I don't care to learn anything anymore.

[thepainterdoug]

 
Something has changed in me.  It's hard for me to put this into words but I hope the message resonates, and 1000 things could be added here.
 
Can you keep piling up lies upon lies and remain sane ??  

I have been an active member at PA for about 10 years and I do not post anything much anymore.   There was a time not too long ago when I had a thirst for knowledge, a continual searching for truth.  

The truth I believed was needed and was necessary . And getting consensus with other awake and open minded truth seeking people was crucial . It was a way to check if you were over the  target or completely delusional.  
Somehow now this has changed. 

I remember seeing Lee Harvey Oswald shot live on tv in 1963 and all the history to follow. As I grew older, I realized I was very gullible, believing what my eyes and ears perceived as reality. I believe I am still gullible, mainly because I tell the truth, and just think everyone else does as well.  
 
Today I find myself living in a new tower of Babel. Nothing makes sense, all talking past each other, all scurrying around with our point of view, learning very little from others for we are simply no longer trusting of each other or believing in anything.  
Reminds me of lifting a rock in the woods and seeing hundreds of insects now exposed, scurrying for cover and survival.  

As it stands right now, I have lost faith in ALL governments and institutions.  This includes NASA, all the Intel abc agencies,all  Politics, the CDC, the WHO, so called climate science, medical doctors and Hospitals  the UN, all social services, all financial institutions and certainly front and center, all MSMedia.  
They were supposed to be the watchdogs and deliver the true story for us. 

If an actual alt media org tells the truth, then they are marginalized and slandered. It seems to be an air tight system.  
Things come and go and we just can't retain or remember.  I must receive 200 "Breaking"  news messages a day on my iPhone, quickly to be forgotten

I studied so many things from mechanics, piano tuning and rebuilding , learned to paint, compose music, play ice hockey etc. I now feel I'm shutting down. All today seems to be a played out over exposed formula and Im tired.  

A.I.  is figuring it out and offering people a quick answer.  Even in music, a strong bass drum beat and thumping  bass can be programmed by a non musician. Just add a commercially edgy foul mouthed singer and degrading lyrics and finis.  
It's the Ikea of creativity, and good enough for most.

 Who needs more of this ?Who needs more noise ? There is a shortage of silence. I dont want to see art everywhere, on every building at every moment  including tattoos on every inch of flesh.Yet this is what I do. I make things, both art and music and i make it for sharing with others and not for existing in a vacuum .

For me, the world needs to re-calibrate.   

We were always able to count on a few things.  Numbers added up and were constant and infallible.  There were two sexes , a man and a woman with some aberrations such as nature does with the brown polar bear . Nature always throws out a variation on a main theme for survival insurance. But these are exceptions.

In mechanics, a nut works with a bolt as a pair.  Two bolts are pretty much worthless . Two nut fasteners as well. But you can build a world with nuts and bolts.  You can construct a world around you ,yet we are being made to feel that two bolts, two nuts are where it's at and the new truth.  What will happen to our children?

As corruption spreads exponentially and the crazed need for money that follows rules us all, we are sure to destroy ourselves. Maybe not in an immediate dying, but in an internal soulless vacancy bereft of any moral or loving value.   
Add to this the obsession of fame and the body and we are backed into a corner. And it's happening. We are in it. 
Money makes the mare go. Funding for honest climate science and medicine is cut if you dont march in step with the one world agenda. And the advertising sells the masses, and that is what they care about, not us marginal few. 

And what can be said about all the recent unanswered questions.  The children of the Hawaii FIRES. Nord Stream 2 destruction.All things Hunter Biden, All things Epstein, his suicide, client list, flight logs, Durham? Pedo gate?  All things Hillary, bleached hard drives, smashed cell phone, yellowcake to russia, steele dossier,  and 1000 other things swept under the corrupt carpet. 
We're  supposed to forget all this right?

In wrapping this up, I have been studying NDE,s for about 3-4 years now.  They have replaced my need, my hunger and interest for learning anything new.
What should I care if a new more powerful telescope goes up seeing more deeply into the same stuff the other one did.  If more has been discovered in quantum physics, so what ?  We are no closer to finding anything any more than the TV repairman is to finding the little people inside it . This is all inside the box.
The good news about this is I have rediscovered god and it is what keeps me sane.

I live in the east near NYC.  I'm sure this has contributed to my feelings here.  But this is where I belong.  I dont want advice.  I dont want someone to tell me to go outside. See nature, meditate , breathe and raise my vibration. I get it.

When I was a kid my grandparents would babysit us ,putting on pro wrestling on Saturday night. My grandfather told us it was fake. I couldn't believe it!
But I saw it grandpa! I saw it! Its real!

Reflecting on this today, not much has changed.

[Faylin]

to reignite your interest... qunatum entanglement suggest that a mans seed can quantum entangle with a womans womb and cause the birth of a child light years away.... this is possible.

reignite the flame by educating younger generations cause you may never know the quantum connection you might have. good luck bro. light and darkness be with you.

[Casey Claar]

Doug, it feels good just to say it, doesn't it? It sounds to me like you trading the drama in for the real world. So many are lost in confusing the two.

[thepainterdoug]

Many use this platform for varied reasons. I do to communicate my emotions to friends and others possibly receptive and feeling the same. I am an artist i live alone and for the most part do very well with it. Finding a mate is not my interest .

I trust the collective NDE recounts over most garbage I hear today including science On the other side, free of body, Ill find out about all entanglements and so on.
Im fine as I am, just need to call out to remember I exist.

Faylin. Im planning an online painting demo course. Ill announce to the group when ready

[RunningDeer]

Some of my on-going dos & reminders:

1. direct connection with Source
2. patience
3. stay grounded and the work gets done
4. be flexible
5. synchronicities and creative solution continue to flower
6. life is experience and experimentation

*********************

Below are helpful one liners I’ve picked up along the way:

• "Do I want to live the comfortable lie or live the uncomfortable truth?"
  
• "Is this good for me?" "Yes, until it’s not."
  
• Things that worked yesterday may not work today. Recalibrate daily.

[thepainterdoug]

Running Deer You are truly a Dear! Everyone of those markers resonates with me.

mainly no 2

[SilentFeathers]

The split in reality and all the uncertainty in an upside down highjacked world has taken its toll on many of us. It's the curse of being curious, paying attention, and caring what tomorrow may bring.
The spirit, soul, and total self must always be protected and kept in balance......very challenging with so many distractions for sure.

The human family has entered a time of great change, sometimes nothing more needs to be known.....

[Delight]

A few years ago I started thinking about how well I had learned to "be quiet" and I have been. Becoming an introvert I then loved absorbing information and tried to synthesize what I learned. However, I come now to see that every thing we "learn" is in a context of underlying structure that I call the SYSTEM. It is overweening and underpinning all that one can think.

I see something else that I call Qualities. These are felt and also have mental components. They IMO exist in OUR imaginative capacity that I see as real such that music of certain tones and frequencies FEELS like qualities like love, honor, grief, exulting joy ETC> I feel them as Universal and what art can evoke, why we are HUMAN creatives who manifest qualities into form.

One of the primary things I see about the SYSTEM is the way it uses USES our qualities and binds then into ROLES which are controlled. So for instance, as a feeling human I feel the qualities and the SYSTEM presents definitions as "what you do"... so being a qualitative being is identified with ROLES. We learn the ROLES (what some call the Game?)

I will share what I wish everyone could feel. Right NOW all around us is the essential FORCE which COULD feed us fully if we let it in. There is nothing wrong with us. We don't need to keep mulling over what we learned. We REALLY DO NOT NEED anything. NDEs and miracles show that this world is not what we think. Joe Dispenza's students show our body is malleable in an extreme way with appropriate attention, intent and ALLOWING the flow of energy.

I just want everyone to be happy and free. I imagine we each have a very particular stream of energy available (the Spirit Rope) which is where we can relax and allow the charge of energy to penetrate our whole being. It will be a relationship and it is natural. IMO the SYSTEM is throughout the material realm and one should NEVER believe the contents of the mind, what we have learned. IMO this is our adversary and our champion is all around us and our imagination can be freed.

[s7e6e]

Doug, just remember what you have seen in this story of yours and learn what it can be learned from it. This insanity is not my reality either, I'm just watching madness unfolding before my eyes and realizing my "home world" is eons more serene and emphatic than this predatory and opportunistic cesspool.

Let's not make the same mistakes next time around, shell we?

[ulli]

Early boomers are staring to turn eighty, and after seventy different interests appear on the screen of our lives.

NDEs can provide an answer to the question what comes next, after the “ashes to ashes, dust to dust” reality strikes.

The quest for God and eternity is by far the greatest quest of them all. Seek and you will find.

[thepainterdoug]

s7e6e

yes perhaps we shall. I think I have been angry that I agreed to coming to this place. yet I have a strange "love of the game" and I can fix it complex.

Delight, I need time think over things you have said. regarding NDE,s I have always heard and learned that we choose our parent and our life paths. And yet while here and forgetting that , we feel we are supposed to fix these choices.
We chose our sex, our race, and all. then we fight to change the injustices we perceive in these very situations. Seems almost like an odd experiment we are put thru. But then again, we chose it. Sort of like going to the amusement park and be willing to get on the rollercoaster, then throwing up on the ride.

[mojo]

Posted by thepainterdoug (here)
The good news about this is I have rediscovered god and it is what keeps me sane.

What a great response to all the other issues you wrote about. I hope more people can make that connection in a World that has gone upside down. So many of us have grown older on the forum and what a ride it has been. Sometimes we have questions & other times answers. We have helped each other through issues and concerns and also voiced some opposing views. Thanks to everyone that has made this happen. It's easy to get bogged down with everything out there but at the same time I know we are heading to something amazing. It was predicted long ago and we are living in this time that will bring a convergence of events. And also remember life is not a dress rehearsal.

[Heart to heart]

Doug, how your words resonate with me!

Once, many years ago, when I was out in the woods here on the island, and assisting Margo Williams in rescuing an earthbound spirit who needed to confess to some small or large misdemeanour during their lifetime, I caught sight of a large stone beneath a nearby tree. I was impressed to pick up this stone, expecting to find a host of insects sheltering beneath it. To my amazement there was not one! Nothing! So unusual! I remarked on this to Margo and knew I had to take it home with me. The stone spoke to something deep within me. It was no light weight and I was at least a mile from my car. Nevertheless carry it home I did.
I placed it beneath a tall copper beech tree in the garden of The Grove where I lived at the time, and there it lay for a long time. The house was eventually sold in 1998 and I forgot about the stone. Sometime around 2016 something jogged my memory of a stone laying beside a tree in a garden that no longer belonged to me. The house was now a holiday home and the wealthy family were rarely there. So I rang my neighbour, Mollie, whose home had been built in the paddock of The Grove and had a gate that still connected with the garden of my previous home. I told her there was a stone that was calling me and I needed to retrieve it from below the Beech tree where it had lain against the trunk for all those years. I had never returned before but she told me the family were not in residence and I was welcome.
With some trepidation I opened the old iron gate and made my way to the tree. There lay my stone just as I had placed it all those years before! Picking it up I hugged it to my heart and retraced my steps, thanked Mollie and drove home to put the stone beside the trunk of an old flowering cherry tree in the large garden where I lived with my daughter.
Once more I moved. This time to a tiny cottage with a very small garden, and again I forgot my stone in the hassle of moving from my daughter’s large house and garden. Once more I was reminded of the stone that lay abandoned there. Once more I returned to bring it home and here it has its final resting place with me, for I shall not be moving again.
Now to the point of my telling you this story.
There’s was NOTHING beneath that stone when I found it! And I loved it!
Thinking about that now, after all my years of accumulating knowledge from the amazing sources I have been privileged to work with, and sharing my stories on this forum, I am now slowly letting go until there is NO THING between me and my Source!
THIS WAS THE LESSON OF MY STONE.

Doug, there is a time for accumulating knowledge and there is a time for wisdom. The wisdom lies in becoming the knowledge you have acquired and shining it out to the world that appears so dark and forsaken, that is the reason we are here. And to remember that LOVE IS THE CONCEPT OF ETERNAL ACCEPTANCE!

We become the witness without judgement.

I suppose I will tell my stories when it is appropriate to do so, that is my gift.
And you will continue to paint the world you wish for. That is your gift for you have the eye of the artist.
Meantime we will both become LOVE ❤️

[Lunesoleil]

that if a lot of things have changed, since then we have also changed a lot 👽

[arwen]

Doug, you really hit the spot for a LOT of people. The artists ALWAYS articulate the soul, the Zeitgeist, of the people, express what others cannot even conceptualize. (That is also why artists are so heavily targeted by our Evil Overlords who want to do away with the soul altogether). Thank you for this post, and I feel with you every part of it - many of us do. I have nothing to add but I really wanted to acknowledge and thank you for your heartfelt post - there is great power and healing in articulating the Unnamed, and bringing it to the Surface.

My personal lifetime reference for this planet as it is right now:

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”
― J. Krishnamurti

[Mike]

Hey Doug, our trajectory is sort of the same.

I've left many of my previous interests behind, for the most part anyway. Not out of spite or anything, but simply because I've exhausted it all. Occasionally I'll try to revisit them, hoping it might spark something in me. But it just bores me mostly.

And like you, I've arrived at this curiosity about NDE's, and what comes next. But to be perfectly honest, I've exhausted all that too! I don't know if I could sit thru another NDE testimonial. I've seen a million now.

I described my mentality towards life to a friend recently as being like a student in high school, last period of the day, just staring at the clock and waiting for it all to end. I'm not suicidal in the least, I'm just tired. This heart ailment I've been dealing with has beaten me down finally. My light is dwindling.

What you described in your post sounds like a combination of demoralization (from the endless lies etc) and basic world weariness. I can appreciate that.

A longtime reader of mine on Medium left a comment on my last piece, saying "You're not funny anymore. What happened?" It annoyed me at first, but then I had to concede she had a point. Thing is, I'm not that interested in being funny anymore in my writing. I'm not that interested in the writing anymore either. I'm not that interested in anything really. Just kinda going thru the motions, staring at that clock..

I get little bits of inspiration here n there, but it comes far less frequently. Maybe it'll all change in some way, maybe I'll find another wind. I always try to remain hopeful! But I just don't see it happening.

Speaking of writing, you should post what you wrote here on Substack, if you haven't already. It's good stuff, and people will resonate with it, just like they are here.

[Jaak]

¨He who increases wisdom, increases sorrow¨ .
Sad truth about learning and understanding things .
After years and years of learning all kinds of things it didnt bring me much happines.Quite the opposite.
But all this knowledge and experience will mature your soul. And as M.P Hall sayd ¨"We grow from within. And as we grow stronger from within, the adversities from outside become less."¨
¨No matter how bad things around you get , you can get better ! ¨

Something that helps me to keep sanity and not dropping into negativity - gratitude.
We can cry endlessly about what we dont have but we forget about being grateful about what we do have.
Are you blind,deaf,disabled,chromosomicly challenged,freezing,starving,homeless or in horrible pain ? Hopefully not and be grateful that you aint . I have experienced several of those things and for me lack of serious discomfort is already comfortable...

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=2SH1jNAV-pI

[ExomatrixTV]

I wonder when someone dies, can die again in the "other realm" (in between worlds) because of having a certain level of eternal "fed up" vibrations.

• Or we all need a break (time out) once a while ... just to be away from it all.

How many Avalonians are put on "sabbatical" for that reason alone?

• Time Out
• Vacation
• Sabbatical
• Deep Needed Rest
• Having a Daily Healthy Good Night Sleep (Free from any Disturbances!).
• Real Meditation
• Free Your Mind from Being Overly Active
• Stop being on "High Alert Mode 24/7" (precursor to having Anxiety Attacks?)

etc. etc.

cheers,
John 🦜🦋🌳

[Blacklight43]

I'm with you Doug. I've been around the sun many times and yesterday was no exception. I'm getting tired (of all the crap I see on the internet) I spend a good deal of time praying these days. I long for this upside down world to make a u-turn and see good in all I observe. I love life, I love my life and the people in it.

I quit watching TV going on 5 years ago and found some peace in that but it has now taken over much of what I see on the internet. I depend on my gut instinct to tell me what is true or not.

I was once a working artist but gave that up when vision got blurry. Now I spend lots of time playing piano and listening to music. Now I find less interest in worldly happenings. I feel my caring about what happens doesn't make a difference in the outcome....maybe I'm just showing my age.

What I just realized is maybe we are all connected...maybe we are all ONE!

Carry on my friends.

Namaste. Darlene

[rgray222]

Hi Doug
Like you, I have lost interest in things that I once found tremendously stimulating and provocative. Little by little each one of the topics became less interesting and nonessential. The reason is that each subject has run its course and there is nothing more to process. For instance, this basket of topics (and more) consumed much of my time and many hours of thinking.

• I don't believe in UFOs/UAPs anyone - I no longer have to believe because I now know the truth. (knowing vs believing are entirely different)
• I don't believe in reincarnation anymore - I no longer have to believe because I now know the truth.
• I don't believe in God anymore - I no longer have to believe because I now know the truth.
• I don't believe in OBEs or NDEs anymore - I no longer have to believe because I now know the truth.
• I don't believe in Wars because they are contrived and meant to divide people.
• I don't believe in racial issues, politics, climate change, the pyramids, and much of human history because all of these topics are intentionally presented to our reality for growth through emotion and sometimes anger.
• This list could go on and on but I think you get my point.

Do I still have an interest in these things? Yes, because I am still living this human life. For instance, I want Trump to win tonight's debate by trouncing Biden. In the past, I would want Trump to win because I truly believed he would put humanity back on the right path but I will watch the debate for entertainment purposes only.

My point is that there is no longer a reason (for me) to search out answers on many topics, I now realize that all the lies and manipulation we are exposed to are necessary for our human experience. Just think about it, if everyone on the planet were thoughtful and considerate of others life would be rather boring. Imagine a world with no storms, no disasters, no sickness, no corruption, no wars, no racial division and all the media are honest journalists. At first, this may seem utopian and a romantic way to live but in very short order it would be the most boring world one could imagine. There would be little to learn by being human and virtually no growth opportunities.

I have been thinking and saying this for several years and I now believe it more than ever, all the answers that we are looking for lie within. Once you start looking within you can become more self-dependent, you can rely on yourself for happiness and purpose and you no longer need the approval of others. Outside validation is necessary until you finally reach a saturation point or a point of total frustration. Once you turn your focus inward and away from the outside world the answers start to make a lot more sense. Nothing is complex or difficult and the answers are so simple you often wonder why you did not see things right from the start.