'm really not comfortable getting involved in this and I have zero expertise in the matter personally, but I thought this would be a great opportunity to put these entities to the test. If somebody already goes through daily torture as a result of being a TI, I don't see how trying this can make it any worse.

Just as a note, Inanna has already helped a few people on this forum with various problems and I have no doubt personally that she is highly benevolent and capable. However, if you do volunteer for this, you do so at your own risk, I cannot guarantee anything.

---Removed line requesting volunteers for a research proposal not yet approved by forum moderators---

Yes, it could make it worse.

[arwen]

A very interesting interview, purportedly with a former insider. He sounds very credible. Of note is that he identifies highly intelligent people, PhDs and academics who do not follow the script, and of course, anyone with an independent mind as primary candidates for the "Program". He speaks from his personal experience of the openly conducted project in Seattle. There are also some excellent links and comments below the video.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=RSwTJMdaivI

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by arwen (here)
A very interesting interview, purportedly with a former insider. He sounds very credible. Of note is that he identifies highly intelligent people, PhDs and academics who do not follow the script, and of course, anyone with an independent mind as primary candidates for the "Program". He speaks from his personal experience of the openly conducted project in Seattle. There are also some excellent links and comments below the video.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=RSwTJMdaivI

I want to endorse arwen's post here: this man is totally credible, and his testimony is WELL worth listening to very carefully. For all TIs reading this, listen to this maybe several times. And, make good notes.

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
I want to endorse arwen's post here: this man is totally credible, and his testimony is WELL worth listening to very carefully. For all TIs reading this, listen to this maybe several times. And, make good notes.

Thank you, arwen. Here's the first 15 minutes & a few extra transcribed snippets:

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone. I'm sure you can imagine how difficult of a decision this was for me to decide to speak out publicly and the support I've received has confirmed to me that I did make the right decision in of course it was very much needed given the severity of the problem that’s sweeping the country right now in terms of gang stalking and voice to scull. So I just wanted to take the time to say that. Yeah I am working at SIS. Actually I have friends and family members who are military and military intelligence and through them I had always heard you know job opportunities.

I thought about joining the Marines when I was younger when I was 18. I'm 39 now so over the years it was something I had always thought about and of course after 9/11, so many jobs were created in the defense industries homeland security. And what a lot of people don't know about is within private security domestically when it within the United States it's a booming industry. It’s one of the fastest growing sectors of our economy as generally, our society is being militarized and generally that militarization is being privatized and as a result where you have is many many corporations in the United States of American private companies that are getting a lot of money from investors under the table to begin to set up what I describe as a security apparatus around and within the United States of America.

And it is in that context that I heard of the opportunity to work for security industry specialists in Seattle, Washington, They’re a private security company that is headquartered in Culver City, California and through a friend I heard that SIS was hiring. I heard they were hiring for security specialists. And given my backgrounds in education which is actually anthropology and sociology. Most people don't see how those two connect but by studying human being you can really do well within the intelligence industry and within the security industry because it is all about learning how to deal with and talk to and communicate with and ultimately from our perspective secure human beings.

And so it was through friends and family that I learned about the opportunity. And I started off like everybody else as a low-level security guard, minimum wage, I worked my way up through the company over time and eventually was assigned to executive protection and threat assessment risk management.

And just to tell you a little bit about that when my official duties were was to secure personnel data and property of VIPs that our company is hired to protect. So there's a whole lot of training that goes into that and I became a security specialist for SIS specializing in executive protection also risk and threat assessment to our clients. Our clients are the companies or the individuals that we contract out with and provide services for.

And it was in that context that I became aware of what I described as a social engineering program and a research and development program that was being carried out by SIS and our clients in Seattle, the Amazon Corporation. And it was through moving up within the SIS hierarchy and working with more and more people.

As I was assigned to more and more assignments, I became aware of the existence of this program. and then little by little over time I became aware of the extent of it and it wasn’t long before I realized how horribly out of control it was. How downright evil it was once I began to realize that SIS was experimenting on its own employees my fellow security specialists, I was outraged. I later learned that my company was involved in a larger social engineering program that encompassed the entire city of Seattle.

That aspect of the program was experimenting on the homeless population of Seattle, Washington rural housing DES, Downtown Emergency Services Center facilities. And I later learned that they were indeed experimenting with, when I say experimenting, voice to scull, hive mind behavior modification technology, that is frequency based and directed at a targeted individual to basically control their entire person. And it was by moving up even more that I realize that this experimentation was going on against the general population of Seattle. And then just the average man and woman on the street, upper class, upper upper class and even the flat-out rich, were having this technology used on them without their knowledge.

As more and more implement information and details of the program became were made known to me, I became more and more outraged by it. And I spent a long time because I had many friends within the security company a lot of these people are great people. They’re very good people not everybody involved in SIS is directly involved in experimenting on people. They’re not all directly involved in gang stalking. I never was. I never partook in that but I did partake in training that deals with tactics and protocols that are used normally for surveillance and counter surveillance. But within that is the all of the information and the know-how that you need to be able to gain stock. And that is in fact, what they are doing.

And so over time I became outraged. I tried to play my cards right. Wait for the right moment and when I really just couldn't tolerate it anymore when I found out just how out of control it was I decided to object to my superiors in person. But within SIS specifically what happens is they are experimenting on their own employees.

So it's a long story. I'll try to get through it quick. But basically people are selected from all over the country. We’re talking other cities all over America they are selected for many different reasons. Often it is because they are isolate, they don’t have a lot of money, friends or family and they also tend to be people that are highly, highly intelligent. The aspects of this technology that they're interested in improving upon have to do with cognitive processes. Processing information and as a result, they want highly intelligent people to be targets of this program.

They also tend to target people who are into what I would call alternative research commonly called maybe conspiracy theories. People that disagree with the government. People there into researching things like 9/11. Also they are interested in people that are interested in technology. I have found a high percentage of targeted individuals to be people who either are interested in or have information on highly advanced technologies. Usually having to do with directed-energy weapons and frequency weapons. The exact kind of weapons that we're talking about here that are used in voice to scull and behavior modification. The works there's many other aspects to the technology but once these people are selected, they will have the entire gang stalking/voice - skull program run against them.

This is detailed in my article. But they will be organized. To start they will have career sabotage programs run against them to ruin their job. They will have character assassinations camp campaigns run against them in there neighborhood. They’ll be isolated from family and friends as those individuals are turned against them and they will be isolated slowly and slowly over time using the technology itself. As many of the people freak out understandably when they first don't know what it is. Oftentimes they end up going to psychiatrists and false diagnosis of schizophrenia, manic depression, delusion, delusional paranoid are rendered against this individual.

And it turns out that that's a loophole in the law that they are using to take away people’s constitutional rights. As once you are deemed mentally unfit to care for yourself, ie your depressed, delusional paranoid etc. They use that. The state or the federal government uses that as an excuse to come in and say that they have to care for you. So I would warn all targeted individuals out there please do not go to psychiatrist and allow them to render a diagnosis against you. Because that is a dirty trick they are using to take away the rights of people all over the country.

That’s a great question. I do not have direct knowledge of that personally in terms of an individual how they are selected. What I can speak to intelligently though is that each individual fits the general profile that I'm describing. They’re highly intelligent. They are able to be isolated by whatever means. They normally have some sort of a what I would, what I would describe as a free mind. They’re people that aren’t, you know, part of the crowd so to speak in a way that they think. You know, they're outsiders. They’re what the government would call dissidents or revolutionaries or people that may be a problem.

Some TI's have have said that this kind of profile that alt-TIs fits is empowered individuals and I would definitely agree with that but I cannot speak to how they actually identify an individual person. I think the general profile that I'm describing that fits the targets of this program is something that is generated high up within the program. We’re talking at the federal government level. We’re talking at the highest levels of this social engineering program or scientists from all over the country, and all over the world, they’re looking at someone’s genetics. They’re looking at someone's cognitive abilities. They’re looking at someone's genes. They’re looking at someone's DNA. They’re looking at people's social situation. They’re looking at people's career.

I've been very surprised that so many PhDs are actually targets of this program and are usually PhDs that have gone to great against the grain in terms of what academia normally teaches usually within the fields of science and technology and the reason for this is because people running the program want to cover up certain technologies in certain aspects of science that can lead through to tremendous, tremendous breakthroughs. These highest levels of science and technology are the sole purview of classified sectors of our government and military. And as a result, it is not the opinion is that the American people do not have the right to this information. And is in the national security interest of our country to keep it classified.

And so that is the answer to your question. What I will do those take this opportunity to distinguish really quickly between the larger phenomenon of TIs that is usually a person in America that's being targeted by the technology and as being gang stalked by members of their community and a specific program that I am whistleblowing on. Those specific program I am whistleblowing on involves the actual abduction of TIs from around America. They’re put on a Greyhound bus and they are shipped to Seattle where there are made homeless. They live in one of the homeless shelters where they are housed and experimented on with voices scull technology. And then they become and are funneled into SIS to work as low-level security guards. Where they are experimented on even more so that is a specific program.

And that's what I detail in my blog in my website. But because I am familiar with that program it utilizes the same tactics of gang stalking and the use of this technology against individuals of my knowledge on that program applies to what all TIs are going through the exact same technology and the exact same gang stalking tactics that are used against them.

In terms of numbers I know that there are right now at least three to four hundred individuals in downtown Seattle that have been abducted from all over the United States brought to downtown Seattle and are being housed in DESC downtown emergency services center homeless shelters, and being experimented on 24/7. The numbers of SIS employees that have been experimented on to my knowledge is in the dozens that's all I have direct knowledge of though about 24 to 36.

And then nationwide, the estimates in terms of targeted individuals who still maintain some manner of autonomy and freedom and have not been brought to Seattle or enslaved completely by this the estimates I have heard is anywhere from one to two million at the moment. And we're talking full-blown TI's that get the technology and are being Gangstalked 24/7. Those are the estimates that I'm familiar with the this is discussed very much in the open within SIS and with some of the liaison contacts that I had with the ESC Amazon and then also members of the military that are in a civilian capacity.

One thing you have to understand is that within the security business most of the people working there are ex-military and X intelligence operatives. And many of them in fact are still active intelligence operatives. And have simply been reassigned to domestic duty to work with a private security company specifically for the purposes of carrying out this highly illegal program that's being run against TI all over America.

***

15:37 “…done very covertly to the point where the person it's being used against will not know that this technology is being used against them and … this technology could potentially being be being used against tens to hundreds of millions of Americans every day…”

16:00 “…there are field effects where they will not direct this technology at an individual but create a general field of frequency in a geographical area so that everybody that within that geographical area is feeling the effects of the technology. It’s more of a general application of the technology instead of an individual specific application of the technology. But when you consider that use of it and the fact that it is used for emotion and thought and behavior modification that we could potentially be working at many many millions of people across the country they're under the influence of the technology today right now.”

“…within this general field they can broadcast a frequency that affects human beings within that frequency field and can induce a general mood of let's say happiness or sadness, anger, agitation peacefulness. And in this way they can have an overall effect in the city. I have seen this done. It is remarkable how effective it is because you will walk down the street of Seattle and literally see people all in a bad mood all at the same time and they do not know each other. And then you go over a block or two to a different office building and you walk in and the exact same things going on there.”

18:00 “…it can be used to induce riots for example or stop riots. It could be very very dangerous and it's a great point you bring up about traffic patterns and auto accidents. I mean this is messing with the inner most part of human beings their emotions…”

[Valerie Villars]

I watched this video and commented on it on another thread just yesterday. It is really, really excellent.

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Valerie Villars (here)
I watched this video and commented on it on another thread just yesterday. It is really, really excellent.

Adding your comment here, Valerie.

Posted by Valerie Villars (here)
That is a really good video. I clicked on the you tube link because I often find some very astute comments from people who bring up specific things not referenced in the original video.

What is astonishing to me is the sheer number of sane sounding people who have experienced different versions of this dark, dark mind game. I hesitate to use the word game because it is a really serious and very true phenomenon.

I love music and will always love it, but there was one comment by the actual poster of the video, in his explanation, in which he states that many don't realize how many musicians are involved in this. Why I find this credible is because there was an inordinate amount of musicians involved in my own experience. The whistle blower in the video outlines the tatooed, tough guy appearance of many of the stalkers. I had many, many of these types involved in my own experience.

And there was a poster who stated that many targets have deep historical roots in this country, which my family has.

It was certainly very thought provoking and I still wonder at the nature of this very real phenomenon. It's a real head scratcher.

[Valerie Villars]

@arwen. This has been bugging me since I read the poster of the videos comments about musicians, in regards to the above video. I tried to do a search to find his videos and possibly get more information about his knowledge of musicians being involved.

Do you know who this guy is? I believe he is called builder rejected. Do you know anything about other material he put out? Any info you are aware of, other than the above excellent video?

I'm really interested in that aspect of the targeting, since I can relate.

[Bo Atkinson]

Thanks for the independently personal testimonials which give the best chance of overwhelming the “dark forces” (or whatever name and history are attributed). I liked the “Silent Holocaust”* video and have signed or clicked various testimonials, which has always been the only evidence, given discernment. Or the next best to one’s own experiences, which might in some way corroborate. Dr Robert Duncan’s technological whistle blowing has also explained “how it actually works electronically, which a technical attitude appreciates hearing.

Fast forward…A little past the 58 minute mark* a questioner asks if a target’s DNA sample provides special access to disrupt a targets health, (somewhat equivalent to voodoo weapon-ization)… I cannot prove this, as these things are inherently law resistant as of today, but my wife and i strongly suspect attacks on our health. A good thing to share here is that we both do manage to endure these recent styles of attacking.

The post about living impeccability is part of the key, IMHO, despite that some people feel drug induced consciousness protects them. Plants can work both for the good and/or for the bad, unpredictably. The subconscious is little understood by authoritarians, who fund such science. While the cause and effect cycles are ignored, where the perpetrators receive the boomerang effects… Back to the point of testimonial of survivors demonstrating their endurance, providing evidence that we spread evidence without fear. And the insiders who will also react from lowered consciousness with insider-inter-retaliation… Once the higher tech is spread more broadly:

The worst electronic capabilities might be tested through 5G, due to the surround-effect, of triangulating targets, live, at vastly larger scales, (the internet of things). Except that testimonials of experiencers of beta stages may provide preview support, to new targets. It took me years to find my 2007 particulars, explained as attacks, also thanks to my earlier study of many types of basic technologies… Fast forward, also according to Duncan the research on advanced control, (mind hijacking), was done using satellite and weather radars to piggyback mind control transceiver-connections, or attack mode telepathy, of full body highjacking, which i actually experienced along with dream highjacking, separately…. be prepared. 5G might enable this on huge populations while also leaking it to hackers of tomorrow… Humanity is one, where the evil mind/souls paint themselves into corners, where they cannot escape the ultimate effects. Testimonials are a mass awakening which we TIs can advance, for the good of all. We have so much good which can be pushed forward for humanity, especially when we are under greater attacks, which help motivate our greater responses. Thanks all.

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by Valerie Villars (here)
@arwen. This has been bugging me since I read the poster of the videos comments about musicians, in regards to the above video. I tried to do a search to find his videos and possibly get more information about his knowledge of musicians being involved.

Do you know who this guy is? I believe he is called builder rejected. Do you know anything about other material he put out? Any info you are aware of, other than the above excellent video?

I'm really interested in that aspect of the targeting, since I can relate.

I'd be interested to know more, too. This interview was edited from an original, and the insider states he does podcasts and has a website.

I listened to the whole thing, and I confess after a while I found it a little frustrating: there was quite a lot of repetition (though sometimes he was clearly responding to edited-out questions), and there were quite a few things I'd have liked him to enlarge on:

• What frequencies are used?
• What's the effective range?
• Is the technology developed sufficiently to be deployed by satellite? (If not, is this planned?)
• What defensive/protective strategies are known that might work? Can the frequencies be jammed, reflected or insulated?
• Can he comment on Robert Duncan's or John Hall's work?
• Is this being deployed in other countries?
• Are politicians being targeted? Gunmen in shooting incidents? Corporate leaders? (If so, what examples does he know of?) Is a civil war planned to be instigated by stimulating opposing factions?
• What's the highest level of executive responsibility for this? What components of the US military-intel apparatus know about and are directing (overseeing) the SIS program? How high does the chain of command go?

[Noelle]

The same person speaking in this 2017 video? He says his name is "Justin Carter."

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=_08w2nyQe0s

[RunningDeer]

No doubt programs are going on but for me the objective of this article came across as fear porn. I stopped after he stated 70-75 percent of targeted individuals are women. It was unclear if that percentage included children. (passage below) Yet, from the earlier characteristics he listed most if not all fit into the target population. In the end, there were enough contradictions and repetition that made me question the true intention of the article.

68:07 - “…Yeah, yeah well first thank you for your kind words and I do want to say that I have heard SMS up up to 70-75 percent of targeted individuals are in fact women and it absolutely breaks my heart because I can't understand the mentality of men or women as well that would actually prey on and torture and abuse a woman, a single woman it's just horrible. These people have children and you’re absolutely right I mean they're tearing families apart. They’re doing it to children as well. “

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Noelle (here)
The same person speaking in this 2017 video? He says his name is "Justin Carter."

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=_08w2nyQe0s

Thanks, Noelle.

Bryan Kofron: Testimony of Ex-Security Industry (SIS) Whistleblower Re: “Silent Holocaust” and Derrick Robinson Interview
[article]

ETK Introduction: In this youtube, ex-private security industry employee Bryan Kofron (aka Justin Carter) blows the whistle on the nation-wide organized gang stalking program. (“The Program,” however, is certainly global). Kofron, a former “perp” himself, aptly explains the psychology of the perpetrator community. He also notes, based on his experience, that the citizens of Seattle, Washington, Aurora, Colorado (which has an unusually large percentage of military and intelligence personnel) and numerous other cities, particularly cities near Air Force and Navy military bases, are targeted en mass.

ETK Note: The videos I originally loaded onto this post have been taken down, as have all of Bryan’s youtube videos on his gangstalkerwars.com website. Bryan Kofron is a whistle-blower and former employee of Security Industries Systems, Inc. (SIS), who was doing contract with Amazon.com to torture homeless people in Seattle, among other atrocities. His presentations are extremely informative and he is apparently very sincere, credible, and compassionate. Thus, he was acclaimed, accepted, and even financially supported by the “TI community” until he recently “discredited” himself by making some strange youtubes in which he interviewed himself, adopting strange accents for other personnas. The TI community now believes that the “evidence” that Bryan Kofron presented in his serious videos cannot be used in court proceedings. This is the position that Deserie Foley of PACTS expressed to me in a recent phone conversation.

[RunningDeer]

From Bryan Kofron (aka Justin Carter) gangstalkerwars.com:

Gangstalker Wars Podcast

******************UPDATE******************

Due to threats made against me and my loved ones, I am discontinuing gangstalkerwars.com. The fake activist organization “PACTS International” is involved in a slow-kill domestic assassination program. They bragged to me that they have killed Targeted Individuals before and they said that I would also be killed if I didn’t stop my efforts to expose the Truth about what is being done to T.I.’s. I am NOT affiliated in any way with PACTS International and I never was. If you are a Targeted Individual and/or a whistleblower, stay away from PACTS International and DO NOT trust them or get involved with them in any way. They are liars, they are very dangerous, and they are loyal to the same people who are targeting all of us. They continue to downplay and cover up the use of frequency and etheric weapons against Targeted Individuals in accordance with the will of the people running this program against T.I.’s. The online T.I. community consists largely of fake activists and fake T.I.’s who are complicit in the psychological operation being run against T.I.’s. If you are a T.I., stay away from these controlled opposition groups and understand that T.I.’s are being used against other T.I.’s to perpetuate the negative effects of the psy-op being run against us. Thank you to everyone who has supported me and my efforts to expose the crimes being committed against T.I.’s and what is going on in Seattle, Washington. Stay Strong and never give up. – Bryan Kofron

[Bill Ryan]

Okay. Maybe see also this thread:

• Bryan Kofron - THE INSIDER WHISTLE-BLOWER you've ALL BEEN WAITING FOR

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
Okay. Maybe see also this thread:

• Bryan Kofron - THE INSIDER WHISTLE-BLOWER you've ALL BEEN WAITING FOR

Ugh! I knew it sounded familiar....

......................

[RunningDeer]

I wasn’t able to find the video where Alfred Lambremont Webre guested Leuren Moret. It was about four years ago. She spoke of gang stalking and the technology in and around the University of California, Berkley Campus. She lives in the vicinity. (IIRC)

A few examples Leuren Moret gave were: 1) she has a collection of tea pots and tea cups and there are cracks in all of them and some are broken. 2) she and her neighbors’ teeth are cracked and falling out.

[Bo Atkinson]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)

....

• What frequencies are used?
• What's the effective range?
• Is the technology developed sufficiently to be deployed by satellite? (If not, is this planned?)
• What defensive/protective strategies are known that might work? Can the frequencies be jammed, reflected or insulated?
  
  

Duncan described much of the tech in books like:
https://archive.org/stream/TheMatrix...hered_djvu.txt
And. PROJECT: SOUL CATCHER TWO

I should add that i wrote some word equivalents and other interpretations concerning 5G, rather than attempt direct quotes.

Basically the beta testing used very long range weather radars, HAARP, mobile units and satellites, in trios, in order to triangulate individual targets, (but masking true intents with fake reasons and scrambling all the data in real time. Duncan says he is market testing at least one limited application device, but otherwise mentions ideas to try... All very lengthy to summarize...

I see some TIs discussing methods they like, yet note that high end programs like SATAN thrust the greatest threat to all, if more transceivers can focus (triangulate) specific targets and big computers massively process programing with non-consensual-telepathy. I think that ultimately, humanity can outgrow this only with larger expansion of consciousness.

Let the reader decide after studying tons of tech, plus hearing science savy whistle blowers. I think raw evidence is in voices of Tis as a whole, considered for common principles, rather than personal content. Let the experiencer describe what happens to them. See what helps TIs survive and resist, based on intuition, the subconscious, their higher selves, spirituality, or what ever works for them.

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by RunningDeer (here)

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
Okay. Maybe see also this thread:

• Bryan Kofron - THE INSIDER WHISTLE-BLOWER you've ALL BEEN WAITING FOR

Ugh! I knew it sounded familiar....

......................

Omni also created this thread about him:

• Electronic Harassment & Organized Stalking Program Insider

[arwen]

Posted by Valerie Villars (here)
@arwen. This has been bugging me since I read the poster of the videos comments about musicians, in regards to the above video. I tried to do a search to find his videos and possibly get more information about his knowledge of musicians being involved.

Do you know who this guy is? I believe he is called builder rejected. Do you know anything about other material he put out? Any info you are aware of, other than the above excellent video?

I'm really interested in that aspect of the targeting, since I can relate.

Hi Valerie,

I did not know who he is/was, but I believe your questions have been answered by others above. I am not online much, just sporadically. The content of what he stated in that video, plus many other factors made him seem credible, but as with all genuine whistleblowers, it does not take long for the message to get distorted. For me the data in that interview passed several of my tests for credibility, but I apologise, do not have the time to detail what I found valid with specifics. I did find the main value to be his testimony from the "other side", as the area is flooded with genuine TIs who are falling apart and thus not credible, and of course the usual plethora of disinfo agents to make the whole thing seem ludicrous.

With regard to his statement that there is a high percentage of women (and children) targeted, my view is that is actually true, but again, not at liberty to elaborate at this stage. There is plenty of data online about the targeting of women by rape, spiritually, and other ways (look at the rape agenda of women in Europe) and that is in my view because there is a kind of global "cremation of care" ritual taking place. I did not perceive his anguish over that as fear porn, but as normal and natural human outrage at the picking on of the life-givers and the future (children), but again, that was just my perception.

I did check if the video had been posted before on the forum but it did not show up in the search. Now I know his name (thanks to those who surfaced that data), will research further into what occurred there.

[Valerie Villars]

Of all the things on this forum, I understood all of the above on a visceral level. I have to digest and come back and re-read. Thank you all so much for your responses.