Blank Canvas

[RunningDeer]

Thanks for a clear picture and correction, Fred. Geez, yes, yes, and yes! to tools. The ones that we have and more and more are awakening too. Such as these:


- claircognizance via knowingness

- clairvoyance via visual
- clairsentience via feelings
- clairgustance via taste

- clairaudience via sound

- clairscent via smell
- clairtangency via touch

Cheers,
WhiteCrowBlackDeer

Posted by Fred Steeves (here)
@ sleepy. We're all psychic, it's inhehent by birth, but it's been long forgotten. It's there in all of us, but it tends to be ever so subtle. One of the things that really got the ball rolling for me with all this stuff, was going to a 3 day Matrix Energetics seminar back in '08. A fascinating education in quantum physics/healing, combined with exploration of the realms of infinite possibility. You all probably see me use that term "infinite possibility" quite often. Well, that's where I got it from.

Anyway, they teach hands on, how to tune in to our faint inner senses, and trust them. With a group of maybe 300 people, there were times where they would have us get up, mingle around, and team up with various people to practice on/with. After many inconsequential sessions, I was still convinced psychic type stuff only happened to other people. Well finally one session I got paired up with this girl, and we were to slowly scan with open hands each other from head to toe, not actually touching, and then stop as soon as something, no matter how seemingly bizarre, came to mind. Then we were to tell that person something about themselves from that.

It's kind of shy at first, and we each had a couple of turns to no avail. Then, I scanned her once more, just before it was time to retake our seats. I really let my mind go this time, loosened up, and started once more from her head area going downwards. I got down to the mid arm area, felt something funny, shrugged it off as nothing, and continued on down. Going back up, at mid arm area, same thing, that ever so faint funny feeling.

As I was pausing and wondering about this, I must have had a funny look on my face, because she asked me "well, what is it?". Slightly embarassed because I just knew it was nothing, I told her anyway. "It's probably really stupid, but I keep getting something about your elbows, both of them". Her eyes got wide as saucers, and her jaw dropped. "Oh my God, when I was a little girl, I fell out of a tree, and broke both of my elbows. They still hurt sometimes!"

THAT'S how sensitive this stuff can be sleepy. Like WCBD (Paula) was saying, trust your instincts. And relax.

Cheers,
Fred

[RunningDeer]

Posted by another bob (here)

Posted by PurpleLama (here)
I teach Ascension Reiki, and I have witnessed dozens upon dozens discover all manner of psychic abilities they never thought they had, before.

Thanks Fred and PL!

Reminds me of a time when I was working in Boston, maybe '77, and a few of us were given free passes to a Silva Mind Seminar. It was kind of rudimentary, but near the end of the seminar, we were all given five index cards with people's names on them, and we were asked to diagnose their illnesses remotely, with only the name (and maybe the state they resided), but nothing more to go on. Well, I felt into each name on the card and wrote my impressions of their particular issues, and when we were finished, the facilitator went through each card, and asked how many had said "cancer", or "broken arm" etc, and my jaw dropped when I realized that not only had I gotten all five right, but so had at least 2/3 of the class of about 30 people!

I’ve been a card carrying member of Silva Mind Control since 1972. The name on the card said “Joshua,” (forgot the state). Before his name was spoken, I began to have trouble sitting up. I felt dizzy and like I was choking. My tongue got in the way when I tried to talk.

Then, I applied the helmet technique. Where I put an energetic helmet of Joshua over my head. A visual popped up. He was a little boy about 4 who was mentally challenged, with poor balance. I picked up that there were things he wanted to say but it was frustrating to him that he couldn’t express. I had a sense that there were great ideas locked up. But by that point I felt like I was making up a story.

The information provided was Joshua was either 4-5 years old (I forgot exact number.) and mentally challenged.

At that time, Michael, my son, was about 10 months old. He had a growth near the corner of his eye. So I used one of the healing techniques from the seminar which was simply see it not there. So I did. I forgot about it until a couple of days later. It was gone. Only one application needed, or more precisely stated, only one belief needed.

I don't recall the percentages, but our group had great success, which served to reinforce the belief and its applications.

[another bob]

Posted by WhiteCrowBlackDeer (here)
I don't recall the percentages, but our group had great success, which served to reinforce the belief and its applications.

Great to see you also had that experience, Paula! Sheesh, there was such an explosion of new paradigm stuff coming out of that time, it was breath-taking. Of course, a lot of it has disappeared over the years, or gotten commercialized into pablum, but it was certainly exciting seeing and participating in so much expansive thinking and visionary considerations. I think people who did not live through the Eisenhower years cannot really appreciate the groundbreaking movements that we saw -- so much profound change in such a short time, both at the micro as well as the macro level! My sense is that the years to come will be even more dramatic in that respect, and it's great to be sharing these changes with folks like the Avalon crew!

Blessings!

[Flash]

I have a few awful feelings stories, here is one I just wrote to Norman who was inquiring about help for a child disappearance;

No, the children skills are alright (those that saw the little girl disappear in a white van). She must have known the person, unless she was a risk taker of something very attractive got her in.

I am not an intuitive, so I cannot help in this.

I wish children and any kidnap would stop all over the planet. You would not imagine how much training I had given to my daughter when she was 5 on being kidnap, because in America, there is 1 pedophile out of 600 people. In my neighborood of 3 steets with buildings and houses, this makes about 3 pedophiles.

Add to the the organised rings, this makes a lot.

Something almost happened to my daughter when she was 4, at the doctor's office. We were waiting for her to be called and there was a couple wainting with other peoples around. Then the men from the couple got up and came over to us and ask me if he could play a few magic tricks to my daughter, since waiting was so boring. I said yes. Then he plays few tricks and if is delighted. Finally he bend to her levels and pushed her legs. She said "mommy the mister is hurting me" I looiked at him and he said he was only trying to start a new trick did not mean hurting.
Then he asked my daughter where she is from. She answered Canada. He asked where her dad was. She said Turkey. He asked me if he was living there. I said no, he is back tonight. He asked for her name, she gave her usual name (but not her legal first name). By that time, I realised what was going on. He was doing the verbatim of what I had heard on Oprah Winfrey show, all the questions probing and the physical harm to see if she would speak out. Finally, we are called by the doctor's office, they call her by her legal first name and family, a name, she has but never used and her family name which is not on the phone book. They guy tells me "oh, you are ms A. B (both my daughter's names)" which I am not, here woman keep their single name. I was so glad my daughter had given such an vague description of her place of living, she did it only because we were back from months of living in Turkey and it is what she would answer over there.

We got in the doctor's office and I tell the doctor that he has a pedophile amongst his clients. He did not believe me. I gave the description, what else could I do. We get out the office and go to the crowded elevator. I get in with my daughter all squeezed in, not noticing anything wrong and as we get out, this guy is there holding my daugther's hand. I almost fainted, took her other hand and walked out fast pulling her, he was following holding her hand still. I told him I was parked way out, he said he was parked here, he could drive us to my car. I said no thanks I will walked.

We got in the car, I made a detour to make sure I was not being followed, and my daughter was saying "I like the mister, I want to see him" to which I responded "no darling the mister is a very bad man" and she argued "no, I like the mister, I like the mister, you are bad".

I could not believe that in such a short time with few interactions, he had hooked her already. Believe me, whatever you teach your children, they still might be grabbed, those pedohiles are that agiled with them.

Well, one of my little stories.

[Ron Mauer Sr]

Fred,

Couple of things we share. I've done skydiving (1977), twice on a static line, and Matrix Energetics (2007). Dr Bartlet pulled me out of the audience for his first demo. I was one of the few who did not fall down on the floor laughing.

Didn't expect to die with either experience. Although on the first jump out of the airplane I would not have cared. I was going through my first divorce.

Ron, M.S.U.

[Fred Steeves]

Posted by rmauersr (here)
Fred,

Couple of things we share. I've done skydiving, twice on a static line, and Matrix Energetics in 1977. Dr Bartlet pulled me out of the audience for his first demo. I was one of the few who did not fall down on the floor laughing.

What a trip Ron, I was one of the only ones who didn't react either. When he pointed at me to come on stage, I was like oh boy, what's it going to be like to be rolling around on the floor in hysterics, in front of 300 or so people, doing something silly. It didn't happen.

In hindsight though, I see something special did indeed happen in that time/place, it just wasn't in the way it was expected. Little did I know that me, Young Grasshopper, was already on his way down the wishing well, just didn't know it yet.(LOL)

Cheers,
Fred

[Arrowwind]

Posted by WhiteCrowBlackDeer (here)
[Then, I applied the helmet technique. Where I put an energetic helmet of Joshua over my head. A visual popped up..

I learned almost the exact same technique in '75 from a Minister of Religious Science in a little church I used to go to for healing work and study... except we didn't mess around with a helmet... we put people's whole heads on. It too was very effective and we used it to read peoples minds and to make diagnosis with a high degree of accuracy amongst the group so i know the reality of what you speak of. When I worked as a nurse I had a lot of hangups about sticking people with needles and I selected jobs which avoided it. Then the day came when I could avoid no longer... so I found a nurse who was pretty expert in making a stick even in difficult veins... I put her head on and had 100% success... except in one case where I failed so I went and got her to do it and wouldn't you know it...she failed too... after that I used the technique to actually mentor myself in other aspects of my work though selecting folks who knew the job well by putting their heads on. Before long I didnt need to do it much at all. It was like before long I could just say to myself, how would Dr So and So do this or counselor so and so manage that... Its an advanced form of modeling where you interface energetically somehow... and always with the intend of "the highest good for all" when it is done.

A more recent group that teaches the technique is called Theta Healing.... I learned this stuff for almost free...now it costs a bunch of money.. shame shame shame.

[1inMany]

This isn't going to come close to what you guys have shared, but you know what I wish I could do on this blank canvas? Take the color of guilt and add every color of light there is until it looks like the dew in the morning. Like a beautiful jewel. And then I would paint the canvas with something that was once painful, a reminder of the painful, but now beautiful and integrated. And I would absorb this beauty with all my senses and fill myself up with it.

Love you guys,

[another bob]

Posted by 1inMany (here)
This isn't going to come close to what you guys have shared, But you know what I wish I could do on this blank canvas? Take the color of guilt and add every color of light there is until it looks like the dew in the morning. Like a beautiful jewel. And then I would paint the canvas with something that was once painful, a reminder of the painful, but now beautiful and integrated. And I would absorb this beauty with all my senses and fill myself up with it.

Love you guys,

That is beautiful, Sister, and a much appreciated creation for our canvas!

Blessings!

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Arrowwind (here)

Posted by WhiteCrowBlackDeer (here)
[Then, I applied the helmet technique. Where I put an energetic helmet of Joshua over my head. A visual popped up..

I learned almost the exact same technique in '75 from a Minister of Religious Science in a little church I used to go to for healing work and study... except we didn't mess around with a helmet... we put people's whole heads on. It too was very effective and we used it to read peoples minds and to make diagnosis with a high degree of accuracy amongst the group so i know the reality of what you speak of. When I worked as a nurse I had a lot of hangups about sticking people with needles and I selected jobs which avoided it. Then the day came when I could avoid no longer... so I found a nurse who was pretty expert in making a stick even in difficult veins... I put her head on and had 100% success... except in one case where I failed so I went and got her to do it and wouldn't you know it...she failed too... after that I used the technique to actually mentor myself in other aspects of my work though selecting folks who knew the job well by putting their heads on. Before long I didnt need to do it much at all. It was like before long I could just say to myself, how would Dr So and So do this or counselor so and so manage that... Its an advanced form of modeling where you interface energetically somehow... and always with the intend of "the highest good for all" when it is done.

A more recent group that teaches the technique is called Theta Healing.... I learned this stuff for almost free...now it costs a bunch of money.. shame shame shame.

Hi Arrowwind,

It sounds like the head and helmet technique is the same, just different vocabulary. I'm a big believer in just keep things simple. Get out of the way and so it is. Period. Otherwise for me, I'm in my head with a check off list. Ha!

BTW: That was a heart touching piece you wrote earlier on Pandora's Box. And thank you for the acknowledgement. Peace...

[CdnSirian]

Posted by sleepy (here)
I don't have a story but a confession:

I am not enlightened. I have no recollection of any past lives. I have never traveled outside my body. (I don’t even like flying in planes). When I read Carmody’s posts, half of the time I don’t understand them. I have tried meditating only to find myself aware of the refrigerator humming or the clock ticking and I have never been connected to “the one,” “the universe” or whatever it is I am supposed to connect with. I have instincts but I am not psychic and often I find myself to be bad judge of character. I have never met an alien and I have never seen a UFO. I have never seen anyone turn into a lizard. I hear there are 11 dimensions but I have never been to parallel universe and I am probably pretty 3D. Sometimes I think others aren’t as enlightened as they think they are or they wouldn’t be so mean. I didn’t know I had an ego body but if I do I hope it is in better shape than me.

I do believe we are all connected and that much of this enlightenment stuff is just another way of saying love yourselves so you can love others.
In some ways I believe I am awake but at times reading in this forum I feel very sleepy.

Maybe you're just "right here right now". The goal some strive towards for lifetimes...

[CdnSirian]

Posted by Arrowwind (here)

Pandora’s Box

Paula’s experience spurred this writing. It’s not a commentary on her words in any way
but only a reflection it stirred within myself
within my own hall of mirrors.

The experience of Death is the most profound of all our teachers. It is the most feared and the most respected. The most dreaded and the most celebrated, right next to birth in its impact and importance. I’ve never had the challenge of facing the death of one of my children and even writing these words brings a sense of trepidation. Because I have been so intimate with death and those who are walking the death walk I have examined many possibilities for my own, but also for my children and it is my most dreaded fear, beyond my own, beyond my husbands, beyond all else and fierce enough if unchecked could wreak havoc with the world. Regardless, I’m pretty good at stuffing it in a box and ignoring it. There is no therapy, no psychological perspective, no self realization, no letting go that can resolve or remove it. It feels ingrained into each cell of my body, visceral, palpable, when I allow myself to entertain the thoughts and the only place I've found to keep this fear in control is within a tightly sealed box.

Like the pandora’s box, I keep it well hidden, away from strangers, and most of all away from my children. In effort to protect their innocence and fearlessness they will never know about its presence and I think I am doing what countless mothers do. Keeping the stiff upper lip and the perpetual smile on as they go through the escapades of life. No one knows about this box,except me.

Why is it that one should have such fears, locked in a box? Is it normal orcrazy? I tend to think that that countlessmothers carry these fears... repressed, hidden, covered with platitudes of lifeand living. I know this box became very real for me the day our neighbors son,two doors down, was blown away on his front porch in a racially motivated driveby shooting. My own children were both under five years old at the time. Theirswas just becoming a young man, at 20. I SAW clearly just how vile the world could be and how that vileness could turn on you or anyone in a split second, without warning, without mercy, without even a fleeting thought towards the beauty and wonder of life it destroys.

Why did this happen? Will it happen to us? To my child? The only answer I could come up with, was yes, in this world, it could happen, at any second. Be ready, but most of all live life without fear for if you don’t each day is stolen from you, and the shadow of death has already taken the very best away... so I keep things locked in a box, deep within, and live each day like that box does not even exist. I hope to die with it unopened, unrevealed and untouched by the experiences of this life. I hope to never need such hope for survival and healing… that kind of hope that intrinsically comes with our sealed box.

These boxes come into our lives in many ways. I don’t think I was born with mine. It seems like it was acquired, that it came with the territory of living, agift of experience, born out of observation of reality. Mine came from a driveby shooting. Other mothers, they get their box in other ways. Some inherit them from their own mothers, seeing the death of a sibling, worries and fears regarding disease and accidents and falls, and so many things that can steal a child or any loved one for that matter. All the potential realities of death seem senseless and even endless, all of them are sudden and shocking, even if well known in advance. In my work I’ve been able to peer into many a mother’sbox as they have dealt with it blowing open in their faces. On these days I have gone home and thanked god, thanked the universe, thanked all the powers that be in my circle of self that it was not me and mine…at least not today andI have grieved for those who’s day it was, which is in reality a grieving for oneself within our interconnected humanity.

It is always someone’s day and we must remember that lest we become too complacent and too trusting and too confident in life. We must be ready forthat box to fly open and know that we will somehow survive it. Our inate ability to survive, it seems, is the only power we really have to endure and still the healing takes much longer than the mere survival, but in time we can close and hide the box once more and live life in the sun, and pretend to forget for a time that death and its minions are stalking us all.

From Wiki:

“In classical Greek mythology,Pandora was the first woman on Earth. Zeus ordered Hephaestus, the god of craftsmanship,to create her, so he did—using water and Earth.[4] The gods endowed her with many gifts: Athenaclothed her, Aphrodite gave her beauty, and Hermes gave her speech.

When Prometheus stole fire fromheaven, Zeus took vengeance by presenting Pandora to Epimetheus, Prometheus'brother. With her, Pandora was given a beautiful container which she was not toopen under any circumstance. Impelled by her curiosity given to her by the gods,Pandora opened it, and all evil contained therein escaped and spread over theearth. She hastened to close the container, but the whole contents had escaped,except for one thing that lay at the bottom, which was the Spirit of Hope namedElpis. Pandora was deeply saddened by what she had done, and was afraid that she would have to face Zeus' wrath, since she had failed her duty; however,Zeus did not punish Pandora, because he knew this would happen.”

I was delivered such a box last year. My child is ok today, but I'm still in recovery....I truly thought I would die.

I am speechless at all your stories, all above. I have a slow reaction time to this kind of sharing...I might get a story or two out eventually. But I am awed by the experiences and the revelations. Thanks all.

[mosquito]

Posted by another bob (here)

Posted by Fred Steeves (here)
I'll spare the details, just that one was from slipping down the face of a fifty foot cliff....

Ah, OK, I can definitely relate to that one .....

Me too !!!

I and a group of friends were on a retreat in Wales, and one day we were walking along the stream in he valley, and when we decided to go back, we thought it would be nivce to climb out of the water. So we climbed about 10 feet up onto a ledge, and saw that there wasn't really an easy path back. The way back down looked a bit risky, lots of loose stones, and yours truly is a coward, so I suggested we carry on up, and walk back along the top. The others all agreed. It soon became clear that we'd bitten off more than we could chew, especially me, with no head for heights, AND wearing wellington boots, 2 sizes too big for me. The angle of this hill must have been at least 50 degrees, and here we were crawling up it, on all fours. I was petrified, underfoot was very very unstable, loose earth and tiny pebbles, and I was holding onto very short strands of grass in order to keep from falling to my death. At 1 point, we looked across to the nearest road, wher a crowd had gatheed on the bridge to watch these 4 idiots doing goat impressions. We managed to have a good laugh thankfully. I had to really push through the fear and eventually we got to the top. The message I'd been getting from the beginning was "don't go back". Which I should have applied to a life situation that I was in the midst of .... but that's another story.

Nancy: - Another mind blowing story, I agree with Bob, your autobiography would be a great read !!!

[mosquito]

This is becoming a very healing thread, it's so moving to hear people's stories and to see what being human is really all about, thank you everyone for sharing.

Back to when my first wife was in prison ...... This ended up being an incredibly transformative event in my life. During the first week of her imprisonment, I went to visit a homoeopath she'd been seeing, and my life changed. I'd always wanted to be a doctor, but after a disastrous childhood and a school life that taught me nothing, I gave up on that dream. But here I was, in November 1988 in an office in Watford having the veil lifted from my eyes - I could practise alternative medicine ! I eventually decided to study Chinese Medicine, which was a wonderful journey for me, and I never looked back. It wasn't just a different medical paradigm that I became aware of though. My wife would tell me about books she'd read which she wanted me to buy, books on all sorts of esoteric stuff that I'd never before heard of, and I slowly became aware of an alternative way of viewing the world. I also had my eyes opened to the layers of society I didn't know existed. I learned all about the underclass, the people that the media doesn't tell you exist, about the injustices, the fit-ups, about the mother and baby unit in Holoway prison. I also saw people who were less fortunate than me struggling to visit their loved ones on a regular basis (they don't imprison them near you, they send them as far away as they can), and most of these people had more dignity than any of the self-proclaimed "elites", and I respected them.

It's often tempting to look back on life and think about our "mistakes" and to wonder what would be different if only ...... But my attitude is that something is only a mistake if you allow it to be. Whenever I start to think "what if .." I always tell myself - "look at where I am NOW, what I have, what I'm doing. I'm really blessed, and every event on my path has led me here, so none of them were mistakes".

[another bob]

Posted by mariposafe (here)
It's often tempting to look back on life and think about our "mistakes" and to wonder what would be different if only ...... But my attitude is that something is only a mistake if you allow it to be. Whenever I start to think "what if .." I always tell myself - "look at where I am NOW, what I have, what I'm doing. I'm really blessed, and every event on my path has led me here, so none of them were mistakes".

Great insight, wonderfully articulated!

Blessings!

[Eram]

So wonderful to read al your stories people.
Just wonderful.

Nothing serious or life challenging comes to mind, but I have a story of a lighter kind to share today.


Help from the other side

Some 12 years ago, my grand dad past away.
He fell from the stairs and broke an arm and had some bruises. He was 87 at the time and in good health.
In the hospital though, he declared to visiting relatives that he had done in life what he wanted to do and that he now wished to be with his past away wife again, who died about 8 years before that. His condition was still good and a full recovery was eminent, but his wish to leave here and reunite with his wife simply made his body gave up and he died in the 2 days to come.

I was unaware of all this. I only knew that he had an accident and that he was recovering in hospital.
At the night of his passing, I had a dream.
My grandparents made a big deal about throwing family parties every now and then, so that all of their children and grand children could meet and have a great bonding day.
This dream was in a party centre where they used to have their parties. I walked around there, having fun and every time I walked passed my grand dad, he would grab me and give me a big hug, which was not quite like him (not his type of giving affection).
After he did this several times, I began to be suspicious about it and turned to him and asked what this was all about.
I looked up at him, while he was hugging me and I saw two eyes with the brightest loving light in them and all he did was looking down at me from his 6.5 foot hight. He didn't say a word. I was filled with deep feelings of love and saying goodbye.

The telephone woke me up the next morning and it was my father and I instantly knew that my grandfather had passed away.
He didn't needed to tell me.......... I told him.

I was still in my years of apathy and feeling depressed at that time and I thought it a good idea to write a letter to my grand dad, asking him for support from where he was now. I threw the letter next to his coffin while he was being buried and I forgot all about it.

6 years later, my dad called me and he was a bit clumsy and shy to tell me what he had to say.
In a conversation with some friends in a restaurant, he met a woman and he suddenly felt a uncontrollable urge to ask her for her e-mail address to give it to me so that we (me and this woman) could make contact and see what happens. a match making kind of action.
This was very unusual for my dad and I was not very receptive for this kind of pushing around or help or whatever. I didn't feel comfortable with it at all.

Well, I mailed her anyway, just out of courtesy, because she was probably expecting it....... The rest is history....... We live together now with 2 beautiful children.

In the early stages of our relation we went to a woman who makes beautiful power shields (native American style) to buy one.
She is also clairvoyant and while we where telling her how we met, she suddenly asked me if my grandfather from fathers side was still alive.
I told her that he died some years ago and she then told me that she felt that it was him that had done the match making through my father. It was him who channelled through my father to make this happen.

This woman did not know and we only figured it out afterwards that both my grand dad and my girlfriend had worked in the police force. The name of my late grand mother is Marie and my girlfriend is named Marieke.

I always feel and felt that this relation with her saved me in a way and the birth of my 2 children certainly did.

So, 6 years after my plea for help, my grand father showed up and answered....... big time!

Go figure!

[HURRITT ENYETO]

Posted by sleepy (here)
I don't have a story but a confession:

I am not enlightened. I have no recollection of any past lives. I have never traveled outside my body. (I don’t even like flying in planes). When I read Carmody’s posts, half of the time I don’t understand them. I have tried meditating only to find myself aware of the refrigerator humming or the clock ticking and I have never been connected to “the one,” “the universe” or whatever it is I am supposed to connect with. I have instincts but I am not psychic and often I find myself to be bad judge of character. I have never met an alien and I have never seen a UFO. I have never seen anyone turn into a lizard. I hear there are 11 dimensions but I have never been to parallel universe and I am probably pretty 3D. Sometimes I think others aren’t as enlightened as they think they are or they wouldn’t be so mean. I didn’t know I had an ego body but if I do I hope it is in better shape than me.

I do believe we are all connected and that much of this enlightenment stuff is just another way of saying love yourselves so you can love others.
In some ways I believe I am awake but at times reading in this forum I feel very sleepy.

Thank You Sleepy, awesome post
You just summed up a fair few of us there I reckon
And anybody who claims to be 'enlightened' isn't. If they were, they wouldn't be here would they!
So don't worry about it, your pretty well switched on methinks



Hurritt

[Fred Steeves]

Posted by mariposafe (here)

It's often tempting to look back on life and think about our "mistakes" and to wonder what would be different if only ...... But my attitude is that something is only a mistake if you allow it to be. Whenever I start to think "what if .." I always tell myself - "look at where I am NOW, what I have, what I'm doing. I'm really blessed, and every event on my path has led me here, so none of them were mistakes".

I concur in spades my friend. Wouldn't it be a nightmare to find yourself old, dying, and reliving all your "mistakes" as regrets? Gives me the shivers.

One of the worst "mistakes" I ever made was joining the navy back in '93. But you know what? If I hadn't, I would never have met my lovely wife of 14 years. Funny how these things have a way of working together, the sacred dance of dark and light.

Say, wanna see a funny? Here's my boot camp picture. (LOL)

[sleepy]

Arrowind,

I also have what I shall now refer to as Pandora’s Box. And just to have the box cracked open was so horrifying and frightening, it gripped me with a fear that ran down to my bones. I guess I shall share a story. A story felt by many in my community and some were not able to slam the box shut.

It is a story about my one and only child. My beautiful daughter, she is a big movie buff and goes to all the premiers. The movie theatre closest to her home is the Century 16, movie theatre in Aurora, Colorado. I knew she went to the movies that fateful night of the Aurora shootings and as soon as I saw the news I was consumed with fear and desperate to reach her. I called her and she didn’t answer her phone. I can’t even put into words the desperation and terror that filled me. The fear was palpable and it was all I could do to function. Time stood still and I thought I couldn’t breath. Please dear God do not let this be happening. I ran upstairs to wake my husband and tell him what was going on.

The news was not any help. What I did know was that there were unidentified bodies still in the theatre and that my daughter did not answer her phone. Yes, that morning I opened Pandora’s box. I couldn’t help but wonder if she was scared or hurting in her last moments and I went all of the places that a mother dare not tread.

My husband was going to her apartment and I was going to wait by the phone. And then the phone rang. My beautiful, precious child said, “Mom I am O.K.” I was filled with joyous relief and I could physically feel the fear drain from my body. In an instant that joyous relief turned to sorrow for all of the loved ones that would not get that call.

I was able to slam Pandora’s Box closed that day and hide it away, hopefully forever. But it is always there. It is the price we pay for loving someone that much.

@ Paula, if I may call you Paula, Mom to mom; I am so very sorry for the pain you went through.

[sleepy]

Another Bob,

“Enlightened behavior”, I like it and I strive to behave in a way that is loving and or enlightened. I guess when I say sleepy, I don’t mean in the physical sense. Uneducated or ignorant is what I am referring to.

As Fred says, “@ sleepy. We're all psychic, it's inhehent by birth, but it's been long forgotten.”

@ Fred I believe this to be true but I have never tried to tap into it. Maybe what I call intuition is pshycic ability. I guess I am uneducated in this area. Something I think I should look into. My daughter tells me I am very pshycic but I never believed I was. Hmmmmm.


@Cdnsirian,
“Maybe you're just "right here right now". The goal some strive towards for lifetimes... “ What a lovely thought. Thank you.

@Hurritt,
“Thank You Sleepy, awesome post
You just summed up a fair few of us there I reckon
And anybody who claims to be 'enlightened' isn't. If they were, they wouldn't be here would they!
So don't worry about it, your pretty well switched on methinks ”
Who Knew? And all this time I was worried it was just me.

My Sincere gratitude for all of your replies and to everyone sharing.
sleepy