Angel/Spirit Guide Makes Self Known in Real Life Experience

[onawah]

I think I may have posted something about my Near Death Experience a long time ago on PA, but it might have been the original PA, and I doubt if I could find it now, if those archives are still even accessible.
But I had been thinking recently about posting something about it again.
The fact that this odd conversation with DNA came about in connection with the “Angel Like Alien” thread was a little spooky.
Because I feel like I had a very real “communication” with my “Guardian Angel”, "Spirit Guides" (or whatever name you prefer), regarding my NDE.
So I decided to take those as cues that now would be a good time to share my story again.

It wasn't actually during the NDE that this spiritual connection came about however.
It was maybe 2 years later.

It wasn't one of those inspiring NDEs, with the tunnel and the white light and the loved ones waiting on the other side.
I was in a very dark and scary and excruciatingly painful place, but some friends came to the hospital while I was in the ER and my vital signs were fading.
I could feel their love and light pulling me back into my body.
I didn't want to go back there, but staying in the dark, scary space certainly wasn't a desirable option.
Perhaps I would have got to the light-filled tunnel if they hadn't shown up when they did, but I guess I will never know.

I had been hit by a speeding hit-and-run driver earlier that evening on a dark street at the foot of a steep hill in Noe Valley, San Francisco, just as I was starting to step off the curb to cross the street.
The headlights of the car that hit me weren't on, and I didn't see or hear it coming, and it actually veered off slightly from the street onto the curb where I was standing, so it was very much a case of me not knowing what hit me.
There were two eye witnesses who said the car was going very fast.
It was a broad street, with trolley tracks down the middle, so essentially it was a 3 lane street.
The impact threw me tumbling high into the air and all the way across the street to the opposite side, where I landed on my back on the concrete, hitting my head very hard.
I had broken bones in both arms and both legs, broken ribs and shoulder, a cracked pelvic bone, concussion, internal bleeding, and a crushed acetabulum (socket and top of the femur) on my left side where the car had struck me.
I was hospitalized in Intensive Care for several weeks and for 3&1/2 months in all at S.F. General Hospital, and 6 weeks at U.C.S.F. Medical Ctr. after that.

When I finally got out, I was still in a great deal of pain, and was hobbling around on crutches. I refused the Total Hip Replacement surgery because the doctors had no idea if it would work in my case, and I did not want to be their guinea pig in any case. Even if they had guaranteed success, I doubt I would have believed them. My faith in doctors was considerably shaken during my stay at S.F. General, a "teaching hospital" with a very bad reputation. (There was yet another scandal about the shoddy conditions there shortly after I was discharged.)

I had no health insurance, no family members to rely on or other support system, so I ended up living alone on Welfare in a region that was very new to me. ( I had moved from the East Coast to S.F. just 2 months before the accident, and was pretty much on my own, except for a couple of friends, one who had come with me from S.F., but who was leaving soon for Europe.
It was no fun at all.

Skip forward to almost 2 years after the accident; I was living on the Peninsula, in San Mateo, a sort of suburb of S.F.
One day I was hitchhiking on El Camino Real, the long and busy main thoroughfare, on the way to the neighboring suburb of San Bruno to see a Legal Aid lawyer.
( I was hoping I would be able to contest my case as a Welfare recipient and move up to what at that time was "Aid to the Totally Disabled", which would have upped my income considerably. )
I was walking with a cane by then. I had no car and there was no public transportation going where I needed to go, so hitching was the only way I could get to distant locations.
I wasn't too nervous about hitching on El Camino Real that day, because it was daylight and it was a busy highway, with lots of intersections.

So I barely looked at the car that pulled over and couldn't really see the driver through the closed window. In any case, I was running late, so I just got in.
The driver took off as soon as I had closed the door, and I got a quick look at his profile, then noticed an ashtray full of stinky cigarette butts and a few crushed, empty beer cans on the floor.
I didn't feel any dangerous vibes coming from the driver, but when I took a closer look, I felt some revulsion.

Have you ever seen a comic strip where there is a slovenly slob so seedy looking that there are little moths drawn, circling his head?
That was this guy.
He turned briefly and kind of leered at me (although in a not entirely unfriendly sort of way), asking me where I was headed.
As soon as I saw the frontal view of his face and looked into his eyes, I knew he was the hit-and-run-driver who had struck me.

There is no way to explain this kind of KNOWING.
It was kind of like a psychic heart attack.
My pulse began to race, I felt dizzy, nauseous, and I began hyperventilating.
I was about to have a full-fledged panic attack ( my first ever), and the only thing I wanted was to GET OUT OF THAT CAR!!
I managed to choke out in a croaking voice that I needed for him to stop the car...NOW!
He stared at me with wide-eyed alarm and immediately pulled over.
I was opening the door before the car had even come to a stop, and was out of there like a shot.
He pulled back out just as quickly, and as he pulled away, I managed to note that the car he was driving was an orange El Camino (a kind of abbreviated station wagon/pickup truck with an open bed—yes, he was driving an El Camino on the highway named El Camino Real).
Just the kind of car that had struck me, according to the two eye witnesses who saw it happen.
I could not have possibly taken note of the tag numbers in the state I was in.
But there had been orange paint from the car that hit me found on my purse, and that was proof enough for me in that moment that this was the same car.

Not that I really cared so much about that just then, because something much more important was happening to me.
I KNEW that it was no coincidence that I had been picked up that day by that man.

I stood leaning up against the nearest building at hand for some time, bent at the waist, my hands clenched in fists, gasping for breath, but slowly recovering from the panic attack...
And KNOWING in my very soul that some loving presence had engineered that meeting; indeed, had answered my prayers.
For a long time, I had been stuck emotionally, frozen in time, locked in unforgiving fury and a loss of faith in myself and in Life.
I wanted to know WHO had done that to me and WHY, and I felt that until I had an answer, I could not, would not, forgive and go on with my life.

But this was not what I had expected, and it took me by complete surprise.
Actually, I had not expected an answer at all, and certainly not THIS answer.
Now that I knew that the man who had hit me was more of a hapless, witless moron more than an evil, murderous person, I realized there was no reason for what had happened other than that he was most likely an alcoholic and an oblivious soul who had probably no clue as to what he had done.

It no longer mattered so much WHY this had happened to me; whether it was some kind of karmic retribution or just something that had happened to me by default, because I had not been able to find the strength to avoid that juncture in my life's path and create a more positive one.
The fact is that I had known the morning of my NDE that I should not have gone out that day, but I went anyway.
As I found out much later, there was a huge CME that day, which is known to cause all kinds of physical, mental and emotional problems in humans, and I was intuitive enough to feel the danger that morning before I even went out.
So in a way, it may have been my own fault what had happened as much as it was his.
But I knew the responsibility for my life was my own, regardless, and clinging to my feelings of victimhood was counterproductive.

But as I stood there, dizzy and gasping-- blessing of all blessings-- I could feel the rage draining out of me, and that empty space was being filled instead with the knowledge that I was not alone, that I was loved and that there was meaning in Life, even in the midst of the pain, tragedy and shattered dreams.
And because I had received an answer to my prayer, I was able to let go at last and forgive the unknown soul I had perceived as my enemy.

It took much longer for me to begin to forgive myself, and to pick up the threads of my life so that I could begin weaving them into a more meaningful pattern again.
But it was a huge turning point for me, and I knew that I was going to be able to find life worthy of living again.
Though it would not be easy, it was made so much easier because I finally knew that I really was not alone.

Thanks to that loving higher Self, spirit or spirits or whatever or whoever it was who knew me so well, and was able to provide for me the means to the insight that I so needed.

[DNA]

This is a wonderfull story Onawah. And you orchestrated one of the best and most pertinent use of the smiley I may have ever seen.

I don't know what to say about your NDE, it certainly doesn't fit the profile I'm accustomed to seeing or rather hearing when some one recants an NDE.

I suppose the most important aspect of your story is the fact that you felt the presense of a celestial human care taker so to speak.
A guardian angel.
You felt the presense of God.

I have stories that I could offer to help give validation in this area, but, I have got to say, there is a really good one from a movie I'll go ahead and use instead.

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=ZnhRssAdJxw

Whether or not what we experienced was an 'According to Hoyle' miracle is irrelevant. What is relevant is that I felt the touch of God. God got involved.
Jules Winfield

[Mike]

fascinating story! for so many reasons...

all the esoterica and spiritual aspects aside, i'm just incredibly impressed by your resilience in dealing w/your health issues w/out any sort of support from family or friends! and the courage to reject the doc's suggestion of hip replacement...i mean, in a vulnerable state like that you were still able to keep your wits. i'm impressed.

if the story just stopped there it still would have been a great story!

for years i asked for direct communication from my guides, right before i fell asleep, just like all the books suggest - but nothing it's always suggested that you keep asking but i never understood this! finally i was sick of asking all-together and i aborted the mission...

i have to say here: i am sort of fascinated with "dark" NDE's. i'd be interested in hearing more. because as fascinating as benevolent NDE's are, i've heard them all a million times.

this story was sort of stephen king meets 'highway to heaven' - incredibly creepy but with a feel-good ending. what an unbelievable synchronicity, meeting up with that guy...what was it? 2 years later?

very inspirational! very heart-warming! thanks Onawah!

[Ernie Nemeth]

Thanks for sharing Onawah.
Really touching and amazing story of life's mystery unravelled.

Hope you find what you are looking for. And that you can now heal.

Love,
Ernie

[onawah]

Pulp Fiction was an amazing movie.
Shockingly violent, yet so funny.
I loved "Get Shorty" too.

But as to my experience, I didn't feel like it was the presence of God, though I did feel it was of a being of a higher dimension that was acting on my behalf, and was divinely inspired.
I did feel something like the presence of God a couple of years earlier, when I lived for a year at a remote Zen Buddhist Center/commune in the mountains of Virginia.
I was deprogramming from my Christian upbringing and had problems with "God" which I associated with patriarchy, so what I felt I described as the Tao.
I was loving feeling one with Nature, but the Tao to me was more like feeling the source of Nature, and it was even more wonderful.
But it made leaving the Center very difficult, followed by a long and difficult attack of Culture Shock.
I also fell in love, had a child, and gave him up for adoption during that time, between leaving the Center and moving to SF.
One heck of a Reality Sandwich!
It was really hard to feel a part of this world after having had a taste of that other reality.
And I couldn't really convince myself anymore that renouncing or escaping this world was the way to get to that other reality permanently.
I felt that I had to bring the two more together, by transforming this one into something more resembling that one.
That was in the early 70s, and that's been more my goal ever since then.
Lots of slipping and sliding along the way...but things seem so much clearer now.
I think for some people, this lifetime has been about finishing up with 3D experiencing, and it's been incredibly intense.
Got to get all those lessons learned before graduating.
A real cram course!

I wanted to include some more smilies in the story, but we are only allowed 7 in one post.
So here are a few more that would have been fun to add.


Here is the video about another woman's NDE that DNA sent me

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=WNbdUEqDB-k

[Mike]

oh no! i think i've started a 'smiley trend!

can we really only use 7?

[onawah]

Yep. I think it used to be fewer, though, so there's been some upgrading, apparently. It would be fun if we could add some new ones to the list.

[Mike]

couldn't agree more!

well, i've had enough tonight.

[ThePythonicCow]

Posted by onawah (here)
Yep. I think it used to be fewer, though, so there's been some upgrading, apparently. It would be fun if we could add some new ones to the list.

If you catch me in a good mood, I can add to the list

[ViralSpiral]

Posted by Paul (here)

Posted by onawah (here)
Yep. I think it used to be fewer, though, so there's been some upgrading, apparently. It would be fun if we could add some new ones to the list.

If you catch me in a good mood, I can add to the list

and are you?

where to post suggestions?

[onawah]

Thanks Paul!
I appreciate you.
Is the 7 limit likely to go up again?
They really are fun.

[ThePythonicCow]

Posted by ViralSpiral (here)
and are you?

where to post suggestions?

Well, I'll usually notice a reply to a post of mine, or a Private Message (PM) sent to me.

It takes me a bit of futzing around to get a good image, so you can improve the chances of me being in a willing mood by having the suggested small (16x16 to 48x48 pixel jpeg, png or gif) image already selected (visible somewhere on the net, link provided.)

I tend to take more interest in something distinctively new, rather than minor variations of what we already have.

¤=[Post Update]=¤

Posted by onawah (here)
Is the 7 limit likely to go up again?

I'll stick that question in Ilie's queue. Changing the limit looks easy enough (I just found the setting on my admin screen), but Ilie would know better than I would whether changing it is harmless, or would have undesired risks. vBulletin has its quirks.

[ThePythonicCow]

Posted by ViralSpiral (here)
where to post suggestions?

I've added four new ones:

(Spelled: :bigfish: :gaah: :paintgirl: :chess:)

That's enough for tonight .

===

If there's one you want to use that is not on the forum list, you can always use it by putting its URL between [IMG]...[/IMG] brackets.

For a random example, entering [IMG]http://images.findicons.com/files/icons/537/nba/128/bulls.png[/IMG] will display

(An NBA Chicago Bulls icon)

===

Time for one more:

[pickle]

Wow Onawah, I'm blown away with your post - thank you so much for sharing these times in your past.


Love, light and peace,

Pickle

[Marianne]

Onawah, very glad that you shared your story with us. It's inspiring to know that you found meaning in life after tragedy ... I like to think others (myself included) will see this and be able to find new hope as well. Synchronicity is amazing, isn't it? I think it's one way that Spirit lets us know we are not alone.

Thank you so much, my dear.

Marianne

[jcocks]

Also shows that it pays to be paying attention to life, you never know where the next message will come from!

[Tony]

Thank you Onawah.
I feel that as we progress we become more sensitive,
and there is a fine golden thread that we follow.
When we wobble, there also seems to be support.
When we see others wobble, we should support.

With sensitivity comes responsibility.

Love
Tony

[Marianne]

Posted by pie'n'eal (here)
Thank you Onawah.
I feel that as we progress we become more sensitive,
and there is a fine golden thread that we follow.
When we wobble, there also seems to be support.
When we see others wobble, we should support.

With sensitivity comes responsibility.

Love
Tony

Very nice, Tony. Thank you.

[jade]

Hello Avalonians

I've newly joined the site and been enjoying learning from all of your posts over the last couple of weeks.. Onawah's post (thank you Onawah!) brought back my own memories of a similar experience which I'd like to share.. it can serve as an introduction too!

I believe I had a near death experience. During September 2005 I was taken into hospital with multiple organ failure, within 12 hours or so I was placed in stasis (coma) on life support, my family was told I needed a liver transplant within 24 hours or I would die. As I was falling into the coma I kept repeating to the nurses that I would be fine that it was ok, Victoria was with me and had told me I would be okay. I have never known anyone called Victoria nor do I have anyone in my family by that name either living or passed on. Even though I was supposed to be completely unconscious I was aware of what was going on around me, just unable to speak or move. I remember the medical staff putting me on the ventilator and performing various procedures, the pain and discomfort was unbearable and seemed to go on for an eternity, what felt like days, the words torture and suffocation repeated in my head.

I began to pray so hard, the next thing I remember I was sitting in an empty white room, pain gone, there was a door opposite me, I didn't feel inclined to go through, I just sat there, so happy. I couldn't believe it I had prayed and been answered. The next thing I remember is a lady had come to find me, she was upset, her son had died and she wanted me to find him for her, I can see the child's face a toddler with blonde hair and blue eyes, I told his mother that he was fine, I don't remember anything else.

Then I was on top of the hospital, there was a castle up there. It was made of sand, it was solid but still fluid if you understand what I mean, the sands were fine and gold, like flecks of light and they made a solid structure but were moving continuously, alive. I seemed to be there for a long time, listening to music, it was beautiful, I remember thinking it was similar to Chopin, just piano. I danced around the castle, I felt totally light on my feet, weightless, I felt totally free and expansive, and I danced so elegantly (I'm not such an elegant dancer usually!), then I was painting and made sculptures, not with my hands but with my thought, they were made of gold flecks and rich green sands, moving, alive. I can't describe to you how happy I was there.

The last thing I remember is sitting up in a bed in a white room, there was no colour, the scene was in black and white. The bed was surrounded by children, of different nationalities, they were on their knees with their hands clasped really tightly in front of their faces. They were praying for me to go home, I could hear them repeating 'please go home'. I was unconscious for 9/10 days on life support, and it took me several days to come around fully after that as I was heavily drugged. I wish I remembered the sequence of events. When I eventually did come around I was euphoric, absolutely in love with everyone and everything, this state lasted or at least a week after I regained full consciousness (until I was told by a doctor that I had died for 40-50 minutes, I no longer felt euphoric, I felt guilty for being so happy when my family and friends had been through so much pain).

At that time I lay in the bed very sick unable to even feed myself or move or walk, but I really didn't care. I lay and contemplated my realizations, I didn't know that I had flatlined, I believed that my soul had left my body because of pain and my prayers. I felt I had been given a gift, an insight into our oneness and purpose, that we are aspects of God and our gift is creation - to create.

I don't know if what I experienced was a Near Death Experience, as it doesn't feature the traditional tunnel, bright light or meeting loved ones. I would love to know whether it was or not, but I am grateful for the experience and the opportunity it has given me for growth and learning. I have made very positive changes in my life as a result and realize my only pursuit now can be that of enlightenment or the realization of spirit.

So here I am!

[onawah]

Such a beautiful experience, Jade.
Thanks for sharing that, and welcome to the PA forum.
I would say you definitely had a NDE.
The tunnel and white light are common features of a NDE, but are not necessarily always part of it.

For those who are not familiar with the subject, one of the more fascinating cases of NDEs is Dannion Brinkley's, who has survived several NDEs and came back from the first one with visions of the future he was shown by some higher dimensional beings that later came true.
He's written several books, and has been prominent in the media for a long time. You can see interviews of him on youtube and there was a movie made about his life, starring Eric Roberts.

It's on youtube at

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=X9SRzBGu_2c

Here is a fascinating interview with him:

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=Gz6lviCLYx0

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=puwwMZHUWb0

Source: https://youtube.com/watch?v=kseLc57kpYc