Posted by Paula
(here)
I’ve returned from a hellish, yet fruitful experience. I asked myself why I became defensive when people said that New Agers only hinder the process to move from hive-mind to co-creators. In the 1970-80’s I read all the Carlos Castaneda books and the Seth material, so the language wasn’t brand new.
Well, over the last week or so, I took on more than I expected. Though, I’m glad I did. I read about 2/3 of the books below and connected some big dots in my personal life. I’m the first to say, there’s a fine line between knowledge and programming something into existence. But I’m here to experience life. Uncover it’s depths. Toss what’s false and unproductive.
I wasn’t aware that my body was coming up on “death-of-another-kind” because so many ah-ha’s flooded my consciousness. I had two bouts of pain over the last three days. I still feel like I was hit by a mack truck and have non-stop ringing in my ears.
One of those days I spent nine hours in bed lying on pillows because the mattress was to hard. I went from waves of pain, too avoiding pain with Light, which didn’t help because I understood on some level it was my job to be in this experience alone. Then I bravely entered the center of excruciating pain which was mostly in my heart region. When that did no good, I waited to die. I welcomed it. I must have dozed off.
Then for no known reason, I began to pull and cut cords of negativity while flashes of understanding poured forth. And on three separate occasions, I pulled darkness from my heart area to the point where I vomited. (Which I don’t do often.) I believe it wasn’t my imagination. Wolfie is still effected. He won’t eat and he shakes and doesn’t want to lay down. He sits in his bed until I try to make him lay down to sleep.
This is only a SMALL part of what I learned from the books below:
People that are inclined to have negative forces enter their lives from another or into oneself are those that follow the awaken path, caregivers, teachers, sensitive-types. They may have come from homes where there’s been abuse emotional, sexual and/or physically, and/or alcoholic parent(s) where boundaries are mutable. Some solutions are boundaries, and acknowledge awareness of red flags in the gut, to know it’s okay not to try to fix another.
The one section that caught my attention was that some synchronistic meetings are by negative design. In my case, I met my future father-in-law by a fluke. He happened to walk into the office and was asked to give me a ride to an interview. A month later, I’m invited to dinner by my new boyfriend. It was the same person from the office. Future father-in-law told his son this is the young lady I was talking about that I had wished you’d meet. Fast forward years, my new partner finds a place to live. Unaware, it’s the same place my first husband lived in. So some fifteen years later, my son shared the same bedroom as his dad.
I’ve written before where I filled my VW with whatever I could and bolted. What I didn’t write was because weeks earlier, my in-laws took my son and said he was on vacation at their aunt's place. I couldn’t get him back until I made the marriage work.
Hubby was heavy in Eckankar, only wanted to listen to Moody Blues until late into the night and drink. I didn’t know who he was. No matter how clean the house was, or how elaborate a meal I cooked, or how many times I cut the lawn, wall papered, stripped the varnish and stained cupboards in our new home, none of it was good enough. This one evening a few days after I got my son back, hubby came up the stairs with a guttural yell for no reason but to say he was home. His eyes were scary. His face was ugly. As soon as he left for work the next day, I filled the VW and bolted. It was a year later that I did have a chance to ask what happened because nothing big really went wrong in those five years together. He did say that he didn’t know what came over him.
Reading this material was a positive experience. Though, I’ll hold off for a couple of days or weeks to go back to it. I have a renew sense of how to dialogue with borderline psychopaths or one’s that are unaware that they are shrouded in dark energy. I no longer accept blame for an exchange that quickly goes awry from family members. It’s a relief to know why behaviors have escalated from them as if I’m living in a dark, slow motion movie. And most importantly, the more Light one opens to, one may encounter these darker energies.
My conclusions for now: in my world there is Love and Light, but it’s not the New Agey kind. They, the loved ones and the ones I’m yet to meet, just haven’t crossed over to this new dimension. It’s just that simple. AND be kind and rewind is no longer my solution for dark behaviors nor psychopaths.
These are the books I mentioned:
- “The Dark Side of Cupid: Love Affairs, the Supernatural, and Energy Vampirism 2012,” By: Eve Lorgen
- “2000 The Love Bite: Alien Interference in Human Love Relationships,“ By: Eve Lorgen
- “How to Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved,” By: Sandra L. Brown
Also read free pdf of Karla Turner, Ph.D. I had seen her full lecture about a year ago. Back then it was too much to take in. Though I did set aside fear long enough to take it in on one level.
I’ve downloaded these but a little gun shy to continue for now:
- “Bringers of the Dawn,” by: Barbara Marciniak
- “In Search of the Miraculous,” by: P.D. Ouspensky
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