Here and Now...What's Happening?

[eaglespirit]

BE The Creator!

[Michelle Marie]

Posted by Paula (here)

Posted by Michelle Marie (here)
I don't know exactly WTF is happening, but it has been INTENSE for me since fall. I'm happy spring is here because I'm so ready to resurrect my Spirit!

The Universe partners with those that tap into their inner treasures.

I LOVE this! It's so true.

I'm experiencing magical experiences, super-auspicious days, and incredible unions with new people/old souls.
It really is unfolding now.

For example, when my car broke down, I rode to the middle school with a neighbor and watched his kids. While I was there I met 3 teachers (I used to teach middle school, so it felt like a familiar setting). One of them has also started a non-profit and has developed programs for teen leadership. He heard about my current crisis and he handed me $100 bill.

Best of all, as soon as I do get a working car, I'm going to meet with him and give him two of my children's books, Clothing of the Soul and the Value of Love. He will use them in his office with the kids. The counselor at the high school that I used to work at did the same thing. See, the Value of Love is about the difference in value systems and when people judge you by your financial status they don't understand that it's not about the money, it's about the feeling. Kids get their feelings hurt when other kids make fun of them for not having the "best" or "coolest" clothes and stuff. AND I realized, Hey! Here is one market/audience to target when marketing my book: school counselors.

YeeHaw!!! I was working beneath the surface for 12 years on my own work while teaching school. Now it's time to just get my own stuff out there.

Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. I love you.

Michelle Marie

[astrid]

Sleep where art thou
I'm exhausted I would have expected to have
passed out already
3.52 am and brain is still at it

Shut up already

[Calz]

[Flash]

A new definition I found (in fact probably old, but new for me) on the FDA: Fraud and Death Administration

Michelle Marie, excellent idea, the school counselors, really good. Do you sell your books? Is there a program going with it?

Thanks for your simple words Eagle Spirit, be the Creator!

Carmody, your idea is REALLY GREAT. I would personnally enjoy quite a lot such a thing.

As for my last posts:

I am slowly recuperating my body and emotions. With my daughter's words, and energies sent at me, I was really physically hit on the heart chakra, it is still painful.

It gave us the occasion to discuss a bit, me telling her how I received it, her telling me what she felt. Of course, I am entirely to blame for missing or misplacing appointments etc. (in her mind) but nevertheless, it allowed me to see. We also discussed about her general "malaise" ill ease within herself, and me about mine. How deep the ill ease or heart hurts / energies huts are within her. In fact, very pervasive. It allowed me to see the amplitude of the problem and how hugely impacted she has been by her destructive dad. And how hugely impacted I had been too. He is quite dark, more than I wanted to admit.

I think I am truly mixed up not to say "fu c k ed up". I do have to work on myself and I do not know if there is great potential in view of my age and the disaster I found in me more acute than thought of. I am also paranoid, I trust very little. Which makes me "controlling or directive" at times when I should let the others and life come - a comment of my supervisor in the master degree I am doing. It also applies to my fright of loosing my daughter.

Well, those are self thinking loud in fact, no need to share, but once written, I will leave it like this. I have to start to trust somewhere...

Thank you all for the support, I was in real crisis, a kind of melt down.

Flash

[Carmody]

Melt downs can be good. They just don't 'feel' that way.

[Chester]

Posted by Flash (here)
A new definition I found (in fact probably old, but new for me) on the FDA: Fraud and Death Administration

Michelle Marie, excellent idea, the school counselors, really good. Do you sell your books? Is there a program going with it?

Thanks for your simple words Eagle Spirit, be the Creator!

Carmody, your idea is REALLY GREAT. I would personnally enjoy quite a lot such a thing.

As for my last posts:

I am slowly recuperating my body and emotions. With my daughter's words, and energies sent at me, I was really physically hit on the heart chakra, it is still painful.

It gave us the occasion to discuss a bit, me telling her how I received it, her telling me what she felt. Of course, I am entirely to blame for missing or misplacing appointments etc. (in her mind) but nevertheless, it allowed me to see. We also discussed about her general "malaise" ill ease within herself, and me about mine. How deep the ill ease or heart hurts / energies huts are within her. In fact, very pervasive. It allowed me to see the amplitude of the problem and how hugely impacted she has been by her destructive dad. And how hugely impacted I had been too. He is quite dark, more than I wanted to admit.

I think I am truly mixed up not to say "fu c k ed up". I do have to work on myself and I do not know if there is great potential in view of my age and the disaster I found in me more acute than thought of. I am also paranoid, I trust very little. Which makes me "controlling or directive" at times when I should let the others and life come - a comment of my supervisor in the master degree I am doing. It also applies to my fright of loosing my daughter.

Well, those are self thinking loud in fact, no need to share, but once written, I will leave it like this. I have to start to trust somewhere...

Thank you all for the support, I was in real crisis, a kind of melt down.

Flash

You got into a twisted place, yes... but on a scale of 1 to 10 as to people I have come to know through Avalon - 10 being "Well Adjusted" and 1 being ephed up... the person I have come to know is close to that 10.

We all have our hard times but few go through it and do so honestly and do so publicly.

I see that as healthy! Not ephed up.

Take Care
Chester

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Flash (here)
It also applies to my fright of loosing my daughter.

Hi Flash,
I may have read it wrong. This sentence implies now. So that's what this response is about.

For what it's worth when I read that sentence this popped in. The fear of loss is a past timeline. Where you feared loosing Daughter in those thirty hours of labor + C section birth. Could it be there are energetics stuck in places that manifest as fear of future loss? Just FFT. (food for thought)

I do understand the fear that every parent feels about loosing their child. This, in part, may be a healing opportunity for old trauma that's coming to the surface to be released.

L,
Paula

If it's the case then please accept this gift. Don't forget to attach a 'let-it-go' note. And no birds, blimps, planes, nor Off World Families are effected by them.

[Flash]

Paula thanks for the balloon bouquet to be sent away.

Yes, you are right, it could relate to a very difficult delivery and also a pregnancy at risk all along, from the start, from the few first days. And a very desired child from my side. I am an older mom you see. And yes, this fright I had was quite physical at the time.

It also has to do, I think, with a terrible divorce where the fight to keep her with me was a 4 years fight, with lawyers, medical experts (me for her aphasia, him to convince them I was a lost case and should not have my daughter etc), judicial shrinks (him on me), name it.

I knew that if she was with him, without me, she was finished. She would have been a human puree, mashed and smashed. She could never have grown with him. A sensitive soul dies with someone like this.

And a story he took a whole summer to build up -and he is bright - so that I would not be believed wherever I go, including my own lawyer at first. My very reputed lawyer told me it was one of the worst divorce she had seen. And she did not know half of what was going on.

I do feel that my own mission, over and above being a mom, is to protect her at any cost. She would not be my daughter and yet, it would be my mission. She chose a skilled mom in order to be fine, despite anything thrown at her.

So when new elements enters her life, and make the pain and hatred she cumulated in her youth - thanks mainly to her dad - comes to the surface, and have it directed at me, wow, this was unexpected. The fear of loosing her is also the fear of her loosing herself as well. But now I see it, this is the advantage.

I now know she will have to deal heavily with her demons, at a young age. I hope she will have the strenght and that I will be there to back her up when possible and know when to distance myself as well.

In the meantime, I will try to clean my own demons, the fright of loosing her being one of them (there is a difference between protecting and fright of loosing, the former being quite objective, the latter being neurotic). This is what I saw in the last 4 days.

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Flash (here)
"...I hope she will have the strength and that I will be there to back her up when possible and know when to distance myself as well..."

"...In the meantime, I will try to clean my own demons...

Hi Flash,

When you find the answer to the balance of being there and allowance for Daughter to walk the path that she designed before she touched down here, let me know. We'll bottle it. Then travel and spray it's secrets to anyone that wishes to close the door to karma of old.

L,
Paula

PS I've found that whenever great emotion is triggered, old stuff comes up for either release or to relive. They aren't demons. Just human's attached to the gunk that infiltrates when one isn't looking. I spit it out like tasteless ABC gum. (Already Been Chewed) Cuz, that's what it is for me. (Hope this isn't bordering on lecture. It really is my belief. I'd add, sometimes I forget.)

[Flash]

no you are not bothering me at all, you are making me smile Paula

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Flash (here)
no you are not bothering me at all, you are making me smile Paula

And You made me tear. (happy ones)

[aniN]

I have a days of Malachi I guess . Interesting stuff. This one is: Art Bell- With Malachi Martin -Vatican Murders (4-2-99) .

Well I could put it in to a Vatican (ET) thread, or HK thread or NWO thread or Soul and Spirit thread or..... I decided to put it here because of the various themes that they talk about just in one ( of many - see Utube ) interviews.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=jm38uzpbY3k

[eaglespirit]

Dream A New Dream , Flash
BE The New Dream : )
...put it all behind You and Create ...Anything!!!

[eaglespirit]

I know I have been sharing this for quite some time...but it is ALL coming undone Villagers, in real time!

The lies and the theft that have entrapped all peoples and the ripping-out-of-hearts of cultures is being uncovered 'en-masse' now...and the solutions and ways and means to live as free beings on Mother Earth are going to become more evident every new day and the interference and control of the perpetrators of the old system will decrease in acceleration now. We are going to help each other more than ever through this sovereignty awakening period and become one living-loving family on Pachumama...I Love You All...Create Your New World : )

[RunningDeer]

[ulli]

It's 9:11 PM here...home alone with our three cats. Hubbie went to visit his parents who are in their mountain finca for Easter.
So I was surfing Facebook pages, and ended up on Julian Lennon's page only to discover that his stepfather had just died, someone I had known quite well in the seventies in Barbados...where he owned a nightclub. RIP Noel Charles.
Julian's mother Cynthia and Noel were married in 2002 and lived in Spain, where he died this month.

[Dennis Leahy]

Posted by Paula (here)

I see your hug, and raise you a hug.

:~)

Dennis

[astrid]

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=xDuweaUlAyE

[donk]

Melt downs can be good. They just don't 'feel' that way.

Maybe that's what I need....a solid meltdown...heh

Here and now I wonder why anyone would want to deceive, how delusion and denial come so easily to us.

Reality is interesting enough without making s*** up

Ah well, guess it's for the best I ain't got the time or resources for a proper meltdown. I'll have to settle for the mini-meltdowns I was programmed for, and keep trying to get better