Something Real

[sirayah]

Hi CurtisW, thank you for sharing your experiences. I have been open to recieving more information regarding your first share of "vomiting you heart into your hands".
First, for myself reading into this share I felt something missing..have not pinned it down, but am guided to stay open to this, as if a piece of the puzzel will emerge.

And now another share regarding the heart releasing....this time feeling the detachment...the separation from body, emotions. Yet from your share you feel almost as if
this represented protection of sorts because you displayed the inablitiy for your heart to be burnt...and specifically for your father. So yes, I feel as you do, that you are uncovering the vieling of the heart.
"I think the fact that it's a heart is significant, as metaphorically anyway, my heart/ability to love/connect had been pretty badly damaged in childhood, and even now I struggle to open up and be connected with people in open, trusting ways. But, at the same time, I feel there is a lot of energy there for me to connect to that has so far eluded me. "

Do you feel that not all of "you" is present? within the embodiment of physicallity emotinonally and or spiritually? This may be why I am feeling such gaping energy here...it is as if a call is being placed but there are segments of information missing.

I do not feel that being partitally not present is off or bad whatever..but when the time comes, I do feel that we are guided to call our wholeselves into the current space of being and from this I feel is where our essence births forth full force.

Have you worked with Shamans of any sort for recall of being? interesting share, thank you again for being open to this process blessings S

[Curt]

Posted by sirayah (here)
Hi CurtisW, thank you for sharing your experiences. I have been open to recieving more information regarding your first share of "vomiting you heart into your hands".
First, for myself reading into this share I felt something missing..have not pinned it down, but am guided to stay open to this, as if a piece of the puzzel will emerge.

And now another share regarding the heart releasing....this time feeling the detachment...the separation from body, emotions. Yet from your share you feel almost as if
this represented protection of sorts because you displayed the inablitiy for your heart to be burnt...and specifically for your father. So yes, I feel as you do, that you are uncovering the vieling of the heart.
"I think the fact that it's a heart is significant, as metaphorically anyway, my heart/ability to love/connect had been pretty badly damaged in childhood, and even now I struggle to open up and be connected with people in open, trusting ways. But, at the same time, I feel there is a lot of energy there for me to connect to that has so far eluded me. "

Do you feel that not all of "you" is present? within the embodiment of physicallity emotinonally and or spiritually? This may be why I am feeling such gaping energy here...it is as if a call is being placed but there are segments of information missing.

I do not feel that being partitally not present is off or bad whatever..but when the time comes, I do feel that we are guided to call our wholeselves into the current space of being and from this I feel is where our essence births forth full force.

Have you worked with Shamans of any sort for recall of being? interesting share, thank you again for being open to this process blessings S

Hi Sirayah,

Thanks for looking at this, and for putting it into the context of the previous dream I shared.

You've touched on something that rings very true for me: I am not fully present. Not ever. In fact, I feel about 10-15% present a great deal of the time.

I'm not a big fan of inhabiting my body fully.

My consciousness is, it seems, often engaged elsewhere. I'm not sure how much of this is my being a day dreamer and lacking focus, and how much of it is, as you've suggested, maybe about a portion of the self/spirit that is off doing other things.

I am at a place where calling back these elements is becoming very important, though. I'm going to need a much more significant part of myself to do some of the things I feel called to do.

I haven't worked with a shaman, but have had some aware people mention to me the idea that I often 'hang out outside my body', and that I'm not entirely present.

In dreams, I certainly go all over the place and have a great deal of freedom of movement. Maybe that's a better expression for how I could be in regular 3d waking consciousness if I were more present.

The heart vision was a promising one, and felt very empowering. It was a nice gift from the universal mind letting me know that this essence is strong and cannot be destroyed.

Thanks again for taking the time to look at this. It is much appreciated.

[sirayah]

Hi Curtis well I know what you are referring to not wanting to be in the body fully and from my own experiences I do not feel many people are actually
in their body...just portions....that vacancy mixed into/harmonizing through the various levels makes for an uncomfortable existence at some points. We seem to adapt to not being fully present and steer life from an disjointed/removed/altering perspective.

Just this past Dec I had an experience/shift where a large part of my consciousness did drop in... I was so suprised because it felt opposite to what I was fearing or staying away from....it felt empowering and totally awesome. I chose at the moment to stay instead of run.....it was an ah ha moment en masse! celebration time! So we can reroute and come into hold the space fully.

With you though, I do feel something a bit "more segmented or displaced as if void"... now this could come from your birth trauma and I would not be surprised if this is the root. As well, energies can be held or kept outside in other "zones" - hidden from our awareness ...this is where assistance can come in to facilitate process. It will be interesting to unravel. I know the energy will work now to point you in the right direction as we are being lead to our own unvieling in perfect timing. Please keep us posted and thank you for sharing!

[Curt]

Posted by sirayah (here)
Hi Curtis well I know what you are referring to not wanting to be in the body fully and from my own experiences I do not feel many people are actually
in their body...just portions....that vacancy mixed into/harmonizing through the various levels makes for an uncomfortable existence at some points. We seem to adapt to not being fully present and steer life from an disjointed/removed/altering perspective.

Just this past Dec I had an experience/shift where a large part of my consciousness did drop in... I was so suprised because it felt opposite to what I was fearing or staying away from....it felt empowering and totally awesome. I chose at the moment to stay instead of run.....it was an ah ha moment en masse! celebration time! So we can reroute and come into hold the space fully.

With you though, I do feel something a bit "more segmented or displaced as if void"... now this could come from your birth trauma and I would not be surprised if this is the root. As well, energies can be held or kept outside in other "zones" - hidden from our awareness ...this is where assistance can come in to facilitate process. It will be interesting to unravel. I know the energy will work now to point you in the right direction as we are being lead to our own unvieling in perfect timing. Please keep us posted and thank you for sharing!

Hi Sirayah,

I'm certainly open to a shamanic experience that could bring the various pieces back together (or together for the first time). I like the image, and I find it powerful.

You mentioned zones that could keep back or hide from our awareness portions of the whole self. If you're open to sharing more about this--these zones-- I'd be happy to hear more about it.

Thanks again.

[sirayah]

Hi CurtisW,

From my experience when moving to integrate consiousness into present awareness I have worked with a few faciliators en route and will continue to do so as called.
I have found at certain junctures when one feels the call to move on/shift yet something is not seen/feels stuck another can augment the process by seeing into the field and
addressing the balancing as I call it.

As a river flows and we may come along to a portion which is augmented with an arrangement of branches which may create a sub pool/zone blocking flow and affecting levels (both horizontally and vertically)..this is where another can assist(based on an alternate perspective) to releave the dam or build up...within this dam or pool there exists a pocket of your signature and once released it integrates and reorders perspective to alter the awareness as crescendo effect occurs.

I find the most specific work we do here is reintegration of original or organic self/essence...sorting through variations..I feel we all have the call to be our most natural expression...yet there are many road blocks.... yet for myself this stepping stone process has been highly effective so far or specifing our tuning is another way to see it.
I hope this helps..... S

[Curt]

Have had a large amount of tidal wave dreams the past few years.

In many cases a giant skyscraper sized wave comes right up to the edge of the town or city I'm in and hangs high over the whole landscape.

It casts a massive shadow and continues to grow ominously. It builds straight up into the sky. But it never quite breaks.

It feels like it never breaks because I'm in control of whether it breaks.

It's not a lucid dream, per se, but I do have some awareness in the dream that I can keep the wave from crashing down, which is why I'm not as worried (in the dream) as I might otherwise be.

[Fred Steeves]

Posted by CurtisW (here)
Have had a large amount of tidal wave dreams the past few years.

In many cases a giant skyscraper sized wave comes right up to the edge of the town or city I'm in and hangs high over the whole landscape.

I have those too Curtis, most recently just last week. Except in mine they roll right on in and devastate.

[sirayah]

Posted by CurtisW (here)
Have had a large amount of tidal wave dreams the past few years.

In many cases a giant skyscraper sized wave comes right up to the edge of the town or city I'm in and hangs high over the whole landscape.

It casts a massive shadow and continues to grow ominously. It builds straight up into the sky. But it never quite breaks.

It feels like it never breaks because I'm in control of whether it breaks.

It's not a lucid dream, per se, but I do have some awareness in the dream that I can keep the wave from crashing down, which is why I'm not as worried (in the dream) as I might otherwise be.

Hi CurtisW! I felt whew (excitement energy) from this post...what do you think about the city being representative of a larger scale of self? Many people liken a house to represent our more personal space physical reality..would a city represent where we connect more into the collective field? I do feel that all is one in that everything is interconnected and representive of the whole..so it is the navigation of the whole and the interpretations which I find can bring further realization...to me energy moves as waves....so a large wave mounting in stature as it connects to resistence, which illuminates shadow.....at some point gates open and the wave floods in , tearing up, clearing and infusing...after integration a new state is present. I have long been interested in how specifically each one of us are physicially connected to the earth (the specific geographical locations) as we are in essence hubs and our interaction with the surroundings envokes specific shifts. I now live on the East Coast of Canada...the energy here feels heavy and locked down where I feel energy on the West coast feels more open and free....
as we shift our vibrations we sometimes will get placed into anther geographical local...such as I am about to do! So in essence I feel the dream represents an aspect of your specific grid work
Thank you for sharing once again! Blessings S

[Curt]

Fred,

That's intense. Where are you in the dreamscape when that happens? Are you smack dab in the middle of it, or are you high and dry?

Posted by Fred Steeves (here)

Posted by CurtisW (here)
Have had a large amount of tidal wave dreams the past few years.

In many cases a giant skyscraper sized wave comes right up to the edge of the town or city I'm in and hangs high over the whole landscape.

I have those too Curtis, most recently just last week. Except in mine they roll right on in and devastate.

[sirayah]

Airplanes, for years I have had recurring dreams that I am witnessing an airplane taking off into a beautiful prestine cloudless sky, the scene is one of joy and upliftment...yet then my innerknowing tells me "this plane is going to crash"...then it subsequently does...
the dreams have evolved to me acutally being on the plane, experiencing the crashes....I always live and am not too stirred up by the process..just what is...
I feel this particular sequence is the sub-conscious fear mechanism speaking...making its presence known...
S

[Curt]

Hi Sirayah,

I think it makes sense that the city or town would be an extension of the self in the dream, especially in the tidal wave dream(s) I've described because in them, I'm basically alone.

And I like your point about energy being waves and the connection to energies and geographical locations. This is a fascinating subject that I know you have special insight into.

You mentioned changes in energy accompanying changes in locale--and your upcoming move.

I have changed locations recently, too. I've moved here to Scotland from the Northeastern US.

Posted by sirayah (here)

Posted by CurtisW (here)
Have had a large amount of tidal wave dreams the past few years.

In many cases a giant skyscraper sized wave comes right up to the edge of the town or city I'm in and hangs high over the whole landscape.

It casts a massive shadow and continues to grow ominously. It builds straight up into the sky. But it never quite breaks.

It feels like it never breaks because I'm in control of whether it breaks.

It's not a lucid dream, per se, but I do have some awareness in the dream that I can keep the wave from crashing down, which is why I'm not as worried (in the dream) as I might otherwise be.

Hi CurtisW! I felt whew (excitement energy) from this post...what do you think about the city being representative of a larger scale of self? Many people liken a house to represent our more personal space physical reality..would a city represent where we connect more into the collective field? I do feel that all is one in that everything is interconnected and representive of the whole..so it is the navigation of the whole and the interpretations which I find can bring further realization...to me energy moves as waves....so a large wave mounting in stature as it connects to resistence, which illuminates shadow.....at some point gates open and the wave floods in , tearing up, clearing and infusing...after integration a new state is present. I have long been interested in how specifically each one of us are physicially connected to the earth (the specific geographical locations) as we are in essence hubs and our interaction with the surroundings envokes specific shifts. I now live on the East Coast of Canada...the energy here feels heavy and locked down where I feel energy on the West coast feels more open and free....
as we shift our vibrations we sometimes will get placed into anther geographical local...such as I am about to do! So in essence I feel the dream represents an aspect of your specific grid work
Thank you for sharing once again! Blessings S

[Fred Steeves]

Posted by CurtisW (here)
Fred,

That's intense. Where are you in the dreamscape when that happens? Are you smack dab in the middle of it, or are you high and dry?]

Oh man, I'm always right smack dab in the middle of it bro. The last one, I was eating at one of those all around windowed restaurants on top of a skyscraper, about 50 stories. One side overlooked the water which was maybe a mile or so away, and the customers began murmuring and pointing that direction. When I looked, there was a huge wave forming on the horizon, and coming towards us. It came crashing in just like a tsunami, and swept right through the city streets below. Everybody was like HOLY S**t!!!".

Atleast we were safe being so high up thank God, but just then a second wave was already forming far out, it was bigger, and it was coming in strong as well. When this one came through, it swept right over the top of a 30 story building right across the street. Now it's getting serious...We're witnessing widespread devastion, and possibly amongst only the few survivors.

Then sure enough, a third one starts looming on the horizon, and it's even bigger still. Now it's our turn, and nothing to do but watch it, and wait to die. It crashed through all 49 stories of our building, leaving only our top floor unscathed. Even though we were dry, the building was shaking so violently it felt like it was going to come down, and I thought about the towers on 9/11.

Well it didn't come down, and at this point I figured it was time to make a run for it. Through the flukes of dreams I was able to get down to the street, but while trying to figure out what to do or where to go, the fourth wave was coming. There was nothing to do, too late. It was like watching a mountain coming in.

[Joseph McAree]

I have had one or two tsunami dreams all with me standing on a hill able to see the tsunami coming in. I was surprised to find myself accepting the inevitable and just standing there. This was not a nightmare as I very rarely have a nightmare type dreams but seem to be me working on the hill at a farm tending crops with a good view of a primitive village being wiped away like a past life experience. Weird for sure as it felt like an experience rather than a dream

Kindest Regards
Joe
A nation's culture resides in the hearts and in the soul of its people.
Ghandi

[sirayah]

Hi Joe,
I have experienced these types of witnessing dreams before as well...around water, hurricanes, tsunamis and they do feel different, as if you are actually witnessing the particular event. I feel this is associated to physical grid work in the form of balancing the energies just by being present at this particular instance, as well when we see others we can be assisting process as well. Some times I check to see if some form of event actually just happened in waking reality but I do not get attached to this a a form of validating my experience as all is real for me.
Thank you for sharing! S

Posted by Titanium (here)
I have had one or two tsunami dreams all with me standing on a hill able to see the tsunami coming in. I was surprised to find myself accepting the inevitable and just standing there. This was not a nightmare as I very rarely have a nightmare type dreams but seem to be me working on the hill at a farm tending crops with a good view of a primitive village being wiped away like a past life experience. Weird for sure as it felt like an experience rather than a dream

Kindest Regards
Joe
A nation's culture resides in the hearts and in the soul of its people.
Ghandi

[sirayah]

Posted by CurtisW (here)

And I like your point about energy being waves and the connection to energies and geographical locations. This is a fascinating subject that I know you have special insight into.

You mentioned changes in energy accompanying changes in locale--and your upcoming move.

I have changed locations recently, too. I've moved here to Scotland from the Northeastern US.

Hi Curtis Interesting re the geo locals now how to you find or describe the energies of the two different locals? I am starting to tune into this "mapping" as an ongoing project of mapping the being If we get more info coming in we could open a new thread. I have been working specifically with the energies of NYC and Montreal as a hubs of sorts.
Some times we can reside on the boundary of a hub to affect the area yet not be too directly emeshed in the clearing process.....

I just had an insight regarding where the manifestation of visions and dreams. From my experience if I just drop into a vision/dream and see quickly something occur..this will manifest in my daily reality within a short time frame....I feel the frequency inwhich you are connecting into via dream/vision state is relative to the time/space experience...of course there are frequency variants but with insight and attention one can start to tune into their particlar frequency set for guidance and afformation regarding the actualization process.
For example a few months ago I feel asleep into a nap... at the time I was not sure that I would be relocating to the states. In the vision/dream I saw the american colours and felt myself leave my current circumstances and drop into the USA...about 2.5 months later this occured....
so paying attention is key...S

[Freed Fox]

I had a very strange dream last night. Apologizing ahead of time for the wall of text here...

In it, I had stumbled upon a whistle-blower document of sorts on the internet that seemed very important. The man who disclosed it even posted his full name at the end, which I suppose was a risk he was taking to help convince people that his information was the genuine article. His surname was something like "Bashir", and his first name started with either an A or M.

The document detailed a hugely significant occult ritual that was being conducting right in the public eye, without anyone realizing it. It regarded a movie that Hollywood was producing. I'm fairly certain the movie was titled "Mr. Bell".

The plot of the movie involved a group of ordinary-looking women who seemed to be some kind of coven or something. They used what appeared to be Tarot cards in rituals, which eventually lead to a figure on one of the cards to be brought to life and manifest in our reality.

The controversial aspect, and the primary focus of the document, was regarding an apparent accident which had occurred on the set, killing 50 people. This was played off as a terrible mishap in the news, but as the document revealed it was actually part of a blood sacrifice. This was a ritual to bring about the one true Anti-Christ. The document went on to list a large number of correlations to be found within the movie; references to 666 and the Anti-Christ himself.

Now, when going over this document, I was at my uncle's home. I was showing all of this to him as well, but he didn't seem to be understanding the implications therein. I suddenly became very uneasy and left to find my father and siblings, whom I believed to be at my father's house.

Outside, what seemed to be very thick and low-hanging clouds filled the air, except they had an unusual coloring. Instead of the dark blue, grey, or black color you might expect from such formations, they had a reddish-brown hue, which suggested to me that it was actually smoke covering every inch of the horizon. I made my way across town (this was all happening at night), and in the distance, in several directions, I could see the flashing red and blue lights of what must have been police vehicles. They each appeared to be far from my position, but were essentially surrounding the town.

I reached my father's home and found it empty. All the lights were off, and I hadn't a clue as to where my family had gone. I tried to call my sister, but was unable to get through to her. I became very physically ill; sick to my stomach. I was disturbed not just by their absence, but the fact that they had left no note nor made any effort to contact me.



That was it, basically. However, as soon as I woke up, I experienced something that is very rare for me. There was something there, hanging a few feet away in front of my window, in my field of vision. See, my vision isn't great to begin with (particularly my night vision), so I was unable to make it out clearly. It was either someone's hand or a spider. At first, there was a soft orange glow coming from it. Soon, that glow faded, followed by the object itself after about a minute. I didn't sit up or anything, as I wanted to study it and not 'scare it off', as I immediately thought of the astral spider phenomenon discussed in a few other threads around here. Still, I'm not sure if it was a spider or a hand. The way it faded - sort of swirling into itself and out of sight - was convincing to me, that it was not a figment of my imagination.

One thing that was truly strange about it all, was that it left me with a deep sense of dread. Although dark and ominous, there was nothing in the dream that struck me as altogether frightening, and yet as I laid there in my bed reflecting upon it, I was inexplicably frightened. Note: I do not consider myself easily frightened, and this was not the same sort of fear that nightmares tend to produce.

Some things that occurred to me as I recorded this dream, just a few points of speculation on my part;

-The film title 'Mr. Bell'; strange that bells are often used to signify the start of something, or the entrance of someone. Consider when you walk into a convenience store or barber shop or what-have-you, and the bell rings, or a bell is used to summon a clerk. This movie was apparently a cover for a summoning ritual, to bring about the Anti-Christ. 'Bell' also rhymes with 'hell'.

-It struck me that the police around town could have been evacuating or detaining people, including my family. That may have explained their absence...

-The clouds or smoke were of indeterminable origin, and some kind of natural disaster may have been occurring in the area. Could this have also been a telltale sign of the Anti-Christ's arrival?

-The sickness I felt did not seem to be the result of stress or fear, but it did seem unnatural. Almost as if I was being effected energetically...


Anyway, that's it... Thanks for humoring me. I'd love to hear some thoughts on this. It isn't often that a dream impacts me long after I've woken up from it.

[Mark]

Sounds like a good, strong, precognitive dream. The clarity of the dream and the supernatural aspect lend credence to the idea of it being more than just an exploration of your subconscious regarding the issues of your day or life in general.

Many of the elements of the dream speak to a number of concurrent methods that the elite use to disseminate information, the internet, the movies, the underlying theme of conspiracy and blood sacrifice lead to the evacuation and strange skies, connecting them, as if the sacrifice was a direct cause of the conditions the world seems to have come to at the latter point of your dream.

The fact that you woke and saw a liquid spider could signify some form of dream manipulation by whoever controls those entities, I am not certain, yes, we have talked about them elsewhere but have come to no firm conclusions regarding their origins. Or, perhaps, its presence was to make you forget the dream, which others have said as well, as they seem to act as a form of cloaking device in some instances according to other discussions, where they speed up the forgetting mechanism upon awakening. Most of us see them right before sleep or right when we awaken and it seems that is always accidental, as they scurry away once they realize that our thoughts have concentrated upon them.

Thank you for sharing, it was indeed an interesting and potentially important dream.

[Curt]

I shared this dream elsewhere, but wanted to share it here as well, since this is a great spot here on Avalon to record dream experiences.


About two months ago I had a very vivid, lucid dream. I was sitting with an open book with blank pages.

As I began looking at the first blank page it began to fill up with an elegant red script.

The words only appeared as I read them-- as though the book were being written as I read it.

I do not remember the content of the text- as when I woke up it quickly faded.

But I recall that in the dream, I had the feeling that my greatest curiosities were being quenched--and that I was receiving soul-changing information.

In the dream it meant a great deal to me--it was a kind of ecstatic feeling.

But, I began to feel this document was, in part, a contract.

The further I got into it, it became clear that I would have to agree to it--not by physically signing, but by consciously, without words or actions assenting.

And I would then be bound by something.

I balked as it became clear to me I could not consent. I knew I couldn't do it.

The writing stopped.

I felt in the presence of something incredibly powerful-- and the name Lucifer came into my consciousness.

I then partially woke up.

Half-awake, lying in bed face down I felt a massive energy--a radiating, palpable heat hovering above me.

Two immense nostrils like those from a horse, or some large beast, breathed into the back of my head.

I was now fully awake.

The hair on the back of my head moved as this thing breathed on me for what seemed like a full minute.

I could feel the heaviness of the heat, as it passed over me and disappeared.

When it was over, I hadn't felt in danger. Or terrified. And I hadn't been harmed.

And now, even though I can't remember the content of the 'book' I remember feeling like I had been offered something, asked to do something, to assent or consent to something.

I felt no anger or animosity from this presence that I hadn't read further--that I hadn't consented.

'It' seemed only to want to leave me with the knowledge that there was something profound available and that it had been offered to me.

[sirayah]

Hi Curtis,
Just popped in here...wow...
It is November now and I am sure all the gates into hell are now closed.
I say this as I experienced two demonic dreams lately as well....
I completely understand this feeling of knowing the presence is in the room as the vibrations are so intense...
When I read your dream I felt the energy was going to your Akashic records...your being is powerful and wise to alert you to
the impending infraction...so glad you where able to revoke the process mid stream.
I feel during this last phase of closing out old world realties the demonic range really made an attempt to grab on to
ppl...

My dream...I was in an apartment building on the second or third floor...next thing i see is this demon raise up from the ground and appear at the window...
then it streams in....omg....all i could do to rid the thing was to use my breath and consciously invoke enternal life at the thing...omg...finally it departed...
dropped back to street level and disappeared into the crowd....

Another more recent dream my self and a friend entered the bodies of priests and we where in an under world chamber where the child of my friend was about to become
initiated into the realms....omg...so my friend and I halted this process...and then hell came after us as we back ran the gates out....i had to seal seal seal behind me...
it was very visceral and the vibration lasted for a few days in my field....like a coldness....ewwww

ok, thanks for writing...and be well xoS