Women using their voices

[Natalia]

Women's voices making a loving difference

http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2012/06...actually-mean/

I will probably delete this next bit so please don't quote me on it:

(...deleted...)

A woman's cry isn't always heard, if she doesn't use her voice...
Men don't always know the right thing to do, if a she doesn't use her voice...
Women cry collectively in the whole world, and there are reasons...
She needs to be heard and supported...
of course not by all but by enough and herself, even if at first she gets help to then help herself...
Women can make a loving difference, using their voices (it's not all they use)...

God, I am really crying my eyes out, something really triggered this this morning (and I have pmt, lol).

[river]

Posted by Amethyst (here)
Women's voices making a loving difference

http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2012/06...actually-mean/

I will probably delete this next bit so please don't quote me on it:

When I was a young child, my father was so very strict, that he would not allow me to talk or look at him or move around (or laugh), unless I had his permission, if I made some noise I was punished by him hitting me and locking me up in my room...I am in a lot tears now because of this memory and this thing in the world that sais a woman should not use her voice...and when some men see it as not beautiful...

A woman's cry isn't always heard, if she doesn't use her voice...
Men don't always know the right thing to do, if a she doesn't use her voice...
Women cry collectively in the whole world, and there are reasons...
She needs to be heard and supported...
of course not by all but by enough and herself, even if at first she gets help to then help herself...
Women can make a loving difference, using their voices (it's not all they use)...

God, I am really crying my eyes out, something really triggered this this morning (and I have pmt, lol).

When , men understand , that women are important , only then will society evolve

Not to be controlled so much by women , but to respect their thoughts

[giovonni]

Glad you got that out. i feel better for it and i hope you do as well.

That took a lot of courage.

[Natalia]

Posted by river (here)

Posted by Amethyst (here)
Women's voices making a loving difference

http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2012/06...actually-mean/

I will probably delete this next bit so please don't quote me on it:
(deleted from this quote)

A woman's cry isn't always heard, if she doesn't use her voice...
Men don't always know the right thing to do, if a she doesn't use her voice...
Women cry collectively in the whole world, and there are reasons...
She needs to be heard and supported...
of course not by all but by enough and herself, even if at first she gets help to then help herself...
Women can make a loving difference, using their voices (it's not all they use)...

God, I am really crying my eyes out, something really triggered this this morning (and I have pmt, lol).

When , men understand , that women are important , only then will society evolve

Not to be controlled so much by women , but to respect their thoughts

Yeah, and I don't want to control (or compete with) men (that's not in my nature), and am not even the manager or leader type in a job, let alone a relationship...I am the assistant/supportive type who sometimes has ideas and sometimes uses her voice...and to me the most important thing for me is to be is loving and nurturing

There are some men like this, who support women and see their value on deeper levels...I agree with the bit in the article that sais that we need to work together...

[Natalia]

Posted by giovonni (here)
Glad you got that out. i feel better for it and i hope you do as well.

That took a lot of courage.

Thank you

[Natalia]

If a man doesn't support a woman having a voice - it's not love

Edit (this is part of an emotional process for me, as I go along)

It means something to me when a man (and woman) wants to listen, to hear...

[Omni]

Be well Amethyst. You are a very beautiful person. Adversities can help build character as long as they are dealt with in a healthy manner. And sometimes a good cry feels good.

Posted by river (here)

Posted by Amethyst (here)
Women's voices making a loving difference

http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2012/06...actually-mean/

I will probably delete this next bit so please don't quote me on it:.....

When , men understand , that women are important , only then will society evolve

Not to be controlled so much by women , but to respect their thoughts

Did you read her post? She asked for others to not quote her..

[Natalia]

Posted by Omniverse (here)
Be well Amethyst. You are a very beautiful person. Adversities can help build character as long as they are dealt with in a healthy manner. And sometimes a good cry feels good.

Thank you Omni, glad I met you <3

[ghostrider]

women will rule again one day , notice you have to take something away from woman to get man ...

[Rich]

Posted by river (here)
When , men understand , that women are important , only then will society evolve

Or when women understand it.

Btw, she asked not to be quoted.

[chocolate]

Greetings Amethyst,

Good to hear your voice!



Sometimes what happens in the past needs to stay in the past, for good reason ( you know, the brain has a bit of a hard time distinguishing between what is real and what is in your imagination, and so does in this way your physical body ), but most importantly the two sides of the story need to come to an understanding of the problem that created the situation. I am sure your dad probably had his own reasons for acting the way he had done. And, please, don't misunderstand here, I am not defending him. In my own life I experienced a similar situation, and probably that only had to teach me something about myself and the nature of the human person.
In fact, I had hard time coming from both of my parents. I only had the benefit of an intuitive knowing to quickly see through their own pain and problems. I have forgiven them both from my side, and love them very much (both are still alive). But it wasn't easy, and I have some scars ( in my soul mostly ) to remind me of the past. The part that really helped me was when I had to defend (or fight for) my sister, 8 years younger. That is when I realized that the problem is not in the children, mostly, but in the grown-ups.

I hope you will find your closure to be able to move forward.

The fact that some of us ( men and women ) have been risen with clipped wings doesn't mean we can't grow some new ones, on a different level even.

Having a voice is something that is part of each of us, and it is up to us to use it or not. It takes a mature and strong individual to master the skill of using his/hers voice properly, so that it is heard correctly. I for one can't stand people shouting ( I have heard way too much shouting in my childhood ). I also can't stand people just remaining silent when they need to speak up. But sometimes it takes time for each of us to learn how to voice one's needs, thoughts, to share moments and to lay a comfortable ground for a mutual communication / understanding.

I have witnessed the situation of a man being/becoming voice-less (for the same reasons as what you have described, and for other reasons, too), so I try to speak for both genders. We are all pretty much the same souls inside, just the outer appearance is of a 'polarized' individual.

In today's world we have grown accustomed to women shouting/crying/using different tactics in a society where women have been suppressed ( I am not a feminist ), and to men being tear-less, which is also something we need to overcome.
(My defenses usually drop when I see a man crying. It just totally shakes me, especially around men who are strong individuals.)

I hope we all will learn to use our voices (or tears) when necessary.
It is a human 'thing'.

But most of the time when tears come out it is for a physiological/psychological reason. I have cried way too much to know that feeling from the inside.

Here one can go into so many different aspects of suppressed emotional life, and world out of balance, that I need to stop now before I overtake the thread.

Stay well, and I hope with time every wound will heal properly and you will be able to move forward, which also will include to voice your opinion without fear of judgement.



BTW, I have a friend, a man who is a few years younger, and who recently married and has a baby. He is a photographer/professional painter, but he had trouble speaking. Whenever he was feeling emotionally triggered (I need another word here, but that came to mind), he couldn't speak ( he would start to stutter, and as a result he would become silent).
With time his confidence grew, and now nobody could say he has problem speaking. Only some of his old-time friends would know that.
He also is careful with his words, he speaks more slowly and would say with a few words a lot of content! And he is a very, very sweet soul.

[Mike Gorman]

I commend your thoughts, and I think it is always a mark of the level of civilization and development when women are respected as
fellow human beings, with different approaches, perspectives and gifts than men - it has been way too long in coming all over the world that women
are afforded the complete and unconditional acceptance by men as comrades and partners. It is only when the male and female psyche is linked
harmoniously that our world can be said to be whole - there will come a time when this ridiculous schism between the sexes is erased -when we finally do begin to
extend true respect towards the other, this alone will represent a huge step forward for the human race.

[Violet]

There are women that are ruining everything for women like you. Just like there are men ruining everything for sincere men. How many women nowadays believe in the sheer existence of a sincere man? Likewise, why is it that a lot of men see women as double-faced, ready to lure them into whatever it is they're afraid to be lured into.

Why should everyone be punished for what the fools decide to do?

I send you so much love and healing Amethyst.

¤=[Post Update]=¤

@Chocolate: i-i for forgiveness.

[Stephanie]

Dear and lovely Amethyst,
Thoughts that might help our understanding...
Female and male energies are inherently never separate and are interwoven within each of us,while imbalance is created in ourselves and our lives through misuse and denial of the female/male part of ourselves,thus creating a reciprocal effect on its opposites' expression.
By balancing,healing and integrating the feminine/masculine energies,and going beyond the duality of conflict,we honour ourselves,each other and our global community.
Honouring all you are,

[Natalia]

Thank you all for your replies, will be back later to reply more.

[Joe Sustaire]

I'm glad your speaking up Amethyst and so sorry you had to endure such an upbringing. As one blessed enough to have had 43 years of sharing with my soulmate, Patty, I can tell you it doesn't get any better than having two loving voices sharing thoughts, love, and decisions! She is in a nursing home now, alzheimers, and going it alone without her voice is extremely difficult....

I hope you can find people that will love the hearing of "your" voice! This seems like a good place to start.

[Orph]

Posted by ghostrider (here)
women will rule again one day , ...

We don't need anyone "ruling" anybody, be it man or women. We need cooperation.

[Orph]

Posted by Amethyst (here)

Yeah, and I don't want to control (or compete with) men (that's not in my nature), and am not even the manager or leader type in a job, let alone a relationship...I am the assistant/supportive type who sometimes has ideas and sometimes uses her voice...and to me the most important thing for me is to be is loving and nurturing

This ^^^^ Cooperation, not control. Loving and nurturing, instead of domineering. (And women can be just as domineering as men in some cases, when they take on the supposed "role of a man"). It's about all people being loving and nurturing, regardless of gender.

Just keep being yourself Amethyst, and hopefully the world will someday catch up with you.

[ulli]

The most important thing is to educate the girls.
If necessary, give girls priority over boys, as girls will be the future mothers,
and as such they will be the first educators of the next generation.

Already in the 19th century this was religious "dogma" in the early Baha'i communities of Persia
and for propagating such a revolutionary teaching over 20,000 of the early Bahai's were tortured and killed by the Muslim population.

Yet those who managed to come to the West became active in the suffragette movement and helped get American women their voting rights. European countries followed during the twentieth century.

But still, without a decent education women will vote for leaders who are deceitful,
as they lack the scholarly ability to inform themselves and investigate politicians.

So in reality giving women their voting rights could seem counter-productive.
This is why education must come first.

"As long as women are prevented from attaining their highest possibility,
so long will men be unable to achieve the greatness which might be theirs". ~'Abdu'l-Bahá

[RunningDeer]

Posted by Amethyst (here)
and am not even the manager or leader type in a job, let alone a relationship...I am the assistant/supportive type who sometimes has ideas and sometimes uses her voice...and to me the most important thing for me is to be is loving and nurturing.

Hi Amethyst,

Based on the threads you’ve maintained, I see you as a ‘manager or leader type’. Actually in at least several areas:

Interpersonal Intelligence (“People Smart”)
 
“Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand and interact effectively with others.  It involves effective verbal and nonverbal communication, the ability to note distinctions among others, sensitivity to the moods and temperaments of others, and the ability to entertain multiple perspectives.  Teachers, social workers, actors, and politicians all exhibit interpersonal intelligence.  Young adults with this kind of intelligence are leaders among their peers, are good at communicating, and seem to understand others’ feelings and motives.”

Intra-personal Intelligence (“Self Smart”)
 
Intra-personal intelligence is the capacity to understand oneself and one’s thoughts and feelings, and to use such knowledge in planning and directioning one’s life.  Intra-personal intelligence involves not only an appreciation of the self, but also of the human condition.  It is evident in psychologist, spiritual leaders, and philosophers.  These young adults may be shy.  They are very aware of their own feelings and are self-motivated.

You also exhibit a sensitivity and intelligence as described in “Emotional Intelligence,” by: Daniel Goleman. Another favorite resource is “7 Kinds of Smart,” by: Thomas Armstrong.

The quotes above came from, Howard Gardner, “The Nine Types of Intelligence".

RunningDeer <3