Re: The Second Coming ~ Christ Within
No words...Posted by Pam (here)
I just want you to know that I hear your story,Irminsül and can relate to it in many, many ways. I am so very sorry about the death of your sister. I understand the psychic pain that can bring one to this level, that of self destruction. I have tried it myself several times and have never succeeded. My daughter did succeed.
I am a Christian, I was born in a family without Christian relative. When I was 17 years old, I had bipolar disorder, and I didn't grow up in a good environment. My dad are mental disabled, and the story of his illness can be traced back to a ghost encounter when he was a young man. If you are intereted about ghost attacked, I will talk more about my father's mental illness caused by the supernatural event. My twin sister and I witnessed my dad often losing control of his emotions and sometimes beating my mom and me In such a childhood, my personality became very sensitive and my ability to cope with stress was very poor. When I was in high school, I committed suicide due to bipolar disorder, and once I wrote an email to a classmate in Vancouver about my troubles and despair. At that time, my classmate prayed for me and changed the rest of my life. I don't really remember the exact content of the previous email, because it was more than ten years ago. I remember he said to me, "I'm a Christian, I'll pray for you." After my deskmate prayed for me, I suddenly felt that I was willing to go out and find a local church. At that time, I met an old woman who gave me a Bible, and I followed her to worship all the time, learning to read the Bible and sing hymns. The lady is the angel that God sent to me, and She became my soulmate.
After accepting Jesus as my Savior, my illness gradually improved, and I was baptized two years later. Then I left the big church and went to family fellowship, which was a partial Calvinist Reformed family church. Why I leave big church,you know sometimes I seek for God, the more I want to learn, he will lead you to a real way.
I have been a Christian for 15 years, and I have experienced illness in my life, as well as the death of a family member in a car accident. If I want to say that faith has changed me, I have the courage to live no matter how difficult the circumstances are. I just want to share some verses that inspire me.
'And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;And patience, experience; and experience, hope:And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.(Romans 5:3-6 KJV)'
Also as a Christian, I need to pray more to help the weakness,like people who are suffering in the war . 'I have shewed you all things, how that so labouring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.(Acts 20:35 KJV)'
'These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.(John 16:33 KJV)'
Hello Anyone! Thank you for sharing your personal story, Is. I read your post just when I needed it. I have also had bipolar disorder since I was 15. At first I went from depression to euphoria. At 18, after deep personal internal work, I managed to start only having episodes of euphoria. Because of this, I have been taking psychiatric medication since that time. With the support of my psychologist and psychiatrist, I do not need to be constantly medicated. I only take medication when I begin to perceive that I am going to have an episode of euphoria, which is 2 or 3 times a year. Each of these episodes usually lasts 2 weeks. In any case, obviously, I would prefer to have a “healthy” mind and not have to be on medication. As you well know, bipolarity is a mental illness that almost always accompanies those who suffer from it throughout their lives. In any case, I have had to bear this personal cross for 22 years now, so I accept my fate. It probably has to do with karma from past lives. I do value the fact that during my episodes of euphoria, I am much more creative and active. That is very good for me because I write, draw, create audiovisual content and I am a graphic designer. So those are periods of great productivity. I just consider that nothing happens by chance and that I have to live with this mental condition is part of God's plan. I continue to pray to the Creator to heal me and perhaps that will happen one day, I do not lose hope. There is a phrase in the Bible that I like very much and it is very beautiful: “Dear young people, if you want to serve God, prepare to face difficulties. Arm yourselves with great courage, and do not be afraid of misfortunes. Never turn away from God, and he will make you prosper. Whatever happens, endure suffering with patience. Gold is purified by fire, and we, by suffering.” Ecclesiasticus 2:1-5. Unfortunately, this is the way the world we live in is. Perhaps there will come a time when we will be able to stop having to incarnate on this planet full of so much pain and hardship. In the meantime, we must have faith, endure and do good.
In addition to what I told you about sharing the mental/emotional problem that you have, in March 2023, happened the most painful and sad thing I have ever experienced in my life. My 28-year-old sister committed suicide. She was one of the people I loved most in this life. For years we tried to help her as a family, because thank God there was always a lot of love between us. My parents and my brother always tried to tell her that she could get ahead. She went to therapy since she was 18 and tried to meditate and do other ways to feel well. But she had endogenous depression and suicidal thoughts for years. She was my friend as well as my sister, we could talk about everything, we shared the same kind of humor, the love for cats, movies and reading and many other things. In this past year and a half, I have cried more than in my entire life. I receive a lot of support from my family, relatives and friends, but at times it is still very difficult. In any case, I never stopped having faith in God and that is largely what sustains me. I know that everything happens for a reason, even though I cannot see it clearly now amidst so much pain.
I believe that all humans have to go through a Christ-like path and that involves suffering in order to advance on the spiritual path. Jesus himself was killed at the age of 33 and that is extremely significant and symbolic. His mother, father, brothers and disciples must have been devastated. Even though he resurrected later, he soon ascended to Heaven and became a memory in the hearts of those who loved him. His story is the most beautiful and sad that exists. All human beings are brothers in love and suffering. Thank you once again for sharing what was happening to you, as you may have seen, your story touched me. I send you a big hug and I hope you are well.
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I would be honored to talk to you on a personal level if you are so inclined. You can send me a PM if you would like to talk.
I find it very typical that no one acknowledged your post other than some thank you's. I find that it is not because they don't care, it is that it is very tough to say anything when these things happen. The "I'm so sorry" seems so trite so we ignore it.
You can talk to me, I have shared very similar experiences and although I don't think I have ever written about these things publicly, I felt drawn to do so. Your sister has a most beautiful smile. I am so happy you were able to capture that moment. My daughter had a beautiful smile too.
With love and understanding,
Pam
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