An important announcement following the closure of the WORM TONGUE thread

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by slvrfx (here)
Celine knew that if she put it out there, in the open, the comments she made about Bill not keeping his word with her, and how he's a different person in the public then he is in private, and how the mods have been putting up with a lot behind the scenes, that she was opening herself up to criticism and ridicule, but also calling upon herself the wrath of Bill. And yet she forged ahead.

Richard, the man who always represented to me the epitome of calmness, loses his professionalism with the one thing that I, frankly, was shocked to see him do, and with very little provocation...he cursed and banished a member who was provoking his wife.

And Bill...usually cool, calm, and collected, the master of balance, keeping the peace, giving all but the most hardened violators the boot...he, banishes Richard who has volunteered way beyond what any normal person would do, giving his best to running Avalon in a professional way, for how many years?

I don't know about anybody else, but this just doesn't make any sense to me, and that's why I couldn't even figure out how I felt about this.

Confused to say the least.

Please let me de-confuse you - and a number of others. A few of you understand what has happened. Many (include some of the ex-mods) do not.

Take deep breath and read all of what follows. Then you will understand.

--------

Dear Friends:

Some questions need to be answered, and I'll answer them as best as I can. I'm quite tired (I have not slept last night at all) but I'll give it my best right here.

1) The moderators have been under considerable pressure because of (a) a massive influx of new members, and (b) an understandable anxiety that control over the forum was somehow being lost and that there was some kind of danger.

There was no firm consensus about how to handle this. I made all the calls in that situation.

2) Meanwhile, a number of new mods came on board to enlarge the team. These were all very fine people but some had far less experience than (e.g.) Ross, the oldest hand at 2.5 years.

3) There were several (maybe 4 or 5) instances where I overruled a fairly major moderator decision. One of those was when Richard banned Gypsy Woman (GW) for 30 days. I changed that to 7 days and then banned Spirit Wolf for 7 days as well. Richard told me yesterday that he agreed with that.

There was another instance when a major thread was closed (the first Charles Questions thread) when I wanted it to stay open. I was very concerned that this was managed properly and I gave Richard a lot of direction after he had closed it with (in my view) an announcement that could have been better and was not as well thought through as it could have been.

I also vetoed Charles' donations proposal after I had heard about it via Dale without having been approached or consulted. (This was not Dale's fault at all.)

4) Kerry posted a piece on her blog which upset Celine. She started an aggressive, critical thread (against Kerry, defending me) which was in a private, moderators' area to which she had access. (We do have some private areas to discuss things backchannel, as you would fully expect.)

Several other mods chipped in with posts. I noticed that a member had started another thread with much the same title, so I merged them. When a thread from a private area is merged with a thread in a public area, the default is that the merged thread is publicly visible. I did not notice this, and Celine was appalled that I had made her private comments about Kerry publicly viewable.

It was an accident, but she did not believe me. To this day, she regards it as a deliberate betrayal.

I was challenged by Richard, who was angry in defense of Celine, who is his wife. I pointed out that the fix was to move the sensitive posts to a private area immediately and leave the merged thread where it was. Richard, for some reason, would not do that. 20 mins later, I moved the posts myself. That was one of the cracks in the edifice to which Celine makes repeated reference.

5) Meanwhile, the mods were losing trust in Dale, who was accused by several (including Celine) of leaking moderator information to Charles. I know Dale, and he is a man of the highest integrity. I stood up for him and gave him my full support in a position where some mods mistakenly thought that they could vote him out. I told them that was not going to happen.

6) After one minor disagreement (with Beth, about a relatively small issue), Richard suddenly said to me that either Dale must go or he would go. I thanked him, and told him that Dale was going nowhere.

Richard went offline for two days and then returned with a proposal that he presented to the mods for 'voting'. The proposal included that I would not longer have access to the moderator control panel, through which bans are made, modified or lifted.

Richard made general references to my "diktats' and "vetoes". I told him that while the forum was experiencing challenges, I would remain at the wheel. I said I would hand over the wheel to him when the forum was operating normally, and not before. I told him that I would continue to have access to the mods control panel.

I was not unpleasant, but I made it clear that my stance was not up for discussion or vote.

7) We then established another private area for moderator chat. Celine did not want Dale involved. I insisted that no moderator should be left out. To assuage concerns about security, I asked everyone to attest in writing that they would keep all matters confidential. The intention was to provide reassurance that sensitive matters would go nowhere.

Somewhere in there, to defend Dale, I copied to the mods a Skype chat which Celine had sent to me privately saying that she did not trust Dale. Celine regarded that as another betrayal. In the meantime, Celine's error has continually been that she regards herself as a kind of quasi-moderator, which she is not and never has been. She is a member of the forum like any other.

It is this crossing of administrative lines, and the resultant intolerable stress on Richard, which has caused a great deal of the recurring problems.

8) So now we're in the new private area, and we discuss aspects of Charles' testimony which were off-record, the 'Enlightened material', and the 'Heather' material. Then Celine started a thread on Gypsy Woman which (like the Worm Tongue thread) started off badly and went downhill from there.

I was stating clearly that GW was not part of the Heather problem, which we were trying to troubleshoot. (This was another source of disagreement: Some mods wanted her banned. I wanted to let it roll.)

Celine insisted that GW was in some way implicated in a planned and conspiratorial destructive offensive of some kind against the forum, and had personally collected a large amount of private material to prove her point (e-mails, Skype tests, and PMs from many members). I was horrified, but read in detail what was presented as a kind of dossier.

I could see that Celine had clearly misinterpreted one paragraph and assigned it entirely the wrong meaning - that GW had known Heather before she arrived at Avalon. This was categorically not the case. I refused to have her demonized, as Dale had been. See below for more on my anti-witch-hunt stance.

In the dialog, Celine suggested that I had lied to the members of the forum (as she did again earlier today). That infuriated me. I pushed back strongly, and asked her to please leave the forum.

By then I had had enough. Several members have, in my opinion, correctly identified all of Celine's various characteristics. It is not my purpose here to crucify her. But there had been a growing problem inasmuch as Celine would gain the ear of many members and would report essentially private information to Richard and others. She was acting as a kind of plant in the troops' camp.

Because much of this was absolutely uncontrollable (and rightly so) - Skype, PMs, and Avalon chat - it was not my place to control that. But it was a growing problem in which Celine was talking to many people about many other people, frequently, and acting as a two-way swinging door.

Meanwhile, Charles would find out what was happening on Avalon behind the scenes simply by calling Celine, asking her, and listening carefully. It was like turning on the television to get the news.

Someone like Charles - even with no ill-intention - was obviously going to utilize that source of intelligence in whatever way he could. In his position and in his shoes, I would have done the same. The only person who had any control over Celine - Richard - was doing nothing about this.

It came to a head when I became so infuriated and irritated - at the culmination of this GW thread that Celine had started - that I wrote this personal post which I copy below.

For anyone who does not know who I am - read this. Zook, shame on you: I recommend that you read it also. You are proud to form strong opinions at the same time as admitting to having done almost no research to base those opinions on. An intellectual process that I would not recommend.

What follows is very slightly edited to preserve a couple of off-record items.

A personal statement.

I too considered resigning about an hour ago. I waved it away, because I'm sure it was intended.

But I am angry and disappointed at the fact that not one person saw (or said they saw) what was happening for what it was. You're meant to be smarter than that.

I was being maligned. Distrusted. Made the village-criminal-in-the-stocks scapegoat for a huge amount of emotional charge that had nothing to do with me.

This is a private party - a poor metaphor that we all use (mea culpa) - and if anyone does not like me, my style, my values, my principles, my stand on anything and everything, or the way I try my best to lead this team by setting an example everywhere I go, then damn you, and leave now.

Make your call and make your stand.

I am friendly, patient, tolerant, supportive, more sensitive than you will ever know, highly intelligent, gifted in a number of ways, detail-oriented, precise, creative, eternally positive. I have never lied to the membership and I have never lied to you, Celine - damn your paranoid accusations, which are crazy and which hurt.

I am almost always positive. I bust a gut to deal with everything that comes my way. Very, very, very few people could do what I do and do it well. I carry more on my shoulders than you will ever know. I have fixed and handled more than you will ever know. I have freed more beings than you will ever know. I care more about and take direct personal responsibility for more than you will ever know.

I defend underdogs. I defend people who have been attacked for no reason. It's my style. If you think what you saw here was 'ego', you know nothing about me.

I'll tell you a story. Sepia knows. it. I also told Inelia the other week. No-one else knows. I never talk about it. I'll make it brief.

At aged 24, I was a junior housemaster at Millfield School in England - Britain's most expensive private school. One of the boys - aged 13 - was being bullied. This kid, who was Iranian, summoned all his courage and went to the headmaster himself to ask for help. His appointment was at 9 am.

At 10 am he was found hanged. The headmaster denied that the kid had been to see him. I gathered evidence to show that he was lying. I confronted him personally and told him that he was covering it all up. I then went to the press - and quit. It was front page news all over England in 1977.

Many of the kids AND STAFF thanked me for making a stand. That was the first time I collided with someone at the top of a pyramid.

I vowed then that for the rest of my life I would always stand up to defend someone who was being unjustly attacked or put down. And that I would always take to task those who were the unjust persecutors. It was a vow.

Meanwhile, not one person here got in touch with me behind the scenes to say: hey, buddy, you're having a tough time there with that crazy woman who will not lie down or shut up. Just ignore it. And well done for sticking to the facts and for defending your integrity and your principles, and for having the courage to defend someone who was being unjustly accused.

Not one of you has yet done this.

Just keep on blaming me for all of Avalon's problems. Not a word about how hard I am working to create articulate, inspiring, positive posts. Not a word about how I am the reason most people are here in the first place. Not a word about the things people say on the WELCOME thread when they arrive. Just continuous criticism, carping, negativity, nitpicking, and blame.

Leave now or commit to stay. Decide right now.

I've learned to handle everything I do on my own. I am immensely self-sufficient. I am extraordinarily strong. I get hurt and rarely show it. While the donations hiatus was doing its dramatic thing three weeks ago, I was sleeping in my car in a sleeping bag in temperatures several degrees below freezing and getting moved on by the police at 3 am because I was running the engine to keep warm. I never breathed a whisper about that. Because it didn't matter. But maybe I say too little about myself sometimes.

One piece of information that Charles shared with me back in August was that I am a unique individual and have been the subject of great interest because of that (and, simultaneously, became a problem).

It's because of my bloodline. I will not go into details. King Arthur was apparently a real-life ancestor. The Camelot connection was an RE-connection that was unconscious at least as far as I was concerned. Charles' 18 is because he is wanting to recreate the Knights of the Round Table.He sees me as the Second Coming of Arthur. He's doing this in a way that is causing various kinds of chaos - but he means well. It's the walk-on-red crossing of all administrative and procedural boundaries and guidelines that has caused all the many problems.

You can all be forgiven for not following the twists and turns. These have been highly complex.

Two people pretty much understand what has happened: Sepia and Inelia. Each operating in different ways, they both have the perception to understand the big picture. I don't think anyone else has much of a clue. You are not to be blamed for that, though I tried to spell it out as clearly as i could.

But your lack of trust that I was tracking it all and knew what I was doing - even when things got tricky - was palpable.

I understand that this comes from fear. Fear of loss, fear of being out of control, fear that the guy in charge has no clue what he's doing. The guy in charge does know what he's doing, but he's human.

And that - Celine - is not a euphemism for being some kind of liar: it's a euphemism for the fact that each one of the little comments you make, and each one of the little thoughts you think, hurts. But this, right now, is the closest that you will ever see of me losing control.

My request to you all: Be bigger than you have been. Trust more than you have been. Be more positive than you have been. Inject more positive energy into the forum than you have been. If you want to analyze and criticize with an intention to fix perceived problems, be clear, specific, intelligent, and constructive.

The forum is a microcosm of the world. This will intensify. It will get more crazy as time goes on through 2011 into 2012, and as numbers increase. We will lose people. We'll lose moderators. We'll lose friends. All that is part of life and part of the learning that we're in the middle of.

Timelines are changing, and this has started. We're winning, but we have not won yet, because the process needs to continue for another couple of years. We do have the opportunity to be a model for a new world.

But the measure of a person, or an organization, is not whether one has problems. Successful people, and successful organizations, have huge problems. It's about how they are handled, what learning takes place, and whether the issues recur.

Think on all this. Maybe read it again tomorrow. If you can bear to, read it all from the start and then read this final post again.

Now I am closing this thread, which should never have been opened.

********

I received strong support from half the team, and most of the non-moderator members of that group. Two of them wrote to me to say that they were so fiercely angry at what Celine had been saying to me - and about me - that they were unable to know how to respond (and did not do so - which I understand). There was a deafening silence from Beth, Richard and Fred, which I heard clearly. I let it go. It was an interesting personal experience.

9) Now we arrive at a few nights ago. I had been offline almost all week. (Note that I have to positively log off to be seen as absent from the forum. If I put my laptop to sleep, I am still seen as online. I have not been there very often at all while at the Phoenix UFO Congress.)

I was in the middle of reading two virulent PMs from Gypsy Woman. I was trying to understand what she was saying, and was intending to reply. In the middle of that, I noticed that she had suddenly been banned.

I went on to the mods chat, and saw that Richard had banned her permanently. I unbanned her immediately. I wanted to know more what had happened and was still catching up. By this time, I did not trust Rich's decisions.

Richard was incredulous. He, Beth and Zook all left the chat immediately (the equivalent of walking out of the room or putting the phone down). My stance, which I explained, was that it might well be right to ban her, but I wanted more information first.

It has always been my belief that GW had been enraged beyond her personal limit of stability by attacks and circumstances which she felt she had little control over. She over-reacted wildly, but in my view she was never the source of the problems. They lie elsewhere.

Richard then removed my Avalon admin control panel access - which left me incredulous. It was a direct challenge. I gave Richard one hour to restore my access. He did so.

At that point, Celine started the dreadful and toxic WORM TONGUE thread. It began badly, and then got worse. Richard, then furious himself, lost all control on page 6 and simply started firing his gun. It is not acceptable under any provocation at all for a senior moderator to say to a member under the interested eyes of thousands of members of the public whose names we will never know:

Posted by Richard (here)
Your lucky your on the other side of the Atlantic you f*cking coward.
In person I would rip your head off and sh*t down your neck for that.

Crawl back to your hole now little coward behind the screen.

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...l=1#post161029

This total loss of control left a number of members quite speechless. Yet that post remained unedited and the thread continued. At that point, I had no clue this thread existed.

Celine posted two toxic e-mails to Dale, who had written this post, doing his job as a moderator, for which he was thanked 35 times by members who were hoping that at least one mod would try to put a stop to the growing insanity:

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...948#post160948

Posted by Dale (here)
Stopping in for a minutes - there seems to be a crescendoing wave of drama and tension unfolding.

Might I suggest we turn away from our screens for a moment, think of three things we admire about the individual or individuals our frustration is directed toward, hold that feeling for several minutes, and then come back?

I wish everyone the best, and now, back to lunch for me!

In the midst of all this, GW and Lee-B were not only unsubscribed, but their accounts were deleted totally to the point where they no longer existed to be restored.

What has happening was basically a quiet battle for control of Avalon.

Then one of the moderators told me, alarmed, that Richard had told the other mods on a private chat, to which I was not party, that he intended to leave - and in so doing, was resolved to do as much verbal damage as possible to myself and the forum as a deliberate act of sabotage.

I asked all the mods to forward what he had threatened. No-one did, so I still do not know what he actually wrote. I believe, not to continue to test the loyalty of any moderators, that it is now been deleted. If I am wrong, allow me to be wrong. This has slid enough already at Richard's hands.

That stated destructive intention was the basis of my decision to insist that he did leave. I changed all the forum passwords. Because Richard and Celine are joined at the hip - and that she has been a continuous source of gossip, leaks, subtle smears, and passive-aggressive innuendo (including, in the latest thread, suggesting for the second time that I have lied to the members), she also had to go. It was totally crystal clear.

When I made my announcement here, I said I would cancel their accounts 24 hours alter. Nearly 23 hours have passed. The delay was purposeful - so that they have the conscious choice about what to say and what not to say. Celine so far has not handled that opportunity very well. I have absolutely no idea what Rich may do, but I imagine he is crafting a long post. I may be wrong. We'll see.

The Personal-Message-reading issue has just today come out in the wash, now the spin cycle has started. It was never an item to take issue with before - because I'd always assumed it was not possible.

Luke, Fred and Beth all stated clearly that they never tried to read or access read any private messages. I was not expecting them to have said anything different, and I fully believe them.

The marked silence from Richard has been extremely loud. There is compelling circumstantial evidence that he and Celine have indeed been accessing some members' Private Messages under the guise of 'investigation'.

Under any conceivable set of forum protocols, this is unacceptable.

As best I am aware, Richard has not denied that he did this - and Celine has virtually confirmed it. Meanwhile, other members, who are smart, savvy and aware, had a while back come to the exact same conclusion that Celine had access all the time to their Private Messages. This is totally not okay. We may as well be the East German Stazi.

Most of the moderator team have now left. They are split by issues of personal loyalty - and they are also exhausted. I do not fully know who is there now.

I believe we have myself, Dale, Hiram, Luke, Paul, Scott, Shane and Tania (Illuminate). I may even be wrong about that. It's pretty tough. But in a replay of the same game, there's very little if anything that I would have done differently.

Those who know me well know that I have two aspects to my personality. Some people find that a paradox. But I call it a strength. It's like a standard-looking sports car which hides a bored engine and a double turbocharger.

I am patient, tolerant, enabling, understanding, for the longest time. But when certain lines are crossed I change gear and I do not bend or move at all. That shocks some people when they don't expect it. But I am comfortable with that.

Without that steel (which Kerry also possesses, of course, as do others we know well like Bob Dean, David Icke, David Wilcock and quite a few others), we would all get crushed like bugs in this maelstrom of the alternative media - which is extremely nasty sometimes. One must have a strong backbone, or else one cannot stand upright in the hurricane.

And I will stand upright to anyone toe to toe if I have to. It is when mild-mannered Clark Kent suddenly changes not into Superman, but into Rambo. I exaggerate not. Some people here have witnessed that, and they do not like it. But it sits well with me. It's the only way to survive in certain circumstances. 98% of the time, I am the most loving, gentle, compliant soul you would ever wish to be stuck on a desert island with. There are no double standards here. What you see is how I am. And if you are not certain what you see, there are some 2,300 posts to read which will reveal everything I care about, know about, envision, love, and feel responsible for.

I say here what I reported I had said earlier in this same report. If any of you now do not understand, disagree with my viewpoint, continue to criticize me overtly or covertly, or feel that I somehow am lying or being deceptive, then please leave right now.

Form an orderly line, and I will unsubscribe you one by one with my best wishes for wherever you choose to go next. You know, you don't have to be here.

Northern Boy and Zook (who should have known better) - I hope you are paying attention.

*** I will answer any and all questions. ***

[Intraphase]

Posted by Mystique (here)
I am trying to recap what, I think, happened here.


There are a multitude of issues, and if we lay them out on this screen, maybe we can then give them some space to breathe.

Once laid out, then we can see what is our business and responsibility to solve as a community, and what is personal and should be left for the parties themselves to resolve - or not - between them.

So, What are the issues? There seems to many - correct me if I am wrong, I am trying to rely on memory here:

Gypsy Woman (GW) came on the scene presenting herself as new to forums. Some of think she misrepresented herself as a "newbie". Some think she is a plant, some think she is a victim, some think she is unstable and a provocateur, and some think she is dramatic but harmless.

Gypsy Woman (GW) was banned for an outburst against Spirit Wolf. Spirit Wolf was either targeted by GW or he targeted her.

GW went to Bill after being banned, and Bill vouched for her return saying she will come back with a vengeance. (Wielding a saber or something)

Celine feels that Bill divulged a confidence to Gypsy Woman that was then used against her? I think it had to do with the term, "bi-polar". Am I right on that?

Celine felt undermined by Bill's decision to back GW, and felt disrespected by it.

GW came back and started a rant thread. During this time she posted a picture of gun - which was removed by Mod. She had sent 14 members a PM that criticized Bill, Richard and Celine. IceCold said she directed a murderous vid directed at him, and accused him of threatening her and her son. Celine and her went back and forth with attacks. The thread was merged with another thread by Richard.

GW started another rant thread for Emma, and it was closed. GW was banned again for the PM's and threats?

Celine started the Worm Tongue thread because of the above and the stress and constraints put on Richard and other behind the scene issues she could not divulge - including a broken promise she said she had with Bill.

LeeB joined the thread calling himself a "guest," and some say he stirred up stuff with Celine. Richard stepped in to defend her and "snapped" making threatening remarks, and banned LeeB. Some say he made good points, some say he didn't deserve being attacked, some say he attacked Richard's wife and deserved what he got - out of honor.

Then there is the issue about PMs and whether Mods: can or cannot read them, whether they did or did not, whether they should or should not, and under what circumstances - if any.

What have I missed or gotten wrong?

Gypsy Woman has a user index that can be referenced retelling the story of her entry into the forum.
In this thread the passive / assertive / aggressive balance is represented by two unanswered questions.

The judgement rendered by Avalon members currently stands as:

Chris has adjudged her as "Paranoid."
NancyV has adjudged her as "Chaotic."
Icecold has adjudged her as "Disturbed."
Isotool has adjudged her as "Inappropriate."
Carmody has adjudged her as "Unconstructive."
Golden Years has adjudged her as "Discordant."
Northern Boy has adjudged her as "Unmedicated."
Jorr Lundstrom has adjudged her as "Threatening."

The currently unanswered questions stand as:

Was the Avalon database accessed to engage in a possible coordinated criminal stalking activity.

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...l=1#post162501

What is the identity of the person who forwarded Gypsy Woman's private emails believing she was a imminent and grave threat to the Avalon Community.

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...l=1#post162033

On what evidence was a decision made on day two of Gypsy Woman's membership in the Avalon Community that she was a potentially dangerous person. Who were the witnesses and what was their evidence presented to the moderator.

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...l=1#post162671

-------------

Aside:
Utilizing a room of mirrors is a mystery solvent technique when there is more than one individual involved in more than one locale and multiple staging points.

------------- Mirror Events

In a possible effort to permanently silence a witness (Charles) it is alleged an associate may have been attacked (Gypsy Woman.)

The echo in the room of mirrors occurred when:

In a possible effort to permanently silence a witness (Richard) it is alleged an associate may have been attacked (Celine.)

------------- Conflict's Cultural Background

Participants were repeatedly warned of grave supernatural forces and currents laying dormant only inches below the tranquil murky soil of Ye Old Avalonville.
It was hinted The Prince of Darkness himself might be in the nearby labyrinth.

https://projectavalon.net/forum4/show...ll=1#post89293

-------------

Where's John White Esquire??
Raise the Avalon Bat Signal Robin.







UPDATE

The timing of this post was the timing of this post.
Please advise if this content should be edited or amended.

[aikisaw]

Posted by Zook (here)
Good Morning Good Avalon Good Bill,

Bill, I think it unfortunate that you took this course of action with respect to Richard and Celine. You owe them both an apology, at the very least.

I came to Avalon about six months ago because I believed in your integrity. I believed in the man in the famous hat that I had seen in all those videos. I trusted in his view of the world, and in the way he treated people. A genteel soul and a group leader. Sadly, I must leave now because the illusion of an enlightened soul and a gentle man ... has been replaced with the tragic reality of a man burdened with ego, beset with misguided purpose, quick to throw friends under the bus, never admitting to fallibility when his mistakes are pointed out to him, overrules consensus decisions arrived by the moderating staff to protect the integrity and charter of Avalon ... in short, an autocrat. I think you were a good man - and deep inside, may still be a good man ... but you have clearly lost your way. I would be delinquent in my duty as an Avalonian, and as a friend to the genuinely great people and passengers on the ship of Avalon (that I have come to respect and love) ... if I kept silent on these observations.

The Ship of Avalon is a volunteer argosy. We are all here with our time and energy to try and make the sail a clean one, an informational one, an adventurous one. The charter is is essentially round table in design (e.g. a ship of equals); but even a ship of equals requires a crew. And Bill, to your credit, you were a good Captain for much of the early voyage. But sometimes, in the fog, even good captains lose their way. Unless there is a lighthouse to warn of danger, the ship will run aground in the night. To this, the moderating team was that lighthouse ... aboard the ship but also on the boulders of the rugged shore. Two places at once. And in that lighthouse - while I've been here - Richard was the large light bulb. Without his dedication and love for the ship and voyage, this sail would've grounded long ago. I have not one bad word to say against him. And if you had been thinking clearly, neither would you. Celine is a good heart. I know her basically through her posts on Avalon as you all do. I have only positive things to say about her, also. If she has a fault, maybe it is being too open with her heart. But that's not really a fault as much as an inconvenience to those not used to loving energy. Certainly, Avalonians could use some love these days.

I made the final decision to deMOD myself after I'd seen this post of yours today. It reeks of throwing a good faithful friend under the bus - who's always had the best interests of Avalon and yourself at heart ... and promoting yourself as the white knight riding in to save Avalon. Sorry ... I've always been a straight shooting son of a hitch (Mom and Dad got together in 1962) ... and so i have to call it like I see it, whatever the consequences. Something has happened to you Bill. I don't know what. But it has taken a good man to bad places. Only you can fix yourself and your compunction for autocracy. Maybe then, you will be right again to captain this ship to the adventures on the high seas. I say this with all good intentions for you. Even as I leave the Avalon crew alongside other good people - all exceptional souls - I wish you the very best in the future.

Humble opinions all around.



ps: To all Avalonians, including those I've disagreed with in the past ... you have my love and respect.

ps2: In the end, it wasn't a gypsy ... or one to kill a mocking bird ... it was AUTOCRACY.

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
--------
Dear Friends:

Many of you will have seen the WORM TONGUE thread that was started yesterday by Celine.

If you have not, you may need quite a strong stomach to wade through it to the end.

I closed it as soon as it was brought to my attention.

---*** mod-edit: trim out some excess quoted material ***---

With my best wishes to everyone ~ Bill

Damn...

You will be missed. Your A Documentary More Powerful than Loose Change was one of the first threads I went to when I joined. Way back, when I thought I knew something about 9-11. It was an education.

I hope you reconsider.

I wish you the best whatever path you choose.

[Flash]

deleted by author

[Star Gazer]

Bill is the second-coming of King Arthur--I didn't see that one coming.

[Janos]

Sounds like a major source of your problems dear sir, is that you are not taking the counsel of your technical staff and trying to make decisions, that (to use a term you are fond of), are not qualified to make.

How many times have we seen you post a record of a conversation when you state “I'm making the call” on technical matters, when you are absolutely not qualified to do so.

This is not an insult. The second you merged the private and public areas of the forum accidentally, you should have sworn off messing with things that you were not competent in using.

Like using a firearm without training, poking around the back room of a forum that you don't know how to run from an IT standpoint is a very, very, very bad idea.

I love ya Bill, but you just don't know when you're wrong.

POST UPDATE

I have been asked to correct my post by Mr. Ryan. It seems that the merging of threads from the private and public areas was a simple mistake.

This may very well have been the case. I have absolutely no way of knowing for sure either way, as we run into the 'he said, she said' at this point.

But I offer this point for your consideration: Every story has more than one side.

[Isostool]

This is offered for those who might need it and is written with healing in mind. But if you know your steel, then indeed you know it. Avalon is an important body. It just IS.

--------------------------------
It is about having a unifying factor that is SO strong that it keeps your focus through divisions. We don't need to make one up - an enemy, or have one made up for us. We already have one we can call many names.. our inner weaknesses is a good way of saying it. If our priority is on staying unified then division is relegated to a second priority and movement is continued - towards fixing the planet. It's not really about anything 'talked' about 'here' [the 'issues' going on], not really. It's about all the people suffering. And the fact that as all this 'goes down' - we are NOT doing what we COULD be doing to help move the earth into a position where this suffering is relieved... not doing this to our utmost.... to the best of our abilities...., as a priority - for our beloved one/s.

Self sacrifice means sacrificing things which are less important for something of a greater importance. Every living thing that is suffering. They are a part of your body. They are your body, and that of your loved ones... They ARE your loved ones.

Is it at all possible that if we are not comprehensively capable of finding our functioning unity through unified focus, that the universe will have to thrust a catalyst upon us? Just a thought. It might not be so gentle as we could be of our own violition..

Unification brings motion and efficient functioning. Staying INTACT is a priority. of course there may be restructuring, but what I am seeing here is instability of a nature and magnitude in things and places that really should know better.

When it gets like this... you just have to do it for THEM: the ones who can't do it for themselves. Those in incredible suffering. those who are in more than YOU ARE.

----------------

bits from the last post, which I took down, ....:

Look to the most high purpose you can find - and do it for THAT.

With the understanding that YOU SHALL NOT ALLOW YOUR WEAKNESSES TO BEAT YOU.

this is unashamedly about: SELF MASTERY.

Proclaim that you have the strength to stay in your centre about it - not 50% but give it all you have - give it 100%. Take a knife, if necessary, to the parts of yourself which keep you from your centre - each implement has its place and time.... claim your self mastery and sovereignty. and if in doubt, just be NOTHINGNESS. nothing can touch you in that. because you in essence, don't exist. [well you do.. but in your own singular universe - and you are the master of it, with the only key].

Reclaim the part of you that is just plainly 100% uninterested with the stir, with anyone's bait. put it ALL down and go back into the nothingness. That is what you are. silence. solid. peace. in here there is your SELF(true). And your sovereignty.

I'm not saying don't deal with it. I'm just saying stay as the rock of your centre. The truth is a rock which those who do not know themselves bleed upon.

being your true self in the eternal silence of I AM is the finest weapon of unified peace we shall ever know.

[Anchor]

Posted by Star Gazer (here)
Bill is the second-coming of King Arthur--I didn't see that one coming.

According to Charles.

[Noble Hops]

Thanks for taking the time to write that, Bill!

[Ahkenaten]

So..............it just as Alice said, gets curioser and curioser.........AND SADDER AND SADDER AND DARKER AND DARKER. It is not a joke. This is real life here. Hmmmm...... I see some threads here: so Charles and Bill have an "Arthurian" connection on several levels that is playing out. One element of the destructive forces at work in here display other symbolism, namely the symbols of the ancient Tarot (cups, wands, coins and swords.) Women, wolves, wands, swords, coins, cups, and Gypsies (known for divination and necromancy using Tarot cards.) There are some very dark forces at work here, people and this ain't pretty on any level. I personally still have no idea who or what has been using PA as its chessboard/battlefield 'though I have a few theories, - but this, IMO - goes way, way beyond personality conflicts and workplace/disciplinary issues! I wish whoever, or WHATEVER has come in here to create discord and push things past the tipping point (under the principle of Order Out of Chaos) would pull up their long skirts and hoods and leave. This stinks and is not right on any level. What is manifesting here originates at the energetic level. Perhaps we should all look into our hearts and perform an exorcism, if need be, because one is clearly needed. And that includes me! This is not fake human suffering happening here, this is not virtual destruction, this is real. And for those who think they may they have won a skirmish in a larger war here, Karma is real, and there is no avoiding the consequences of our own actions. This is a play of ALL of our making! Is THIS what the Creator wishes us to do with our lives and energy? No, it sounds like the work of something quite different that does not love us and does not wish us well.

I still have hope that we can carry on, with the discernment not to be led around by our you-know-whats by the dark side of inner natures, and of others.

I personally hate to see the grim Jolly Roger hoisted over this place. Everyone is bleeding here, even if they do not know it yet. This is a very bad thing done here.

Sincerely,

Ahk

[Whiskey_Mystic]

/Begin_rant.exe

I just decided recently that I needed to take a break from Avalon, but I could feel this drama and it pulled me back.

For what it is worth, I support you, Bill. If for no other reason than because you have earned that support. It is not blind support, nor is it given blindly. As far as who did what when and second-guessing Bill's judgement, let me say clearly that if everyone at Avalon walked their talk, if everyone at Avalon acted for the highest good of all beings, if everyone at Avalon ....Dammit we wouldn't be having this issue! There is nothing wrong with sharing your concerns and disagreements like civilized ladies and gentlemen. Disagree with respect and honor. Is it so hard??

I am a professional online community manager. I would never be so generous as to explain my every action to everyone the way Bill has done for you. You people take apart Bill and question his motives and even his sanity without ever knowing even half of what is really going on. Are you all so arrogant that you can't take a step back and think hey maybe you don't have the whole picture? Thank yourselves that Bill is indeed so generous to you.

/end_rant.exe

Thank you. I feel better having said my peace. I did notice some of you trying to inject a higher vibration. Good for you. I'm proud to be with you.



Avalon, there is work to do. Are you up to the task? Then let's get on with being who we came here to be.



I'm just going to repost this from feb 9:


Dear Avalon,

Be gentle with each other.
See divinity shine through each other.
Celebrate your different perspectives.
Be worthy of the Earth as She has been worthy of You.
Be blessed.
Remember who you are and what you represent.
There is so much awaiting you.

[Lifesong]

Bill! Lol.


Lets get back to work, kids.

[Northern Boy]

Oh i here you Bill And If you decide to ban me it bothers me not. The truth always comes out Bill it has a way of having its own life banning one only delays a short while the release of it . It also makes a forum membership wonder why the ban took place in the first Place was it to silence one ? or restore order .


You made some posts I`d like clarification on clearly you saw Charles using your forum to gain information he could use to his advantage here or against you . What steps did you take to rectify this and what was those results? You made in my opinion and those at many other forums a glaring error in allowing Charles to have a platform as Nothing has resulted from it other then what we see right now It is your forum you must accept a major share of the blame for allowing it to get in this condition . You can`t just pass the blame off on others . You are here reading l;ike the rest of us i see it every day .

[John101]

Posted by Star Gazer (here)
Bill is the second-coming of King Arthur--I didn't see that one coming.

But can he ride a horse

Wow I go missing for a few days and come back to well I don't know what.
I think I will take another day or two off. (Treat myself to some bliss)

[davyj0nes]

wow, this sorta makes everything be seen in a whole new light. i have no idea what to make of any of this, very strange indeed.

[Chicodoodoo]

Thank you, Bill, for your sincere testimony.

Any lack of trust coming from Avalon members was not due to fear. I believe it was due to a lack of transparency. We simply were not privy to what was really going on behind the scenes. We could only see what was being presented in the Avalon forums (a trusted source), and from trusted "senior members" no less. Keep in mind that, like you, we are also unusual people, willing to temporarily suspend belief when new information comes to light, such as that presented by Celine. It was quite unnerving, to say the least, but so much of what this community must deal with is like that.

Now that we have finally heard your side of the story, I suspect that things make much more sense to everyone. You can't imagine how much that is appreciated. Again, thank you.

Please get some sleep. I believe you can rest easy now.

[Belle]

Bill, what you have done here took real courage, and I applaude you for that. Thank you so much for the trust you have given us as members of your forum to bring to light what has been done in the darkness. In many ways, it was not necessary for you to do so...what happened on the Worm Tongue thread was enough to those of us on there at the time.

You have my total respect and support.

[DianeKJ]

Bill thank you for taking the time to share that, I'm certain it wasn't easy. I'm not going to pretend that I understand every nuance of what is going on behind the scenes. I do know we have work to do, broken pieces to clean up.

I hold space in my heart for everyone on Avalon, even those who are leaving us.

It is time to build instead of tear down.
Namaste,
Di

[Hawkwind]

Posted by Bill Ryan (here)
I will answer any and all questions. [/I]***

No questions, Bill. Thank you for opening up with us. That was one hell of a post. I'm too tired to put together a proper response at present, but do want to say at least that the tensions going on have been obvious to many of us. A good airing of grievances is exactly what was needed. If I'm included in your list of ingrates and critics, I'm sorry for coming across that way. Be well and good night.

[Bill Ryan]

Posted by John (here)

Posted by Star Gazer (here)
Bill is the second-coming of King Arthur--I didn't see that one coming.

According to Charles.

Yes. It may or may not be true. My personal conviction is that it doesn't matter. I will not be presiding over any modern-day Knights of the Round Table.

Being associated with legendary historical figures can be much more of a curse than a blessing. I've spoken many times with David Wilcock about this, who is reasonably convinced that he was the great seer Edgar Cayce.

But whether he was or was not is totally besides the point. It doesn't matter whether you were a King, a beggar, or a great poet. It's how one relates to that concept that is the important factor. The great danger is that the present-day individual him- or herself may come to believe that they are not as important, significant and/or valuable as someone who is no longer alive.

It's who you are now that counts.

Note, incidentally, that Charles does not see me as the 'reincarnation of Arthur': just that he was a bloodline ancestor.